 Episode Fifty: My CardAlice and I took an Uber to the hospital, following right behind the ambulance that took Bella to the nearest emergency room. It wasn’t that far. When she came out of the rear, she was covered in a silver blanket. Her head was resting against the back of the stretcher with her eyes half-closed. They already had her foot wrapped in ice packs and raised. Her best friend had both of their purses, charging after her quickly. It was hard to keep up. She pushed past people to get beside her. “Hey there,” she cooed. Bella looked at her slowly. “We’re right here.” She smiled slightly. “Don’t be dramatic. It’s not that bad.” Her eyes rolled before glancing at me. Alice said nothing, just sighing. She shook her head a little, taking her hand. They got her arranged in the room, moving her over to the bed. My jacket was still around her, but she was trembling. A doctor and a nurse were waiting by the door for the paramedics to finish, reading the chart they had started. “Hello,” the physician said as he came towards her. “So… There was a fight?” “Not so much. Someone attacked her, and she defended herself. She kicked him twice,” I explained, gripping her hand. She wasn’t up to talking. “Okay. I’m very sorry that happened. The police will want to speak to you once we get her settled,” he revealed. “Ms. Swan, can you tell me your pain level right now? ‘Zero’ being fine and normal, ‘ten’ being the worst you’ve ever felt in your life.” “Mm…” She hummed and swallowed. “I’d say it’s a five or six. And I can’t move my foot at all. I’ve broken toes before, but this is worse.” “Are you allergic to anything?” She shook her head. “We’re going to start an IV line, just in case we need it, and we’ll give you some medication through that. We’ll do that first, and then we’ll get X-rays,” he informed us before looking back at the nurse that was assisting him. “Morphine. I can tell from here her foot is swelling pretty good.” She nodded and went to work getting the things she would need for that. “I’m going to take a closer look.” This finally pulled Bella out of her daze. She squeezed my hand, fat tears rolling down her cheeks as she held in her sobs of anguish. It broke my heart. Leaning my forehead against her temple, I pecked it lightly to comfort her. “Shh… It’ll be okay. I’m here.” She pressed her nose against mine, closing her eyes. “I know.” Alice held her fingers until the nurse put the needle into the top of her hand. It only took a couple of moments. She already had the bottle and syringe ready. They also had a mild sedative for her. The doctor prepped it when it was time, flicking the tube to get the air out before pushing it into the IV line. Bella melted instantly into the plastic mattress, sighing in relief. “That should only take a few minutes to kick in. We’ll be right back,” he explained before sweeping out of the room. “Oh, that’s better,” my girlfriend mumbled. “It’s so warm.” “They gave you the good stuff, didn’t they?” Alice inquired with a smirk as she pushed Bella’s hair out of her eyes. She nodded with a slight smile. “Aren’t you a little old to get in schoolyard fights?” Her grin was funny, her head weaving. “Apparently not. He started it. Tell me to speak English, pendejo,” she muttered. “I finished it, though.” “You sure did,” she grinned encouragingly. “Teach him not to fuck with little women.” “That’s right.” They were joking, and I was positive that I was having a panic attack. I could barely think, let alone talk. Alice looked over at me. “Eddie,” she called my name calmly. “How are you feeling?” Clearing my throat, I sniffled. “Um… I’m okay. I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.” “Are you sure?” Bella worriedly questioned as she looked at me. Her face had relaxed some. Limply, she brushed her knuckles over my cheek. “You don’t have a fever.” I took her hand, then kissed her palm. “I’m alright,” I promised. There was a knock at the door. It was the nurse with some big machinery. There were also two cops. My heart was in my throat. “I’m going to need everybody to go outside,” she declared as she came in. “Except for you. You don’t go anywhere,” she directed at Bella. “I’ll be right out there if you need me,” I said as I kissed her forehead. I moved into the hall, and one of the officers smiled at me. “Hi. I’m guessing you need to speak to me?” “Yes, Mr. Cullen,” he began brightly. He was young. I realized he recognized me. “We need to ask you a few questions if that’s okay with you,” he finished politely. His partner rolled their eyes. He was an older, fat gentleman. “I’ll answer anything,” I replied right away, forcing a smile. “Can you tell us exactly what happened?” He questioned, pulling out a phone to record it. His colleague had a pad and a pen out to write. I went over everything I knew, which didn’t feel like much. He asked several follow-up questions. No, we didn’t know each other. No, I had never been attacked before. And no, I had never been arrested. They questioned Alice, but she knew even less than me. The X-rays were done by the time the police were finished with me. We walked back in with the doctor. He put the black film onto a lighted board. “Well, Ms. Swan, it looks like you broke two of your toes and cracked the top of your foot.” “Holy fuck,” I whispered. “That was some kick, Bells,” her friend breathed, looking at the broken bones. “If you didn’t have so much padding, it would have been much worse,” he mused. “We’ll put you in a cast for two weeks before we switch you to a removable one. It won’t be that bad.” “We’d like to ask you a few questions, Ms. Swan,” the younger officer said to her once the doctor left the room for a minute. “In private,” he glanced at me and smiled. “It’ll just be a couple of minutes. We won’t bother her much.” “We’ll be out here,” Alice called to her. Nodding, she adjusted my jacket around her body. I flopped against the wall beside her door, pushing my hands over my eyes. Suddenly, I was being hugged tightly. I wrapped my arms around her and pushed my face into her soft hair. My fingers curled into her coat. “She’s okay. It’s okay,” she chanted into my chest. Sniffling, she peered up at me. She had started to cry. “Are you alright?” Squeezing her, I nodded. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m-” I let out a shuddering breath. “What the fuck just happened?” I questioned, swallowing the bile that had come up from the pit of my stomach. She shook her head. “I… I don’t know. Jesus.” She pushed her face into my shirt. I rubbed the back of her neck as her fingers twisted into my hoodie. “Why is she so fearless at the worst times? Fucking racist.” “I can’t believe she… she took him out like that.” She snorted. “She’s tough.” Alice blew out a long breath. “I don’t know if I can keep calm. I’m feeling like I’m having a panic attack. Fuck, I hate hospitals.” “Can I do anything?” Shaking her head, she finally pushed away from me and leaned against the wall. “No. Honestly, I just want to get out of here. That’s so terrible.” “I’m here. I get it. If you can’t handle it, I got it,” I swore. “Um… Here…” I pulled out my credit card from my wallet. “She’ll need crutches and a wheelchair. Could you go to get one? I don’t know where and I don’t-” “Yeah,” she grinned, taking it from my fingers. “I can handle that.” Palming it, Alice ran her fingers over the numbers. Her eyes moved over them repeatedly. “This is why we didn’t make it as a couple,” she blurted out. “I could never deal with this kind of shit. Bella needs someone, and I’m running away. How… How awful a friend am I?” “You’re not. You’re getting the supplies she requires to get through this,” I countered. She forced another smile. “I’m here, and I got this. She’s okay. Her pain levels are under control, and she seems comfortable enough.” Hugging me again, she lifted on her toes to kiss my cheek. “I’m glad you’re here for her.” “Bella literally just took care of me for the last few days. I’d be a prick if I didn’t.” Snorting, she shook her head. “That’s true, but it’s more than that, and you know it. Is there anything else I need to get?” “No.” “Call me if you think of anything else.” The officers came out. Alice pushed herself off the wall and went into the room to tell her where she was going. “Is there anything else you need from me?” I asked softly. The older cop shook his head, but the other one smiled. “Could I get a picture?” I was beyond not in the mood, but I wouldn’t tell him that. I cleared my throat. “Yeah, sure.” He pulled his phone out within a second, ready to go. In an instant, he was in my face. He held up a peace sign, and I tried to grin like I was happy to be in the hospital after my girlfriend and I were attacked by a fucking racist. As soon as he put his mobile away, his partner smacked the back of his head with a thud. “What the fuck are you doing, you mook? He doesn’t want you up in his mug. Insensitive. I am so sorry, sir. He doesn’t know how to be professional.” “No, it’s fine,” I promised. “Thank you for…” I trailed off. “Yeah. Um… So, just to let you know what’ll happen. The restaurant has decided to press charges against him for trespassing and property damage. He’ll also be charged with the possession of an illegal firearm and narcotics.” “An ungodly amount of meth,” the younger officer added, shaking his head. “And he’s being charged with assault. He’ll have a lot to talk to the judge about.” “Will we need to go to court?” “That depends,” he replied. “You’ll be notified if you need to in advance.” I nodded in understanding. We were quiet for a minute. “Is it alright if I go in there now?” “Yes, sir,” the older man replied. “We’ll contact you if we need anything else.” I pulled out my card and handed it to him. “Just to make doubly sure you have my information.” “There he is,” Alice said when I came into the room. It was bright and bubbly. “There’s your man. I’m going to get those things for you. Let me know if you think of anything else you need.” “Okay,” Bella replied. She held out her hand to her, beckoning her to come closer. She kissed her cheek, then smoothed away the lipstick. “I love you.” “I love you, too.” She pecked her forehead. She smiled sadly as she walked past me. I patted her shoulder before she left. For the first time in a couple of hours, we were alone. I felt overwhelmingly tired, and my body ached all over. My girlfriend grinned at me and reached out with her hand. Wiggling her fingers, she bit her bottom lip. I smiled as I walked to her. Taking a deep breath, I sat in a chair beside her bed. We were quiet for a while as I played with her curls with one hand and held her palm with the other. I needed as much contact as possible. “What a fine week this has been. I’m sorry. I should have protected you,” I blurted out. “Obviously, I don’t need protecting,” she calmly replied. “Obviously, my little fighter,” I agreed sarcastically. “Is there anything more beautiful than a ballet dancer kicking a racist in the balls?” I tried to joke, but there wasn’t anything funny about the situation. “Christ, Bella. He could have really hurt you, though.” Tears stung my eyes, burning my nose. I swallowed them back. “I’m fine.” The words came out in a sing-song tone. She wrinkled her nose and waved her hand with the IV in it. “We’re literally in the hospital right now,” I countered. I didn’t know if the cops had asked her the same things they had me, but he had a weapon. They questioned me about it. It wasn’t even something I considered a possibility before. She patted the top of my hand and gave me a slight smile. “I’m sedated. Everything is fine,” she reminded me. “I’m hungry, though. Think we could go to the cafeteria, or do I have to stay here?” “Where are you going on that foot? You’ve not gotten your cast yet,” I chuckled. I realized she was trying to make me feel better by joking around, too. I doubted she was. Honestly, I suspected she felt nothing much of anything at all. Bella shrugged and looked at me from underneath her drooping eyelids. “I’ll hop onto your back and ride you there. It’ll be fine.” I had to keep from snorting loudly, falling back in my chair. The tears I had been holding in rolled down my cheeks. I tried to wipe them away as quickly as possible, sniffling. “It’ll be fun. You could put me on your shoulders, but I’d hit every hanging sign and door frame on the way there,” she continued. Even drugged out of her mind, she was hilarious. I laughed a little. “I know that’s right.” I placed both of my hands around hers and brought it up to my mouth. I kissed her knuckles several times. “I’ll get you something as soon as they put your cast on, I promise.” “Thank you,” she grinned, closing her eyes as she took in a deep breath. “I feel so relaxed.” “Does it hurt?” “Only when I move it,” she answered. “I’ve broken things before. Not this bad. But I’ll be fine in a few weeks.” “I hope so,” I breathed. My girl smirked. “I’m going to be limping around like Tiny Tim for Christmas.” I scoffed loudly, shaking my head. She stuck her tongue out a little. “My favorite version of that is The Muppets one.” “I’ve never seen it.” She put her hand on her heart. “Oh no,” she drew out. The words were slurred. “We’ll have to watch it. I love The Muppets. I loved the show. It’s such a good kids movie. We can at Christmas. When I come to visit you.” “Do you still want to?” She nodded her head, smiling sweetly. I leaned in and gave her a deep kiss on the lips. “I’d love to watch anything you wish when you come.” “I’m so glad I won’t be alone for the holiday,” Bella said drunkenly. Her eyes were still closed from the kiss, but her face was in my direction. Kissing her again, I earned a little moan. “Me too.” There was a knock on the door, interrupting our moment. It was the young man from the restaurant. He had a gigantic box in his arms. “Hi… Ms. Swan?” “Oh, hello!” She murmured as she pried her eyes open. He looked down shyly for a second. “You never got your food. Um… so we brought everything you ordered, and we threw some extra stuff in there we know you liked. How are you doing?” “Wow…” she breathed in surprise. Her stomach growled loudly. Apparently, she wasn’t kidding about being hungry. “I’ll be fine. I’m starving, though. That smells amazing.” I stood up from my chair to take it from him. It was surprisingly heavy. “Thank you so much,” I told him in shock. “This is incredible.” “Of course,” he waved me off bashfully. He nervously scratched behind his ear. “But, like wow! You kicked the shit out of him.” “She’s a former ballet dancer,” I informed him. “And she’s been training for a charity show recently.” He laughed. “Nice. I found one of his teeth on the floor.” “Ew,” Bella whispered. “Well, I lost my nail. Seems fair.” She sat up in the hospital bed a little more. “Is there sauce, too?” She pointed at the box. I brought it to her to look at, setting it beside her. On top were plastic containers with green and white condiments. “Oh, my god. You are so awesome. Thank you so much.” “We put one of each of the desserts in there for you, too. And there are your coffees,” he explained. “Whelp, I just wanted to deliver this. I need to get back and help my mom clean up. There is glass everywhere.” I walked with him to the door. “Thank you,” I repeated her words and pulled out my wallet. I offered him two hundred-dollar bills and my card. “Tell your mother to send me the bill to replace whatever you need, okay? I’m so sorry.” “It’s not your fault,” he said as he looked at the money. “You don’t owe me anything.” “No… This is a tip. You’re having a dreadful day, too. It’s the least you deserve.” He grinned. “Thank you, Mr. Cullen. By the way, I’m a big fan. I didn’t know it was you until the cops told us. I’ve played every video game you’re in. Plexie is my favorite character of all time.” Flushing, I ducked my head. “Thanks. That’s fantastic. I’ll tell you a secret… He’s mine too.” He smiled. “Thank you again for bringing the food.” When I walked back in, Bella was already eating something out of a white paper bag. She dipped it in the container of green sauce. “It’s still warm. It’s so good. Do you have a bottle opener? The sodas need one.” I pulled out my keychain, which had a small one on it. She grinned. “Come sit with me, and we’ll have a picnic,” she suggested cheerfully, her drugs fully kicked in. Bella might have been a little delirious, but so was I. Thanks to Gina for proofreading!✨The next episode will✨ be on July 22nd! See y'all then! Episode Forty-nine: KickI could not believe I got that sick. I had never in my adult life gotten that ill. It was, without a doubt, the worst possible timing. It scared the hell out of me, not because I was on death’s door, but I was frightened Bella would get too freaked out and break up with me. And I had so many nightmares. She never wavered in her care for me, though. She was gentle and sweet. Whenever I awoke, she would feed, pet, wash, and dote over me as if I was a child. Perhaps I was acting like it. I laid in her bed and watched dumb stuff on the internet when I was able, but the fever made it hard to focus. It was dark when I woke up after a few days of suffering. A door had just shut, someone down the hall leaving for work for the day. When I looked over, my beautiful girl was sleeping on her couch. She was all curled up in a ball. It was so cute. Slowly, I sat up. My nose was clogged, but my throat wasn’t as sore. I went into the kitchen quietly to get myself something to drink and to take my temperature. It was back to normal. My stomach gurgled. I didn’t wish to raid her pantry, nor did I want to wake her while she was sleeping so peacefully. So I made myself a couple of slices of toast with butter and a pot of green tea. I could taste the lemon and honey in it this time. Once I finished, I ran to the bathroom to shower for the first time in days. It felt so good to scrub the salt off. The one at the hotel would have been better, but it still felt like heaven. I couldn’t wait to get back to it with her. We just had a few days left, and I didn’t want to waste them being sick. I went back into her bedroom to get dressed. She was shifting restlessly. Quietly, she moaned. “Aiden.” I wasn’t jealous that she was dreaming about him, but worried about what it meant. I had a feeling that her dreams with him were rarely pleasurable. Her face scrunched up. “Don’t,” she whimpered. Lightly, I touched her cheek. I just wanted to soothe her. Slowly, Bella’s eyes opened. She automatically sat up and yawned widely. “Would you like the bed for a while? I’m sorry.” I had been hogging it for days. “I normally sleep on the couch. How are you feeling?” She questioned as she rubbed her palms over her eyes. They dug in deep, trying to get the sleepiness out. “My temperature is normal again. I woke up hungry, so I got some toast and got washed up. I think I’ve finally slept enough.” She smiled briefly. “That’s good. Would you like to go back to the hotel today? It’ll be more comfortable for you there.” She yawned again, her eyelashes fluttering as her mouth opened in a big O. “Yeah. That would be good.” I felt terrible about all the stress I had put her through. I needed to make it up to her right away, and I needed to take care of her for a while. “Do you want to go to lunch? We’ve been cooped up for days now.” “That would be nice. We can go around noon. That would give me time to wash a load of clothes and get ready. Are you craving anything?” “Mexican, maybe? Or something like that.” I wanted something that would clear my sinuses more, and I knew she enjoyed it too. “Oh. Hm,” she drowsily hummed. “Have you ever had Venezuelan?” “No, I can’t say that I have.” She nodded. “Great. I have the perfect place.” She lifted her head when she heard her roommate move towards the front door. “Mary Alice, do you want arepas, too?” Her keys rattled as she fetched her purse. “Yes, please. I’ll meet you there for lunch. Text me when you get there.” I laughed at their cute exchange. Finally, I sat down beside her. She glanced over at me bashfully. “It’s her favorite, and it’s right beside the office.” Bella laid her head on my shoulder, her hand resting on my thigh. “I missed you.” “You were in all of my dreams,” I flirted with her. It was the truth, even if they weren’t all nice. “Were they good?” She coiled her arms around mine, gazing up at me hopefully. “Most of them were,” I lied. “I had a few nightmares, but I don’t think you can have that much medicine in your system and dream normal things. A lot of them were in color.” I held her hand, pushing my palm against hers. It was soft and so tiny. “Are your dreams normally black and white?” Shaking my head, I glanced down at her. “No... They’re normally more muted? Subtle? I just remember a lot of bold colors. Blues and reds. Too much cough syrup. I just remember a lot of the feelings in them, if that makes sense.” “It does.” She yawned again. “I’m going to run to the restroom and start some laundry. Then I’ll take a shower.” Slowly, she stood and popped her back. The couch wasn’t good for her spine. It took her a few moments and some hot water to wake up, but once she did, she fluttered around her room to get ready. Though the laptop was open and something was playing, I was watching her style her hair and paint her face. It wasn’t that cold, and the air felt nice. Bella offered to order a car, even if it was only a quick jaunt, but I declined. I needed to stretch my legs. I knew I had to push myself to feel better. With some effort, I would be back to normal the following day. The walk took us over a bridge. It was over an old train yard, and the Manhattan skyline was just beyond. Thick fluffy white clouds filled the horizon. The wind felt so good on my cheeks. I couldn’t wait to explore all of New York with her. Then I heard a little click, click, click. I glanced behind me to see Bella hurriedly taking pictures with a grin. “But I look terrible right now.” “You’re beautiful, and I want to remember this feeling,” she replied. I flushed as I looked away, unsure of what to say. It gave me hope that eased some of my fear. “You’re the beautiful one in this relationship. Especially right now,” I informed her as I held out my hand. Bella messaged her best friend to let her know we had arrived. She went to get a menu for me to study. Everything looked so delicious. Pulled pork, beef, chicken. Lots of cheese and plantains, too. There was also some type of rice and beans. Honestly, even the drink section was too much. I wanted to order everything. Maybe while filming, so I had a good excuse to be a pig. “So, what’s an arepa exactly?” “Think pita bread.” “Oh, so it’s like a sandwich,” I mumbled to myself. “Yum. What kind of beans is it?” She bit her lip. “Black beans, I believe. They’re tasty on them with the plantains.” I was lucky Bella was a patient woman. She answered all the dozens of questions I had. Somehow, she didn’t roll her eyes when I just gave up sheepishly. “It all sounds good. Pick something for me. I’m overwhelmed.” Right away, she knew what she would order for me. “Pulled pork arepa with fried plantains, black beans, and cheese. Garlic rice for a side? Let’s start with some yucca fries and some mini fried empanadas since we have to wait for Alice’s slow ass,” she concluded. It was a ton of food, and I was ready for all of it. “That sounds perfect,” I laughed at her salty words toward her friend. “Do you want a Jarrito or maybe fresh juice? I think they have passionfruit and a strawberry one. Oh, and dragonfruit. That’s new.” She made an ‘impressed’ face as she read. “What are you getting?” “A fruit punch Jarrito and a café con leche with raw sugar for dessert.” “Same but the mandarin flavor, instead.” Hot coffee was the perfect way to end the meal. I could have used caffeine, too. She touched my arm. “Why don’t you go sit down and get us a table by the window? I’ll order for us.” I would have argued with her, but I was already starting to feel drained. My energy levels would need more than a day to get back to normal. I took out my wallet so I could give her some cash to pay. “No, I got it.” I wanted to argue again, but I didn’t. She was sensitive about the issue, and I didn’t want to push it. “When I feel completely better, I’m going to take you out somewhere really nice.” I quickly pecked her cheek before going to find us a table in the sunshine by a window. Pulling out my phone, I looked at my text messages. I had told Jasper and one of my sisters I was sick, so everyone knew I was ill. Everyone was sending me ‘get well’ messages. I would save those for later. Instead, I read the one from my best friend. “How are you feeling, darling?” It was from not long before. “I don’t have a fever, so that’s better. I’m out to lunch with Bella. We’re getting Venezuelan!” “Exciting! I’ve never had that before. Tell me how it is,” he responded instantly. Smiling to myself, I missed him terribly. When I glanced up at Bella, she was happily chatting with the young man at the counter. I couldn’t really hear what she was saying, but I could tell it was in Spanish. It was so elegant, the way her mouth moved as she spoke. The boy was louder, laughing at something she said. I understood the word “Beuno!” She giggled in return. I saw a man walk in the door and go behind her in line, but I thought nothing of it. I looked back down at my mobile to send Jasper another message. “It’s got pulled pork and cheese, it can’t be bad. Also, we’re getting a ton of little fried things for appetizers.” “Oh, spoiling your lady, I see.” I chuckled. “Actually, she’s buying me lunch. And yes, I’m very spoiled.” Once again, I glanced up at Bella to check on her. She had twisted around, and her face was furious. “First of all, it says ‘Si, Habla Espanol’ on the goddamn sign, so you came in here hoping to be all butthurt, you racist piece of shit. Second, you’re willing to shove the food down your gob, but we should go back to our country? Sure, okay. I was born in Texas, and it’s lovely this time of year, bitch,” she said just loud enough for me to hear. Every word was calm. Damn, she could be scary. “Sir, you need to leave,” the boy behind the counter replied in English. He pointed towards the door. “The fuck I do. Let me speak to your manager,” the man growled at him. I couldn’t understand what happened and how it did so fast, but it was clearly escalating. “It’s his mom. So, good luck with that,” she informed him as she paid. Then she put a whole wad of cash into the tip jar to spite the prick. “Just leave. You’re embarrassing yourself.” This riled him instantly, his cheeks going red as he screamed in my girlfriend’s face. “Shut your fucking mouth, you ugly wetback. Yeah, I bet you were fucking born in Texas. Did your mama shit you out on the border?” Fuck. No. “Really fucking classy, my friend. Been wanting to use that one for a while now?” She hissed back, unfrightened. I have no idea how I got from the table to stand in front of her protectively. Something in my brain just took over, and I had to be there. “Oi, mate. The only immigrant in this room right now is me. So, if you have a problem with them, why don’t you take it up with me?” He waved me off. “I don’t have a problem with you. This is none of your fucking business.” What a piece of shit. He wasn’t worthy of licking the bottom of Bella’s dirt-covered boots. Anger filled me in a way it never has before. “Why? Because I’m white? Or is it because I’m a male? And though my partner is more than capable of destroying you on her own, I find people harassing someone I love very much my business, wanker.” The bastard didn’t give a shit what I had to say. “You speak English. If they spoke English, it wouldn’t be a problem.” “What bullshit, you racist twat.” Then there was a blur of movement. Everything happened so fast. He moved, as did Bella. She shoved me out of the way as he punched towards me. It landed on the glass case behind us, making it crack. Then my girlfriend kicked him twice before he hit the ground. She wasn’t kidding about her fight or flight. Holy. Shit. She was maybe a third of his size. “I told you she could destroy you,” I grunted at the cunt, but he wasn’t awake to hear it. The police followed her roommate into the building. Alice was confused by what was going on. The cops pushed past her. “He tried to sucker punch him! And he called me a spic. I’m not even Mexican! Dumb fucker. I’m Colombian! We have security cameras,” the boy squawked from behind the counter. His voice was breaking with the stress. Everything was happening so quickly. It’s all I could keep thinking. I looked down at Bella. Her eyes were forward, staring blankly at the wall ahead of us. It didn’t seem like she was breathing. I placed my hand on her shoulder gently. Slowly, she peered up at me. “Honey, are you alright?” She didn’t respond. The female cop got our attention while the other was dealing with the scum on the floor. “What’s going on here?” “He got mad because she was ordering in Spanish. They asked him to leave, and he became belligerent. He tried to attack me because I called him a racist. But my girlfriend pushed me out of the way right in time. And she kicked him. Once in the groin and in the face. It was self-defense. It just happened. Literally.” I kept looking at Bella, hoping that she would come out of her daze. “Ma’am? Is that right?” “I-” Her mouth hung open for a moment, then she slowly inhaled. “I think I broke my foot,” she finished emotionlessly. Alice rushed around us. “Eddie, she’s in shock.” She took her hand. “I’m her sister,” she explained to the police. “Bells, honey. Let’s sit down.” “I can feel some blood in my boot,” she informed the officer sedately. It was like it didn’t bother her at all. The woman nodded in understanding. “Okay, there is an ambulance on the way, and it will be here shortly.” Then Bella began to weave. I took her into my arms before she could fall. I rushed to take her to a chair. Placing the foot she used to kick him on the one beside her, I kneeled down to examine her. As I did, the racist shrieked crude insults at anyone in sight. “Take her boot off,” Alice instructed. I nodded, doing it swiftly. Bella’s socks were thick fluffy white except for the tip that was already saturated with blood. Gingerly, I pulled her socks off to see the damage. As soon as I did, one of her nails fell to the floor. “Oh, Jesus,” she loudly gagged. At least two of her toes were bleeding. I promptly got some napkins from the table to wipe some of it up. Her foot was swelling. “Can I get some ice for her?” The young man behind the counter nodded before rushing away to go get it. Bella trembled, her arms encircling her torso tightly. I took off my jacket and wrapped it around her. “Don’t worry, love. It’s alright now.” Her vacant eyes gazed at me. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, soaking the fabric of her shirt. Pressing my lips to her temple, I need the reassuring contact. “It’ll be okay soon.” Thanks to Gina for proofreading! Episode: Forty-eight: Night TerrorsNightmares. I had so many fucking nightmares. Stupid murder documentary. I watched Bella or Jasper get hurt in a thousand ways as we were chased through the old LA Zoo. Their screams of agony made me want to die, too. I was trembling with fear, cowering away from some unseen force. I felt as if the shadows were going to eat me. “Edward. Love. Wake up, please,” I heard Bella’s sweet voice call to me. I thought it was still part of the dream because it was so hard to open my eyes. Everywhere hurt a thousand times worse than it did in the days before. Her fingers dragged over my skin, and finally, I peeled them open. “Sweetie, you have a fever. You’re sick.” “I believe you,” I mumbled stupidly. Bella was frowning, clearly worried. Her mismatched eyes kept moving over my face. “We need to get you to a doctor. I’m going to make you an appointment for as soon as I can at a clinic, and then I’ll run to the Duane Reed next door to get you something for the fever for now.” “Okay. I have an insurance card in my wallet. Take some of the cash for the medicine,” I explained. I couldn’t even move my arm to point at it. I didn’t have the energy. “Alright. You’ve obviously got a fever and chills. What else is going on?” “I ache all over,” I said right away. That was the one thing I knew for sure. I hurt so much. She pushed her lips to one side. “How’s your stomach?” “Fine. My head hurts. So does my throat,” I noted. As if to make a point, I coughed. It rattled my chest and made a glob of mucus shoot out of my nose. “Ew, god. So much snot.” I couldn’t stop hacking. Hurriedly, she fetched me a box of tissues. Bella got the card and sat on the bed so she could look up where to call. I curled into her side. “I am so sorry,” I whimpered. Absently, she rubbed the back of my neck as she typed with one hand. “No. You have nothing to be sorry about.” After she arranged the appointment for me, she fluttered around the room for a moment to get dressed. As much as I loved her naked body, there was no reaction. I was so annoyed. At myself and whoever the fuck got me sick on my vacation. “Alright, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” she informed me as she went to go get her keycard. We had always been together, so she didn’t need it. “Did you take cash?” She shook her head. “I can get your aspirin,” she sardonically replied. “Just take the damn money, woman. I’m going to need more than aspirin,” I growled before I could stop myself. I regretted it as soon as I did. My girlfriend raised her eyebrows at me, tilting her face to the side. She wasn’t impressed, nor should she have been. I was a prat. “Oo, someone is a cranky bitch when they’re sick,” she remarked before taking it from my wallet. She held up two of the bills before shoving them into her pocket. “Sorry,” I pouted, pulling the covers over my head. I was an asshole, but too sick to be apologetic about it. But I knew I would have to make it up to her later. Within moments of her leaving to get the medicine, I fell back asleep. I wasn’t sure how long she was gone. My brain quickly started with the dreams again, colorful and unpleasant. Even in my nightmares, I realized my shivering was because I was ill in the waking world. Gingerly, Bella played with my hair to rouse me. “Let’s check your temperature, hm?” she offered in a gentle voice. I nodded, allowing her to put the device under my tongue. As it started, she wiped my forehead with a wet washcloth. She frowned at the number when it beeped. “Okay, I’m going to give you something for the fever for now. We’ve got a little while before you go to the doctor.” Only a second after I swallowed the tablets, I fell asleep again. This time, she had to be more forceful in waking me. Sitting on the edge of the bed for a few minutes, I willed my body to be better than it was. I exercised and ate fruit and vegetables. I wasn’t sure what its problem was. There was no reason to punish me. At the clinic, they swabbed my nose and throat after making me piss in a cup. The entire time we waited for the results, my girl was by my side in one of those rolling stools. She held my hand and sweetly hummed as she petted my sweaty hair. “I hope it’s not the flu,” I breathed. “I don’t want to get you sick.” She shrugged. “It’s okay. I’ve gotten my flu shot.” “So have I,” I muttered in annoyance. The doctor, an older bald Asian man with a round face, came in. “Well, it seems like it’s just a cold.” “With a fever?” Bella asked in surprise. “It’s rare, but it happens. All you can really do is get rest, drink lots of fluids, and keep your temperature under control. If your symptoms get worse or don’t improve in a few days, come back to see us again.” “There isn’t anything you can give me to speed this along?” I questioned, my voice thick and disgusting with the slime that was running down my throat. The man shook his head. “What I’d recommend is rotating doses of Benadryl and the stronger Sudafed for your sinus congestion. Robitussin or Deslyum is good for the cough. Alternate Tylenol and Advil for your temperature. Honestly, the best thing you can do is sleep and drink lots of liquid.” “Okay,” Bella answered for me. “I’ll make sure he does. Thank you.” I was furious. With myself, my body, and the whole damn world. Except for my girlfriend. She was doing everything she could to make me feel better. Because she loved me. Not that she had told me out loud. But it was the only thing that made the entire situation even slightly bearable. Shivering, my arms hugged my chest. This was a different kind of cold. It wasn’t as chilly as it had been in New York. This came from the inside, tightening my muscles until they burned with pain. I glared out the window of the taxi as we rode back to our hotel. “Can I take you to the apartment so I can make you soup? You can sleep in my bed, and I’ll take care of you,” she suggested softly. Slowly, I turned to look at her. Some of my anger slipped away. “Soup?” She was trying so hard for me. “That would be nice. I’m not really hungry right now, but I should eat something soon. But we can just order. You don’t have to cook for me if you don’t want to.” “Homemade soup is better for you when you’re sick. And we’ve been eating nothing but take out the past few days. We should eat some real food,” she countered. I slowly nodded before glancing back out the window. “I am so angry right now. We had plans,” I whined. She gently reached over and touched my knee. “It’s okay. We all get sick.” “But... I don’t want to waste this time with you. I don’t have all that much, and then I’m not going to see you again for ages,” I continued to whimper like a pouty child. Bella rolled her eyes. “It’s like three weeks.” “Ages,” I repeated before sniffling. Trying to smile at me reassuringly, she squeezed my thigh. “You’re so dramatic, Eddie. Look, I’ll baby you for a couple of days. I’ll feed you eight kinds of soup and then you’ll feel better because you’re twenty-five and healthy. You youngins bounce back from this kind of shit pretty quickly. It was bound to happen. You’ve been working all the time. You’ve been traveling.” “I guess so. I can barely keep my head up right now,” I complained as I pressed my face against the cold glass. It felt so soothing, but it was utterly disgusting. I would make others sick. “I know. Let’s go get some stuff, and then we’ll go back to my place. Yeah?” “Yeah,” I breathed softly. When we returned to the hotel, Bella packed the bags we would need, shoving some of my comfortable clothes into my backpack with all the medicine she bought. She wouldn’t let me carry much. Normally I would have been offended by it, but it was probably for the best. I was leaning against everything to stay upright. My entire world was swimming. When I flopped onto her twin bed, I curled up into a little ball. She put all her covers over me before adjusting the temperature in the room. She gave me a full range of medications. Pills, liquids, salves. Bella held the glass for me with a straw, so I didn’t have to sit up. “Drink the whole thing,” she urged, kneeling beside me. “There you go,” she cooed, petting my forehead. “You’ll be okay in a couple of days, I promise.” I knew she was right, but my brain thought I was going to die. Instead of croaking, I fell into a deep and uncomfortable sleep. My mind was a hellscape of colors and sounds. Vibrant, sharp, painful. It was like being at a club I couldn’t escape. I hated it. The feelings of dread overwhelmed me, drowning me in cyan and crimson. Someone ran their thumb over my bottom lip. When I opened my eyes to see who it was, I realized it was Jasper. His hand was dripping in something slimy black. I could feel it oozing on my skin. When he pushed two fingers into my mouth, I choked. “Take it, darling,” he grinned evilly. I woke up coughing, my chest on fire. The apartment was dark and quiet, only the hum of the heater in the room echoing around me. It took a few minutes to catch my breath. Pushing myself off of the bed, I went to look for Bella. I wanted to make sure she was alright. My dreams left me uneasy, and I needed to see her. Then I heard talking in the kitchen. It was Alice, her voice soft. “It’s okay to be worried. These are valid feelings. But you’re going to take excellent care of him. You already are,” she said patiently. “Thanks, Doc,” Bella snapped. I had never heard her use that tone before. It was hard to describe it. “Anyone could empathize with why you’re scared right now, Bells.” She drew in a ragged, pained breath. “Oh, you mean because my very healthy husband dropped dead buying us breakfast? And now the fact is, the man I am probably falling in love with has a cold, has brought on a panic attack.” Her words all came tumbling out quickly together, her distress obvious in her voice. Bella had been so calm and sweet to me earlier in the day. I would have never realized how anxious she was. “Are you falling in love with him?” Her friend inquired in a hushed whisper. It hurt me for her, but I was glad she did. I wanted to hear more about that, too. “I don’t know, but I’m obviously freaking out right now,” she spoke emotionlessly. “Maybe it’s just because he’s the first since Aiden.” “Maybe. What do you think?” I could hear her draw in a quick breath as if she was about to cry. “I’m not sure I’m ready for this. For him. For this relationship. What if I can’t handle it? I don’t want to hurt him, but I’m too broken for this. I should just let him go.” My hand went to my mouth, and I closed my eyes. How could I beg her not to even think that way? She wasn’t broken. Maybe damaged, but I didn’t care about that. She could never hurt me. The only thing that could… was if she left me because she felt like she wasn’t good enough for me. Because that’s what it was, I realized. She lacked confidence in herself, and it scared her. I had seen it manifest itself in so many small ways when we were together. And I fucking hated it. It was the one trait I wished I could fix about her, but not for me. For her. “If you’re falling in love with him, why would you want to end it? He clearly has strong feelings for you, intensely so. What benefit is there to it?” “I don’t want to end it, but he deserves-” “No. He gets to decide that. It’s not about him, it’s about what you think you deserve. This is your anxiety. I don’t think you’d be reacting this way if you didn’t care deeply for him. Look, I think you need to go talk to someone who isn’t me. Like, seriously. It’s becoming a problem. The money, now this,” her friend pushed. “Yeah. Set me up with someone you trust,” she finally responded after a long minute of silence. Alice really was on my side, I realized. All she wanted was Bella’s happiness, no matter what that looked like for her. She believed my relationship with her closest friend was the best for her and was trying to preserve it for me. I was extremely grateful to her. And very dizzy. My stomach gurgled, reminding me I hadn’t eaten since the night before. I decided it was for the best to pretend as if I didn’t hear a damn thing. For the moment, anyway. It would give me plenty to think about for a very long time. I stumbled my way into the small white galley. “’Ello. Can I have that soup now?” Bella stood from her seat instantly. “Of course. Come sit down. Do you want some hot tea to go with it?” She immediately became my nurse again. “Yes, please,” I responded with my woozy head against the wall. My eyes rolled over to look at Alice. She gave me an apologetic smile. “What kind would you like? I have chicken broth, vegetable broth, chicken and vegetables with rice and pea soup,” she elaborated. I wondered how long I was asleep. Her roommate offered me the pen she was smoking from. I stared at it for a second. I couldn’t feel worse than I did, and I wanted my brain to shut the fuck up for a minute. But my hit was too big, and I almost hacked up a lung after. “Ugh. Um. The pea soup, I guess.” “I want the pea soup as well.” “I put the oil pens in your purse. Alice, if you’d like one...” I offered. I figured Bella might need something to relax while dealing with my cranky ass. She got up wordlessly, leaving us alone in the kitchen. “We probably shouldn’t share because of germs.” I was likely spreading the plague everywhere I went. Absently, my girl shook her head. “You’re really unlikely to get sick from mouth-to-mouth contact.” “Really?” She nodded, not looking at me as she got a glass from the shelf. “Generally, cold germs are spread through hand-to-hand contact, then touching your nose or eyes. Especially your eyes. So we could share a fork or a cup and probably be fine. Anyway, if I’m going to get sick from you, it’s too late now.” She brought it to me once she filled it with water. “Drink that first. You’re dehydrated from all the medicine. Alice, get my chapstick from my purse for him,” she shouted the last sentence. One day, she would be a fantastic mother. I just hoped it was to our children. “Does that mean you can still kiss me?” I flirted, wanting a little reassurance. I couldn’t tell her I was eavesdropping yet. “Mm, I could, but I’m going to say not right now because you’re covered in sweat,” she teased. “I could use a shower.” “Can you stand up that long?” “I kind of doubt it.” “After you eat, I’ll draw you a bath. Then I’ll get you some more medicine and put some Vapor Rub on your chest to make you more comfortable. And I’ll wash those clothes for you tonight,” she said in a rush as the kettle whistled for the tea. She was having trouble keeping her mask on, her strain starting to show through. But Bella quickly got it under control again. When she brought me the mug, I put my hands on her hips so I could pull her closer to me. I laid my head against her, just wanting to cry. Everything hurt, my body, my brain, my emotions. It was too much. All I longed for was a nice vacation with the woman I was in love with. I should have spent the day wandering New York City, not fearful she would break up with me because a minor illness understandably overwhelmed her. She played with my hair soothingly. “It’s definitely time for more medicine.” I glanced up at her slowly. “Thank you for being so wonderful to me. I don’t know what I would have done without you.” “You would have gotten NyQuil, gone to sleep, and ordered soup when you were ready for it,” she smirked a little teasingly as she touched my face with her smooth fingers. “Do you want bacon and sour cream on your soup?” “I do,” Alice declared as she passed me the chapstick. She also had two of the pens. They were different strains. “How did you get these through the airport?” “I took a private flight, so you don’t go into the airport. You go directly to the plane,” I grumbled as I smoothed it onto my chapped mouth. It burned like a motherfucker. “No bag checking.” Bella quickly turned to look at me. “You took a private plane?” “It was cheaper,” I said vaguely. It already felt like bragging to mention it, and she was obviously uncomfortable with the money. I didn’t want to add to her uneasiness. She blinked. “I don’t know if I believe you.” “You would be surprised,” I replied before I coughed into my elbow. It took a minute to catch my breath. “Next time I come, if there is anything you want, let me know.” Her friend grinned. “Thank you! Oh, my gosh. Edibles. Please.” “I think I can arrange something. Get you some of those disgusting little gummy bears. Or one of those sodas.” I would get her the biggest gift basket of THC infused whatever if she could convince Bella not to leave me. I would get her high for years. “What a time to be alive,” she remarked sarcastically as she blew out a long billow of smoke from her peach lips. Then she winked at me. My girlfriend set two bowls in front of us before going to get a plate with strips of bacon and a tub of sour cream. She kept finding more stuff to bring to the table. Spoons, napkins, drinks. Finally, she poured herself a bowl of the green soup and sat down with us. Alice gave her the pen to take a hit. She was worried about her friend’s stress levels and had purposefully given her the one with the more relaxing strain. The food was wonderful, despite the fact I could barely taste anything. It was creamy, and the bacon was salty. It made my throat feel a little better. Once I was nearing the end of my bowl, she got up to prepare the bathroom. She warmed it up with the heater while starting the water. “Here,” she mumbled as she passed me the thermometer again. “I’ll get you some more medicine.” It felt strange to undress in front of her and slip into the bathtub. She was trying her best to take care of me, washing my hair before covering a puff in some shiny pink goo. All I could do was lay my cheek against the edge as I watched her, my head too heavy. “I’m glad you agreed to talk to someone about your anxiety. I’ve been worried,” I blurted out suddenly. She paused for only a second before moving it along my skin. Bella blinked. “Heard that, did you?” “Yeah, as I was coming in. I wasn’t eavesdropping purposefully,” I admitted. I didn’t want to tell her how much I heard, though. But I wanted her to know I would support her with it. If she needed help, I would do anything. Flushing, she peered absently down into the water towards my feet. “It’s okay. I’m sorry that I worried you.” “You didn’t worry me. It did. The anxiety.” “Well, I’m sorry it worried you. I’m realizing that I might not be very good at handling this on my own and that I don’t have to. I’m just now realizing it because I am terrible at taking my own advice, obviously,” she joked as she washed my arm. The bubbles gathered on my skin before sliding down. Every once in a while, I caught a whiff of fake strawberries. “I’ll do whatever I can to help. Just tell me,” I implored. She smiled before pressing her lips to mine. “Thank you for taking such good care of me.” Her soapy fingers moved over my cheek. “It’s just because I like you so much.” She was scared because she loved me. And it was breathtaking, in both wonderful and terrible ways. I needed to show her how much she meant to me… when I was better. “I know,” I grinned. Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Forty-seven: FerryBella had taken her hair down, and it whipped around us as we boarded the ferry. There were only a few people, and most of them looked bored and tired. They were going to work. She took my hand and led me to the balcony so we could see it properly. The sky was already starting to turn purple. It wasn’t as cold as it had been the days before. I was more prepared, even if the long underwear made me sweat my ass off in the club. My girl was chilly, though, not that she would have mentioned it. Wrapping her in my coat, I pulled her close to my chest with my arms around her back. She peered up at me, a small smile on her face. Bella seemed so content. I leaned down and kissed her sweet lips that still tasted like coffee. “I had so much fun tonight,” she declared in a breath against mine. “I am so glad you could be here for it.” “Me too,” I grinned. Dragging my nose across hers, I lost myself in the softness of her skin. I was still tipsy enough to be relaxed. “I like your friends.” “They like you, too.” “I’m so glad you’ll get to meet mine. Jasper will love you. My sisters, too,” I sighed in happiness. “It’ll be exciting. I haven’t been to Australia since I was a teenager for a school trip,” she answered. “We went to Sydney for a week.” I pressed my lips against her ear. “I’ll have to show you a really good time.” The Statue of Liberty came into view. Everything was glowing orange behind it. “Wow,” I breathed. “Do you want to take a picture with me?” She questioned in a sweet voice. “Absolutely,” I grinned in answer. First, I took several on my phone before we switched to hers. I held it up in the air because I had such long arms. The light behind us was so beautiful, but it was nothing compared to her smile. She had me kneel in the last few so she could press a kiss to my cheek then lips. I sent one of them to Jasper on the cab ride to the hotel. Bella had her head on my shoulder, her fingers dragging up and down my thigh as she did. With every pass, they would go lower and closer to my half-hard erection. “Stunning view, darling,” he replied right away. “Are you staying up all night partying?” “I only partied for the first part of the evening. Then we went to eat and took a ferry ride. We’re heading back to the hotel now.” “Did you have fun?” I grinned to myself. “So much fucking fun. We danced for hours. Oh, lol and a guy who looked just like you hit on me at the club. He had an American accent, and it was a little unnerving.” “So, you’re saying he was sexy,” he joked. I chuckled softly. Bella could read my conversation on the phone as I typed. She was smirking. “He was! But he didn’t have that stupid fucking mustache.” He sent a picture right away of a closeup of said stache with his middle finger up in the center. The words ‘u r a cunt’ were in white lettering in the middle of his forehead. Bella giggled softly. I slipped my phone into my pocket. “I am a bit of one to him. I hate his facial hair so much.” “Why?” She questioned, scrunching up her nose. “Because it’s part of a character he plays and not who he is. I don’t like it. I like the real him.” She shrugged. “It’s just hair.” “I realize, but it’s what it represents. He started growing it after a nasty breakup, and the bigger it gets, the more he’s hiding his feelings.” Bella made her eyes wide, looking away knowingly. “Ah. So, he was appeasing the personal crisis gods?” I laughed at her way with words. “Exactly. But it’s been a while. I guess he likes it. I just always imagine him without it. I don’t know, maybe it’s me.” We got out of the car and walked into the already busy hotel. I could feel eyes on us as we did. A few tourists looked at me as if they recognized me, but said nothing. Bella didn’t notice. She pressed the button to the elevator as she gripped my fingers. We were shoved into the corner with a ton of other people. Her back was squeezed against my chest, and she held my hands as she leaned into me. She kicked off her heels as soon as she came into the room. “Ow,” she whimpered quietly. I scooped her up into my arms after she got her coat off, so she didn’t have to walk. Giggling, hers went around my neck. “You’re so sexy in this,” I mumbled as I marched towards the bedroom. “I’m so gross right now. I need a shower,” she answered as she undid the top buttons of my shirt. Instead of dropping her off on the bed, I took her into the bathroom. Carefully, I sat her down onto the vanity. She crossed her leg over her knees, leaning back on her hands. I went to flick on the water for us. I returned to her and freed her tie from its Windsor knot. She went back to the buttons on my shirt. Her lip was between her teeth as she watched her fingers. When she pushed it to the floor, I tossed off my undershirts too. Her cool palms went to my bare skin. The smell of sweat filled the space. She pressed her nose to my heart, deeply breathing me in. “I love dancing with you. I’ve never had a romantic partner who was a good dancer,” she informed me as she undid the buttons of my trousers. “The way your hips move against mine is so sexy.” Chuckling, I flushed at her compliment. I worked on her shirt next. As I moved my way down, I could see the red lace of her bra. “It helps when you’re hammered.” Giggling, her head fell back a little. “Yeah, it does.” She pushed the fabric off her shoulders and onto the counter. She reached behind her and popped the hooks on her bra so they could come free. Running her fingers over her bare skin, Bella’s nipples hardened at her own touch. Then she hopped off the countertop to her feet to remove her pants. She looked me over, her eyes moving from my toes to my wild mane. “Wanna fuck around in the shower?” I shoved my trousers to the ground, adding it to the huge pile of clothes. Eagerly, I followed behind her. We crashed so hard. She was asleep within seconds of her head touching the pillow. She was naked and still slightly damp from the water. Her hair was sticking to her skin as she laid flat on her belly, not even bothering with the blanket. I pulled it around both of us, lying on my side close to her with my hand on the small of her back. My dreams were wild. We were at the club, but I couldn’t hear anything. I could just feel the beat in my body. The neon-colored lights were frantically moving around our heads. In the center of the dance floor was Jasper. I felt so drawn to him. Suddenly I was standing in front of him, and he was taking my hands. He placed them on his hips as we danced together. He was grinding on me like Bella had. I pressed my body against him, his back to my chest. My fingers explored his own over his clothes. They slid down his stomach. One of them kept going until I palmed his erection. The crowd parted as my girlfriend walked towards us. She danced with us with Jasper in the middle. My hand was on her hip, pulling her against him and his hard-on. He kissed her neck, both hands moving over her breasts. She was wearing the same sexy suit. In my dream, I wanted to be alone desperately with both of them. We were covered in sweat, and I wanted to feel their own drip on my bare skin. The beat got harder, my heart thumping in my ears. Jasper tilted his head back and kissed me on the lips. Soft, wet, warm, I felt on the edge of ecstasy. Bella’s fingers grasped me through my slacks just as his tongue slid over mine. When I woke up, my girl was curled around me with her hand on my balls. She was dead to the world, and her mouth was hanging open. I laughed a little to myself and carefully moved it. Almost right away, she tried to put it back where it was. It made me snort. Turning over, I wrapped my fingers around hers to hold it. She smiled as she pressed closer to me. She pecked my nose. With her cheek on mine, I fell back asleep. When I woke up again, I felt like shit. My stomach was gurgling, and my whole body hurt. The day before, I had been sore when I got up because of all the fucking, but this was worse. Bella was waking up beside me slowly, yawning and stretching with her arms above her head. Sitting up, she sulked when she looked at the clock. “Damn.” “What?” “We were supposed to do something today. It’s like six, though.” I stretched and popped my back. “Whoops. We can do it tomorrow. It’s okay,” I promised, touching her thigh. “I’m hungover as fuck.” “Aw,” she pouted. She nodded her head and pushed her hair out of her eyes. “Yeah, me too,” she admitted. Bella glanced over her shoulder as she pulled one of the sheets up to her breasts because she was getting cold. “Netflix and chill?” “Yes, please,” I replied with a grin. “Room service?” She got out of bed and went to get the menu for us. When she did, she also got the oil pen for us to share. Taking a big hit, she blew the smoke out in a long stream. Bella stole one of my button-down shirts from my luggage after passing them both to me. I took a little drag, watching my beautiful girl get dressed. It went down to her calves. She twisted her curls into a wild bun. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. “Why don’t you get your laptop? What do you want to watch?” She questioned, crawling back into the bed. “Oh. I don’t know.” I gave her the menu so I could do what she asked. I hurried to my bag to get some underwear, picking up my computer. “What are you thinking about eating?” Bella flipped open the book, biting her bottom lip. “Mm… Cheese,” she mumbled to herself as she ran her fingers over the words. “Cheese? I like cheese,” I remarked drowsily. She allowed me to pick a movie from my list and was happy to indulge me. I just selected the first one I hadn’t seen before, Blade Runner. It had been on my ‘to-watch’ list for a long time. She laid her head on my lap, smoking while we waited for the food to arrive. I hoped as I woke up that I would start to feel better, but I was disappointed. Maybe stupidly, I decided the hair of the dog was just what we needed. I poured us each a glass from a bottle she got me for my birthday. Since I chose first, I insisted she picked the next one. I wasn’t surprised when she selected a documentary about murder. What shocked me was that I was enthralled by the end. “Okay, your turn,” she said as she refilled my glass once it was done. I put on another with a frown. “I hate it, but I need to know what happens next.” We watched all the shows. There was no justice in the finale. My mouth hung open as the screen faded to black. “What the actual fuck?!” I demanded angrily as I got up to throw away our second bottle of wine. “So, that motherfucker got away with it? Seriously? Clearly-” I growled brokenly. “They protected him simply because he was a man. And they treated her like she was insane because-” “I know,” she smirked at me and sighed. “If there had been a proper mental health care system in place to begin with, they would have seen that she was a victim of long-term abuse. And how the police handled it! It’s just so fucking careless. It can’t be that way when people’s lives are at stake.” She let me go on for way too long about it, pacing around the room in front of the bed. A pretty smile spread over her face, her knees were drawn up under her shirt. “I wish there was something that I could do.” “Well, you know there are charities for all those things.” “It’s not enough, though.” I could always do more. “You’ve already given more than the average person does in a lifetime. Don’t stop now, of course.” I shook my head. “Money is one thing, but look at how much time you’ve put in. Rosalie was telling me at the show that you helped Alice more than anyone with CfA and that you’ve given thousands of hours to help her. She said you put your career on hold to help Alice get started and that you gave her a lot of the money she needed.” Her smile disappeared as she got more serious. “Aiden did that. And she got most of the money she needed from her dad when he died.” “You were married. That was your money, too.” Bella quickly shook her head. “Not really. I did help her get it started. Worked in the office. Me and Rose were her first leaders. It’s taken years to get it to this point. I’m glad Alice is so business smart because she’s just grown this thing to crazy heights. I don’t do as much as I used to, obviously, though.” “Alice told me you did five big trips just this year and that you’ve done over thirty-day trips. Sometimes doing three or four a week,” I replied, thinking about one of the many conversations I had with her at Thanksgiving. She had brought it up casually when we spoke about Culture for All. “To be fair, one trip was overnight, and another was two nights. I did do the long two weeks one this year. We went to Mexico. They needed translators. And, most of those day trips are only two hours long. It’s not entirely out of the goodness of my heart. I do get paid something,” she countered. “Twelve a bloody hour. Is that even minimum wage here?” It wouldn’t even be enough to motivate me to get out of bed. She pouted at being called out. “No. It’s fifteen, I think.” “I thought not.” Lifting her chin, she squared her shoulders. “But I do get pictures which I can make money off of. Nothing I’ve done will compare to the money you can give. I can see you in twenty years donating the kind of money that eradicates diseases. Or builds schools. Maybe make your own nonprofit to focus on whatever you care about.” She was right. I loved the idea. We snuggled into bed again, my arms around her. Gently, I petted her curls. “Now that’s a goal to work for. I’m glad I know someone who has experience starting a successful charity.” “I’m sure Alice would be happy to help,” she said a bit sarcastically. Rolling my eyes, I ignored her. Instead, I kissed her lightly until Bella fell asleep with a smile on her face. Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode!💛Hi, y’all!💛 Due to unforeseen circumstances (my children getting off of school for a full month at least unexpectedly because of a ☠plague☠??? Sure wasn’t on my radar in January…) 📷Imperfect Pictures and Perfect Snapshots📷 is going on hiatus after this week. Imperfect Pictures will return June 1st with episode 132, and Perfect Snapshots will return June 3rd with episode 48. I won’t be going away completely, though! A Change in Direction will continue to update on Thursdays, and Key will update on Tuesdays and Fridays! (Except for planned breaks on April 13-17 to prepare for my eldest birthday and May 25-29 for my anniversary.) Luckily, I’ve already gotten those chapters to my proofreader! To keep up to date with news and schedules, please join my Facebook group, where I also have teasers for every chapter. And the best way to keep up with new chapters is email alerts, so don’t forget to sign up! (Remember to check your SPAM folder if you didn’t get a confirmation email!) 💛💛Thanks for being awesome!💛💛 ~Jeska  Episode Forty-six: Buy a DrinkIt took a few minutes to get out of the theater, Demetri locking up behind us. There was a large group, all of us mismatched perfectly. It reminded me of going out with my friends in Sydney. Maybe a little quieter and less drunk. Most of my girl’s companions were older, though, and probably at least somewhat more mature. “Tacos!” Alice shouted when we turned the corner after walking a few blocks. “Ooo. I love these.” “Oo,” Bella hummed in agreement. We were holding hands as we ambled down the empty sidewalk to the club that wasn’t too far away. She glanced up at me. “Hungry? I only had a slice for lunch.” “I had some pizza, too,” I smiled. Great minds think alike, but everyone was eating pie in New York City. “Yeah. You know I love them.” “Have Bells order it for you,” Emmett said over everyone’s head. “They always do it better when she does.” “Why?” I asked in a laugh. “She orders in Spanish, and she looks Mexican, so they try harder,” Alice answered for her. Bella looked at her and scrunched up her nose. “Plus, she’s hot, so they flirt with her with extra food.” She threw her head back in laughter before playfully twisting her braid around her finger. Then she cocked it to the side. “Hola! Extra queso, por favor,” she teased in a high-pitched voice. Then she looked down at her chest. “It only works when they can see down my shirt, though.” “Girl, you bad,” Emmett laughed, swatting her shoulder. “No, but can you order for me? It always comes out right when you do it.” Even in the darkness, I could see her eyes roll. “Yeah. What do you want?” “Cheese-crusted bean burrito with extra cheese.” His wife made a disgusted face. “What?” Bella ignored them, walking ahead of the crew and taking control of the situation. It was obvious she was an alpha and didn’t mind being the boss. She looked perfect for the role in her tight outfit. It made her ass look so good. “Hola, Mami!” A young Latino man said as he hung out of the truck window when she approached. “Dope suit. Hambrienta?” Grinning, she put her hands in her pockets. “Gracias. Yeah. Mmm…” She tilted her head to the side. “Un carne asada y a Jarritos, por favor. Puedes…” she paused. Bella was thinking hard about something. Finally, she shrugged. “Cheese-crust a burrito?” “Yeah, Mami,” he smiled at her. “Meat or Frijoles?” “Frijoles, extra queso, por favor.” He winked at her, pointing his tongs at her. “Un minuto. Let me get that started.” Her brother-in-law looked so deflated. “I could have done that,” Emmett complained. I chuckled. Demetri pushed up to the front to study the menu. “But you didn’t. Chicken or beef?” He questioned Bella. She just shrugged. “You’re not helping. Tell me what I want.” My girl leaned back into me, tilting her head to look at my face. “What do you want, honey?” I grinned at the opening. “A kiss,” I answered, leaning down to peck her lips lightly. She smiled, holding onto the back of my neck with her gloved hand. “And I’d like two of the pork with the pineapple and a Jarritos, too.” Her mouth formed a little ‘o’. “Can I have a bite?” “Of course,” I cooed as I stole another kiss. Music was playing as we waited for our food. The girls playfully danced and sang along with it. Bella took Alice’s hands, and they twisted and spun around each other. They were both very hyped up from their performances. It was an old Britney Spears song, and my girl was definitely leading. “Damn, and I’m all out of ones,” Emmett quipped dryly as he crossed his arms over his chest. They didn’t even slow down. “Bitch, you can’t afford this,” Alice sassed as her head fell back so she could look at the starless sky. “They’re so mean to you,” I laughed. It made him chuckle warmly. “You like it, don’t you?” Shaking his head, he smirked. “Obviously,” he sighed, rolling his eyes. The place was packed with people. The music was so loud. I had never been to a gay club before. They were playing ‘It’s raining men,’ as we came in, the version by one of the Spice Girls. All of my sisters adored them. Demetri turned around and began dramatically lip-sync to it as he hung off his husband. “I’m buying the first round! Shots for everyone!” He came back with Jack for everybody. We all slammed it down. My girl didn’t even grimace. I loved whiskey, but it still made my eyes water. “I’ll get the next round!” Bella said with a big smile. “More JD or something else?” “Tequila!” Alice shouted at her, putting her arms up. She had a huge, shit-eating grin on her face. “No!” she responded instantly in the driest tone. “Fireball?” Rosalie got very excited. I could see what she was like in uni. “Yes!” I bought the next round. And then Rose wanted more Fireball. Everyone just kept purchasing more. It didn’t take long for it to get to me. I couldn’t understand how my girl was still standing, but she didn’t seem bothered at all. I was so much bigger than her and could handle my liquor pretty well. Demetri grabbed my girlfriend’s arm. “I want another dance!” I was nursing a beer, and she had half a drink. There were a few left on the table from people dancing. “I’ll watch these. I’ll get the next one,” I winked at her. She smiled and kissed me on the cheek. I could smell the cinnamon lingering on her lips. Riley was sitting across from me, watching our partners go. He was probably the quietest and most reserved of the group. “I’m so glad he has someone to dance with tonight. I hate it.” Softly, I chuckled. “I love it. I can’t wait,” I admitted. Then I felt something on my shoulder. A guy was behind me. “Um, yeah, mate?” He smiled, looking my face over. “Hi, I’m Tom. Can I buy you a drink?” I automatically laughed nervously. “Uh, no. Thank you. I’m with my girlfriend tonight.” He walked away without saying anything. Riley raised his eyebrows and shook his head. “The gay hookup culture is so toxic and rude. I’m glad I’m done with it. At least say something before you tuck your tail and run away.” “I wonder if it’s the same in Australia,” I mused, taking a big gulp. “None of my close friends are gay there, so I don’t know. I’ve met a lot more since coming to America.” Sipping his drink, he shrugged. “Well, Hollywood is filled with them. New York, too.” “That’s true,” I agreed. “My manager is a lesbian. She’s active in the community in LA.” “Nice!” He grinned. Then his eyes got wider as he peered over my shoulder. “Oh, incoming.” I turned and looked to see what he was talking about. Just behind me was a very handsome blond man with curls that hung over his forehead. His big blue eyes studied me like the other guy did. He resembled Jasper so much… without his stupid mustache. It stunned me. “Hi there,” he said in a deep voice. His accent was Midwestern American. “How are you?” “Hey. Fantastic,” I responded instantly. He took a sip of his drink then grinned at me. “Are you here for the afterparty, too?” I nodded in answer. “Were you in it? You look familiar. Sometimes it’s hard to tell with all the makeup and costume.” For some reason, I was a little dazed by him. My cheeks heated as I swallowed. “No, no. Um, I’m an actor, though.” Quickly, he nodded in understanding. “Awesome!” He praised me. “Have you been in something I’ve seen before?” “Uh.” I was stuttering a lot. I laughed and cleared my throat. “Well, maybe, but I’m mainly a voice actor.” He bit his bottom lip, just like Jasper did. His eyes raked over my body. “Mm, that makes sense. You have a very sexy voice. Can I get you another one of those?” He pointed at my bottle. I realized instantly if I had been single, I would have said yes. I had no idea what to do with that information, but I shoved it to the back of my brain and blamed it on the liquor. “No, thank you. I’m actually with someone.” “Lucky guy,” he smiled before pouting for just a second. “I am,” I replied. Bella was pushing through the pack towards me. I finished my beer in one go. “Thank you for the compliment, though. It’s very flattering.” “You’re welcome. Have a good night,” he said before he winked at me. Then he turned to go back into the crowd. He filled out his Wranglers really well. Riley leaned in again. “He might have been okay. He was hot.” I smirked nervously, glancing at him. “I think I just figured why some chicks enjoy going to bars. This is amazing for my ego,” I mumbled in return. He chuckled. “Oh, my god. Buy me a beer and call me pretty!” He continued to snicker when they finally got to us. I innocently smiled at my girl. She didn’t notice I was being stupid. If I was tipsy, she was already drunk. “Your boy got hit on twice while you were away,” Riley told her with laughter still in his voice. He was trying to cause trouble. “You’re just mad I’m getting hit on more than you,” I sassed. His husband threw his head back and cackled meanly. He pouted at his reaction until he got a kiss on the cheek. Bella leaned in, grinning at them. “I’m not surprised. He’s sexy as fuck,” she declared before winking at me. She finished her drink, throwing her head back to do so. Then she held her hand out to me. “Come dance with me.” She tugged me along to where her friends were dancing. A new song came on as we did. Bella instantly turned and ground against me. My hands automatically went to her hips, drawing her back into me hard. She pulled me into a quick kiss with her hand on the back of my neck, forceful and sweet with her liquor. This was the kind of dancing I wanted to do with her at the club the night of the jump. If she had moved like this against me, I really might have dragged her off to the roof for a good fucking. Or at least that’s what my alcohol-fueled mind imagined. Alice was close to us, so she pulled her over so they could dance while Bella still twisted against me. They were very handsy with each other, neither shy. There was no way my girlfriend didn’t notice my arousal. My threesome fantasies came in full force. Us and her best friend, or with mine… And she was definitely encouraging them on purpose. I knew Alice didn’t want me, and I would never endanger my relationship with the woman of my dreams. But it was fun to dance with them. When the song changed to a bouncier one, they each took one of my hands and jumped around as they giggled. Rosalie hopped over to them. They were so cute together. They were laughing and so happy. “This is amazing,” Bella breathed with her head against my shoulder. Her eyelashes fluttered, her lips parted. I couldn’t resist her mouth, and I didn’t have to. I kissed her deeply, earning a soft moan as her fingers twisted in my hair. “Again,” she sighed against them. I honestly had no idea how my girl was still upright. My brain was swimming with our booze. The lights swirled around us, the music blending together. Kisses and sweat, dancing, and grinding. It was almost overwhelming. There was a reason I never did harder drugs than pot. “Shit, I’m hammered!” Rosalie shouted at her sister and Bella. Alice nodded vigorously, making my girl giggle. “Let’s get out of here! I’m hungry.” She looked at her wristwatch. “Go get Demetri and see if they wanna get something.” Riley jumped at the chance to leave. He had been ready for ages. The women led the pack, taking everyone to a quaint diner. We took up the largest booth meant for a big family. They were one, though. It was fun to observe all of their interactions. And they were all so welcoming to me. We stayed for hours, snacking on the perfect hangover killers. “Al.” Demetri took her hand as he leaned over the table after everyone said goodbye to her sister and husband. We were still faded, and Rose looked as if she was about to fall asleep at the booth. “Do you want to have a sleepover?” “When?” she inquired, looking at her watch. “Right now,” he laughed. “You can come to our place, and when we get up, we’ll order food.” She pursed her lips. “That would save me a trip tomorrow. We left so much shit in your office.” “Oh! Can you get my stuff too?” Bella asked. “I forgot about my flowers.” “Yeah,” she responded and shrugged. “Yeah, okay. That sounds like a good idea. I’m ready to go whenever you are.” “Great,” Riley mumbled, then yawned. “I’ll pay, and we’ll get out of here.” We said goodbye to them, and it left us alone for the first time all day. She smiled at me, her eyes so warm. She sat down across from me after she got up to hug everyone. I took her hand because I needed to feel her skin. “Shall we go back to the hotel?” Peering down at our joined hands, a small smile crept over her sweet face. “Do you want to take that ferry ride I was telling you about? It’ll be sunrise soon.” “I would love to.” Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Nineteen: Holding Out on MeOnce again, I was left alone early in the morning so that Bella could prepare for the show that evening. I felt a little tired and sore from all of our fun, so I was happy to have the time to sleep in. I took some aspirin when I got up. We had spent most of the night fucking in the most obscene ways, and my shoulders and back hated me for it. It was worth it. So, instead of going out to purchase clothing, I bought it online and had it delivered to the hotel. It was incredible how quickly they could get stuff to me. Money was such a helpful thing. Jasper sent a few messages asking about the day. I texted that it was amazing and to call me when he had a chance. I smiled when it rang just a moment later. “Amazing? That’s all I get, you wordy bastard?” I laughed. “Honestly, it was better than that. I don’t know how many details you want.” “All of them. What did you do?” “Well, we waked and baked and had mimosas and breakfast in bed. Then we ran to a sex shop where I went bonkers. Just nuts,” I chuckled. “I spent so much. Bella was trying to get me to open up, and I don’t think she was prepared for it when I did.” He snorted. “What did you get?” “Clothes, shoes, lube, bondage gear, and a half a dozen vibrators. Tons of random shit. I think I embarrassed the hell out of her, but she humored me.” Jasper hummed loudly, then laughed. “Bondage? I hate to inform you that blindfolds don’t qualify.” “Hey!” I grunted. “Actually, we bought a kit. And clamps. And she picked out a riding crop and a collar.” I cleared my throat as I blushed. “Cuffs, too. She really liked those.” “So did you just spend all day smoking weed, eating, and fucking?” “Yup, pretty much.” He sighed softly. “Oh, you lucky cunt,” he mumbled in annoyance. “I need to get laid.” “I thought you got laid the other day!” “But it wasn’t all day birthday sex.” I scoffed. “That’s true.” “What are you doing today?” Jasper questioned, changing the subject. “Bella is performing at that charity show, and I’m going to support her. Then we’re going to a club afterward to the afterparty. This is one I’m looking forward to. It’ll probably be a lot of fun.” “Aw!” He responded cheerfully. “Well, that’s nice, darling.” “Oh!” I remembered something. “I have stuff to tell you.” He was quiet for a long minute. “Oh?” “Bella’s coming to Sydney with me! You’ll get to meet her! I’m so fucking excited. She agreed last night.” I chuckled happily. “I was talking to my Grandpa Alistar over Facetime, and that shifty old bastard flirted with her, brought it up, and then abandoned me when he realized I hadn’t asked her yet. But it worked out.” “Oh! Cool!” He remarked. “In February?” “Yup! So, what are you doing right now? I don’t suppose you want to help me plan this extra-special romantic trip for Bella before then? Since you’re so good at it.” He had helped me with pretty much everything at least a little. He always had such wonderful ideas. “I want to take her on a quick snow holiday around Christmas.” He laughed quietly at my sucking up, then cleared his throat. “Um, I’m off right now.” There was a pause. “So, sure. Yeah. I’ll help, mate. What do you need?” I hummed for a moment. “Where the fuck do I take her?” We worked until I got too hungry. I let him go to get ready, going to a pizza shop not too far from the hotel in my new layers. Beside it was a florist. They delivered, so I sent two roses with a handwritten message to tell the ladies to break a leg. Bella was pretending she wasn’t nervous, but I could tell. They were just a little something to encourage her before. I also purchased a beautiful rainbow bouquet in a variety of colors to give her afterward. When I arrived at the theater, Riley, Demetri’s partner, found me. He waved me over to his group of seats. “Oh! She will love those!” He said as he placed his hand on his heart. “I hope so!” He pointed to a seat. “This is yours.” Rosalie was already sitting down with her husband. “Hi, man! Welcome! Join us!” Emmett greeted me loudly, shaking my hand. “Thank you!” I took my spot beside the gorgeous blond, putting the flowers on my lap. “So good to see you again.” “Did you have a fun birthday?” She questioned, lightly touching my arm. Her smile was pleasant and slightly knowing. I chuckled softly. “It was splendid, thank you. I got to spend it with Bella.” “Aw,” she grinned then pouted out her full lips. “That’s sweet. She was so happy on Thanksgiving! It was nice.” “Yeah, it was nice to see,” Riley agreed as he sat in the seat beside me. He shook his head. “She was walking on air. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen her this happy, to be honest.” Rosalie cocked her head to the side then shrugged. “There were points with Aiden, but I think she’s more stable and healthy now, so it makes a difference. Her anxiety is better than it was. She’s slowing down and relaxing.” “As much as she can,” Emmett chuckled. He leaned over to look at me. “I used to think she had ADHD. She still might, she’s just better at handling it.” “No, it’s the anxiety,” Rosalie mumbled to him in a whisper. “And what her grandmother did to her.” “What do you mean?” I questioned. Bella didn’t talk about the woman who raised her often, but it was always loving. I think they forgot I was there, and I didn’t know all the stories they did. The blond licked her lips then glanced over at me, considering everything she wanted to tell me. Then she huffed. “That bitch straight-up abused her. She was what I guess you’d call a helicopter grandparent. They would wake up every day at four in the morning and from then to the moment they went to sleep at ten that night, she had her work. She studied, read the bible, practiced her music, cooked, and cleaned. That witch treated her like a slave and would beat the crap out of her if it wasn’t perfect. Did you know her mom started her in gymnastics when she was a toddler, and she was so good at it she got scholarships? Won tons of shit. After she died, that cow rode her so hard to keep it up that it was making Bella a wreck. When she quit, she hit her with a belt until she bled and grounded her for months.” “No,” I breathed. “Bella would call it tough love,” Emmett remarked as he shook his head. She scrunched up her face in disgust. “She wouldn’t want to speak ill of the dead. But I will. I despised that woman. I hated her so much. So did Alice. She used to give our mom shit for being divorced, too.” I felt sick to my stomach. “Did she really beat her?” Looking down at her hands, she nodded. “Her back and thighs used to be covered in tiny scars. Mama took her to a lot of spa treatments to get rid of them. She hid the worst with tattoos.” I realized then that Alice and Rosalie were both honest and blunt women who would tell anyone the truth if they felt they needed to hear it. No matter how brutal. Slowly, I wiped my hand over my mouth. “No wonder everyone is so worried about me giving her new scars. She’s already had a lifetime of them,” I said to myself before I shook my head. “She’s really gone through a lot, hasn’t she? I feel like I’m just now starting to understand how much. She is so damn strong.” “She’s been to hell at least three times,” she told me in a serious voice. “The next time she’s there, it better be because her fine ass is there to take over, not because someone else dragged her through it.” I laughed at her words. “No worries. I’d protect her with my life if I had to. Bella is such a kind-hearted and strong-willed woman. I would never do anything to harm her. Every day I am just blown away by her goodness. Like this.” I pointed my hand towards the stage. “I love this. This is exactly something I would do. I admire her dedication to her charity work.” “She’s always wanted to make the world a better place.” “Me too.” Her husband leaned over again. “I think besides Alice, Bella has probably put in more hours than any person I know,” Emmett added into the conversation. “She used to do twelve-hour days in the office when Al was starting up. She was the first one I met when I started at CFA, actually,” he chuckled. She looked disgusted again. “He hit on her. She was bent over cleaning, and he complimented her ass.” “Am I never going to live that down?” He questioned his wife, pouting at being called out. I snickered at him. I couldn’t blame him for liking it. It was a fine one to be sure. “You said, ‘Hey mama, nice ass!’” Riley looked at him and snorted. “Who thinks that’s a good idea? Ugh, straight people. You were doing charity work!” “Uh, a horny twenty-something?” He answered, then shrugged. “Hey! She thought it was funny!” Rosalie rolled her eyes, ignoring him. I chuckled. “I have to admit, there is something about her charity work that does things to me. So, I don’t blame you. Also, her ass is legendary.” He winked at me. “She is dedicated,” Riley mused. “You know that Al considers CFA as much Bella’s as it is hers? She put up so much of the money to start it and has worked more than any other leader. Alice told me she’s over ten thousand hours logged, but you know it’s more than that.” “Damn,” Emmett breathed. "It’s because she does all the long trips.” “It’s incredible that she just gives her time away like that.” He quickly nodded in agreement. “Well, as a volunteer, you get twelve fifty an hour. So, she gets a little something,” she countered. Her husband leaned over to continue the conversation. “Not in the beginning, though. It was only after Aiden died that she started accepting it. Usually, she just gave it back.” “She put everything on hold to help her, too.” Rosalie shook her head, frowning. “I think her career would be in a different place if she hadn’t. I know she doesn’t regret it, but I think it upsets Al. She feels guilty when she watches her struggle financially. She’s still paying off the bills Aiden left her with.” I wasn’t in the least bit surprised at anything they said. The lights chose that moment to dim. Just a second later, Demetri came out onto the stage wearing a bright bubblegum pink princess style ball gown. “Wow!” I declared in surprise. Riley looked over at me in a smirk. “That is pink.” “It’s his color,” he replied. “It looks good on him.” He smiled and nodded happily in agreement. I chuckled quietly. I didn’t know what Bella was doing in the show besides the ending. She would dance, but other than that, she hadn’t given me many details. So with every act, I became a little more excited, hoping to see her beautiful face from just a few rows back. I hadn’t ever seen a girlfriend in a thing like this before. I was usually the dramatic one. Something like a tune from a music box played after Demetri came out in his third outfit. This one was a tux. The area was dark behind him. “Dance is where I fell in love with the stage,” he announced to the audience. “Just like so many other kids out there. But I knew that I was different. Just a bit of a rebel.” He passed off the mic before the lights turned up. Bella was dressed as a ballerina with her leg bent back behind her. Demetri held his hand out to her, and she seized it so he could pull her off the platform. The song changed to one I recognized but didn’t know the name of. It fit his speech perfectly. My girlfriend had told me she took ballet as a teenager and that once she came to New York City, she continued to take classes to help her try to get roles. She downplayed it, though. She acted as if she was terrible, and that was part of the reason she quit. I had never seen anyone move like that so close up. It was like she was telling a story with her body. Every motion was clean and perfect, sharp, and to the point. She worked amazingly with her partner as he spun her around the stage until he ripped off her dress to reveal a black one underneath. Demetri threw her around like she was a feather. I could see her gymnastic training in the way she landed in a proper split after one of his flips. When the song ended, she twirled her way back to the platform. The whole packed audience cheered wildly for her. I clapped and stood to my feet, as did everyone else. There were wolf-whistles and catcalls all around us. “That was incredible!” I breathed in wonder. Rosalie leaned in. “Bella wanted to take ballet when we were kids, but her grandmother wouldn’t pay for it. So, Alice convinced our mom we all wanted to, and that we needed her to do it with us. Isn’t she great? I always loved watching her.” I did something I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t help myself. I pulled my phone out and sent a message to Bella. “You have been seriously holding out on me,” I informed her, adding a bunch of stupid emojis to go with it. I felt giddy from just watching her, my heart beating a million miles an hour. “I told you I was a dancer. Thanks, but I’m not that good.” I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “But, like... You’re a legit dancer. Like you have real moves. Ballet moves.” I didn’t know how to word my feelings. They were overwhelming me. “You are so so so sweet and biased. I stopped dancing seriously a decade ago, and I’m rusty as fuck. I’m so sore. I might be dying right now, actually. Like legit. My chest.” She sent a funny gif of a man grabbing his breast like he was having a heart attack. “lol You did great though,” I promised, grinning to myself. I sent a whole rainbow of hearts. An hour later, the show was wrapping up. Demetri came to the stage again in his tux. Bella was standing behind him in her own suit, but it was very feminine. It was fitted to her body and so sexy. Something in my brain just misfired and kind of shut down when I watched her. I didn’t even hear what her friend was monologuing about. Watching her expertly play while looking like that made me melt in my seat. And then she sang. “Wow,” I whispered to myself. I saw Rose nod in agreement. “Why isn’t she on Broadway?” “She’s not as confident as she pretends to be,” she replied. “That’s why you have to encourage her every step of the way.” I just nodded in understanding. It took forever to get to my girl. There were so many people trying to get her attention. When she finally saw me through the sea of bodies, she threw herself at me. I caught her easily, lifting her feet off the ground. She giggled cheerfully as she kissed my cheek. I put her down, appreciating the view close up. “You look incredible.” “Yeah, this queer groomsman’s look ticks so many boxes for me,” her blond friend agreed, giving Bella a tight hug too. She looked pleased with herself, slipping both of her hands in her pant’s pockets as she averted her eyes to the floor. “Oh, I should skip the dress next wedding then? Demetri has such good taste.” “Those shoes are everything,” his husband added, looking at her feet. I hadn’t even really noticed how high her heels were. They made her almost four inches taller. “I bet you can’t dance in those.” Glancing down, she shrugged. “I used to be able to. But it’s been a while. So, I guess we’ll find out, won’t we?” Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode!I'm taking a vacation! The next episode of Perfect Snapshots will be on March 11th! See you then! 😘💛 Episode Forty-four: PicturesWarning: this episode contains graphic sexual descriptions. Reader discretion is advised. Intended for a mature audience only. (18+)I thought my smile would split my face in half. “Yeah?” She nodded in answer, her grin so bright. “I’ll prepare everything. I’ll make it perfect. I promise.” “I can’t wait,” she replied before she stood up from the bed. Coolly, she arranged her camera and brought it back to me. “This one will be good to start with. I like it for indoor lighting. It doesn’t zoom, so if you’d like to do that, I can switch it to another. I also have another that’s better for close up detail. I have all my lens with me and filters if you want to experiment.” “You are so casual.” I slowly took it from her. I was actually nervous. She didn’t seem bothered at all. Bella smirked at me seductively. “I’m excited to be honest.” “I don’t know where to start. I don’t know how I want you to pose,” I admitted, looking down at the device. She shrugged. “The best pictures aren’t posed. Just take the camera and take a picture when you’re ready. When you see something you like or want more of, tell me,” she explained, turning to go over to the table covered with all our fun purchases. She searched for a moment before she found the shoebox. Bella didn’t look behind her as she took off her robe and tossed it carelessly onto a chair. Everything about her was perfect. The corset made her waist narrow, her body a flawless hourglass. Her ass was just… “Damn.” She turned, shimmying so that it jiggled her breasts before glancing down at the tempting mounds. “If I looked down, I’d get my nose stuck.” It was too cute not to take a photo. She giggled, shocked. Her hand flew to her mouth, her cheeks full with her grin. She was even more adorable than she was sexy. I laughed and swiftly took another. She was glowing in it. “Okay, I like that one.” She said nothing as she unwrapped the box. I decided I wanted some from a different point of view. I sank down onto my knees, quickly taking more. It still wasn’t the right angle, so I sat back and tried once more. Bella noticed my displeasure with how it was going. She leaned down and flicked something on it so that the viewfinder popped up. “That will put the picture on the screen, and you can turn it so you can see it from other directions. And you can press the screen to take a picture as well.” Using her instructions, I placed it on the ground so that the shot went right up her legs. It was exactly what I wanted. She was a great teacher. “Yes, that helps. Thank you,” I said lightly. Spinning around, she shook her ass again so that it wiggled almost in my face. She flirtatiously gazed over her shoulder at me. I snapped shots as swiftly as I could. These looked like something out of a fashion shoot. “I love your bow tattoos,” I mused as I touched them. Kissing each, I let my lips linger there on her delicate flesh. I no doubt needed a close-up of them and her ass. She looked so good, I wanted to take a bite out of her. When she felt my teeth against her skin, she eeked and giggled. I quickly took a photo of her smile. She was having fun, too. “Shall I put the shoes on now?” “Mm, yes, please.” I continued the entire time she put them on. She did it in such a way that it was unmistakably a show. With her ass in my face, she bent over to slip one on, and then she kicked her foot up to put on the other. When she straightened up, she glanced over her shoulder at me before walking over to the glass door. “So, do I look silly?” Not even close. My girl looked like a model. “I think you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Lean against the door,” I requested quietly. The frost was making a halo around her, and the colors of the city were perfect on her skin. The way she looked at me was so sensual, her thumb between her teeth. Her hips raised off of it, her breast pushed out towards me. “Turn your head to the side.” She did what she was told, and a streak of blue light fell over her red lips. Her blue eye reflected it, shining brightly. Her eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks, her expression sultry. I wanted her so badly. Everything about her was so luscious. Cool and collected, Bella pushed off the door and turned on music for us to listen to. She had liked my instructions earlier, so I continued. “Sit in the chair.” With her eyes on mine, she sat down gracefully. As if she was about to have tea with me, she placed her hands on the arms and tucked her feet underneath like a princess. But she was more than that, I realized. Pecking her knuckles, I held her gaze still. “My queen.” Laughing, her cheeks turned pink as she looked away from me for a moment. “What are you trying to do to my ego?” She said mockingly in my accent, mimicking my action from the Zucker’s kitchen with her hands. “I worship you,” I told her honestly. With her eyes on mine, she pushed the tip of her shoe into my chest and shoved me back gently. I grabbed it, kissing the very top of her ankle. I rearranged her legs, knowing exactly how I wanted to take the next pictures. Spreading them, I hung the other over the arm. She knew precisely what I was doing, adjusting in her seat. Teasing me, her fingertips slid from the inside of her knee almost to her panties. “Is this what you want?” She really had no idea. “Yes.” Kissing her thigh, I pushed them further until I could see that she was visibly slick. I took dozens of pictures, moving her around in different poses for more. She did everything I wanted eagerly. “Go to the bed.” Her body swayed temptingly as she went to sit on the very edge of the mattress. She rested on her palms, her warm eyes inviting me over. Standing, I continued to take photos as I drew closer. Bella smirked as she pulled my shirt from my trousers. “Lay back.” Stretching out, I rested on my knees over her so I could capture her expression. She allowed me to change her position in whatever way I pleased again. I touched her stomach, feeling the rough material under my fingers. “You are perfection.” Resting her black heel on my shoulder, it gave me the perfect shot of her leg. Going back to the end of the bed, I grabbed her by the ankle and yanked her towards me. She went to her knees on the floor in front of me. With a wicked little giggle, she peered up at me hungrily. Bella undid my trousers, but I knew the night would go faster once they were off, and I was still having too much fun. Grabbing her jaw, I made her look up at me before taking a photo. She pecked at it, holding my gaze. I was getting too tempted and needed to pull back. Going across the room, I looked through her kit. “Which one is the one with the zoom?” “The two longer ones at the very end of the bag. Get the shorter of the two.” After the exchange, I went to the chair she had sat in before. “Take off the corset. Slowly.” I didn’t like strip clubs, but this show was something else. And so much hotter. Without her eyes leaving mine, she freed each hook one at a time after she stood up. She let it drop to the floor, her hands smoothing over her stomach and breasts afterward. “Turn around. Shake your hair loose,” I directed. She did so, knowing exactly what I meant. “Perfect. Look back at me.” Bella peered over her shoulder, her lips parted slightly with desire. “Now your panties.” Hooking her thumbs into them, she pushed them down her thighs before throwing them aside. My girlfriend then turned and came towards me. I knew if I touched her, I would lose my cool, and I wasn’t done yet. I needed just a little more. “Lean against the glass again.” She did everything I asked so smoothly. Resting against the door, her head rolled back for a moment as her fingers moved between her legs. I could see her wet fingertips sliding over her skin. She was so turned on and was just as ready for this as I was. I put the camera away. “Come here.” Bella did quickly, and I pulled her to me so I could lavish her breasts with attention. She played with my hair, tugging on it gently. It reminded me of how she did when I tasted her. I realized I needed to eat her like this. Carefully with my hand on the back of her ankle, I put her foot on the arm. It opened her up to me completely. With only her heels and stockings, it was the sexiest thing I had ever seen. I slid my fingers over her bare skin. “You’re always so wet for me.” I would never get enough of her flavor. She was the most delicious woman in the world. Whimpering, she held on to my hair just like I wanted her to. Bella shook with my touch, calling out as I brought her over the edge for the first time for the night. First, but not last. When I finally stopped, I looked up at her with a proud grin. She was slightly flushed, but her face was totally relaxed. She put her leg down before picking up her camera and walking smoothly over to her bag once again. I didn’t know how she could be so calm after. Changing her lens, she didn’t look back at me. “Unbutton your shirt.” I grasped then what she was doing. It was only fair she got to snap her pictures, too. Bella said she wanted some as well the day before. Watching her, I undid each one slowly. She had given me a show. Hopefully, she would like mine too. Her head tilted to the side slightly. “Stand up and take off your pants.” My jeans caught on my big feet, and I almost fell over while pulling them off. I felt my face turn red as I hurried to free myself from them. She was still taking my photo, though, but I really couldn’t understand why. I was so awkward and uncomfortable in my own skin that I wasn’t sure what she could like so much. “Turn around,” she ordered in a firm voice. I did, my cheeks flaming hotter. “Take them off now.” After I did so, I mindlessly touched myself. It was so hard that I was aching, and the pressure was exactly what I needed. All I wanted to do was pump furiously, but I would finish in a matter of moments if I did. Bella put her camera down before striding confidently over to the table so she could look at our purchases. Arranging them, she pulled things from the bag. Finally, I came up behind her so I could lightly kiss her neck and shoulders. “Hm, what shall I use on you first?” She said nothing, a naughty smile on her face. I let my fingertips move down her shoulder before I reached for the handcuffs. Bella allowed me to bind her, her grin turning into a small smirk on her pretty lips. I held her waist so that my erection dug into her ass, tasting her soft skin from behind. Next, I picked up the blindfold. I took her to the bed and had her climb onto it so that she was sitting on her calves. There she waited, bound and helpless while nude with a giant smile on her perfect scarlet lips. They were parted slightly as she panted, her chest heaving. She was having as much fun as I was. Quickly, I grabbed her face and kissed her delicious mouth. Before, I didn’t want to mess up her makeup, but it was exactly what I needed. I could feel the red smearing between us and spreading across my skin. When I pulled away from her, it was smudged slightly around the edges. It just made her sexier. Gazing at her, I knew I needed to put a ball gag in her exquisite mouth before the end of the night and see if I could make her scream around it with the aid of as many as toys as I could. I wanted to see how many I could get her off with before she couldn’t take anymore. The answer was three, which was more than I was expecting. We still had two more to try. It was, without a doubt, the most incredible birthday ever. The things she allowed me to do to her were like something out of a porno. It was the greatest gift I have ever been given. Taking those pictures were… I let my mind wander while getting dressed after. It felt as if I was floating on air. When she came out of the bathroom after cleaning up, Bella was wearing one of my shirts, and it went to her shins. Her wild curls rested on the top of her head, piled up in a haphazard bun. Her skin was clean, and her lips pink and slightly swollen from being kissed so much. Startlingly, her eyes got huge. “I just realized I haven’t given you your gift yet.” “That wasn’t it?” I jokingly asked. I knew she had a present, but nothing would beat naked photos. She giggled softly, rolling her pretty eyes. “No. Of course not.” Scampering to her suitcase, Bella retrieved a bag. She hurried back over to me, a grin on her eager face. She plopped it onto my lap heavily before leaning in to kiss me. “Thank you,” I breathed against her lips. She grinned as she leaned into me, her temple resting against my shoulder. She looked so small, almost young, this way. “Happy birthday, honey.” My girl looked up at me, her mismatched eyes glowing. “Are you having a good day so far?” “The best, obviously,” I answered right away. I couldn’t wait a moment longer before opening the gift. It was heavy on my thighs, and I had no idea what my girlfriend would get me. The very first thing on the top was little snack cakes. “Oh, I remember you talking about these,” I chuckled. It wasn’t was I was expecting. “For a video, of course,” she said with a nod of her head, playing with the ends of the long sleeves of the shirt she was wearing. Her fingers were barely peeking out, most of it pushed up to her elbows. Bella had pulled her legs into it, and her toes were hardly showing. “Oh, nice! Maybe this can be our dessert?” I offered. She looked at me in surprise. “Do you want to make a video tonight?” “I think that’s a pretty awesome backdrop for a video, don’t you? I mean, if you want to,” I added the last part quickly. I wanted to create one to remember the night by, and it seemed like a perfect excuse. Grinning, she inclined in and pressed her lips to my cheek. “Of course. Sounds fun.” I continued to take things out. She had it packed. “Let’s see what else is in here. Oo, wine. Yes. Very nice. We should put these in the fridge for later.” “They should pair very well with our Drake’s,” Bella joked slyly, wrinkling her nose. “Maybe we’ll order some milk to have with them,” I replied, knowing how much she loved it with sweets. The next was an old-fashioned shaving kit. It had soap, a brush, cup, aftercare lotion, aftershave, and a heavy silver razor with several replacement blades. “That’s more a gift for me,” she cooed as she kissed my cheek again while her little fingers danced across my jaw lightly. “I love how smooth your skin is.” “Oi, very fancy,” I replied before I pulled out an object that was very well wrapped. “Let’s see what we’ve got here. It’s something all bundled up.” It took a few moments to unearth. “Oh, it’s a Plexie clock! How fun. I’ve not seen this one before.” I had most of the toys for him. People were always sending me pictures of them, too. She looked so proud of herself. “That’s because it was handmade by someone local. I found it at a comic book shop not too far from here. They had all kinds of good stuff. There is one more thing in there,” she finished before pointing to the gift. Carefully, I put it down to the side and pulled out the item that was at the very bottom. It was heavy as hell and felt as if it was made from metal. When I unwrapped it, I discovered it was a large Plexie statue. It was at least eight inches tall and was a perfect replica of my character in its standard armor. It was all scuffed up as if it was battle-worn. There were even little bullet holes. “Yo, it’s so detailed!” “You can pose it,” she explained as she moved the statue’s metal arm up and down. Its front panel popped open just like in the game. He was basically a sarcastic mule. “I know how much you like your shelf, so I thought I’d get you something for it that is one of a kind.” I loved it so much and would cherish it for the rest of my life. It was so cool to receive something that was custom. I kind of wanted to cry, but I held it in. She couldn’t know how special she had made my entire day. I kissed her to show my gratitude because I didn’t have adequate words to do so. “Thank you. I was expecting more lingerie.” Bella impishly grinned. “Oh, you’ll get to see those soon enough. But it’s like an advent calendar. You get a new one every day,” she teased against my mouth. “That sure as hell beats lollies.” Then my girlfriend sang like an angel with a devilish grin on her face. “On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a pair of crotchless panties and a teddy. On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a bra-sized thirty-two triple D!” Honestly, Jasper was just going to love her, too. She was quick, though. He would have trouble keeping up with her. “You are so weird, and I adore you,” I chuckled as I promptly hugged her to me. “I love everything you got me. It’s been the best birthday. I’ve never been so happy,” I confessed. “Thank you.” “You’re welcome, handsome,” she answered. “Now, are you ready for dinner? I am starving.” “Me too,” I agreed, hopping up to arrange my gifts neatly, so they were safely off the bed. As I did, I passed my girl the weed and my phone. “Get hungrier, I’ll fetch us a drink. Pick out some options for us.” Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Forty-three: YOLOGlancing around the shop, I leaned down to whisper in her ear. “Those shoes are perfect. How can you walk in them?” Bella looked up at me, her eyebrows raised as she smirked. “Practice.” She paused for a moment, looking me over. “I intended not to wear those for very long, either.” Best. Birthday. Ever. As we walked back to the clothing, I had to keep myself from grabbing her ass. She wouldn’t have minded, but I didn’t need to get us kicked out of the fun shop before we made our purchases. Searching through the corsets again, she went for the most Christmas-like colors first. She skimmed through the reds and whites before coming to a selection of green. I stood behind her, looking too. Then one caught my eye. It was deep emerald and had silver details sewn into the thick fabric. The buttons were little paste diamonds. It reminded me of her engagement ring. “I like this one. Do they have your size?” I questioned softly, biting my lip. One day, I wanted to see her in this and my ring with maybe the heels and nothing else. “Mmhmm.” She grabbed the correct one from the rack. It had matching panties attached too. “I love these colors.” Smiling, she trailed her fingers over the silver looping. “The green reminds me of your eyes.” Quickly, I leaned down to steal a quick kiss. It was innocent and sweet, just a peek. She brought her hand up and pulled me down for another one, brushing her nose against mine when she drew away. She tugged away and flicked her little finger towards a display with different Santa themed items. “Are you sure you don’t want a hat?” Her smile was impish and playful. “Perhaps a bow,” I joked. If she was going to be my present, she needed it. We made our way towards another wall. This one had a selection of BDSM type toys. There were probably twenty different styles of collars. Bella took one from the hook that was a deep satiny red. “Or, that.” The idea made me flush a color to match. She put it with the shoes and corset as she gazed into my eyes. I couldn’t look away. “I know you enjoyed spanking me. Are you into BDSM?” That was a good question. I liked certain ideas though I hadn’t done many of them. I more than enjoyed spanking her. That evening had become one of my favorite fantasies to think about when I was alone. “I’m not really experienced.” Gazing at me knowingly, she smirked. “That’s not what I asked.” Bella looked away from me and glanced at the other toys. “Have you tried anything else?” “Tying up and blindfolding. I realize it’s not really hardcore,” I barely breathed out. It felt as if the words got caught in my throat. “Not everything about BDSM is hardcore. It’s not like I’d expect you to have hogtied and hung someone in a gimp suit from the ceiling while hitting them with a cane and calling them dirty names.” I wasn’t sure if she was just throwing random phrases together to create a situation or if she was remembering an event. “That is so specific it’s concerning,” I jested, hoping it wasn’t real. She smirked again at my expression, shaking her head so that her hair fell around her face. “I’ve never hung anyone from the ceiling or even seen a gimp suit in person. I’ve definitely done some hitting and name-calling, though,” she explained as she reached for one of the toys. It was a riding crop. She twirled it in her fingers for a moment before tightening her grip around it. Then she popped her palm with it twice while looking me straight in the eyes. My brain went ‘OoOooOoo, Yes, Mistress’ right away. I grabbed it from her hand and went to add it to our loot, but she stopped me with a laugh. “Ah. No. Not that one. It has a rubber end. You don’t start with that,” she said as she retrieved a better one. She really was more experienced than me because I had no idea there was even a difference. Then Bella picked up a pink one with a star that looked like a wand. “I’m the BDSM fairy, and I’m here to fuck you up right,” she teased in a sexy voice, wiggling her eyebrows and tapping the star onto her palm again. I laughed too loudly. “Kinky Godmother,” I quipped. Wriggling her shoulders, she timed her taps to her words. “Bip-di bop-pi-di bondage, baby.” I realized then that Bella would be the perfect teacher for me. She was as patient as she was funny. And she was enjoying herself too. There were several beginner’s BDSM kits. I picked out the most expensive one, figuring that would be the best quality. It wouldn’t do if the handcuffs broke the first time I tried to cuff her to a chair. Then I turned to see the shelf with lube on them. I had forgotten to pack any. I wasn’t sure exactly what we would do, but having that just in case was never a terrible idea. She picked up a tube, bringing it close to her eyes. It was bright yellow and looked like chapstick. “What’s that?” “It’s supposed to make your nipples tingly in a fun way.” I reached over and took it from her, making her giggle. “Do you even like pineapple flavors?” “Yes,” I smiled innocently. Beside them were some warming massage lotions and oils. I loved the idea of dripping it all over her body and rubbing her from head to toe. I grabbed two of those too. She bit her lip as she watched, and I realized she liked it as well. When we got to the dildos and vibrators, I felt her stiffen up beside me, and her face was flushed. It was kind of cute to see her almost nervous about something. She hummed, walking to a box and pointing at it. “I’ve heard good things about this kind.” I instantly put it in with the rest of the haul. “Seriously, stop just grabbing,” she laughed, amused as her blush brightened. I smiled wickedly. “Why not? It’s my birthday, and I can buy whatever I want,” I stated like a bratty child. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. Leaning in, she whispered. “Though that is true, you’re just having fun picking out all the dirty things now. Look how much junk we have.” I pick out a single thing that was only for her, and suddenly it was too much. No, I meant it when I told her I would buy her a bunch to try. “I fail to see a problem here. We said we’d test them out tonight and see what you like best. We can’t do that if we don’t have a wide selection. You need choices.” Bella giggled as she looked away from me, her arms wrapped around her stomach nervously. “I was joking about that part.” I leaned down to kiss her ear before whispering in return. “Well, I’m not.” Looking up at me with her wide innocent eyes, I saw her arousal and surprise. It was delicious and made me feel more confident. As I looked around, I caught one sales lady's attention. She hurried over, smiling brightly. “Hi. Can I help you with anything?” Clearing my throat, I smiled in return. I could pretend to be an adult not made nervous by women’s sexual aids. “Actually, yes. What are your best-selling toys for women’s pleasure? Top five.” My girlfriend’s eyes got as big as saucers as even her ears turned neon. She slowly brought her hand up to her forehead, facepalming at my stupidity. The pink-haired girl didn’t notice, though, and smiled. “Well, if you’re interested in this style, I would recommend this brand right here. It’s a little bit cheaper, and it also has a spot for regular batteries, and it’s USB rechargeable. It’s one of our top-selling,” she helpfully explained. I grabbed her selection. “Are you just looking for this style?” “No, looking for new, fun things to try.” She walked over to a shelf. “So, these suction ones are really popular. They are… very fun, um,” she giggled. “All the girls at the shop have a favorite. This one is the best-selling overall.” I grabbed it, too, following her to the next section. “Also, the rabbits are always popular.” Bella’s horror was hilarious in a way I couldn’t describe. She would let me do whatever I wanted, and I kept picking things out until the pink-haired woman took my basket behind the counter. I still brought more stuff in my hands. “I’m going to look at the shoes again,” my girl grumbled when I went to pay, making me chuckle. There was a display of candles that turned into massage oil after you burned them. They were even edible. I got one of each flavor. “The cherry is delicious,” the lady commented to me. “Oh, I like cherry,” I agreed, pulling out another just in case I really liked it. “Okay, wow. Well, your total today is $2335.98. I believe that is the most I have rung up. I mean, there is more expensive stuff in the store, but we rarely sell it,” she explained in a rush. I laughed at her expression, some of my confidence coming down from the high of shopping. “Um, yeah. Might have overdone it. It’s my birthday, though.” She beamed. “Happy birthday! Yolo, right?” I nodded, signing the receipt. “How old are you?” “Twenty-five.” “Nice! I’d tell you to have fun tonight, but that won’t be a problem as long as you don’t forget the batteries.” We walked together hand in hand down the very crowded Manhattan streets. It was just as bitingly cold as before, but I tried to ignore it. “Um, we need to stop to get batteries,” I commented through my chattering teeth. “Oh, there’s a Duane Reade right by the hotel. We’ll stop there. Is there anything else we need?” Apparently, what we required was candy, chips, cookies, and booze. Bella also picked out a little bow choker from a Christmas display. I smiled to myself. I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket as I unlocked the door with the keycard. It was one of my grandparents, but I wasn’t sure which. Hurrying, I put the bags on the table before I pulled out my mobile. My grandmother was requesting some Facetime. “Oh, it’s my Gran,” I informed my girlfriend. She smiled and nodded. “I’m going to get freshened up,” Bella replied as she went searching through our loot. She took out several things before turning to go to the bathroom. Finally, I answered. I put on my biggest smile. “Hello there, you gorgeous woman!” “There is my beautiful baby on his birthday!” She cooed happily when I came onto the screen. Her eyes were too close, and I could see up her nose. “Happy birthday to you,” she sang, and I felt like my chest would burst. I put my hand on my heart, feeling the emotions stinging my nose. I missed my grandmother so much. “Thank you so much!” “Have you spoken to everyone today?” Bella stood and watched, leaning against the bathroom door as I chatted happily. “Mum called. The girls sent me lovely messages. And I talked to Nana last night, but you were the only one to sing me a happy birthday. They all tried, and I told them no. Only Grandma Jane can do it right, I told them all,” I joked, making her laugh. When I looked up again, my girl was shutting the door behind her. She leaned back in the frame. “Are you having a good birthday so far?” “Yes. It’s been great. Relaxing… except for talking to Mum.” “Poor babe,” she teased. No one was a huge fan of my mother in my family. “What have you done?” “Well,” I chuckled awkwardly. “Um, I got up early and spoke to Jasper. He made me a lovely picture.” She nodded her head. “Such a talented boy. How is he?” I frowned, shaking my head. “I know you miss him, darling. It’s okay.” “Today, especially,” I admitted. “I know he’s unhappy. Why won’t he let me help him?” “Because men are stubborn and have to do it their own way. Anyway, tell me what else you’ve done? It should be mid-afternoon there if I planned it right. I didn’t want to bother you too early or late.” “It doesn’t matter when you call. I’ll talk to you anytime.” “I know, darling,” she cooed. “So, what plans do you have?” I laughed at her persistence. “This morning we had room service with lots of champagne, and we just got back from doing a little shopping. Today is a big shopping holiday in America.” “They must have known it was your birthday,” she teased gently, making me laugh. “They sure did,” I agreed. I kicked off my boots and threw off my jacket to get more comfortable. “We just went to a couple of stores though because it’s bloody cold. I’m going to go tomorrow when I have some free time to get some better winter wear. I packed terribly. Perhaps I’ll order it and have it shipped to the hotel.” She nodded her head. “Packing was never something I’ve done well either. I always forget something.” “Me too. Thank God I’ve got the money to indulge the way I do. Bella doesn’t particularly like it, but I enjoy spoiling her.” My grandmother smiled brightly. “Bella is such a lovely name. Is she there with right now?” “Yeah,” I grinned. “She’s getting ready for tonight.” “Going out?” “Yeah,” I lied, smirking a little. “You know me, a real party animal.” She laughed. “So, you’ll eat too much and be in bed by nine?” I acted as if it offended me. “Gran, I am a twenty-five-year-old man, and you shouldn’t call me out like that. Jeez, I know that I’m boring.” She snorted, shaking her head as she rolled her eyes. “You’re giving me too much credit.” “This is why I never worried about you,” she continued to shake her head before she perked up. “Alistair! Darling! I’ve got Anthony on the telephone. Come say hello,” she encouraged. “Oh, good! I thought it was about time to call him,” I heard him mumble as he came over. The mobile switched hands, and I was staring at my Grandpa. “Happy birthday!” “Thanks, old man. How are you doing?” “Good, good. So, what’s this I hear about a new girlfriend? Hm?” I laughed at his interest. “Um, yeah. I met my dream girl.” He rolled his eyes at my dramatics, but he was smiling. “Your dream girl, huh? Is she an American?” I nodded. “She’s a sweet little southern bell, but she might smack me if she heard me say that,” I said in a fake country accent that was terrible. “She’s from Houston, Texas.” “Oh, got yourself a cowgirl?” He joked, trying to do an accent too. His was worse. “Actually, I know her guardian as a teenager owns a ranch. She’s told me how she rode with her best friends sometimes,” I explained in a chuckle. “But she’s not wearing cowboy hats and boots,” I smirked as I wrinkled my nose. Bella came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a robe. I could see only the choker and stockings. Her gorgeous makeup was green and red, her lips calling to me. “So, what does she look like?” He asked, pulling my attention away from her. I couldn’t help but grin. “Well, she’s very petite. A tiny thing and right fit. Very fit,” I explained. That didn’t cover how stunning she was. “She’s got the longest, curliest, black hair that goes all the way to her bum. And her eyes are the most amazing thing. She’s got one blue eye and one brown. It’s bewitching,” I continued as she held my gaze. Bella looked away, blushing as she pulled the robe to her tighter. “She does sound enchanting. I can’t wait to meet her. She getting ready for your hot date?” He asked playfully as he wiggled his eyebrows at me. I laughed and nodded. “She is. She’s just got out the ladies, in fact.” Slowly, my girl walked over to the bed and sat down beside me, so she could talk to my grandfather too. She held the robe so tightly in place her knuckles were white. She smiled widely, nervously. “Hi!” His mouth opened in surprise, looking between us. “Would you look at that! Your eyes really are different colors. Your bird is quite the looker!” He smirked. “How are you doing, dollface?” “Oi, old man. Don’t flirt with my lady.” I tried to copy his accent badly and laughed somewhere in the middle. “When I have your grandmother? Never.” “I love you. I can’t wait to see you again in February,” I told him honestly, having a pang of longing for my family. It had been too long since we had been together. “I love you too, darling boy. Is she coming?” He asked as he nodded his big head towards her. I instantly grimaced. I decided to play it off as a joke. “Shh... I’ve not asked her yet,” I said in a fake whisper. “I was going to ask her at Christmas. I was going to ply her with presents before I asked her to go visit the insane asylum with us.” Actually, I was going to confess my love to her first before I tested that by introducing her to my crone of a mother. Grandpa pursed his lips for a moment, looking around. “Oops, oh, dear. Would you look at the time? I have nothing to do. Your aunts send their love. Have a good birthday!” And then he hung up. That fucking trouble maker. This is where I got my attitude problems. I shook my head, my jaw to my chest for a second. “You bastard,” I laughed in annoyance. That cat was out of the bag, and there was no putting it back. I threw my mobile onto the table beside us. Taking a deep breath, I looked at Bella. “Okay. Well, then. Would you like to go with me to Australia?” She didn’t hesitate at all. “Yes, I would.” I chuckled happily. “Yeah?” Finally loosening her grip on her robe, she nodded her head as she gazed up at me. Her smile was so pretty, curved ever slightly to one side. “I’d love to.” Thank you to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Forty-two: Mum“Christ, no,” I mumbled. Bella glanced back at me with concern in her mismatched eyes. “Sorry, I have to, or she won’t stop,” I explained apologetically. She nodded her head, looking puzzled. “Hello, Mum. You’re up early today.” My girlfriend started to cackle meanly, throwing her head back. “Oh, no...” She whispered to herself. “Hello, Anthony! Happy Birthday!” My mother began loudly in her purposefully over-posh accent. She was putting an effort in to use her nice voice. It felt like a trap. “Thank you,” I replied weakly. This was the last thing I wanted or needed. “Are you at home?” She pondered. “No,” I answered promptly, but she was already talking again by the time it came out of my mouth. “We’re about to leave on our holiday today! I’m delighted.” I rubbed my temple, my head already starting to ache. “Yes, I know. I don’t suppose I can call you back?” I asked as I followed Bella over to the shoes. It was quieter over there and had a lot of empty chairs to sit in. I had spoken to my parents the week before about their travel plans. It was probably the seventh or eighth time. They were good at repeating themselves. Perhaps they just forgot which child they discussed it with. “No, no, no,” she stated hastily. “You know how shotty mobile service is once you get on the road. It’s better if we talk now. I won’t be able to later most likely, and I have to speak to my son on his twenty-fifth birthday!” I flopped into the seat, covering my eyes for a moment. “I see.” That was a shite excuse. I wouldn’t call her out right then. Life was too short to argue over stupid things. She was just my mother and wanted to talk to me, I reminded myself. I couldn’t blame her for it, even if she was being rude and ignoring me. “Are you working? Where are you? At home?” “No. I’m in New York this week,” I answered sharply. We had spoken about my trip at least twice, and I had talked to all of my sisters, grandparents, and father about it. There was no way that she didn’t know about it. I had even brought it up when she discussed her plans. My mother drew in a sharp breath as if I had smacked her. “You didn’t tell me you were traveling for your birthday!” Anger began to build in the back of my skull, but I needed to keep my cool. As if I had to tell her anything in the first place. I was an adult. “Yes. Yes, I did tell you.” “No, you didn’t!” She spat back, her poshness dropping with her rising attitude. I wanted to punch someone in the face. Her, preferably. But she wasn’t there. “No. No, Mum, I did. I swear, I did tell you,” I hissed through my teeth. There was no person on the planet that could push all of my buttons faster. “Are you working?” She asked again, disregarding my tone. My mother had an inability to listen, at least to me. I couldn’t imagine a human wanting to be like that on purpose, but I didn’t think she was that dim, either. Perhaps it was me she had a problem with. “No, I’m not working. No,” I repeated because I was annoyed. I was getting too old to feel this way. She was sucking all the joy out of my body. “I told you I was taking a vacation for my birthday,” I spoke the words slowly as if she was stupid. Maybe it would help. I was already starting to lose my patience. All the while, Bella was busily looking at stripper shoes. “Are you traveling with someone or alone?” She said the word ‘someone’ as if it was venomous. She thought I was wildly partying with my friends. But I wasn’t sure why. I hardly did in school. “Yes. With my girlfriend.” There was a slight pause. “Girlfriend? You didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend,” my mother retorted. “Yes, I’ve told you about her.” Bella glanced over her shoulder at me, smirking. Her attention went back to the boxes. She ran her finger over some as she looked for sizes. “No, you didn’t.” “Yes,” I stated shortly, interrupting her before she could catch her breath. She huffed loudly. “No, you didn’t,” my mum repeated. “Yes.” “I swear, you purposefully keep these things from me-” She began to rant, but I wouldn’t have any of it. She was out of her damn mind. “No. No, Mum-” Of course, she spoke over me. “You didn’t-” “Mum, I did.” She tried to speak again. “Mother!” I growled her, half tempted to just hang up on her. Pinching my nose, I covered my eyes as I struggled to take a deep breath. If I had a brain aneurysm, I wouldn’t have been surprised. Bringing a pair of heels over with her, Bella sat beside me to try them on. She pouted her bottom lip a little, a bit concerned for me. My sanity was slipping, so she had a right to be. I was a weirdo who was arguing with my mother in the middle of the porno shop. “Why? Why must you be so difficult?” Mum demanded. “If we just talked more often-” Hell, no. We spoke too much, in my opinion. I could have done without hearing her shrill voice ever again. “It’s not my fault you don’t listen to me when I speak.” “Anthony!” She hissed my name. “Ugh, this is not the right time to discuss this. We will go over this later.” “Okay,” I mumbled like a fifteen-year-old. That meant nothing. She would bring it up whenever she was looking for another fight. It was just ammo. She tried to ignore me, making her voice more cheerful. “So, are you free to talk right now?” “No,” I snapped loudly. My mum paused. My answer confused her. I could almost see the way she turned her nose up. “Are you busy?” “Yeah, Mum. Obviously, I’m busy if I asked to call you back, but you ignored me. I- I-... ugh, Mum. Please? I really can’t talk,” I sputtered out desperately, tiring of the conversation. My head was pounding, and my buzz was all gone. I could have used three more mimosas and a joint. This was why I had anxiety. “What are you doing?” “I’m shopping. Shoe shopping.” “Oh!” She said excitedly. She loved to shop. It was her favorite hobby. It’s probably where I got it from. “Have you found yourself something nice for your birthday?” “No. Not for me.” Bella finished putting the heels on and examined her feet before standing. Her eyes got big, and she glanced at me. “Oh, I’m almost tall.” I smiled. She was the cutest thing on the planet. Her joy made me forget about my mother for just a minute. “No, darling, you’re not,” I replied with a wink, teasing her. She prettily scrunched up her nose. “What, sweetheart?” Mum asked in confusion. My eyes rolled hard, shaking my head. “I was talking to Bella. My girlfriend.” I would never call her ‘darling’ or any other pet name. “I swear you’ve not told me about this person,” she mumbled in annoyance under her breath. “Where is she? Hm? What is she doing right now?” “Yes, I have,” I pointlessly repeated. I wasn’t certain why I bothered. “She’s trying on shoes.” I wasn’t sure why she asked, either. It wasn’t as if I would allow her to speak to her. Anyone else in my family, I would. My sisters, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, and friends would eat her up like candy, but my mother lacked a sweet tooth. I couldn’t do that to Bella. She huffed. “And are you going to be buying her these shoes?” The questions were only getting worse. I wasn’t liking where this was heading. There was an insult just waiting under the surface. I frowned. “If she wants them,” I explained slowly. Obviously, she didn’t like that. She made several unpleasant, judgmental noises under her breath. “You should be careful with women who-” I wouldn’t let her put Bella down, especially when she didn’t know her. “Actually. No, actually. She-” My mother interrupted before I could get the words out. “Is she at least British? Or Australian?” “Bella is American. She’s from Texas.” “Ah,” she drawled as if something had left a bad taste in her mouth. “Texas. I see. Interesting. And what does she look like?” “I’ll send you a picture later.” Nope, I would not. I had posted photos on my social media. If she wanted to get them, she could work for them. Honestly, the fact that she denied knowing about her was insulting. She knew how to use computers. We were friends on Facebook. There was a second of quiet. “And does anyone else in the family know about this girlfriend you’ve gotten all of a sudden?” Mum asked sarcastically. “Has anyone met her?” “Nana’s spoken to her.” “In person?” She questioned in shock. This woman was a judge. People spent time in prison because of her decisions. I knew she was smart, or at least could be. I blinked slowly. “No. Of course, on the phone, you daft koala.” My girlfriend began to giggle. “You daft koala,” she said to herself under her breath. She was walking around, stretching her arms over her head before looking at me playfully. Her ass looked incredible with the heels, her tight blue jeans giving me pause. Glancing over her shoulder at me, she raised an eyebrow. “Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?” God, I wanted her. “You’re not helping, first off. Second, the only woman I’m kissing with this mouth today is-” “Anthony, did you say something?” She interrupted our flirting. “No, Mum.” “Oh, your father just walked in. Would you like to speak to him?” She offered. The relief was palpable. “Yeah. Why don’t you put Dad on the phone, so I can say hello to him before you have to go?” Which I hoped was soon. I wished he would drop her off on the moon and leave her crazy ass there. Bella sat back down beside me to take off the heels. They were incredibly sexy. I put them into the basket with the rest of the things. They would look amazing with any of the thigh highs that we had already picked out. “Well, well, well!” My father started brightly, his accent thick. It always was when he first woke up. I used to make fun of him and say he sounded like a pirate. “There’s my only son!” “Hi, Pops. How are you?” I smiled to myself. “I’m exceedingly well. Thank you! Happy to go out and about on a lovely little holiday.” “That’s good!” This was a normal conversation with a parent. “So, how are you doing?” “I’m very well. Thank you.” “By the way, happy birthday, my brilliant boy!. Having fun? What are you doing?” He excitedly inquired. We didn’t get to talk that much. Mum usually spoke over us, even on the phone. She must have left the room. “Oh, thank you! I am having a very good day. Me and my girl are out in Manhattan,” I informed him awkwardly. I couldn’t explain any of the ways we were really having fun. ‘Well, Pops, me and the missus went down to the ol’ toy store where I plan on spoiling her with a half a dozen vibrators at least. Mainly because I want to use them on her while we root around for bloody fucking hours. Should be legendary, mate.’ Nope, I couldn’t even say it to Jasper, and he would have found it brilliant. He chuckled. “That sounds delightful. Are you going to party tonight?” “We’re probably going to spend the evening in. I need a break,” I added quickly. My cheeks heated as I lied just a little. “Well, nothing else matters as long as you’re having fun with your girl, right? Is she taking good care of you?” I smiled to myself. “Yeah, she’s the best.” “Good. Well, we need to head out soon. We have a drive ahead of us.” “Alright, Dad.” He lowered his voice some. “Do you want to talk to your Mum more?” She definitely wasn’t in the room, but she was somewhere close. “No, don’t give me back to her. She’s fucking nuts,” I replied with a chuckle, making him laugh, too. Poor bastard. I didn’t envy him. “I’ll talk to you later. I love you both. Bye.” When I hung up the phone, I closed my eyes tightly and put both of my hands over them. My head throbbed so much. “Okay there, cowboy?” Bella asked teasingly as she put her thick black boots on. I looked at her, frustrated. “I swear to Christ, one day she’s going to make me insane. It’s like seven in the morning there, and she’s arguing with me like a bloody lunatic. I am so glad I am on another continent right now.” Her lips pursed with amusement. “She does have great timing.” “Right?!” I whined as I stood up before I offered her my hand. I was determined to forget about the conversation. “Okay. Let’s try this again, shall we?” Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Forty-one: Kinda AwkwardI woke up on the morning of my birthday with my beloved nude by my side. We had made love before dawn, and she had lost her nightgown and panties amongst the covers. Bella looked so beautiful and comfortable. Her arms were underneath her head with her wildly curly hair spilling all over her face and back. Before I got out of bed, I leaned down and kissed several of her tattoos slowly. She hummed softly but didn’t wake up. Going to the bathroom, I brought my phone with me to check my messages. I had sent dozens of pictures to my family and friends the day before to show off my first American Thanksgiving experience. I even shot a video with Bella in my lap as we ate our shared plate of desserts. She giggled as she told everyone, ‘Happy Thanksgiving from Brooklyn!’ cheerfully before taking a bite of pumpkin pie. It got a little whipped cream on her lips. It ended with me kissing it off of her sweet mouth. Her head tilted back with a smile as her eyes fluttered shut. We both looked so content. I also put that one up on Twitter. It had gotten thousands of likes and retweets. I titled it, ‘Starting my birthday off early with the prettiest photographer in the world, and she’s feeding me some pie!’ ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY!’ was repeated in all caps several times in my group chat with my sisters. My brothers-in-law, aunts and uncles, and a few cousins had also sent me texts or messages online. I had spoken to my Nana a little the evening before on the way to the hotel in the car. Jasper sent me a photo of a drawing he made that was elaborate and colorful, done in markers. The picture said ‘happy birthday, darling’ in elegant lettering. It had every cartoon or video character I had done around it. It made my heart flutter with joy. It was so beautiful, and it had to take him days. “That’s stunning. I hope I’m actually getting it. I need it in my office.” “You are. It’s already in the mail,” he answered within a few seconds. “Happy Birthday.” After I washed my hands, I called him since he was awake, and my girl wasn’t. “Thank you.” I smiled when he picked up. “Having a good day so far?” He questioned in a lively tone. “It hasn’t started yet,” I chuckled at his enthusiasm. He had more energy than me. “I just woke up, and Bella’s still out like a light. She worked so hard yesterday and deserves a little extra rest.” “What do you have planned?” He eagerly asked next. “In New York City, you could do literally anything. It sounds like so much fun. I can’t wait to visit someday.” I laughed. We could do anything, that was true. But that wasn’t what was going to happen. “And what I’m going to do is Bella, after we go to the sex shop. At her suggestion, mind you.” Jasper chuckled softly before clicking his tongue. “Well, good for you. I mean, that seems like the perfect way to spend any day. I’m even more jealous now.” Sighing, I smiled to myself. “It really is. I miss you, though. I wish I could spend some time with you, too.” “Oh, kinky,” he said dryly. “A birthday threesome? It might be awkward, but I’m down.” I barked out a loud laugh, shaking my head as I flushed. I was grateful that I was alone. It turned me on a little, but I wouldn’t tell him that. If they were half as fun as some of my dreams, I would have been all for it. “Oh, well, you know… I think that’s something Bella might be down for, too. Apparently, she was wild in uni,” I said to deflect. “Oh!” I remembered something I hadn’t told him yet, getting distracted. “She’s pansexual, by the way. She confirmed it yesterday.” There was a long moment of silence. Jasper swallowed before clearing his throat roughly. “Really?” “I’m just going to assume you know what that is because I googled it to be sure when she wasn’t looking.” “I do,” he blurted out. “She doesn’t care about gender, basically. I wonder if she’s ever dated anyone trans,” he mumbled to himself. Shrugging, I shook my head. There were so many things I didn’t know about my sweet little girlfriend yet. It delighted me to learn them all. “Mm, I don’t know. Maybe one day we’ll discuss it. Not today, though. I also discovered that Bella used to fuck her best friend. A lot apparently. And she is a knockout, too.” I blew out a breath. Jasper snickered again, then hummed. “Got a picture?” “I’ll send you some later. I’ve told you about her. To be honest, I feel a little guilty,” I confessed, turning away from my reflection in the mirror. “Man, they’re the ones who had sex, don’t feel guilty about thinking-” “No,” I chuckled, interrupting him. “I feel bad because Alice… She’s still in love with Bella and has been for fucking years. Years. Since they were teenagers. And she’s honestly a great person, and I know that Bella cares about her, too. Loves her. She told me they dated when they were kids, but she was miserable because Alice isn’t affectionate enough.” “That’s not a problem you have,” he replied in an almost monotone voice. “No,” I agreed quickly. “And Alice broke up with her. Now, I wonder if Bella would have dated her if she asked again after Aiden died.” He grunted. “Does it matter?” The question lingered for a moment. He had a point. “I guess not, no. If Bella wanted her, she could have gone after her. She’s aggressive when she wants to be. Honestly, the only thing missing from their relationship is sex.” “I understand how she feels,” he grumbled as if it annoyed him. It confused me. “What?” “Our relationship when we were living together. It was everything but fucking.” Snorting quietly, I shook my head again. “You never cuddled with me. Apparently, they snuggle. They hug and kiss a lot, too. It’s adorable.” “Well, big boy, I didn’t know you wanted them,” he barked back sarcastically, making me laugh in shock at his tone and pitch. “Come here, darling.” He made several smooching noises. “You’re a dumbass.” I grinned a little. My cheeks were on fire, thinking about holding him. We enjoyed wrestling around, but that’s not something we had ever done. I wouldn’t have hated it. “I miss you loads.” He sighed heavily. “I do, too. This is the first birthday of yours that we haven’t spent together in over a decade.” “I know. It’s weird.” “It’s okay, though! You’re about to have a fabulous day with your future bride,” Jasper joked more vigorously, his voice bright. “Your first birthday with her.” “Yes. You’re right. One of many. But the next one, you will be with us, too. I promise. Even if we have to go to you.” I would figure out a way to make it happen. The idea of Bella coming to Australia with me to meet not only him but my family popped into my head. I wanted it so badly, but it scared me because it was too soon to even propose it. She had just agreed to travel with me for several occasions, and I didn’t know how much I could push it. “Well, I’ll go ahead and take the day off then,” he quipped. “Yeah, you do that.” I glanced at the clock. My stomach was talking to me, and it was getting later in the morning. “Hm… I think it’s about time to wake Isabella up. I’m starving. Have a good day, lovey.” I sarcastically blew him a kiss. “Alright, darling. Have fun and misbehave for me.” He didn’t have to tell me twice. Crawling into bed, I kissed up the back of Bella’s bare thighs and over her ass. She giggled quietly, reaching behind her to scratch her nails through my hair. Moving up her spine, she squeaked softly when my half erection poked her in between the cheeks. “Good morning, birthday boy,” she murmured sleepily. “How are you?” “Hungry,” I growled in her ear. She arched her back some, rubbing against me purposefully. Bella wiggled her ass before glancing over her shoulder for a moment. “What would you like to eat?” “Room service?” I began to suck on the nape of her neck. Nodding her head, she sighed at my touch. Bella turned her face to the side and kissed my jaw. I adjusted a little so that she could roll over underneath me. “Champagne and weed while we wait?” She asked with an impish smile, running her fingers over my lips. I nodded too. “I think there was orange juice in the minibar.” I pecked at her fingertips. “Perfect.” I got the menu as she put on a silk robe. Bella made us each a flute, bringing mine before crawling back into bed with her own. Curling at my side, she was obviously very relaxed and happy. It seemed to rub off on me, making me feel cozy, too. “Everything sounds good,” she murmured, caressing her nails over my stomach lightly. “I don’t know what I want.” There was an easy way to inspire her. I reached over and grabbed the bag of vape pens to let her pick. She giggled, taking one. I had only taken that one hit and hadn’t needed them. It surprised me. I usually slept for shite when I traveled. I took smaller drags, but it still made me cough. By the time we were walking to the adult toy store, my brain was buzzing loudly, but I couldn’t focus on that. It was cold as fuck, and it felt as if I was being stabbed through my clothes. Bella tried to reassure me I only needed better attire, but I wasn’t sure that I believed her. I would go the following day while she was preparing for the show to get said warmer clothing. It was worth a shot. Once we were in the shop, I was happy just not to be in the cold anymore. I took one of the little baskets with a big grin, swinging it around playfully to make her giggle. She took my hand, leaning against me as we walked to the racks. “I’ve never known what to get. Vibrator wise.” She began to look through the corsets before glancing up at me. “What’s your favorite color?” I shrugged. It depended on the day of the week. “Blue. Or red. Purple.” I started to scan through the underwear selection, too. I brought something up that looked like a torture device. “Wow. That looks painful.” She sexily smirked. “It’s not supposed to be on long.” “Yes, true.” “Do you see something you like?” She asked from underneath her eyelashes, her lips ever so slightly parted. She was the most sensual woman that I had ever seen. I swallowed heavily as heat crawled up my neck to my ears. “I’m feeling very shy suddenly.” Biting her lip for a moment, she lowered her voice. “I want you to pick something for me. Anything. Really. I just want to see. Costumes, kinky, weird. Basic as fuck. I don’t care.” “I don’t know where to start.” Bella grinned. “Look around. We have all day. It doesn’t have to be any of this. It can be stockings or shoes. A collar. A funny hat, perhaps?” I laughed a bit at her attempt to make me more comfortable. “No. No hats, I think.” Holding my hand, she led me over to a different part of the store with all the hosiery. She tapped her lip for a moment before taking a pair of thigh highs with a tiny bow on the back and put it into the basket. Then she glanced at me expectantly. My girlfriend wanted me to pick something sexy out for her and didn’t care what. I had the money to buy whatever she or I desired. Frankly, I was acting like an idiot. I got some simple white ones with thick lace at the top. She giggled quietly, smiling at my choice. “I like the red and white striped for Christmas,” she said with a bit of a chuckle in her voice. Without a thought, I seized it. Laughing louder, she put her hand up. “Wait! You don’t have to grab everything I point out.” “No, I like them, too,” I assured her. She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Then, at least get the right size!” I hadn’t even looked at that. I was a bigger moron than I realized. “Oh, right. Sorry.” I laughed nervously and got the correct size. I leaned in so that I could whisper in her ear. “I might like taking pictures of you in these.” I enjoyed snapping photos of her in anything, but nothing but a pair of those would be the best. Her skin got pinker as she peeked up at me. “We should look for stuff to match. Maybe silky green, like the bow. It’s very Christmassy.” “Yes, I like that idea.” She pointed to the circular racks again. I put my hand on the small of her back as she moved in that direction. My confidence was building, or maybe my horniness, and I was ready to search more seriously. Annoyingly, my phone began to ring, and I knew right away who it was without having to look. Dread immediately filled my body.  Episode Forty: BoobIt was late by the time the party wound down. People started saying goodbye, hugging, and whispering things in ears about how much they loved and missed each other. Rosalie, Alice’s sister, began to sniffle as she embraced Bella. Her eyes turned a little red, but she held it in. “I hate that you won’t be at Christmas,” she complained when she pulled away. “I just can’t spend that much time in Texas. It feels…” She shook her head, then frowned. “I don’t want to put myself through that right now.” “I understand,” Emmett said, making his eyes wider behind his wife. I stood behind Bella, rubbing her shoulders as they spoke. Rose glanced back, and he shrugged at her. “It’s hard for me to go home, too.” Bella smiled at them, leaning back into me. “I have better plans now, anyway.” “Jealous,” he mumbled under his breath before moving down to kiss her cheek. “Have fun in LA. Hey, maybe you can go to the Rose parade?” I had no idea what that was, but I would look it up to see if it was something that would interest Bella. I knew she loved flowers. She giggled and shrugged. “I don’t know what we’ve got planned, but I’m not getting up at the crack of dawn on New Year’s. If I’m awake, it better be because we didn’t go to sleep,” she purred as she looked at me, running her fingers under my jaw for just a second. Oh, that sounded like more fun than flowers any day of the week. Alice took the laundry basket they brought with them and stuffed it with leftovers. She would eat well for a while. Or at least through the weekend. She stood beside her sister. “I’ll walk out with you. Bella, are you going to stay at the apartment or the hotel?” “Mm, hotel,” she replied as she took my hand. “Do you want to go see the Brooklyn Bridge first? I’m a little wound up, and I think I need to walk off some of this food.” “I’d love to,” I smiled eagerly. Demetri gave her a big hug. He was drunk on eggnog, as was his husband. They were lying sleepily on the couch, laughing at old cartoons from the nineties. “Wait! Let me redo your lips first!” He mumbled, rushing over to his kit that was still set up because he spent some time doing other girl’s hair and makeup. Bella just rolled her eyes and followed him with a smile. It only took a minute. “Pretty, pretty, pretty,” he said when he was done, booping her on the nose with the tube. “Go to bed before you pass out on the sofa,” she teased them as we left, her arm wrapped around mine. It was stupidly cold, and I hated it, but I wouldn’t let her see it if I could help it. I focused my mind on other things as we made our way to the park by the bridge. My thoughts went to her spending time in Los Angeles. She stated that she had better plans, but I wanted it to be more than ‘better.’ I wished for it to be a trip that she would never forget. It would be a memory to share with our grandchildren and, hopefully, our great-grandchildren. “Where shall we go on our snow trip?” I began lightly, gazing at her with a smile. Bella bit her lip before shrugging, looking back after a moment. She scrunched up her nose in worry. “I don’t know. I don’t really want to ski. It scares me, to be honest. You can if you want to. I’d love to take pictures of the mountains, though. Maybe we could go hike.” Bella swiftly shook her head. “I don’t know. I mainly want to be with you. Why don’t you just surprise me?” She jested with a giggle. She wasn’t serious, but I could accomplish that. “I could do that. That could be fun. Yeah. Okay. I can plan the perfect romantic weekend away for us.” Gasping in a soft breath, she looked at me in shock. “I don’t mean for you to do all the work. I was joking.” I shook my head in return. It was perfect. I could go all out. “No, it’s not working. It gives me something nice to plan out. It’ll give me something to look forward to when I have to be away from you again.” I dragged my fingers across her cheek, and she leaned into them with a smile as her eyes sank closed for a moment. When she opened them again, she said, “I’d want to put money towards that.” Nope, not going to happen. I was going overboard in the biggest way ever, and I wouldn’t look at the cost for even a second. I had all the money that I could ever want, and I would spend it on spoiling her as she deserved. “No. I got it.” She instantly began to pout. “That’s not fair.” Who fucking cared about that? Life was unfair. I was okay with that. I wanted to treat her so that I could make the time as special as possible. For a moment, I searched my brain for a solution that would make us both happy. “Alright. Then you can pay for the next weekend trip. You plan it out and make it a surprise. Then it’ll be fair.” “I’m going to hold you to that,” she declared seriously. It made me so excited for our future together. “Good. I hope you do. What do you think? Again in January or shall we have a quick trip before I go to Sydney in mid-February? Spring seems like such a long time to wait for another little trip.” I wanted her to just stay with me forever, but I knew that wouldn’t happen. Not yet, anyway. She sighed softly, her head leaning against my shoulder as we continued to walk on the concrete path. “We’ll have to look at your schedule.” “How about you figure out a date, and I’ll make the time.” Bella was more important, and it was far enough away to rearrange anything with no consequences. Finally, she pulled back with a grin. “Alright. Let me do some research then, on what I want to do exactly. I want to make it a good trip.” My girl was a cute little nerd. I loved how excited she got about it. It was another weird thing we had in common. “Research? Sounds exciting,” I teased lightly. “I want you to know I’m going to take out all the stops. And bring your passport, just in case.” Her eyes lit up. “Oh, Canada could be fun. You know if you bought yours, we could go to the Falls. You could probably make a video about it.” I didn’t want to think about work, but I loved that she thought about those sorts of things. “That is something to consider.” We went around a curve, and the Brooklyn Bridge came into sight. A carousel in a building made of glass was lit up in the darkness in front of it. Manhattan glowed just beyond the shimmering black water that was choppy with the wind. It took my breath away. “This view is stunning.” “I like taking pictures here.” “I’ve never gotten to do much in New York besides work,” I admitted. “I’m glad I can explore with you. I feel I might have the best guide. I want you to show me all your favorite spots.” Bella made a face. “I’m not sure how much you’d enjoy that. Some are kind of out there. And so weird. It’s not the normal tourist stuff.” As if I expected anything less. I embraced her tightly, my arms around her waist as I pulled her towards me. “Good.” “Sunday then. Why don’t I take you to a couple of places that I really like? We’ll have to rent a car. It’s just easier that way.” “Sounds great.” She bit her plush bottom lip for a moment, tilting her head to the side as she peered up at me almost innocently. “What do you want to do tomorrow? You really haven’t said anything. I want your birthday to be perfect.” “I really, really, really just want to stay in bed with you. Like, for reals, though. All-day,” I said in a tiny voice before lightly pecking the tip of her nose twice. “And be naughty.” “There is one place we could go then,” she giggled. “Where?” She smirked a little. “A toy store.” “A toy store on Black Friday? Why? Wouldn’t it be very busy?” I blurted out before I had any time to consider it. I had heard horror stories about the day in America and wasn’t interested in getting crushed by a crowd for a cheap toy. My girlfriend looked at me like I was just… dumb. “Stop and think for a moment,” she spoke slowly. The only toys that would be helpful in my plans would be the kind used to get her off more. I really hated myself sometimes. “Oh. Right. Adult. An adult toy store. I am a naïve boob. Wait, do you mean it?” I asked, gaping at her in surprise. Her ‘wow, you’re stupid,’ look remained. “Why wouldn’t I?” She had a point. She just caught me off guard, and my inexperience was shining through. Vicky would have never stepped foot in a sex shop. Either I went by myself, or I ordered it. “I don’t know. I just said I was a naïve boob, Bella.” Her grin grew mischievous. “I guess if you don’t want to, we could always order stuff online and have it shipped, but we wouldn’t get to play with it tomorrow.” She shrugged and pouted a bit. A little shiver ran down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold. “What would you like to get?” “Anything you’d like. I don’t have anything right now. And tomorrow we can do whatever you want with it,” Bella promised seductively as she ran her hands up my chest, her large eyes batting at me. “Whatever, eh?” “Whatever you want,” she repeated. A million happy and dirty thoughts came to mind at once. “Ooo… That feels dangerous. I don’t even know where to begin.” She pressed herself closer to me. “Do you need some ideas?” Oh, I had plenty of those. I brought my hand up to her cheek so that I could rub my thumb over her temple. “I just don’t want to do something you don’t like.” Smirking, she turned her eyes towards me. I knew that she was about to tease me. “Alice once printed out this fun, crazy long BDSM list of things that you could put if you were into it or not. Yes, no. Maybe. Done it, hadn’t done it. Everything from kissing to extreme fetishes. I feel like I need to just fill that out and give it to you for some light reading.” Frankly, I didn’t give a flying fuck if she was joking. I needed it. “Yes, please. That would be very handy. I’ll take any printed manuals I can get.” She instantly giggled. “Why don’t we do something you’ve never done before? Is there anything you’ve wanted to do? Any position? Any toys? Anything you want me to wear? We can do those pictures we were talking about.” She was so indulgent, but I wasn’t sure how far she would let me go. “I think I’d like to think about that for a little while before I answer. But I would like to go to the store with you. We should, at the very least, find something to keep you company while we’re not together,” I responded before giving her a kiss. “I haven’t had anything like that in a while. I don’t even know what I’d want.” “We could get a few different options and test which one is the best.” Nothing was that expensive. I was sure we could find something that she would enjoy if we got a bunch of different things. Her cheeks began to glow as her smile grew again. “These rating videos are getting out of control.” I wanted to giggle, but I stopped myself. “We’ve done the lube. Now the vibrators. Whatever will we do next?” I played along with her a bit too loudly. She enjoyed it, laughing as my arm went over her shoulder. “Ready to get out of the cold?” She asked, bumping her hip into mine. “Yes, please.” When we got to her place, Alice was asleep on her stomach in a pair of Llama pajamas. Bella went to check on her, biting her lip as she smiled to herself. She kept the door open a crack for Patty cat so that she could come and go as she pleased. The kitty followed us back to her room. Swishing around my legs, she was hoping to get attention. My girl shooed her away before shutting the door. The things that I had brought with me were already organized in my backpack. It only took her a minute to shove stuff into her bag. I noticed that she put my gifts at the very bottom. It made me smile. “Oh, wait,” she said right before we were about to leave. “I forgot something.” Bella turned and hurried towards the kitchen. Quickly, she packed a bag of her chocolate chip cookies and passed them to me. “For when you can eat again.” I took one out and put the rest in my pocket. She giggled, taking my offered hand as we went to wait for the car. As I ate the lovely dessert in the lobby, she smirked at me a little. She leaned up on her toes and kissed my mouth lightly. “Mm, I like it when you taste like chocolate.” My other arm went around her waist, pulling her to my side. I realized then that this was how Bella was telling me that she loved me. With food, with her touches, and her gentle smiles. She wasn’t ready to say it out loud yet, and that was okay. I would give her time. I would make every moment of ours together as special as possible for her. If she didn’t have enough to rebuild, I could give her everything she needed. I knew that Rome was not built in a day. I decided that I would tell her at Christmas that I was in love with her, before whatever insane trip that I was planning. And hopefully, she would give me the gift of her words in return, while awake, anyway. Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Thirty-nine: WarningA chubby middle-aged man opened the red door for us while still wearing sleep pants. He waved us in, taking things from Bella’s hands. “Hi, sugar. Demetri is still asleep,” he drawled in a thick southern accent. My girlfriend stopped in the foyer, rubbing her fingers through his beard. It was bushy and black. “I love it so much.” It made him smile, his eyes disappearing behind his thick glasses. “After November, it’s getting trimmed. Demetri hates it. It’s for No-Shave November,” he explained. I had no idea what that was. “Cancer research,” he added quickly. “Oh, it will look good when it’s all trimmed up. You should keep it thicker.” “Maybe.” He shrugged before looking over at her best friend. She had not woken up gracefully. Or at all. “Al, how are you?” She simply put her milk crate of stuff onto the countertops before turning and leaving the room. She stomped towards a set of stairs, slamming the door behind her. Bella snorted, shaking her head as she walked over to the stove. Once again, she owned the kitchen. This was a much bigger and nicer space to work in. Riley and I helped in any way we could, but she mostly ordered us to wash things. It took her hours until she got to a point where she didn’t have to babysit the food. It was still stupidly early in the morning, and I had already eaten four doughnuts and drank three mugs of coffee. “So, do you like video games?” Riley asked conversationally as we watched her beginning to decorate. “She has a vision, it’s best just to let her go,” he whispered. I chuckled to myself. “Yeah, love them. What are you thinking?” “I got a bit of everything. Want to do a fighter, racer, or something like that?” “I always love a good fighter.” We were deep into our match on the couch, both of us wearing headphones so it wouldn’t get too loud and bother all the sleeping people in the house. I kept stealing glances at my girl as she danced around the room, making everything perfect for the day. Suddenly, someone was touching the top of my head. My hands stopped moving as my body got stiff in surprise. Bella started to giggle. “Why are you petting my boyfriend?” “What?” The tall skinny man said as he squinted his eyes at me. It was evident that he was blind as a bat. “Fuck. Sorry. Wrong head. Hello.” “Uh, hi,” I began to chuckle nervously, looking over at his husband, who was rolling his eyes and shaking his head. He started to pat him instead. “Good morning, baby.” “Go put your glasses on,” Bella shouted at him. He just pouted. “Go get laser surgery then. This is embarrassing.” Amused, she shook her head and rolled her eyes at her friend, too. “I don’t have the time to be blind,” he snapped. “That’s not how that works. The laser fixes your blindness.” Riley cleared his throat, looking up at him as he continued to get petted. “He’s scared of it.” My girlfriend looked confused. “But, you get work done all the time.” “But it’s my eyes!” Demetri whined loudly, huffing a little. “Fine. I’ll go get ready and put my contacts in. Bells, then I’ll do you.” “Got it.” She smirked before saluting him dramatically to be a ham. “Also, that’s what she said.” He snorted as he disappeared back into his bedroom to get ready. He emerged, looking like Jeffery Star’s twin brother. It wasn’t a bad outfit, just shockingly pink. Bella never sat down in the hour that it took him to get dressed. He looked around when he came out again, putting his hands on his slender hips. “It looks great!” “I don’t know. How can you tell?” She quipped meanly. He made a face before ignoring her. “I left some shampoo and conditioner out I want you to try. I got some free samples. I think I want to do it curly today.” “Whatever you want to do.” She shrugged, dusting her hands off before heading into the kitchen. When she did, Alice finally came out and stomped to the couch. She plopped down beside me. I offered her the bag of doughnuts from the table. She gave me a weak smile, settling in to watch television with me. Riley had to work on something in the kitchen, so we had paused our fighting match. Bella kissed the top of my head before she went to get ready in the same bedroom that Demetri had disappeared into earlier. About five minutes later, she popped out. “Eddie, can you bring me my bag? It’s by the front door.” “Yeah, sure,” I instantly agreed, darting off the sofa. I brought it to her, slipping inside to have a private moment with her. Then I realized that she was only in a towel. With no thought, I shut the door and tugged her to me. I kissed her lips, my hands sliding down her body. I pulled on the thin fabric that was keeping me from seeing her perfect breasts. “I wasn’t expecting to see your tits in the middle of the day, but I’m not mad about it at all.” “If there weren’t so many people in there, I would be tempted to have a quickie.” I would have taken it out and bent her over something in a second, regardless of the people outside, but I knew for sure she wouldn’t let me do that. So, I felt her up as much as possible before I was told to behave. I massaged one of her breasts, making her nipple get hard against my palm. “That would be terrible of us. We can’t, but let me kiss them goodbye before they go away.” Then I wrapped my arms around her thin waist, bringing her up towards my mouth to cover them with kisses generously. She moaned softly, her head falling back as my fingers gripped her ass cheek. Sadly, she started to pull away. I plucked each of her nipples before she left my grip. Aroused, Bella blushed. She bit her lip, looking me over. “Don’t worry. You can play with them all day tomorrow if you want to.” I smiled at her words. “I was planning on it…” She began to pout a bit. “I wish you could join me so you could come play with me. But I guess I will just have to masturbate in the shower all alone.” She was so evil. Fuck. My cock begged for attention as she grinned wickedly. I whined a little, smacking her ass as she pranced away. It took a few minutes to get myself to calm down enough to go back into the living room. When I did, it was my turn to plop down beside Alice. I glanced at her with a smirk. “I don’t suppose you’ll tell me what you two did in college,” I said sarcastically. I wiggled my eyebrows at her playfully. “Was it dirty?” Alice raised a brow in my direction. There was a little powdered sugar on her cheeks, and her spiky black hair was everywhere. It was cute. She looked like a teenager on Christmas morning. “Oh, we fucked. We fucked a lot.” And then that came out of her mouth. “Mary Alice!” Demetri snapped at her in surprise. My jaw hit my chest, and I couldn’t say anything. “What?! It’s true.” He sighed. “What if she didn’t want him to know that?” She shook her head, rubbing her hand over her cheek as she did. “It’s not like she’ll keep it from him. Bella won’t lie to him, and she wouldn’t want me to either.” “You still shouldn’t say it like that,” he mumbled as he went into the kitchen to help his husband with something. Once again, she looked over at me. “Sorry, I’m kind of blunt. But, yeah, we fucked a lot in college. And high school,” she stated more quietly. “I hope that doesn’t make you uncomfortable. It’s been years.” “Um, no.” I shook my head quickly. “I’m just surprised.” “I seriously didn’t mean to out her earlier.” She frowned, picking at her pajamas. “She used to flirt with Aiden like that all the time. I just thought you two were doing a thing, and I was… cranky. And jealous.” I shook my head again. “As I said, I kind of figured. I didn’t know about the pansexual part, but I didn’t even think of it as an option. I thought bi. She’s made jokes about women’s butts…” I trailed off. She laughed a little. “I decided to let her come out to me. I just figured it was best to let her do it when she was comfortable.” “That’s good. Yeah, I think that was the right thing to do with her. Bella really isn’t an open book, even if she acts like she is. She is honest to a fault and will always tell you the truth, as gently as possible. She’s just not one to talk.” “She sometimes does,” I commented. Alice stared at me hard, considering what she wanted to say to me. She glanced back towards the kitchen for a minute before looking at me again. “So, Eddie, I like you, so I will be honest with you. You seem like a great guy, and I want you to know that I am on your team, as long as you’re on hers. Her happiness is all that is important to me, so I will do whatever I can to ensure that. And if that means helping you, that’s what I’ll do.” “That’s awesome… Thank you,” I mumbled awkwardly, blushing a little. “I appreciate that.” She lifted her finger. “I’m not done.” “Oh. I’m about to be threatened, aren’t I?” I joked. She snorted and nodded. She lowered her voice even more. “If you hurt her, there is a line of people that will happily cut you and put you into the ground. But they won’t get to you before I do. Bella is my best friend and the love of my life, and even though I’m not hers, I will protect her as much as I can because she’s been abused too much.” She was serious. “You’re in love with her?” I whispered. Alice sighed. “Does she know?” She nodded once more, frowning. “She cares for you, too. I-” “We dated for a while when we were kids, but we don’t work like that. I can’t give her what she needs, and she was miserable with me. So, I broke up with her,” she explained even though I didn’t ask her to. “What couldn’t you give her?” I blurted out in surprise. “I mean, you’re lovely and smart. Generous. She loves you, too. She called you the love of her life earlier.” Rubbing the back of her neck, she shook her head. “She was joking, though.” She considered my question for a minute. “Bella needs a lot of affection. I don’t know if you’ve noticed. She needs to be touching, hugging, kissing, all the time. And I hate it. I loathe being touched when I don’t want to be. Which is most of the time. And the girl loves to fuck,” she said bluntly. I laughed. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” she repeated more sarcastically with her eyes wide as she looked at her lap. “Yeah,” I chuckled, clearing my throat. “She is… affectionate. I wouldn’t say it was overly so.” “Oh! No! Not at all,” she hurriedly agreed. “And you seem like a loving guy which is what she needs. I’m… not. And I couldn’t force myself to be when we were together. I mean, if I were in the mood to fuck, it would be her that I’d want to do it with.” I sighed. “Have you ever considered trying again now that you’re older?” She shook her head. “Honestly, the last three years that we’ve lived together has probably been my ideal relationship. Separate beds with cuddles only when I want them. Zero expectations of sex while coming home to homecooked food and a clean apartment. And I love it, and she’s… It’s killing her spirit. I didn’t realize how much so until you came into the picture.” I didn’t know what to say. Looking down at my hands, I ran my thumb over my knuckles. “I don’t know what has been said, or if I’m telling you information that you don’t already know, but Bella is in love with you. She hasn’t admitted it to me. But it scares me because I don’t know if she has enough in her to rebuild again. She’s been broken down so many times.” “I love her,” I whispered. “She’s not told me, and I haven’t told her. She’s said it in her sleep, though.” Alice laughed. “She talks so much, doesn’t she? If you ever want to know what’s on her mind…” she trailed off. Once again, she glanced at me. “But like I said, I’m on your side. Make her happy, and we’ll be fine.” “Thank you,” I repeated. “I’m sorry.” She shrugged, shaking her head. “Don’t be. I’m relieved that my friend is smiling again.” A moment later, Bella came out of the bedroom. She had changed into a sweater and blue jeans, her curls damp. She smiled at both of us, walking to the couch so that she could lean over it and kiss the top of my head again. “Demetri,” she sang. “I’m ready for you…” They set up, and he began to do her hair and makeup while bossing people around for her since she was too quiet to do it properly over the noise. I sat with them, watching with fascination as he started to paint her eyes as an artist would a canvas. He covered her in gold. “I bought her some pretty gold lipstick, and it looks very nice on her,” I mentioned when he complimented the shade on her. “I’ve seen! I like your style of gift-giving,” he replied with a sassy little wink. I smirked. “Carpet bombing style? One of them is hopefully going to be a hit?” “No, outrageous. Exactly how it should be.” Demetri waved around the lipstick that he was holding practically in my face. “I’m going to do a plum lip. It says more fall.” He turned his attention back to Bella as he took her jaw. He lifted it some, leaning in. “Something matte.” “That’s what I was thinking,” he concurred with a nod before looking at me. “You should spoil this fine lady. She’s my best girl, and she deserves top-quality everything.” “I couldn’t agree with you more.” His face became serious, and he squared his shoulders. “Good. Because I will fuck you up if you make her cry. I’m her big brother. Got it?” I kind of laughed, unsurprised at this point by the threats. I put my hands up in acceptance. “Got it. Dr. Zucker gave me the same warning already, pretty much. He may have been a bit more graphic on how, as a doctor, he could get rid of my body if I do anything untoward to his daughter.” I wouldn’t tell her about Alice’s. I felt maybe that one should be between the two of us. Bella flushed red and began to laugh. “Oh, no. Sorry.” Her friend quickly turned to look at her. “He met Aiden’s parents? How did that go?” My girl beamed like she was proud of me, looking down at her lap as she did. “Oh, god. They all loved him. Claire fucking flipped. We went to the cemetery, and Esther was there. I couldn’t tell her no, so we went back to the house and spent the day there. I don’t think it was too bad,” she finished, peeking up at me worriedly. Smiling, I nodded. “It was great. I am still full.” Demetri shook his head. “I love that woman’s cooking. She’ll feed you until you pop. She reminds me of a less racist version of Riley’s Grandma.” Snorting, she closed her eyes. “Yeah, she’s definitely not a racist. She’ll feed anyone no matter their color, gender, or sexuality. And keep feeding you, and feeding you, and…” she giggled. I chuckled with her. When he began to paint her lips, she reached over and squeezed my hand for just a minute. Her eyes were still closed. People started filing in not long after, all of them coming to greet her warmly. They lit up when they saw her, genuinely excited to be with their friend again. Everyone was telling me how wonderful and kind she was as if I didn’t know. She was having a great time, constantly laughing as she leaned into my side. Bella got so many hugs. “This is my boyfriend, Edward,” she would introduce me, smiling up at me happily. Her gorgeous mismatched eyes peered into mine adoringly. I thought about Alice’s words constantly. After a while, a stunning couple came in, and everyone got excited. They called their names and embraced them. Alice and Bella popped off the couches to go greet them. I realized as the new woman and her best friend hugged that she had the same face. She was taller, though,because of heels, and blond with a much larger chest. She also wore a faceful of makeup while the other had none. They were both beautiful, but I might have preferred the latter’s look. I thought her roommate’s freckles were cute. The man that was standing beside her was bigger than I was. He was probably close to seven feet tall and three-foot across. His arms were thicker than my thighs, and he looked like he could have hefted me around. His smile when he saw my girl was jovial, his face glowing as he picked her up and kissed her many times all over her cheeks. “Put my sister down.” The blond snapped at him. She made a face, and he quickly put Bella back on her feet so that she could give her a hug herself. “I’ve missed you so much.” She leaned her forehead against hers, taking a deep breath. “Oh, Roe… I’ve missed you, too.” Pulling away, she looked between my girlfriend and me several times before she high-fived her. I could have died right there of embarrassment. Bella cackled, throwing her head back. Rolling his eyes, her husband smirked as he shook his head. He glanced over before offering me his hand to shake. “Hey, man. Emmett.” I returned it. “Eddie. Nice to meet you. Bella speaks so warmly of you both.” He gazed at her, pretending to be confused. “Girl.” Emmett smacked Bella’s shoulder lightly. “Why are you lying to this man?” Cocking her head to the side, she peered at him as if he was stupid. “Sweetheart, I can’t go around telling people you’re a dumbass. It would embarrass Roe.” My girl was mean, and I hated myself for loving it and finding it funny. I pinched my lips together hard so as not to laugh loudly. Alice’s sister brought her finger under his chin, holding his gaze. “Everyone already knows he’s a dumbass,” she purred. It was clear by his expression that she just turned him on. My girlfriend had joked about Alice being kinky, but I don’t think she was the only one. She flicked her eyes to Bella. “Now, tell me what to do, so I can help.” Sighing, he looked at me again. Emmett appeared rather lovestruck. His expression was dreamy. “We’re being dismissed.” I figured he knew better than I did. I peeked back at the television, where the game was still going on. “We’re playing Smash Brothers if you’d like to join us.” Instantly, he got excited. “Hell yeah. Let me get a beer first.” “Could you grab me one, please?” I asked as I sat back down on the couch. Alice was playing against Demetri and kicking his ass. “Sure!” A moment later, he returned and sat beside me. He passed me the bottle. “Thanks, mate. Cheers.” “Yeah, no problem.” He grinned. We watched them play for a couple of minutes. “So, you’re the new guy?” I nodded my head. “I believe so. I think she prefers the term gentleman over ‘boyfriend,’ though,” I chuckled. “Classy,” he chuckled, too. He looked at me over his drink, taking a long drag. “Well, you seem like a nice enough dude, so I’ll cut right to the chase. Bella has been one of my friends for a decade, and my wife considers her a literal sister. So that makes her my sister. You hurt her, and I will make your death look like a mob hit.” I began to laugh. I couldn’t help it. He seemed confused. I shook my head, smiling to myself. “Man, you know a girl is worth it when your life gets threatened four times in twenty-four hours. Wow.” “Four?” Emmett asked in shock. He glanced over at Alice and Demetri. “That’s it?” Thanks to Gina for proofreading this episode! Episode Thirty-Eight: To the MoonI woke up once again with Bella wide awake and leaning over me. She kissed my forehead several times. “Hey there, sweet man. Your alarm went off.” Naked in her tiny bed, the blankets were draped over my hip. She dragged her fingers over my thighs, moving them over my erection. “Mmmm…” I just hummed and reached for her, but she slipped from my grip. “Come back.” “I have to finish getting the stuff ready.” Quickly, I rushed through a shower in her minuscule bathroom. I had to duck to reach the water, and the bathroom was frigid. When it was getting closer to time to leave, Bella went to wake up Alice as well. I peeked in to watch her. Her alarm clock was going off, but she was still snoring loudly. My girlfriend crawled on top of her, straddling her ass. Alice was lying flat on her stomach, her face smashed into the pillow. She leaned down and whispered something in her ear, playing with her hair some as she did. “No,” she moaned. “It's time to go.” Alice waved her hand behind her. “Lay on me.” Adjusting, she did so. I smirked a little to myself. “Yes. Don't move.” Bouncing on her, Bella made her groan. “I need you to carry things.” “It's too early.” My girlfriend wasn’t amused by her bullshit. “You can go back to sleep at Demetri's. Just like every year. You know how this works, Al.” “I'm comfortable now.” She just got rougher, pushing her knee into her. I realized that she wrestled around with her friends, just like I did. Sitting up, she popped her best friend right on the ass cheek with a loud clap. “That's what I'm talking about,” she responded playfully. In answer, Bella began to whack her repeatedly. She just laughed before pushing her over, pinning her down with her cheek on her breast. “There. Stop moving. So fucking bony.” “You know, if I need to give you two a few moments, I can,” I declared with a tiny laugh. Bella turned her head to look at the door. When she did, her roommate roughly grabbed her chest. “Honk, honk.” Her eyes got wide in surprise, and she pinched back, making her friend yelp in shock. Then they started to slap at each other. “Ow! Bitch!” My cock twitched in my pants as I watched. I bit my lip, unable to take my eyes off of them. Pinching her leg, she hurried off the bed. “Then get up!” Alice swiftly reached for her and slapped her butt awkwardly. Bella wiggled her hips as she sauntered away. Annoyed, her friend grabbed the pillow behind her head and threw it at her. She whipped around, and they flipped off at each other off childishly. “You have drool on your face,” she snapped, chunking the cushion back at her head. She came stomping out, half-annoyed and half-amused. I had to bite the inside of my lip to keep the dirty comments in my head. “You two are fun. You have an interesting relationship.” “Good thing you came along. We had a marriage pact at forty-five,” she mused as she went back to her bedroom. I chuckled then hummed. “I'm not sure either of you would be too unhappy about that.” Turning, Bella looked at me with the fullest, most innocent eyes. “Oh, no. Al is the love of my life. We'd have beautiful, weird blond hair tanned babies with one blue eye and one brown. She's a natural blond, you know. Our children would be strange but cute.” “I don't think that's how that works,” I joked, my voice getting higher as I tried not to giggle. I hummed again loudly. “I'm fairly certain someone is missing something essential to the process. Something important.” Her expression unexpectedly turned hot, her eyes flitting over my face as her hand moved across my half-hard erection that was still into the idea of the two girls slapping and rolling around in bed. “Like what?” It went from half to fully erect into about two seconds. “If you would like, I can show you later.” She began to kiss my chin. “Oh, really?” “Mm, yes. I'm even willing to dedicate my entire day tomorrow to showing you if you're interested.” Batting her eyelashes, she made her eyes wider. “Ohhhh… I think I might know what we're doing wrong now.” Bella nodded her head. “See, I told her we needed that strap-on.” Dead. She would kill me. I laughed despite myself, my face flushing. All I wanted to do was make lesbian and threesome jokes. But I was better than that. “I'm not going to be a pervert. I'm not going to be goaded into it. I'm not.” She looked dejected for just a moment, pouting out her bottom lip. “Damn. Why not? I’m trying so hard.” My heart sped up. “You shouldn't encourage these thoughts and behaviors.” “You're already going to spend all day thinking about it now,” Bella purred as she smiled. Her mismatched eyes were mischievous. “Why shouldn't I encourage it?” I was not going to get myself in trouble. “And, what exactly do you think I'm going to be thinking about? Because I have no earthly idea what you're talking about. I am a good boy.” Lies. Lies. So many lies. Slowly, she moved her hands over my chest as she lifted up. “Please,” she breathed. “You're going to be thinking about me, and my cute little bestie all confused in bed with all the fun toys we could possibly play with.” My brain just stopped working. I had to kiss her, grabbing Bella’s cheeks and pulling her towards me. “Wicked, wicked woman. That is... just. I'm- I'm at a loss for words. Why do you do this to me? How?” She looked so sinful, seductively running her hand over my hard-on. “Because it's fun. And it's because all the blood is in your cock instead of your brain.” Bella had opened herself up by making the jokes. The curiosity was eating at me, but I didn’t know how to begin. “Wouldn't it upset you if I thought that?” Giggling, she rolled her eyes a little. “Obviously not.” “Do you... think about her... and you...” I could barely get the words out. She lifted on her toes again to lightly kiss my lips. “Sometimes. Is that okay?” “Oh, oh... Yeah, um... Yes, of course. I'm just surprised. I didn't- I mean, that you think about things like that. I mean, obviously, you do have those kinds of thoughts, but I never... um… Just Alice? Or other ladies as well?” I stuttered out stupidly. For some reason, I just couldn’t spit them out. She thought it was funny and was enjoying screwing with me. “I think about you, too,” she quipped vaguely. “Sometimes, even with her.” Slowly, she ran her tongue over her bottom lip. “So, are you asking me if I like to think about fucking other women?” Even my ears were on fire. “I... I'm not sure how to answer. I want to say yes, but I also don't want to get into trouble.” “You're so sweet and innocent,” she stated with a little laugh, tilting her head to the side. “Why would you get in trouble?” “Dude, she’s so gay,” her best friend yelled from another part of the apartment. Bella closed her eyes, cringing a little. “Thanks, sweetie. That's helpful,” she shouted in return. A sleepy and cranky Alice came shuffling into the doorway. Her cheeks were slightly pink from embarrassment. “Just trying to speed this along. I mean, if he's not cool with that, he's going to have a long few days ahead of him.” “Oh... it's not- No. Um, I actually... kind of- I thought, I've kind of already figured it out? From things that we've talked about. Things she's said before. The tattoos. All the rainbows. And, the charity thing Saturday. It's more than fine. I was going to ask, but I didn't know the right way to do so. I'm sorry, I'm so awkward. I figured you were bi, probably. I shouldn't assume anything, though,” I rambled stupidly. Both women watched me sharply. “Pan, but close enough,” she replied. My girl turned to give her a look. “What? You don't care who knows.” Huffing, she shook her head a little to herself. Bella pushed past her to go to the kitchen. “I'm never having sex with you again,” she mumbled dryly. “Damn, I just outed you on a holiday. There needs to be some family drama. So sensitive,” she teased weakly before giving me a mildly panicked look. She hurried to follow her to the kitchen. “I thought he fucking knew already, and y’all were being flirty. Damn. Not my fault. Talk to your man. It’s too early in the morning for this shit.” “Family drama makes it sound like we're literally incestuous. We’re not even legally sisters.” Her friend turned to look at me. “In college, we used to-” Bella turned and raised her fist in the air as if she was about to give it to her in the face. “Don't even think about it.” “You don't know what story I'm about to tell. It could be a good one.” “It doesn't matter which one.” They stared at each other for a long time before finally, she booped her roommate in the nose. Bella was about to pick up one of the big laundry baskets filled with food. It was huge, though. I quickly took it for her. “Now, I want to know,” I mumbled to myself. Since her friend was obviously not actually mad, she kept joking. “I've got some pictures to show you later.” She laughed wickedly, ignoring the death glare she was receiving. “One of these days, I'm going to knock you to the moon. To the fucking moon, Alice,” she threatened in a thickened New York-style accent that was pretty good. It made me smirk. “I'll tell Mama,” Alice replied in a thick country twang. It was a lot like Bella’s. “She'd understand. I've definitely seen her pop you one, too.” She picked up another box with one hand and pulled out her phone with the other. “I’m ordering the car now.” It took a few minutes, but one arrived. The driver helped us shove things into the trunk and the front seat before we started the long drive over into Brooklyn. Less than five minutes in, her best friend was already out like a light. Alice’s head was lolled against Bella’s arm with her mouth hanging open. My girlfriend was silent as she held my hand, her eyes forward. “Don't be afraid to ask anything you want to know about me. You've been nothing but open with me. I should have really talked about certain things sooner, and I'm sorry I'm so closed off. I just didn't even really think about it, because it's not that big of a deal for me. I was honestly starting to wonder if I was going to be attracted to anyone else at all before I met you,” she blurted out. “I was afraid to upset you or come off as insensitive. I didn't want to push something you weren't ready to talk about. I can understand these things can be hard to express. I would have a hard time telling anyone...” Thinking about my dreams with her and Jasper, I shook my head to get them out. I was embarrassed for just enjoying those. And they were just fantasies. She finally glanced in my direction. “I could never accuse you of being insensitive about anything. I want to be with you, so you have to know all of me. I have to trust you when you say I won't scare you away.” “There is nothing that could,” I promised. I wanted her and everything that came with it. Bella smiled some at my answer, her eyes playful. “You're taking a huge leap of faith that I'm not a former or future serial killer.” I had a good rebuttal for her mocking. “I've been reading that most serial killers are men, so statically, I should be fine.” “Oh, you have been reading, have you? No wonder you haven't been sleeping,” she teased gently as she squeezed my hand. That wasn’t why I couldn’t get any rest, it was just something I did when I couldn’t. “I wanted to see what interested you about it.” She got more comfortable again, putting her head on my shoulder as her friend had done to her. “Did you get anything out of it?” More than I would ever want to know, honestly. “Humans are bloody savages. I'm glad that I didn't live in the sixties or seventies. And why didn't anyone ever lock their damn front door?” I questioned, making her giggle. “It's interesting but scary. I don't think I could read all the books you do. I'm not sure I can have that in my brain.” “It's not for everyone. It's sweet that you did that, though. You didn't have to.” I shrugged my other shoulder. “I was doing it for research as well. Seth wants to do a series on crime. It's kind of the rage right now.” “Oh, he'd enjoy that,” she said with a tiny smile. “I think you would as well. I was going to ask if you'd like to do an episode with him. Just him, actually.” She turned her head to the side to look at me. “Just him?” “That's what we've been talking about. It would be a different kind of video. Mainly you two talking about it, and then we'd add the visuals in post-production. Expand the channel a little bit. Tyler will have his own shit, too.” I couldn’t understand her frown. “That's a lot of work for you. Are you going to have the time for all that?” That was another thought that had been swirling around my head a lot. Zafrina had been bugging me to get help for the channel since I wasn’t interested in a personal assistant. Seth and Tyler were doing more and more of the editing as I became busier. “I'm going to hire some more people next year to start after I visit Sydney in February. A graphics person, a couple more audio-visual people. If it works out, maybe we can really expand the channel. It's what I enjoy doing the most honestly. And I want to keep it going. Especially if you're there to help me.” She seemed surprised. “What about movies and television?” I sighed as I considered it. “I think with the help, I can do both. You were right about needing to hire people. I need to give up some of the reins and delegate. I can be more creative that way and focus on the final product more. I really am thinking about hiring a photographer for the channel, by the way.” Quickly, Bella nodded her head, so her curls bounced a little. “I think that's a good idea.” “Mm, you are my first choice, of course. But I understand if you don't want to. Your position in my growing media empire is there whenever you want it, though,” I flirted gently. I wanted to tread lightly after she got upset the evening before. Bella brought her thumb up to her mouth for a moment to chew on it anxiously. She glanced at me, then straight ahead again. “Esther asked me if I was going to move to LA. I want to help you when I'm there, but I'm not ready for that.” “I could move to New York,” I suggested right away, but she shook her head in answer. “Not right now, you couldn't. Your life works better in LA.” I could not have cared less about how my life worked. I could operate just fine in New York. If she could fly, so could I. “Where does that leave us? Stealing time on the holidays? You're right. Not right now. But maybe next year?” She bit her lip for a moment. “I can't tell you what to do, but I love your house.” I looked away, swallowing. I loved my home, and I was so proud of it. But it was just a house. It wasn’t my future, just a place to lay my head. “I do, too. I don't have to sell it, just get something here. But the LA house… It can be your home, too.” The car stopped in front of a large brick townhouse with a bright red door. Bella squeezed my hand, giving me an awkward smile. “Come on, Mary Alice,” she said sweetly, nudging her friend. “We’re here. It’s time to go inside so you can go to bed.” Hi! I'm taking a couple of weeks off from posting to spend the holidays with my friends and family. Perfect Snapshots will return on Wednesday, January 8th with Episode 39! Have a great new year! 💛⛄❄⭐🎁🎄💛 Episode Thirty-seven: PrepPatty cat screamed at me as soon as I came into the apartment, circling my legs excitedly as I tried to carry the heavy bags inside. “Please don’t trip me. I don’t want to die,” I mumbled, hurrying into Bella’s room. Once I put them down on her bed, I bent down to pick up the creature that followed. She purred loudly. “Look, you’re cute, but you have to leave, my friend.” I put her on the cat tree that was as tall as me. She mewed and flopped down, so I could rub her stomach. “Stay,” I commanded as I pointed at her nose. She looked at me like ‘fuck you, I’m not a dog,’ and hopped down to follow me. I rushed back into the room, and she rattled the door almost menacingly, yowling in compliant. “I’ll be back out in a minute. Crikey,” I laughed, going to set up the heater. The room was a good water leak away from forming icicles. About thirty minutes later, Bella came prancing in. Her nose and cheeks were red from the cold. I popped out to greet her. “Hello, gorgeous.” “Well, hey there, handsome. Oh, my god. It feels so good in here,” she moaned, her head falling back a little. I took her banjo case for her. “Oh, thank you.” We walked into her bedroom together. “So, I got three heaters. They’re different sizes. I’ve got one set up here and in the kitchen. And there is a little one still in the box,” I explained as I put the case on her bed. “Edward,” she breathed my name, rubbing her hands up my back as she laid her cheek on my shoulder. “Thank you so much!” I turned so that I could wrap my arms around her waist. “My pleasure.” I leaned down to kiss her several times. Her lips were slightly salty from sweating. “I can’t tell you how nice it is to come home to a nice strong, sexy man who wants to take care of me,” she flirted, lifting on her toes to kiss my lips as her gloved hands slid underneath my shirt. My heart fluttered in my chest. “I might know how you feel, though,” I whispered as I drew her in closer to me. We kissed for just a moment. “I need to take a shower, so I can get cooking. I’ll be right back,” she promised before leaving me alone in her room. I used that time to browse the jewelry website and save my favorites. They were surprisingly cheap for cute stuff. It was the perfect Christmas gift. I was sitting on the couch when she came back into her room, wrapped in a towel with wet hair. My phone slipped from my fingers into my lap. She didn’t notice. “I have to admit, it’s nice to be able to walk from the bathroom to the bedroom and not freeze my tits off.” I chuckled. “Ah, the wonders of a twenty dollars solution.” “It was on the list,” she whined with a little laugh, pulling her towel off to dry her hair some more. Her body was perfect. I wasn’t the only one that I had been working out more. Her thighs were visibly thicker, her stomach tighter. Then she turned around and bent over to pick something out of the clothes hamper. I swallowed heavily. She wiggled her underwear on before turning around to look at me. Bella caught my expression and smirked. “What?” I quickly shook my head in embarrassment. “Oh, no. Nothing. You’re just… wet and naked.” She giggled. “What do you expect? I’m a man.” Sauntering over, she came to straddle my lap while just in her panties. Her fingers went into my hair as she kissed me, her shower-fresh skin supple against my lips. My mouth traveled down her chest, wanting to taste all of her. My mouth went to her nipple, my fingers curling around her ass. “Oh, fuck. I’m going to get nothing done today if you do that.” she moaned. “Just a minute,” I promised, kissing over to the other. I licked the water droplets from her skin, making goosebumps raise up. She flushed, her mouth opening a little. Then she giggled as she pulled away. “Aw, come back.” “I have to cook, I’m sorry,” she pouted before finally getting dressed. It was warm enough though that she could wear shorts and a thin little shirt with no bra, her perky nipples visible through the fabric. “Tell me what to do,” I told her once we stepped into the kitchen. She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times before she went to go get a peeler. I sat down at the table and started to work a shit ton of yams. Watching Bella operate in this tiny cramped space, cooking a mountain of food for an army of people while somehow still keeping it clean and organized, made me realize that she really was a professional chef. She chopped three different kinds of vegetables before I even got through my pile. When I was done, she gave me green beans to snap. She was assigning me tasks a child could do, I realized. It was about my skill level, though. She didn’t have time to teach me anything right then. I danced around the kitchen with her, helping with dishes and talking to her as we listened to music on the phone. Whenever I kissed her, she tasted like something new and delicious. Somewhere in the evening, I received a text message from Jasper. “I hope that you’re having a good day. Sorry for being abrupt earlier.” “It’s okay,” I replied. “I understand. I hope you’re doing okay, and I miss you. Call me whenever you get a chance.” The phone began to ring, and I smiled. I brought it up to my ear. “Oh, hello. What are you doing?” “Just on a smoke break. What are you doing?” I put my arms around my girlfriend’s waist from behind, resting my chin on her shoulder as I watched her cook four things on the stove at once. There were three things in the oven, two slow cookers and a pressure cooker going as well. We had to turn down the heater because it was so warm. “I am currently in a tiny kitchen in Queens, watching a very talented woman cook the most delicious looking food that I’ve ever seen. It seriously smells so good. It’s like Christmas.” “That’s because that’s what it is,” she replied to me, smiling a little. “On steroids.” “Yes,” I agreed with a laugh. “She already cooked probably twenty dishes all from scratch, and she’s still going. And we’re going to carry them all to her friend’s place before the crack of dawn so that she can cook some more.” “She sounds like a busy girl,” he replied, clearing his throat. “She’s right there, huh?” “Yup,” I pulled her to me, kissing her temple. “My best mate, Jasper,” I explained to her when she glanced back. I was sure that she could hear him on the side. “Hi, Jasper!” She called softly as she stirred browning onions in a pan, making him chuckle. “Tell her hello,” he remarked. “You seem happy. I’m glad. I just wanted to check up on you and apologize for early. It’s been a long week, you know?” I shook my head. “No, I understand. I bought you some Christmas gifts today, so watch for that in the mail,” I informed him proudly. I had gone to a swanky art supply store and went nuts. Not three doors down was a post office. It was meant to be. “Aw!” He said cheerfully. “Thank you, darling. So early.” “Well, I was out.” “Did you get me jewelry, too?” He teased, making me chuckle. “You know what? Don’t spoil the surprise. I’m sure it’s just lovely whatever it is,” he continued. I just sighed, making him laugh some. “Alright, have fun. Back to work. Kiss the misses for me.” I beamed at his request, quickly pressing my lips to the top of her head. “Consider it done. Bye, lovey.” By sunset, Bella had made several desserts, including chocolate chip cookies. They were created from the dough that she told Alice not to eat all of. I understood then why she would want to. It was fucking amazing. She offered me one warm, and then I asked for three more before I just started sneaking them like a child. She didn’t seem to mind too much. “I love them so much,” I mumbled when she caught me with a mouthful. She smirked, walking over to me so that she could lean over and kiss my lips. “I’ll make you a bunch whenever I come next. You can keep them in the freezer and bake them whenever you want.” “Thank you,” I muttered, smiling. She giggled a little. That got me thinking about the next time she would come to Los Angeles. And Christmas. I had expected to be alone and accepted it. Now, I didn’t want to be. I wanted to spend it with her. It was so late when she got finished with all the food, we decided to just stay at her place. I brought a little backpack with me so that I could change and shower in the morning. We snuggled on her tiny bed, my face pressed against her neck as I breathed her in. The sounds of New York echoed around us. “What plans do you have for Christmas?” “I was probably going to be alone. Alice and Rose are going to Texas. Demetri is going to see his in-laws as well.” I took a deep breath. “I was going to be alone, as well. But I want to spend Christmas with you. And New Years.” “I hope you don't want to go to the ball drop in Times Square because I'm not doing that.” It was so unexpected an answer that I laughed in surprise. “No. I was actually hoping you could come to spend it in California with me. We could go on that snowy weekend we were talking about. Colorado or Utah. Maybe you could spend three weeks all together?” I hadn’t thought about it much since then, but there had been so much else going on. She didn’t say anything for a second. “That's so long. I want to, but I may have to work. I've been on a roll, and I don't want it to stop.” “That's fair, but remember while you're there, we can do those videos we were talking about. You can teach me how to cook. And we can do whatever videos you want. I love your ideas, and I think you're amazing in front of the camera. You really could be a star,” I began to grasp for straws as charmingly as possible. I felt her skin heat under my lips as they moved over her ear and jaw. “I don't want to use you for money.” “One, you're not. I am. I'm making way more money off this arrangement than you are. You must realize that. And I'm already planning on increasing what you get to match Seth and Tyler if you're going to be so involved. Even though I know you're about to freak out over it,” I began right away. “I haven't looked at my bank account in a while because I kind of had a little panic attack last time. The amount freaks me out,” she said in a voice so tiny that I barely heard it. Her words confused me. “Why? I know not all of it is from the videos you've been doing with me. A lot of it is your store. And the magazines.” “Which is only because you had me on your channel. And because I took your picture,” she answered very quickly. I took a deep breath, leaning my face against the top of her head. “That's how Hollywood works, though, baby. It's called a break.” “Everything good that has happened in the past two months is because of you!” She exclaimed in an anxious rush. As soon as the words stopped, she gasped a little as if they caused her pain. That wasn’t true in the least. “Everything good that has happened in the past two months is because of your incredible talent, generous soul, and immense patience and fortitude.” “What if you go away?” Oh, no. That was never going to happen. I could understand why she thought about that. I knew where that came from. But even if it was understandable, it was painful. I squeezed her closer, holding my hands on top of hers. Part of me wished that I had brought the ring with me, just to show her just how committed I was to her and our future together. “I'm not.” “You can't say that because it's not true.” “It is true.” She began to shake with tears. “No. It's not. Everyone leaves. No one is immortal. Everyone dies. Everything is always changing. I relied on Aiden for money because I was a stupid child, and because I was an idiot, I was almost homeless again. Because we were both terrible with money. I'm not going to make that same mistake again. I can't be relying on you.” Damn, I didn’t know how to relieve that fear. I wanted her to rely on me. Maybe not for money. Of course, I would give her cash if she needed it, but I knew that she would never straight ask for it. When we worked together, I considered it just that. A job. Even if we were having fun while doing it. I tried to think of another way of going about it. “You're obviously not. Do you really think you're not working when you did that stuff with me? Or that you don't deserve to be rewarded for your work? I'm not going to short change you because you lack the self-confidence to know your worth. And your pictures are separate from me and speak for themselves. I'm not going to not shout how awesome I think you are and that everyone needs to see your work. Clearly, I'm not the only one who thinks you're a skilled artist. I'm glad I can show people, but they're looking because your art is beautiful, Bella.” She turned over to look at me. Putting my fingers on my cheeks, she bit her lip for just a moment. “How can you be this good? You can have anyone. Anyone. You are a sexy twenty-four-year-old with literally all the money in the world at this point. Why are you bothering with me?” “I don't know how you can be asking that. I really don't.” Bella’s voice cracked. “I don't know what I have to give you.” The words didn’t even make sense to me. “You don't have to give me anything. That... that's not how any of this works. What you give me is intangible and undefinable and wonderful. You are full of love and kindness in a way that makes me want to be a better man just for you.” I love you, I wanted to cry. But I knew this wasn’t the right time. I wanted the moment to be romantic. Not during a panic attack. She pressed herself to me, pushing her forehead against my heart. “Stop it, you're going to make me cry.” My hands slid up her forearms. “Please don't be down on yourself anymore. I'm going to argue with you every time until you just accept that I'm right and you're great.” Pulling back, she gazed into my eyes. Her fingers dragged over my cheeks before moving across my lips. “I think you’re more than great.” Then Bella began to kiss me tenderly. “I want you,” she said against my mouth. “Please.”  Episode Thirty-six: RingsBella had undressed already when I came out of the bathroom, lying on the bed while smoking one of the oil pens that Tyler got me for my birthday. My brain went from romance to the rubbish bin in two seconds flat. I had wanted to soothe her anxiety and give her the comfort that she needed. But as she sprawled out like a fantasy in our bed, I wanted to give her something else. As the smoke curled from her lips, it twirled and reflected the neon lights from the windows in the darkened room. Her head lulled to the side as she gazed at me. “Sorry for stealing your weed.” “No. Everything that is mine is yours. I think you might need it.” “It’s so strong,” she whispered, looking back at the ceiling. “It’s helping already.” Bella reached out and offered it to me. After removing my shirt, I came to the bed to get it from her. I laid beside her, taking a long drag. Then I coughed like a maniac. Bella giggled, rubbing my chest. “I told you that it was strong. Little hits. This isn’t your joints.” She leaned over me to get the bottle of water from the bedside table. Her breasts swung in my face. The drugs took effect shockingly fast, my body relaxing as my mind fogged. I handed it back to her with a little grimace. “I’ll check the water,” I mumbled in a raspy voice. “That’s a huge tub, it’ll take a minute,” she said as she watched me get up. My girl rolled to her side, taking another little drag. She held her head up with her palm on her temple, her fingers twisted into her hair. “This place is so beautiful. I think it’s the nicest hotel I’ve ever stayed in.” The water was only halfway up the sides, the room filling with steam. I adjusted the temperature, so it wouldn’t be too hot. Afterward, I finished getting undressed. I came to stand in the doorway. “Yeah, it might take a little while.” Her breath caught in her throat, her eyes moving from the tip of my toes all the way up my body. Bella blushed, biting my lip for a moment. “You are the most beautiful man that I have ever seen.” I wanted to hide away from her compliment. Maybe tell her it wasn’t true. I needed to be confident, though. But nothing I could hide my wild flush. “I think you might be biased,” I repeated her words from earlier in the night. She shook her head slowly, holding my gaze the entire time. “I’m not. I’m a photographer. I’ve been taught what true beauty is, so I can look for it to make my art. You are an artist and a masterpiece, all at the same time. You are perfect.” I laughed because I couldn’t help myself. Pushing my lips together, I looked away for a moment. “You are so very smooth, my darling. But you a bit of a try-hard.” Bella giggled, hopping out of bed towards me. I scooped her up into my arms, kissing her for a long pleasant moment. We made out in the bathtub until the water was cold and filthy from the soap. We crawled into bed right after, both of us tired from the day. She wore a lovely little nightgown and curled herself around me. I wouldn’t make a move on her, even if I wanted to do so desperately. She would have let me, but I felt guilty about it after spending the day with her dead husband’s family. I fell asleep quickly but woke up in the middle of the night. I felt restless, and apparently, so did Bella. Her head tossed gently back and forth to the side. Her fingers coiled into the sheets as her face scrunched. “No,” she whispered in her sleep. I kissed her temple lightly. She whimpered and turned into me. “No. No, Aiden,” she breathed. “No. Please. Don’t. Aiden. Stop. Aiden. Aiden. Aiden.” Bella began to cry, her tears dripping down her cheeks. I pulled her to me tighter. “It’s okay, love. I’m here. I’ve got you.” “I don’t want to.” “Then you don’t have to,” I answered, kissing her again and again very lightly. I just wanted the bad dreams to go away. “Edward,” she whimpered my name. She sniffed deeply, the tears still coming. “Please, Edward.” “I’m right here. Shhhh...” “Edward, I love you. Please.” She shivered all over. I began to tear up, pushing my face into her hair. “I love you, too. It’s okay, baby. I’m right here. It’s just a bad dream.” She stilled, and after a moment said, “hm?” She pulled back to look at me with her eyes open, obviously confused. “You okay?” I asked gently. “I think you were having a nightmare.” Bella nodded slowly, rubbing her eyes with one hand to get the tears out of them. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled before rolling over. I realized then that she wasn’t really awake then either. I turned over with her, spooning her back as I adjusted the blankets. She tugged my hand around her stomach and pressed it to her heart with her palm on top of mine. A second later, a tiny snore fell from her lips. That morning, I woke up with a little kiss. Bella was fully dressed and leaning over me. She brushed her fingers through my hair, gazing at me lovingly. “I’m going to practice. I’ll text you when it’s over, so I can meet you somewhere. I’ll need to get cleaned up and put my stuff away, though.” “I’ll meet you at the apartment if you like,” I offered, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. “That would be perfect. Actually, I stuck the spare keys in my purse to give you anyway,” she mumbled, looking into her massive bag. She quickly pulled them out, just a couple of keys on a single ‘I ‘heart’ NYC’ keychain. “One is for the lobby, and the other is for the apartment. Do you need anything before I go?” “No,” I smiled at her. She began to get up. “Wait! Yes, I do.” “What?” “Another kiss,” I grinned stupidly. She rolled her eyes but smirked as she crawled back onto the bed to give me one more. This kiss was far more intense. I rubbed the back of her neck, holding it for as long as she would allow me. “I’ll see you in a few hours, my darling.” “Get some more sleep,” she called to me as she went towards the door. That would not happen. I threw the blanket off of me once it closed and hurried to go get a shower. After I finally got dressed, I checked my phone. Jasper had replied to my last message. “Please, do not propose to this woman after a month, Tony. I’m serious. You can’t be this stupid.” I replied after shoving my wallet in my back pocket. “I’m not proposing tonight! I just found the right ring, and I know that I will spend the rest of my life with her.” The phone rang. I was a little surprised. It was really late there. I thought, anyway. I wasn’t sure about the time change. Jasper began talking right away. “Oi! Why- Just… what? What are you doing? It’s been a month. You are not this kind of person. You plan every moment and- and-” I laughed. “Yeah, I know. I am. This is me… planning. I’m not going to propose today or this month or even this year. But I just need to have it. I know this is the ring that I need to get my girl. I need to see it on her hand. It’s perfect.” “You don’t even know her size!” He fussed. He was a little annoyed with me and bristling for more of a fight. It was probably the first problem that popped into his head. “That’s true. But rings can be easily sized. Also, I can just ask.” “Okay, go ahead and ask her what her ring size is,” he said with extreme sarcasm. “That won’t scare her at all.” I laughed again. “Okay, maybe. Well… I could ask Alice, her best friend.” “And tell her what? Don’t you think her best friend will tell her that you’re buying her an engagement ring?” He pressed. “Or I could lie. It’s not that hard. I am an actor. I could say that it was for something else.” Pausing, I waited for him to argue some more. He grunted. “I could say it was for Christmas. ‘Hey, Al, this Eddie, um, I was going to do a bit of holiday shopping while Bella is at practice today. I don’t suppose you could help me out with sizes, huh? You know, like for clothes, shoes, jewelry or whatever’,” I quoted very casually. I heard him groan loudly. “You’re going to buy this girl an engagement ring.” “I’m going to marry this woman. So, yeah. I am. I need it.” Jasper sighed heavily. “Why now? Why do you need it? What happened?” I sat on the edge of the bed. “Yesterday, we spent all day with Aiden’s family. And they were wonderful. And I watched her with her niece, and I wanted it to be our daughter. I saw her hold our baby in my head, and it just- gah. Like, she’s just literally an angel. She so perfect that I know that she was made for me.” He began to laugh, and then he sighed again. “Crikey. You are the most dramatic cunt.” “Okay, so hear me out. We have so many things in common. Our hobbies. We enjoy everything from the same kinds of foods and music and books. And she loves food as much as I do and just knows everything that I don’t about it. She’s smart and funny, talented as hell. She’s an artist in every single way. Music, dancing, photography, singing. Bella came to New York to be on Broadway after she got her education. But it didn’t work out for her. I can give her that. I can make her a star and give her all of her dreams. And she’s amazing with kids. She is strong even though she’s gone through hell. Bella’s backbone is made of steel. This woman is everything that I’m not and in every way better than me, and if I don’t marry her, I don’t know what I’ll do with myself or what I’m doing with my life. Because she’s it, man,” I ended in a resounding huff. There was a long pause. “Well. Okay then. So, am I at least going to be invited to the wedding?” I chuckled in relief at his words. “You better be standing right beside me. You’re the only person who I care about being there besides the lovely bride herself.” “Don’t tell your sisters that.” “Okay, I’m not stupid.” He laughed genuinely at my words. “I’m going to let you go, so I can get some breakfast and go shopping. The jewelry store is right across from the hotel, so that’s easy, at least. I also need to get Bella a fucking heater. Her place is so goddamn cold.” “Well, good luck with that. Show me a picture of the ring after you get the silly thing.” I ate in the lobby, looking up where to buy supplies for the day. I also sent Alice a messaged worded almost exactly how I said it to my best friend. Just as I was finishing up, she replied by text. “Oh, sure! So, clothes: Shirts, small. Pants, 0s. Leggings and stuff, small. Pajamas, she likes huge, though. Large if they’re for comfiness. She’s a 32DD and small in panties. Shoes she’s a six. Her ears are pierced, she likes her necklaces on the longer side. Ring size five on her ring finger and six on her middle, pointer, and thumb.” I would have to buy Alice a very nice present for Christmas. She was so eager to be helpful. “Thanks!” “What are you thinking about getting her?” “Jewelry, probably.” I decided to be vague. “So, just an FYI, Bella loves this brand that’s from Texas. It’s mostly silver. She has a ton of pieces from them. Her favorite is this ring that her grandmother gave her. I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed. But it’s James Avery.” Honestly, I hadn’t noticed, other than she really enjoyed wearing it. She had said that she loved cheap costume pieces. “Oh, really?” “There aren’t any stores in NYC, though. So you’d have to order it. But it’s still a month until Christmas.” I looked up the jewelry maker she mentioned. Right away, I could see why she liked it so much. When I had a chance, I would order her something from there. “Thank you so much, that helps a lot. I think I might order her a ring. Some of these are very cute.” “Oo! Show me what you pick!” She replied. It was the second time in one day that I was told to show someone the ring I was going to buy for Bella. I smiled to myself. When I walked into the store, the salesman recognized me right away. He perked up from his spot, standing up a bit straighter. “Ah, come to buy her two more pairs?” He joked with a big smile. I chuckled nervously. “Um, actually, I was hoping that you still had the ring I looked at the other day.” He went right to it, pulling out the exact one. “She is a lovely piece. It’s sized very small, though.” Stunned, I glanced up at him. “Oh? What size?” “Five.” Laughing, I covered my mouth as I shook my head. “No, actually, it’s perfect. That’s the size she wears. She’s a tiny girl.” I cleared my throat, looking at the ring box. “May I?” “Yes, sir!” I picked up and felt the weight. It was extremely heavy in my hand. Carefully, I put it on the tip of my ring finger on my left hand. It barely made it past my nail. “How much?” He smiled as he realized that he made a sale. It was far less than I was actually willing to spend. I thought it would be more expensive. I went directly back to the room and sat at the table, just staring at it. After I sent a picture to Jasper, my phone rang again. I brought it to my ear. “Now that is a ring, Tony. Jesus. How much did you just spend?” “Around five thousand.” “I don’t know what that is in American.” “Cheap for a ring this big. Apparently, antique jewelry is the way to go. It’s a century old. You’d think it would make it more expensive,” I mumbled. “Diamonds, emeralds, platinum. It’s going to look huge on her tiny hand.” He let out a little breath. “It’s gorgeous. She’ll love it, darling. Just… promise me you won’t do it this year, at least. She seems lovely, and I know you’re in love, but be smart.” “I am,” I promised. “I won’t. I’m going to make it perfect for her and give her everything she needs. I know that she loves me now, too. It’s just a matter of time.” His breath caught, and he drew it in quickly. “She told you?” I closed the ring box with a little snap, laughing to myself some in embarrassment. “Um, well, not awake. But yes, she has. She has shouted it at my face two nights in a row in her sleep. Calling my name as she does. I think she had a nightmare about Aiden and me last night. She kept telling him no. Then she told me she loved me and needed me. She cried in her sleep. Bella is a chatty thing at night, it seems. I kind of love it.” “That’s got to make you feel good,” he concluded, but his voice was a little distressed. “Are you okay? Is something wrong?” “Oh, yeah, yeah. I’m fine, darling. Just exhausted. I should probably go. I’ll talk to you later. Have a good day.” “Oh, okay. Right. Yeah, you too, love,” I pouted. Then I remember something. “Hey, how’d your date go?” He chuckled. “Just fine. Got laid, had fun, will probably never call them again. Bye, Tony.” “Bye.” Jasper was obviously sad about something, but I didn’t understand what. He wouldn’t tell me either. I knew he was lonely in Sydney, just like I was in Los Angeles. I thought about making him the offer again, but I knew that would cause a fight. Instead, I decided that I would go out and buy him some Christmas gifts while doing my other shopping during the day.  Episode Thirty-five: PlayEsther never stopped talking. I thought that I was chatty. But it was apparent that she loved her daughter-in-law like she was her own. They joked and teased each other, laughing around the dinner table. Claire kept staring at her aunt and me, smiling brightly whenever we made any sort of contact with one another. It was actually really cute. After dinner, everyone crowded into the tiny living room to keep chatting. Mike, Bella’s brother-in-law, was a pleasant, if not a little boring, middle-aged man. He obviously had no idea who I was, or why his daughter was so excited to see me, but that didn’t seem to slow him down from making mindless chit-chat with me. I didn’t really mind, but my eyes kept flicking to the floor where my lovely girlfriend sat with her niece. They were playing with some of the makeup that I had gotten her when she was in Los Angeles. It was in a big bag in her even bigger purse. They had everything spread out in front of them, and she explained what each of them was and how best to use them. She would hold the young girl’s face delicately, praising her beauty the entire time. I wanted to watch her do these things with our daughter. It wasn’t hard to imagine her in my living room with a sweet little infant with a light tan and maybe brown eyes like hers and red hair just like me. Almost everyone in my family had red hair, the genes strong. They only achieved more unique looks with a bottle. Maybe if we were really lucky, she would have the same unique blue eye. Bella had said it was genetic. “So, do you play any sports?” Mike questioned, pulling me out of my fantasy world. I glanced at him, trying to connect all the words. It took a second. “You’d be great at basketball.” I laughed a little awkwardly. “Um, I’ve never played that much, actually. I did do some wrestling in school with my mate, Jasper. He won a bunch of championships. I was never as good as him, even though I always beat him,” I chuckled. “But I’ve got about a foot and probably fifty pounds on him, so it’s not exactly fair. And I played a bit of football as a kid. Or rather, what you Americans call soccer.” Dr. Zucker snored, coughing a little before he shifted in his spot. His wife shook her head and picked up the remote to turn the television off. “I played soccer in high school!” Ash, Aiden’s cousin, added into the conversation excitedly. “Do you watch any?” “Sometimes,” I replied, thinking back to my friends. “My mates and I used to go out to a pub and watch regularly. My brothers-in-law bloody love the sport as well, so we’d often have watch parties. But I have to admit, I usually end up on the floor with the kids,” I smiled down at my girlfriend, and she grinned in return. She had made the spotty thirteen-year-old look almost runway ready. Carefully, she smoothed a shimmering tan powder over her eyelids, holding her pinkie up in the air as she did so. “Your aunt has done my makeup too, you know,” I blurted out. The little girl looked at me in curiosity. She tilted her head to the side slightly. “Really?” Bella smirked, nodding her head. She pulled a wand from a purple tube. “I gave him fake eyelashes and everything,” she paused to paint mascara onto hers. “He looked very pretty.” Claire giggled softly, biting her lip as she glanced at me. “Why?” I shrugged a little, leaning in a bit. “I lost a bet, and I had to do it for a video. And I did look fetching. Purple is my shade. You'll see that one soon enough.” She laughed at my silliness, blushing a little. Her attention quickly went back to the makeup, though. Bella was watching me, her smile so warm and adoring. And it was all for me. I winked at her, making her flush a little as well. “Aunt Bella, can I do your makeup?” Looking over at her with a smile, she quickly nodded her head. “Of course, baby. I’m not wearing anything right now.” “So, what do we start with again?” She questioned, looking at the loot between her legs. She reached forward, pointing at a tiny tube. “Primer.” Her aunt rearranged everything so that it was in a neat row for her. “Primer first, foundation second, then concealer, blush, and powder.” My girl was a great teacher, patient and kind. She didn’t care if Claire painted her teeth three different shades and poked her in the eye more than once. Her eyelids were colored to her eyebrows. Claire didn’t stop until her mother told her that it was time for them to get ready to go. She pouted a bit, hugging Bella tightly. Whispering that she missed her, she promised to talk to her very soon. Ash, her wife, and mother all left when Helena and Mike did. “How do I look?” Bella teased as she pulled a plastic package out of her bag after all the goodbyes. She raised her overfilled eyebrows. “Am I sexy?” “You are the most beautiful woman in the world,” I swore right away without a bit of hesitation. She rolled her eyes and shook her head, thinking that I was teasing. I wasn’t. When she walked past me, she lightly brushed her fingers over my shoulder. She went into the bathroom to get cleaned up. I watched her leave with a smile. Esther looked at me knowingly. “I think that we’ll be seeing a lot more of you.” “I hope so.” She smiled a little. “Thank you for coming with Bella today. This day has been very hard on her in the past.” She paused for a moment, looking down at her long sharp nails. The words were hard for her. “The first birthday without him was just a couple of weeks after he died. She barely made it through the Shiva.” She shook her head. I had no idea what a Shiva was. Another thing to add to my list of googling when I got a chance. “She spent it in the hospital, alone.” “Hospital?” I said in surprise. The word just fell from my lips. Esther nodded, looking down grimly as she shook her head once more. “She needed some help that we couldn’t give her. She wasn’t eating or sleeping. Or talking. Bella didn’t speak a single word for two months after Aiden died. At all to anyone. Not even to poor Alice, who never left her side.” “What?” Jonah moaned as he sat up, finally waking up. He rubbed his face roughly. “What are we discussing?” “I’m telling him about Bella after Aiden died,” she whispered. She just kept shaking her head as if she was trying to dislodge the memory. “How hard it was on her. My sweet baby.” He instantly frowned. “Poor girl,” he agreed with a sigh. “She was catatonic for weeks. We were worried that she would never come back. It’s taken years.” The older woman stood from the couch. “She seems happy right now, though, and I think I know why, too.” She kissed my cheek lightly. “You’re a sweet young man. Here. Let me go get you some food to take with you.” She fluttered away before I could say anything else to her. “Well, I will be scrubbing that off forever,” Bella joked as she came back in. “Oh, good morning, Jonah. How was your nap?” She asked she picked up her purse from the floor. He yawned and stretched. “Fantastic. It was exactly what I needed before bed.” Bella giggled at his words. “You two about to head out?” “Yes, sir. I think that I should probably go feed Alice. You know she can’t survive without me,” she replied sardonically. “I’m getting you some food to take home!” Her mother-in-law shouted from the kitchen, making her smirk. “Oh, no. But will you have enough if someone shows up in the middle of the night?” She asked her dramatically. Dr. Zucker laughed under his breath as he stood from his recliner. He leaned in to whisper in her ear. “If not, there is probably six months worth of food in the freezer.” He rolled his eyes hard as he shook his head. “Come over soon and eat some of it.” “I will,” she promised. When we walked out of the front door, both of us were carrying the bags of leftovers that we were given. It was probably several meals worth for a couple of people. Bella turned to look at me. “We could wait for a car, but it’s only about a five-minute walk to the subway from here,” she explained. “I need to put this food away at the apartment. We don’t have anywhere to keep it at the hotel.” “That works,” I answered, taking her hand. The snow was piling on the grass as it drifted from the sky, but the concrete was still too warm for it to stick. We walked in silence, Bella leading the way. There were a million things going on behind her eyes. With every step closer, her tension picked up just a little. I bought one of the all-you-can-ride metro cards, catching a train within seconds of stepping onto the platform. There was almost no one around us, an elderly woman on the other side of the car. “Was that too much?” She suddenly blurted out. Her eyes were wide with anxiety. I looked at her in surprise. “What? It was an overall, very nice day. Very wholesome. I gained ten pounds, I think.” I patted my gut. “They seem lovely. They love you very much and only want you to be happy.” “Thank you.” She suddenly embraced me, her face shoving into my neck. “For today. I didn't even ask. It all just kind of happened.” I held her back, squeezing her tightly. “Did you get what you needed?” She didn’t say anything for a long minute, finally tilting her head back to look at me. “I think so. I feel better than I did this morning. This isn't how you wanted to spend your vacation, though, I'd imagine.” “It's exactly how I wanted to spend it. With you.” She pressed her face into my shoulder, closing her eyes. She didn’t say anything else, and I had too much on my mind. I thought about the day and everything that I had been told. It was an overwhelming amount of new information about her. All of it just endured me to her even more. I wasn't surprised that Bella had a breakdown after Aiden. It had obviously torn her apart in a way that I could not imagine. My heart broke for her, and I wanted to cry. For her pain and suffering, her loneliness and fear. Dr. Zucker had warned me against hurting her, but I don’t think there was any kind of torment that she hadn’t already gone through. “Food,” Bella shouted as soon as we walked in the front door of her apartment. Both her roommate and the cat answered. Patty shrieked as she came skittering down the hall. “What kind?” Bella took the other bag from me. “Esther cooked for Aiden's birthday.” “Is there matzo balls?” Alice appeared in t-rex pajamas that had a hood. I hadn’t been expecting it. She had seemed so professional before. But this made her look like a very cute twelve-year-old. “Yup. And she gave me a whole loaf of homemade challah. Brisket. There are a few kinds of cookies. Apple cake with honey frosting. You know how she does.” She did a little dance, taking one of the bags from her grip before trotting towards the kitchen. “Fuck yes. I was about to order soup. Are you going to practice tomorrow?” She nodded her head. “Yeah, I need to.” Then something popped into her head. “Would you mind bringing my gear with you so that I don't have to haul it to the hotel and back?” “Sure. I'm going to take a Lyft anyway. I have a half off code. Put it on your bed, so I know that I'm taking the right stuff.” Bella grinned, dusting off her hands as she finished putting the food away. “Okay. Thanks.” She took my hand and led me back to her bedroom. Once again, I sat as I watched her gather her supplies for the next day. She pulled a large case from underneath the bed, reaching over to pick up the banjo. “Will you play for me?” Without saying anything else, she started to strum a tune that I knew right away. It was ‘The Rainbow Connection.’ Her fingers expertly danced over the strings. And then she began to sing. My heart was going to explode out of my chest. It went a million miles an hour. She did it perfectly, every note exact. Her voice was airy and soft. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from her for even a second. When she finished, her roommate clapped from the other room as she continued to heat up her food. Bella rolled her eyes and shook her head hard as she began to put the banjo away into the case. “It is filthy just how wildly talented you are. You should be the one going on Broadway.” Alice leaned against the door as she looked into the room. “You know that's why she came here, right? She wanted to be in the theater.” She blew on her food several times, stirring it with the too big silver spoon before trying some. It was still too hot, though. Oh. I was stupid for not even thinking about that earlier. Bella would have been perfect on Broadway. She could sing, dance, play instruments, and command an audience with charm and grace. Certainly, I couldn’t be the only person who saw that. I couldn’t understand why she wasn’t a starlet. She didn’t look up as she finished her work. “That's why a lot of people move here, and like most, I wasn't good enough. It wasn't for me, anyway. I was just too young to know that at the time.” Quickly, I shook my head. “I don't know. I think you'd be great. I think you could be a star.” I was going to do that. Somehow, I was going to give my girl the fame she wanted when she was younger. She was beyond talented, and it was a shame that no one had noticed before then. But I could give Bella her every dream, starting with that one. We could make this journey together. My girlfriend shook her head, her face blank. “I mostly like being behind the camera. And you two are both intensely biased. One of you wants to sleep with me, and the other is dating me.” I tried not to laugh at her bad joke, and it came out as a snort. Her best friend looked so unimpressed, turning a little red in the face before flipping her off. It sounded like something Jasper would say. When we got back to the hotel, she turned to look at me. “Would you like to take a bath with me?” “Yes, I’d love to. Let me run to the loo, and I’ll start the water,” I offered, kissing her cheek as I went to the bathroom for a private minute. When I did, I checked my phone. Jasper had sent me a couple of messages, but I didn’t want to be rude and text in front of Bella’s inlaws. I wanted to make a proper impression. “How’s it going? I’m going to assume good since you’re not answering. You’re probably too busy fucking and eating pizza for me.” “Actually, we went to the cemetery and spent the day with her inlaws. It was Aiden’s birthday today. She didn’t tell me until yesterday, and she wasn’t going to. She was going to suffer alone, so I’m glad that I showed up when I did. I think that she needed me.” “Jesus, poor girl. Is she okay?” “Yeah, she seems to be. Quiet, but that’s understandable.” My phone beeped in my hand. “And how are you?” “I’m great, actually. I’ve decided something.” “What’s that?” “I’m going to buy an engagement ring tomorrow.”  Episode Thirty-four: Claire“So, what do you do, young man?” Dr. Zucker asked casually as we walked back inside. “I’m an actor and writer,” I explained quietly. He chuckled to himself. “That makes sense. That girl is a ball of creativity and energy. I hope that you can keep up.” “Me too,” I chuckled as well. “It’s already a bit of a struggle, even with the advantage of being a little younger.” Patting my shoulder firmly, he smirked a little. “Lucky boy.” 'Unbelievably so.” In the small hallway foyer that led to the living room, there were dozens of framed pictures. The older man kept going as I stopped to inspect them. Bella was in so many of them, alone and with her husband. Then I saw a wedding photo of the two. I hadn’t yet. Bella looked so incredibly young and even smaller somehow. Jealousy suddenly swirled through me. I hated that Aiden cheated on her. There was no way that I could ask about it either, not without hurting her. I would never do that to her. The idea of being with someone else behind her back actually made my heart hurt. In my head, I joked about threesomes, but I wanted to play with her. Not with someone else. Bella came around the corner, watching me. I smiled briefly, licking my lips as my eyes turned back to the pair surrounded by a crowd. The dress that she was wearing made her look like a princess from a 2000s teen-movie. “He looks really happy,” I remarked softly. She snorted very delicately, shaking her head. “I look terrified. It's a good picture of him, though.” Bella touched the photo for a moment before pointing to another. “I like this one better. We were on our honeymoon in Mexico on the beach. You can't tell it in this photo, but I have the worst rash on my back. I was miserable the entire time. Still, I have no idea why I had a rash.” My poor girl had the worst kind of luck. “Oh no,” I mumbled as I smoothed my hand up her spine slowly. She took my arm, and we went into the living room to another wall. Every single picture was of her late husband. I recognized Bella’s style in a lot of them. She pointed to one of them. “This is about a month before he died. He looks like a small straight Anderson Cooper,” she giggled impishly before her breath caught a little. Her eyes were visibly red from trying not to cry. “Are you doing okay?” She nodded, turning so that she could wrap her arms around my waist. “Yeah. Thank you for being here today and being so wonderful.” I leaned down to kiss the top of her head. I had done nothing but sit by her side. If this was wonderful, then she had a very low bar for greatness. Closing my eyes, I breathed her in. “Young man, do you like beer?” I looked up, glancing up towards the kitchen to answer her father-in-law. “Yes, sir.” “They like you,” Bella whispered as she looked up at me. Her smile was precious, obviously very pleased. “Good.” She led me back into the kitchen, sitting me down at the table beside him while she went to the fridge to fetch us both one. Opening each, she sat one down in front of me with a kiss on the temple. Dr. Zucker looked Bella over and smiled at her. “You’re looking very fit, young lady.” “That’s what I said!” His wife agreed loudly from in front of the stove. “She’s been lifting weights. Can you believe it? The tiny thing.” He chuckled. “Great! It’s good for you. Keep it up.” “It’s actually quite impressive,” I informed them, taking a sip of my own beer. If she could brag about me, I could do so about her. “My best mate is into weight lifting, and I was telling him how much she can bench, and he wants to see it. I may have to film it to prove it.” Bella flushed, looking away from me. “It’s not that impressive.” “I’m pretty sure that you could bench press Esther,” I teased. Her father-in-law let out of a big laugh. “I’d love to see what.” He winked at his wife over the table. “But she’s light as a feather, so it can’t be too hard.” Ah, he was a smooth old man. She clicked her tongue at him and rolled her eyes as she went back to work on cooking. Once Bella was done with her drink, she began to help again too. The conversation kept up steadily until an explosion of noise burst through the front door. Three people, a couple and their teenage daughter, came stomping in from the cold. They shook off the snow, hanging up their coats. The girl shrieked loudly when she saw my little girlfriend, pushing past her parents to come colliding in for a hug. She was already taller than her by a couple of inches. “Aunt Bella!” “Hey, girly! I missed you.” She squeezed her back, looking at her lovingly. “I missed you, too.” “Have you been using your birthday gifts I got you?” Bella played with her thick curly hair, the girl gazing at her like she was the most fantastic person on the planet. “She's been using them every day,” a woman that I recognized from the pictures on the wall said with a little annoyance. The middle-aged man went to go get a drink wordlessly, looking like he was already done with the day. Her niece frowned. “Mommy made me wipe it off before we came. She said it looked bad.” The girl’s mother rolled her eyes. “That because you don't know what you're doing yet.” Tilting her head to the side, Bella toyed with one of her curls for just a moment. “I have my makeup bag in my purse. I can teach you how to do some subtle looks your mom will like.” “Yas!” The girl jumped up, putting her hands above her head before she began to floss. I smirked to myself, trying not to giggle at her reaction. It was adorable. Bella’s sister-in-law kind of sighed to herself, shaking her head at her daughter. “After dinner. It looks like Grandma is almost done. Go wash your hands.” When the little girl rolled her eyes, she looked just like her mom. Her father went into the living room to have a beer and watch sports with his father-in-law. She marched past them. “Yes, ma'am.” Ash, Aiden’s cousin, returned with another woman her own age and an elderly woman that looked like a much older Dr. Zucker in a wig. Esther was still at the stove, busily cooking. She turned, shaking her wooden utensil as she did. “Helena, come meet Bella's new gentleman, Edward,” she shouted, barely missing giving her a smack in the mouth with it. She just ducked. Surprised, she turned to look at me. She shook my hand quickly. “Hi! I know you. Have we met before?” “Probably haven't met,” Bella answered for me as she embraced the ancient woman. She hugged back, patting her cheek before going to get an apron. My girl smirked at me. “I'm telling you, ‘gentleman’ is the way to go.” Her sister-in-law ignored her, cocking her head to the side as she stared at me really hard. She shook her head in confusion. “Really? Are you sure we haven't met? Maybe at one of those parties you used to have? Those were so much fun.” Laughter echoed in the living room, the television blaring with sports. Bella’s niece came out of the bathroom, greeting her other aunt. Flailing her spoon again, Esther turned to look at us at the table. “Maybe you saw him on the Facebook, dear.” My girlfriend was leaning against the doorway, her arms crossed over her chest as she watched the chaos that was unfolding around us. The girl came sneaking in behind her, leaning in to whisper something in her ear that I couldn’t hear. She replied, pointing to the table. The only thing that I caught was ‘don’t make a mess.’ “Okay!” Claire responded happily, skipping into the middle of the kitchen. I watched her with amusement. Then she caught my gaze. I knew instantly that she recognized me because all the color drained from her face before it went fantastically red. Her fingers curled up at her sides as she shrieked like an Elvis fan in the fifties. “What the hell?” Her father demanded from the living room, not that he got up to see what the sound was. “OH, MY GOD! You're Eddie! Mommy! No way! Oh, my god, oh my god, oh my god! Why are you in my grandma's kitchen!?” She screamed before her eyes got wide with horror, and she lowered her voice. “Wait, you are Eddie, right?” It was so hard not to giggle. Everyone was looking at us. Esther shook her head, totally baffled as to why she was reacting that way. “His name is Edward, dear. He's Aunt Bella's friend. And don't use the Lord's name in vain, please. It's not nice.” With every bit of strength in her tiny body, she flung herself at me so that she could hug me. Her arms went around my neck, her baby powder perfume smacking me in the face as she did. Embracing her in return, I lightly patted her shoulder blade. Her grip tightened. “Wow,” I kind of laughed, squeezing her back. It wasn’t the first time I had a fan fling herself at me, child or adult. It was just always shocking. I invariably felt a little awkward at the contact, but I was never going to make a fan, especially a kid, feel bad because I was a nervous person. I could feel my cheeks heating by the second as everyone still stared at me. Her niece was vibrating in place against me. “I watch all your videos! Every single day after school! Can I take a picture? I love you so much.” “Yeah, of course. I don't mind.” It took a half-second for her to pull her phone out of her pocket. With my arm still around her, I automatically smiled. She took about two dozen in three seconds flat before literally jumping in place. Obviously, I had made her very happy. All the while, Bella watched me with a smile. “See, I was expecting more of that,” she insisted as she waved her finger at the girl. She finally turned her attention away from her phone. “I told you, Mommy, that Aunt Bella was on YouTube!” She turned to look at Bella. “She said it was probably not you. How many people are named Bella Swan, though? Um, basically, no one.” I pushed my lips together to keep from laughing at her attitude. She reminded me of my nieces so much, and I already adored her feisty little attitude. I hoped that one day she would be able to meet my girls because I think that they would all get along very well. My girlfriend was grinning mischievously. “She must have not actually watched the videos. But that's okay. You know, anyone can be on YouTube. I'm pretty sure I'm in probably a few other videos somewhere for something. Probably for CFA. I have some of me playing and singing, I bet.” Well, I was absolutely going to have to look for that somehow. I hadn’t thought about looking for her on YouTube. I figured that she would have told me about it. But if she played music or danced on stage as she said, there were probably lots of videos around. I just had to figure out how to find them. Then I smiled to myself when I remember what video was going to be posting for the day. It was one of the best that I have ever made for the channel. Editing that particular one was probably the greatest thing that I did when I was away from my little sassy love. “I posted my favorite video that I've made with your aunt so far, just today. Do you know which?” I inquired playfully, smirking at her. I knew that she didn’t, but I wanted to see her guess. She scrunched up her nose, biting her bottom lip as she considered it for a moment. “The cake place? Or maybe the Hawaiian pancakes and chicken? I don't know. They were all fun. My favorite is the Halloween one, I think. Maybe. Of the ones I’ve made with you, I mean.” I loved her answer. She was right, they were all fun. I shouldn’t have been surprised that the haunted zoo was her favorite. The entire day was incredible, though. It was, perhaps, one of the happiest days of my life. All because of her. I decided to tease her a bit. Leaning into the girl, I made my expression pouty. “The spicy wing flight. Your aunt was so mean to me.” She playfully and loudly gasped, acting as if I had just said something horrible about her in a bad soap opera. Her eyelashes fluttered as her nose lifted in the air. “He's such a baby.” Looking between us, I saw her niece’s eyes narrow. “Are you dating him? In the videos, it looks like you're dating. The fandom isn't sure.” The word fandom associated with me in any way made me want to die a little inside for some reason. I knew that there were fans, and that was cool. I knew that there were people who followed all my stuff. But the idea that there was a ‘fandom’ was insanity. “You can tell the fandom we are. If that's okay with you, miss.” The girl looked between us before throwing her hands up into the air once more and flossed. “O.M.G., I have to tell everyone,” she mumbled to herself before she ran off in some unknown direction. Bella watched her with a little smirk. Our eyes met, and both sets got wider. She walked over to the table, fixing the chair that the little girl had knocked to the side when she hugged me. Sitting beside me, Bella took my hand. “Well, she’s adorable,” I whispered, leaning into her a little. Giggling, Bella nodded her head as she pressed a kiss to my cheek. “Thank you for being so sweet to her,” she breathed as she brought her fingers up to my jaw, drawing her nails over it. I couldn’t resist kissing her lips lightly. It was just a peck. “My pleasure, love.”  Episode Thirty-three: FamilySo, somehow, I ended up in the kitchen of my love’s first husband’s childhood home. When I decided that I would do anything for her to make her feel better, I hadn’t expected it would lead us here, but obviously, it was what she needed. “Esther, what did you do?” She giggled when she got inside the tiny kitchen. I felt too big for the house. Like Gandalf in a hobbit hole. “Everyone is coming over today, and then they're coming over on Thursday for Thanksgiving as well. I'm sure someone will show up on Wednesday. They always do. You have to be prepared for guests. Let me start some coffee. Do you want coffee? Have you ever eaten Jewish food, Edward?” Mrs. Zucker said so quickly that the words sort of blended together. She was aflutter with excitement. I was surprised that she was taking so kindly to me, but I was going to suck up as much as possible. “I'd love coffee. No, ma'am. I don't think I've ever had the chance.” Aiden’s mother went beside her daughter-in-law and grabbed an entire thick chunk of her side. “You are too thin. You're not eating enough. Have you lost weight?” Bella frowned. “I've gained ten pounds actually. I've been lifting weights. Muscle is leaner than fat.” “Auntie, leave her alone. She looks great,” his cousin called as she got a drink. “She does, but she's so tiny. Doesn't lifting weights make you bulky? Give me a muscle. Show me your arm.” I wondered if she was showing off for me, or if this was how she was usually. She squeezed Bella’s muscle. She was lean but strong. “Oh! You are very muscular. Have you two been going to the gym together? You both seem very healthy.” She expectantly looked at me. I sat down at the offered chair. “We have worked out together, but I actually live in Los Angeles. So, it's not every day.” Her eyes got big. “Los Angeles! How exciting. How on earth did you two meet?” Then she turned to Bella. “Sweetie, get your gentleman some food. You know where everything is. How long have you been dating?” She sat down across from me, folding her hands in front of her. My brain sort of went, ‘Oh shit.’ My girlfriend smirked prettily at me. She was definitely amused. “She doesn't have to get me anything,” I responded quickly. “I don't mind,” she replied, almost playfully light. “Let's see, it looks like we have some plain and everything bagels. So I'm sure there are cream cheese and lox.” “And, onions and capers, too. Or, jelly if you like it sweet,” she paused, shaking her head. “If I had known you hadn't had breakfast, I would have made you some blueberry blintz. Those are Bella's favorite.” Aw, I was kind of sad that we missed those too. I liked blueberries. Bella rolled her eyes. “I think you have enough already cooked. It looks like there is also sufganiyot. It's a Jewish doughnut will jelly. Strawberry? Or Raspberry?” She questioned. “I did them with some cranberry jelly. I used your recipe you gave me that Aiden loved so much.” As soon as the words came out of Esther's mouth, Aiden’s cousin rushed to get one, and so did Bella. “Yes, please. Oh, my God,” she moaned in delight. “Language,” her mother-in-law chided her gently. “Goodness. Oh, my goodness. It's superb, Esther,” Bella murmured with a little smile. “Bagel or doughnut?” She didn’t give Bella a chance to answer. “Just get him both dear, so he can try them,” Esther remarked before I could as she stood. “You didn't say how you met or how long you've been dating?” Well, she was a persistent little woman. “We've been together just a month now,” I sputtered out awkwardly. She brought me a mug of coffee to drink. Nodding her head, she patted the top of my hand lightly. “Oh, so it just started. I see. I wondered why I haven't heard about you yet, but that makes sense. I'm glad she didn't wait too long.” Bella stopped what she was doing, looking at her mother-in-law in confusion as she crossed her thin arms over her chest. “Shouldn't it bother you that I'm bringing a new man to your home on your son's birthday?” Esther looked at her like she was stupid, pulling her chin in towards her chest as she smirked. “No, baby. It's fantastic. Now, how did you meet?” My girlfriend sort of raised her eyebrows as she looked away, shaking her head to herself. Then she brought a smile to her face. “I was hired to take his picture for one of the magazines that I work for. Vaudevillian. I flew to LA and got to stay with him for a week, and we hit it off right away. Edward is an actor.” “Oh! How interesting! Well, that makes sense, too. She has so many friends who are performers and artists.” She made her daughter-in-law’s coffee in a big mug and handed it to her wordlessly. A moment later, Bella brought me an assorted breakfast for us to share. She sat beside me. Bringing my hand to her shoulder, I squeezed it gently as I thanked her. Her answering smile was so gorgeous. “What have you been in? I thought you looked familiar, but I thought you might just be one of her friends that I've seen before. I'm sorry if that's rude,” Ash piped up curiously. She was sitting across the table from us as she played with her coffee drink. “No, it's fine.” I actually preferred that people didn’t recognize me when I was out. It felt awkward. “I'm kind of just starting out, really. I've only been in a couple of bigger movies so far. Last year I was in Night Hunter, and this year, I was in a movie called Golden Spy. I'm more of a voice actor, though. I've done a few cartoons and video games,” I explained to her in a rush. “That's so fascinating!” The older woman answered. “I saw Night Hunter in the theater with my wife. She loves those killer thriller type movies. Who were you in it?” She asked, looking at my face as she tried to figure it out. I actually flushed a little under the attention. “I was the one who got his head shot off about halfway through.” “Oh... yeah…” She trailed off before nodding. “Yeah, I remember you. That's cool! That scene was so gross, though,” she replied through a bite of pastry. “He was just training for a movie the past couple of weeks. He's going to be a henchman with a name next month. He gets to kill Jodie Foster,” Bella declared proudly, repeating the words that I had told her in the bathtub. “Yes. Henchman with a name. Yeah.” I chuckled worriedly. “I'm pretty excited. It's the biggest part I've had where people actually see my face. I'm a little nervous,” I admitted to them. Bella adoringly looked up at me. “Everyone might not know your face, but everyone will know your voice soon enough.” It made my heart skip a beat. I pressed my forehead against her, wanting to kiss her but didn’t because we were in front of people. “You have far too much faith in my abilities, darling.” She looked over at her mother-in-law, still leaning into me. “He's being modest. He has a Grammy.” She glanced up at me again. “I've been reading that your work in Beyond the Hollow is in the running for an Emmy.” Bella turned back to Esther. “Beyond the Hollow is a cartoon series,” she explained. “I know that one! Claire watches it! She made me watch it with her on her tablet,” Esther replied cheerfully. My girlfriend took my hand on the table and gave it a tight squeeze as she looked into my eyes. “It's just a matter of time before you get an Emmy for your voice work. Your Disney Pixar movie will undoubtedly be nominated for some sort of Oscar. At the very least in the animated category. We just need to get you on Broadway next, and you're halfway to your EGOT.” God, she really did love me if she thought that I could do all of those things. It made me happier than I could put into words. “I need you to understand how terrible you are for my ego. Just awful. I am going to be a beast if you don't stop. Just...” I made the sound of a balloon filling up and popping, my fingers around my head. She just giggled. “Nah. You need the encouragement.” Esther was happy to talk and talk. We were there for hours as she even started preparing dinner. Bella often helped, as did Ash, until she left to fetch some more people who were going to join us later in the evening. My girl looked so much happier than she did in the morning. No matter how awkward I felt, it was worth every single second. We stopped chatting for a moment when we heard the front door open. Bella was standing in the entryway between the kitchen and living room. She turned and smiled at whoever came in. Then she went to them, though I couldn’t see. There was a quiet conversation that I couldn’t hear as well. After a few minutes, she returned and was followed by a short, skinny, older man. He stopped to look at me, making a face. “Who are you?” Mrs. Zucker was beaming at him. “This is Edward. He's Bella's new gentleman.” “I really like the term gentleman. I am too old for a boyfriend,” my girlfriend said mischievously. I rolled my eyes and shook my head as I stood from the table. “No, you're not.” I shook the man’s hand. I assumed it was her father-in-law, Dr. Zucker. “Hello, sir. Nice to meet you.” He analyzed me slowly, his eyes looking me up and down. “Aren't you a tall one? You don't buy your clothes at Penny's.” “No, not usually. I have a lot of stuff tailored to me. A lot of special ordered stuff,” I explained, too shocked to say anything else. I wasn’t even sure what Penny’s was, but I wasn’t going to admit that. “He's twice your size.” The man waved a finger between Bella and me. She didn’t like the teasing much, scrunching up her face. “No. He is one and a third of my size. I'm not a midget. Mrs. Esther is an inch shorter than me without the hair. Make fun of her.” He looked shocked that she would even suggest such a thing. “No. I can't make fun of my wife.” Bella actually snorted loudly. “That's a lie.” I smiled to myself when I realized that this was how she was with her family. She might have felt like an outsider, but clearly, they didn’t see herself that way. She would fit perfectly in with my own. I couldn’t wait for them to meet them one day. “Why don't you come to help me, young man? I need to bring some things in from the car,” Dr. Zucker suggested abruptly, looking me straight in the face. There was no turning him down. “Yes, sir,” I answered right away. He nodded his head, quickly turning on his heels, and I followed him outside. “So,” the man began as soon as the front door was closed behind us. “I hope you know that was bullshit and that there is nothing in the car that I need help with.” I laughed at his bluntness. “No, I kind of figured. Though, I thought you’d find something for me to carry. Make me work for it a little.” “No, I’m an honest man if I can be. And I’m going to be honest with you right now. I just want to get something straight with you.” He pointed towards the house. “That woman in there, she’s a good girl.” “She is. The best,” I agreed with him promptly. He looked me over. “So, you’re really dating her?” He questioned, licking his bottom lip. “Yes,” I nodded in response. “Yes, sir. I am.” The older gentleman pursed his mouth a little. “And how old are you?” “I’m twenty-five,” I replied. It was close enough. I suddenly felt very young in front of his tiny old man who looked like the pictures of Aiden that Bella had shown me. “Ah, a young one. I’m not shocked. Bella needs someone who can keep up with her.” He nodded his head, considering his words for a long moment. “I have to admit, I was surprised when she settled for Aiden. He could barely-” The man shook his head and sighed very heavily before looking at me very seriously for a moment. “I have to say that my son didn’t deserve her. Sadly.” I didn’t know what to say. He meant it when he said that he was going to be honest. “I’m not sure that I do either.” He shook his head, not looking up at me but the sky as the snow continued to fall. “My wife never saw the flaws in our boy. Typical Jewish mother. But he was a selfish man. Self-centered and often cold. Spoiled. He could be cruel if he didn’t get his way. And Bella often suffered because of it. And…” He licked his bottom lip again. “I caught him out with other women during his marriage. More than once. I don’t know if Bella knows, but I’ll never tell her. Or my wife. Nor will you.” Oh, he was going to give me the brutal, unfiltered truth. “She said that she had a good marriage,” I breathed out quietly. “That’s because when that girl loves someone, she does with her whole heart no matter what. Even if it breaks her. She’s suffered enough, though. So, I’m going to give you a warning. The warning my son deserved, but I couldn’t give him because it would upset his mother.” He narrowed his eyes on me. “If you hurt my sweet little daughter, I will fuckin’ kill you. I will drug your sorry ass, take your limp body down to the hospital, and cut it up into little manageable pieces while you’re still breathing before I throw them into the human waste incinerator. I was a soldier before I was a doctor, and I’ve killed men before. And I’m willing to do it again if I have to. Do I make myself clear?” “Holy fuck,” I mumbled to myself. “Uh, yes. Crystal clear, sir. I swear, I have no intention of hurting her, and if I do, I’ll come straight to you because I won’t be able to live with myself anyway.” “Good,” he nodded his head once more. “I realize that we’ve just met, and I’m a stranger, but she wouldn’t bring you home if it weren’t serious between you. I figured that it was best to get the unpleasantness out of the way to start.” I sort of chuckled. “I can respect that. I feel like it’s serious, but it’s only been a month.” “You’re in love with her already,” he said appraisingly, his eyes looking me over again. He pegged me right away. I nodded my head. “She’s a lovely girl. You’re lucky that she’s chosen you.” “I am,” I agreed. “I fell in love with her instantly. I haven’t told her yet, though. I don’t think that she’s ready for it. Especially right now. I just want her to be happy.” “Good. That’s what we want, too.” He patted my shoulder firmly. He leaned against the side of his car, looking off into the street as he wrapped his arms around himself. “My boy fell for her instantly, too. He told me after they got married. They used to visit the same coffee shop a lot. He told me that the first time he saw her, he knew that she was his wife. It took him a month to say hello, he was too nervous. Another two months before he somehow got her to agree to go out to the movies with him.” “She hasn’t told me how they’ve met yet. We’ve talked about him some, but I think that it hurts her. She’s like me, if it doesn’t feel good, it’s just best not to speak about it at all. I hope that one day, she can trust me enough to tell me all of her stories.” I couldn’t look at him as I said it. “That’s good. Be that kind of man for her. Aiden wasted that precious gift, that trust. He forgot his vows as a husband. If you make that kind of commitment to her, you better not. There isn’t any other man to look out for her, so it’s my job, but I’m happy to do it because she’s my daughter now. And she always will be.” “I won’t,” I swore. “I won’t hurt her.” “Great. Because you’re a big boy, and it would be a pain in the ass to drag you,” he mumbled jokingly as he went back towards the house.  Episode Thirty-two: FeelsI knew that I should have been asleep. I was exhausted, but my body was wound up so tightly that I couldn’t relax. Bella was against my side, her head resting on my shoulder and her wild hair all around us. It was cold in New York, but we were under a few blankets, so she wasn’t bothered. Our nude bodies were tangled together, her hand on my stomach and my arm around her back. There was the sweetest smile on her lips. I missed her so damn much. Even being around her asleep was terrific. I didn’t want to miss a second of it. Gently so as not to wake her, I began to play with her hair. Her smile grew. The city lights were rather bright outside the glass door. We had forgotten to close the curtains, and it was casting streaks of red, blue, and white over her delicate features. I could actually see her eyes move behind her eyelids, her lashes fluttering in her very deep slumber. She was dreaming. “Eddie,” she breathed my name. I smiled to myself, leaning down to lightly kiss her forehead. Her fingers curled against my stomach, and she sighed. “Edward.” Bella had moaned very quietly and sighed in her sleep, but she had never spoken before. I loved that it was my name. It made me feel special. I wondered if she spoke often or if she even knew that she did it at all. It was so cute. I pondered what sweet things she was dreaming about. It was obviously something pleasant. Her breath caught in her throat, her back arching a little so that she pushed herself closer to my side. Her head rolled back onto my shoulder as her lips parted. I grinned, wondering if she was having a sex dream. I had plenty about her, so it was only fair. “Edward,” she whimpered, pushing her face more into my arm as she did. “I love you. Edward. Edward.” This time it was my turn for my breath to catch. I wasn’t sure if I heard what I thought I did. She was obviously asleep. Her leg drew up my thigh, her smooth calf dragging over mine as her hand moved up my chest. She whimpered again, biting her lip. Her chest heaved before her mouth pushed together, and her brow furrowed. “Say it again,” I begged very quietly. “Eddie.” Bella drew her head back again so that her mouth was uncovered. “I love you!” She nearly shouted in my face. Laughing despite myself, I could have cried. Honestly, I was so happy. I didn’t care if she wasn’t actually saying it to me out loud. She was dreaming about it. She was dreaming about telling me the words. Just like I had about telling her. In the day and in the night. “Shh,” I hushed gently, rubbing her cheek lightly with my fingers before pushing her hair back over her ear. Gingerly so as not to wake her, I kissed her forehead again. “I love you,” I whispered. “I will always love you.” My girlfriend curled more into me, her hand moving to my neck. She tilted her face up and managed to kiss my lips, still very much asleep. “Mm… Edward, love you.” She kissed me again but got my chin. I smiled wildly. “So much.” “Good. Now, tell me when you’re awake, please,” I chuckled, moving my hand over her jaw to drew her into a kiss on the lips again. She pecked at me three more times. “Okay,” she answered before rolling over to her side with her tiny body still pressed against mine. Bella reached behind her and groped at my hip in the hopes of getting me to spoon with her, I think. I happily obliged, straightening the blankets around her so that she wouldn’t get cold. “Butt snuggles,” my sweet girl mumbled when we both got comfortable. She obviously enjoyed this position as much as I did. I laughed a little again. She didn’t like the rumbling because she nestled in deeper, grabbing my arm and tightening it around her waist. She then let out an adorable tiny huff. Her black curls were literally covering her entire face, her nose barely sticking out of the mess. Carefully, I adjusted it for her. She was smiling as I did. I brought my lips to her ear. “I love you, too. I’m going to marry you.” She nodded her head solemnly. “Okay.” And then let out a tiny snore. Well, I wasn’t going to sleep soon, but at least I was going to have something lovely to think about while I laid there with her in my arms. When I finally did, it was with my face purposefully shoved into her hair so that I could breathe her in completely. When I woke up, I was alone. Glancing over at the bathroom door, I saw that the light was on. I waited a long time to see if she came out, but after fifteen minutes, I began to worry. Quietly, I walked up to the door. I was going to knock, but then I heard the crying. When I opened it just for a peek, I found her sitting nude on the edge of the bathtub, weeping with her face in both of her hands. She was almost curled in on herself, her legs shaking. There was a robe hanging up on a hook on the door, so I grabbed it and gently wrapped it around her so that she wouldn’t get cold, at least. Bella pressed her moist cheek against my stomach, so I lightly began to play with her hair in the hopes of soothing her. It seemed to work. Flicking on the shower, I adjusted the water’s temperature. “Let's get washed up, okay? We'll pick up some flowers on the way, yeah?” “Yeah.” She nodded her head slowly, her voice barely an echo in her chest. Her eyes seemed so hollow, red-rimmed, and crusted with dried tears. I couldn’t imagine her pain. The thought of losing Bella was torture, to the point where I couldn’t even consider it. Her death would be my own. Slowly, I brought her to her feet. “Then we can do whatever you need to. I wish you had told me, so I could have made sure to be here for you. I would have moved heaven and earth to not let you feel this way alone,” I said with a sigh. All I wanted was for her to trust me so that I could help her. In any way that I could. “You shouldn't have to go through this. It's not your problem to deal with.” That wasn’t true in the least. Her problems were mine, too. “Well, that's your opinion, love. It's wrong and stupidly self-sacrificing, but you are entitled to it, I suppose.” I reached under the water to see if it was ready for us. It almost was. I heard her scoff beside me, hugging the robe to her neck. “We've been together a month, Eddie. Just a month.” I wanted to say, so fucking what? That doesn’t change the fact that I love you and want to be there for you. But she didn’t know that yet, and it was definitely not the right day to tell her. “That doesn't change the fact that I want to be here for you, whether you think you need the support or not,” I told her instead. “Which you do, by the way. That doesn't make you less strong or capable. You don't have to be the stoic one all the time.” I would have never realized the date was approaching, though it had obviously been weighing on her mind. She was going to hide her pain from me, which I hated. “Stoic? That's a nice way of saying kind of a cold bitch,” she countered bitingly, nibbling aggressively at the edge of her thumb. Her anxiety was making her feisty, but I wasn’t going to let it get to me. Or her. I moved her hand away so that I could kiss the red sore spot that she had already created. “Don't do that. It's okay to be sad. You're not a bitch. You're calm and collected, and that's good, but not at the cost of your mental health. Don't keep things like this to yourself. I want to know everything.” I brought my palm to her face, her mismatched eyes worriedly looking up at me. Lightly, I kissed her forehead. Her full pouty bottom mouth stuck out a bit as it quivered, her cheeks blotchy and sticky. I had never seen her more innocent. “And I know this is a serious moment, but I need you to know that when you cry, you stick your bottom lip out, and it's stupidly cute. It gives me feels,” I mumbled with my cheek still against her forehead. She laughed lightly as I hugged her to me. “Something is wrong with me. I'm sorry.” This was not the right time to be a bumbling moron. “No, you're the best,” she whispered back. I decided to take care of Bella in every possible way that I could. She needed to be spoiled so that she could forget about her sadness for even a second. She barely spoke when we stopped at the store. I could see in her eyes that she was barely coasting by, holding my hand and letting me lead the way when I could. It was so fucking cold that the ground was rock hard. Even the grass was hardened little spikes. The weather said there was a decent possibility of snow in the next few hours, so it was for the best that we went in the morning. It was just going to get colder. When we got to the gate of the cemetery, Bella began to walk ahead of me. I kept up easily, my hand on her back. Not looking up as she marched forward, she knew exactly where she was going. I saw his headstone from several yards away. It was already covered with flowers. She put the autumn-themed carnations in the center of his grave and took a shuddering breath. Bella slowly turned to look back at me. “Is it okay if I have a few minutes?” “Of course, darling. I'll walk around a little,” I answered before I kissed her temple lightly. “Let me know if you need anything.” I wandered to the other side of the cemetery to give her the space she needed. She was sitting on the bench in front of his site. I could tell that she was already starting to cry again. Bella had pulled one of the tissues that I purchased from her pocket and was swiping roughly at her eyes and nose. Then I spotted a tiny elderly woman in a big fur coat moving up behind her. The lady came to stand a couple of feet behind my emotional girlfriend. She turned and buried her face into her big jacket. Aiden’s Mother, I realized quickly. She was visibly trying to comfort Bella. I couldn’t imagine her pain on these days either. He was her son. Clearly, the man was loved when he was alive. His mother forced her to look up into her face from the bench. They were obviously talking, but I couldn’t hear the words because it was so far away. She touched her hand to Bella’s chest before my girl shook her head. She looked so young and sad. Almost broken. All of a sudden, the biggest snowflakes that I had ever seen began to fall in huge white clumps. All I could hear was the sound of the precipitation, thick in the sky. It was almost gentle and peaceful, if not a bit creepy. I continued to watch them carefully, feeling very protective of Bella in a way that I couldn’t understand. I knew the woman wouldn’t hurt her, I just didn’t want her to be more upset than she already was. After a moment, Bella finally looked up at me and our locked eyes. She smiled just a little. They were both staring at me. “Come here, young man!” The lady bellowed at me loudly in a thick New York accent. My girlfriend was clearly not expecting it because her hand flew to her eyes in embarrassment. I walked back to them in a hurry. They were speaking to each other in whispers as I approached. “Mrs. Esther Zucker, this is Edward Cullen,” she gave my introduction when I got close enough. “Hello, Edward. I'm Aiden's mother,” she said excitedly, offering me a dainty hand. Wrapping my fingers around hers, I shook back with a small nervous smile. “Hello, Mrs. Zucker. It's nice to meet you. Bella has said very kind things about you.” “He's foreign! Are you British?” Her eyes got wider like she was impressed somehow with where I was born. Bella sort of giggled under her breath, looking away. “I'm from Australia. My dad is Scottish, and my mum is English, though, so I do have a funny accent,” I explained. Then the older woman leaned in and asked, “are you Jewish?” Bella bit deeply into her lip, trying to hold in her laughter as her cheeks turned red. I had never been asked before. “Um... No, ma'am,” I finally replied, unsure what else to say. I was kind of stunned. She leaned her head from side to side before nodding. “No? That's okay. Neither is she. We'll take you anyway.” Mrs. Zucker put her arm around mine before offering her hand to my girlfriend. “We'll get you two some lunch.” “We've not even had breakfast yet,” I admitted. She looked utterly scandalized. “What? No, that's not acceptable. We can fix that, though. Come on. You two are coming to the house right now.” Bella and I realized at the same time that there was someone standing a couple of yards behind us. It was a rather skinny butch looking woman with short hair, thick black eyeglasses, and a heavy black woolen coat. Rushing to the girl, my girl hugged her tightly. “Hey! What are you doing back there?” “I offered to drive Aunt Esther. How are you doing? You look so good!” The woman responded with a smile. She flushed, unable to take the compliment. “I look terrible, but I'm actually doing really well. I love your coat. Edward, this is Ash. Aiden's cousin. They were really close,” she stated as she turned back to look at me. “He was my best friend,” Ash weakly added. “We lived on the same street growing up. He'd love this weather,” she told me as she offered me her gloved hand. I shook it and gave her a smile. “He'd love it inside.” His mother complained loudly. “Shall we?” I'm taking a break for the holidays. The next episode, Thirty-three, Inlaws, will post on December 4th, 2019! See y'all then! 😊🍗🥧🤤💛 Episode Thirty-one: MouthWarning: this episode contains graphic sexual descriptions. Reader discretion is advised. Intended for a mature audience only. (18+)Silently, I watched from Bella’s comfortable couch as she gathered her things to take with her to the hotel. She fluttered around the room, practically dancing. She was clearly happy. Very much so. It was almost overwhelming to consider that maybe she cared for me as much as I did for her, even though I didn’t think it was at all possible. Despite the frigid temperatures, I took off my gloves to nervous play with my fingers. When she was done, she came to stand in front of me. “Do you want to do anything tonight? I imagine you're tired.” I wanted to feel her close to me again, it was too easy not to pull her down so that she was sitting on my lap. So I did. “I am,” I said as her arms went around my neck, and she leaned in to kiss me with a big smile. “I think I'd like to go to the hotel, make love to you, and then go to sleep. Would that be okay?” “You mean you don't want to have sex right now in this icebox?” She teased seductively, her hand sliding under my coat over my sweater. “I'm not sure it's humanly possible for me to maintain an erection in this temperature. We're buying you a new heater tomorrow,” I earnestly replied, making her giggle. “How do you stand it?” “I'm used to it, and I don't pay for the heating. I was going to replace it before you came, though. It was on the list.” I was going to be damned if I was going to allow my girlfriend to live like this for even another second. But that was a problem that could wait until another day. I was planning on keeping her very warm in our bed back at our cozy suite. “I am so very cold right now,” I jokingly continued, even though I was sincere. Then her icy little hands slid under my shirt. “I can warm you up.” My balls seriously thought about going back into my body again while my erection awakened at the same fucking time. I hissed in surprise, making her cackle evilly as her teeth latched onto my earlobe. “Fuck, my body is confused,” I sort of whimpered, but she didn’t stop moving her hands up or her pressing her lips down to my neck. Slowly, both began to warm until I was on fire. My fingers moved up the back of her many shirts. “Damn, I want you.” When she pulled back, Bella looked at me with fluttering eyelashes. Her pouty lips were parted, glistening with her kisses. “Would you like to know what the first part of your birthday present is?” “Yes, please.” I instantly answered, needing to have my mouth on her again. “I've learned my lesson on that. I absolutely do want gifts.” I kissed her shoulder. She pulled back so that I was looking into her mismatched eyes. “I started birth control pills right after I came home.” Her words sort of floated in the air for a long minute. She had started the pill. I flushed at all the possibilities. “Oh. Okay. Oh. Oh… So, we... can… You won't get- If we...” I stuttered stupidly. Bella sort of bit her lip for a minute as she tilted her head just a little, her eyes drawing me in. Lightly, one of her tiny fingers moved over my chin. “Do you want to cum in me tonight?” Holy shit. Yes, please. “Fuck yes,” I answered before pulling her to me for a deep kiss. Laying her back as she giggled, I hovered over her so that I could lavish attention onto her throat. We made out there for at least an hour, grinding against each other and kissing like teenagers. I couldn’t pull away from her, barely moving enough to remove our shirts and jackets. Her legs wrapped around me, holding me in place. I had found the butterfly tattoo on her chest, beautifully healed. Kissing all around it, I began to suckle a spot right above it. She moaned loudly, holding me to it with her fingers in my hair. “Oh, Edward…” She sighed my name just before the front door opened with a heavy metal thump. The cat meowed at Alice. I sat up in surprise like I had been caught by a parent and not her roommate just coming home. Bella got up the couch, her hips swaying to the door where she leaned her head out entirely with a giant smile. There was no embarrassment, only happiness, in her features. “Hi!” She beamed. Then there was a quiet whispering conversation between them. I just barely saw Alice’s hand as it crept in and then jabbed at Bella’s breast. “Honk,” her friend said very quietly. I swallowed my childish snort. Then Bella’s hand went forward, and apparently, her poke was harder because Alice slapped her away before snapping. “Hey! At least buy me dinner first. I bought your lunch today.” My girlfriend turned dramatically away from her and slammed the folding doors right in her face. Then she began to talk back sassily as she got dressed. “I make your dinner all the time. It's about time you start putting out.” “If it makes you feel better, you can grab my boobs again later. It's the most action I've gotten in ages,” Alice shouted loudly. Bella looked unimpressed. “Eh, maybe later. I've already got better plans. There is frozen pasta in there if you want it later. Lasagna still and those ravioli you like. And only eat the cookie dough I put to the side for you, please,” she continued on normally. I wasn’t sure what was funnier, that my girl set the dough aside for her to eat in the first place or that they clearly had to have this conversation before. “Fine. There go my plans for the evening.” “You'd die if you tried,” she laughed. I picked up her bags for the hotel. Finally, she got to her coat. “It would be worth it.” “Please don't complete suicide by cookie dough, you monster. Your mama would never forgive me.” She paused for just a moment. “Alright. Text me if you need anything,” Bella said very sarcastically before they hugged each other like they wouldn’t see each other for a month. Just before we left, she turned to call out, “wash some dishes, please.” Alice sighed and pouted. “I don't want to.” Bella sighed in return. She was trying so hard not to roll her eyes. “Please. I have to cook all day on Wednesday. Do them tomorrow.” “Fine. As long as I don't have to do them right now,” she brushed her off. I could tell right away that she was going to wait until the last second. On the way to the hotel, I quietly texted a request for champagne to be waiting for us. I wanted everything to be perfect. “Oh!” She sort of gasped in surprise when she stepped into the room. Her hand went to her heart. I smiled in delight. Bella turned to gaze at me. “Would it be terrible if I took pictures?” “Not at all,” I replied, taking her camera bag off of my shoulder and handing it to her. She took it, pecking a quick kiss to my mouth before she went to the table to take it out. Carefully, I put her backpack on one of the tables’ chairs. I watched as she moved around the room, her camera going a million miles an hour. She wanted to remember every detail of this night. It made butterflies dance in my stomach, the joy overwhelming. Then she rushed up to me, pressing another kiss to my lips. “I want to take pictures of you on the balcony.” It was crazy fucking cold as soon as I opened the door, the wind whipping at my face and scarf. But it was beautiful. The skyline was filled with lights and neon colors. I could see why she would love to live here. Leaning over the edge a little, I peered down at the buildings below us. I glanced back at Bella, getting ready to pose for her. “Is this good?” She was already busily taking photos, which I should have expected, but I wasn’t prepared. The way she was looking at me made me warm again. “Yes, but I might be biased. Now come back inside before you freeze,” she answered before holding her hand out to me. After rushing in, she put down her camera so that she could take my face into her hands. They were so soft and felt amazing. “I can't tell you how happy it makes me that you're here. It feels so surreal. I feel like I dreamed you up. You're too wonderful,” she whispered, gazing up at me. I should have followed her, my mind shouted at me. This was right. This is where I wanted to be. In her arms. Always. She was my forever. “Do you know how hard it was not to follow you onto that plane? It was the hardest thing I've ever done, and I hated every day I wasn't with you. I was just gutted without you, love. You make absolutely every day better,” I admitted too honestly. We kissed and kissed as we slowly shed our clothes. When she was down to only one shirt, I knelt down to take off her boots and then her tight denim. When I stood up, I slid my hands up her legs to her waist so that I could pick her up and place her on the table just behind us. My hand greedily explored her legs, feeling her smooth skin. She yanked off my shirts, throwing them to the side. Bella pulled back, her eyes getting wider as she seriously looked me over. Her hand slowly reached forward and lightly brushed her fingertips over my stomach. She bit her bottom lip. “Fuck, some of these are new.” For some reason, I was embarrassed. “I have been working out like a madman. I've never been so sore in my life. So, don't get used to it,” I mumbled, not expecting her reaction. Nodding, she touched my abs again. Her tongue flicked over her bottom lip for a moment. “Sure, understandable. But I want you to know that I am going to be needing some pictures of my own. Because, damn.” “What are you trying to do to my ego?” I blurted out. Innocently, she peered up at me for just a second. “Nothing. It's just that... You have the V now, though. The sexy V. The hey look down here, there is something great arrow.” She began to undo the button of my jeans. We had been kissing for hours, and my cock was aching against my underwear. Her little finger skimmed just under the band. “Oh, is it great?” I said, my voice cracking. I cleared my throat roughly in embarrassment. She barely noticed as she unzipped my trousers. “Well, I think it's pretty amazing.” She took me in her hand, gripping me pleasantly tight. “You're certainly the biggest man I've ever been with. In every way. Height, personality...” I quickly took off my jeans and underwear for her, and she took me back into her hand with a confident smile. Then, Bella began to massage me. My eyes slid closed, a soft gasp falling from my lips. “I- uh... wow… You're the best lover I've ever had,” I declared as she began to kiss my chest. “I can't... can't stop thinking about you like this. Everything you do is so good. The- The way you touch me makes me- uh…” “Have you been touching yourself like this while thinking about me?” She inquired sexily, fucking with me cheerfully. “Yes.” She continued to jerk me off as she looked me in the eyes. “You know that I have.” How could I not? Sometimes a couple of times a day. “Tell me what you like to think about,” she commanded firmly. It actually made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. “I think about tasting you and fucking you with my fingers. It’s my favorite,” I confessed as my cheeks heated, my eyes sliding shut as she continued to gently rub me at the perfect tempo. “Do you like how I taste?” When I opened my eyes, she smoothed her fingers between her legs. I could actually see how wet her panties were. “Yes, I- uh...” Then her hand sped up just a little, her fingers tightening. It was so good, almost too much. I had to balance myself with the table. Tasting her, I drew her into a kiss. We made out for a long minute, playing with herself and me at the same time. When I had to pull back for air, she brought her wet fingers up to my mouth. She tasted as good as I remembered. It wasn’t enough. I shoved my hand between her legs, wanting to feel her myself. “When I play with myself, I think about the way your fingers feel inside of me. And how good you are with your mouth.” She bit my shoulder after a long lick. “How good your tongue feels against my clit.” Damn. She was so confident, and I was babbling. “I've been thinking about.... how- That I... -I want you to-to... sit on my face and... and- Fuck,” I tried to say assertively, but it didn’t come out that way at all. “You make it so hard to think.” “Do you want me to cum all over your face?” She asked in a delicious little purr as her eyes gazed up at me. “Yes,” I growled. She hopped down from the round table while her hand still stroked me. Just once, her warm little tongue brushed against my head. Then she walked to the bed without looking back, her fingers around my cock. She pretty much directed me to sit with it. Her bra fell to the floor as I kissed her breasts, her panties next. Everything about her was perfect. Bella shoved me back onto the bed, her mouth focusing on my hips, stomach, and thighs. Her hard nipples kept brushing against my skin, my erection right between her breasts. If she wasn’t careful, she was very quickly going to make my cum all over her neck. But that’s not what I wanted. I pulled her up for a swift and fiery kiss before helping her find the right position hovering over me. Her taste was so good, I loved it. It turned me on more, and I literally wanted it all over my face. I had been dreaming about it, during the day and at night. When she tried to play with me, I grabbed both of her arms to stop her. I would lose it at the slightest touch, and I wanted to focus on her instead. Her first orgasm was surprisingly quick, making more of her flavor gather at her lips. I needed all of it, holding her still with my hands around her wrists while I worked her with my mouth. The sounds that she was making were outrageously sexy. She moaned and whimpered, my name falling from her lips over and over again, louder and louder each time she came. When Bella finally fell forward, it gave me better access, so I decided to use my fingers. “Oh! Oh, god! Eddie! Edward, oh, god. Yes, yes, yes, yes,” she chanted against my stomach, her warm breath spreading over me deliciously. Her body was vibrating, squeezing my fingers tightly. “Fuck, Edward!” When my cock couldn’t take anymore, I switched out positions so that I was on top of her with her arms pinned above her head. Bella was sweaty and beautiful, her face blotchy red and flushed from all the pleasure that I was giving her. She looked up at me with such wanting. I couldn’t wait any longer, so I pushed inside of her for the first time without a condom. I had actually never had sex without one before. Even with Vicky. She didn’t like birth control pills, so we always used them. I didn’t mind, and I would never ask her to do something that she was uncomfortable with. To prepare, I had brought a shitload of protection and lube in my suitcase. I never expected that she would want me to, especially so soon. Her arms quickly pulled away from my grip, finding their way to my hair. Bella lifted a foot off the bed, her head falling back with her mouth opened wide as I rocked against her quickly. The sensation of her orgasm was so intense, it was hard to hold back. My hand went to her back to support her, the angle working well for both of us. “Fuck, it feels good,” I groaned against her collarbone as another one overtook her. “Cum in me. Please. Edward, please...” She whimpered, her legs tightening around my waist. I tried to resist her commands. I really did. Biting into her shoulder, I finished loudly. Afterward, I was so sensitive that I had to pull out of her immediately. Laying my head on her stomach, I tried to catch my breath and calm my dizzy head. “Did you miss me?” Bella teased with a happy little giggle. Kissing her stomach, I chuckled to myself. “Obviously, I didn't get my point across with last performance. Shall we take that from the top?” I inquired joyfully, happy to do that all over again if she was willing and ready. Bella could sit on my face all damn day if she wanted. I began to kiss down her stomach, but she closed her legs and kind of rolled them to the side. “Nooo... Too much,” she humorously moaned, making me laugh. I came to lay beside her with my head on the pillows. She rolled into me, smiling. “Oh, hi there. There you are.” “Hi,” I answered back, stroking her jaw gently. I could see a million emotions sort of swirl in her eyes as they took in every single detail of my face. “I can't believe you exist,” she breathed after a moment. “Of course, I exist. I was made just for you,” I let her know. Her bottom lip was trembling just a bit. Tracing the bridge of her nose, I let it graze her luscious mouth. I wanted to kiss her again. “Is that so?” She asked disbelievingly. If she only knew… “Yup. I didn't know it until the ides of October, though. It was quite a shock, but I was delighted to find out,” I let my mouth run away from me. Bella actually laughed, looking away from me then back. “You are such a try-hard. We met the fourteenth.” “Exactly.” She pursed her lips, narrowing her eyes. “It took you a day? ‘Ides’ would be the fifteenth.” “Oh… actually, I knew before I opened the front door that you owned me completely,” I answered. She shook her head as she rolled her pretty eyes at me. “You are so full of it, Eddie.” I brought my hand up, stopping her. I wasn’t going to admit my love, but I was going to do the closest thing to it. “Cross my heart. The first moment I saw you out the window, I knew all I ever wanted to be in this life was completely yours. I wasn't looking for you, so it was a surprise. But I'm terrible at these sorts of things. So, it's probably a good thing you came to me. I'm too daft to find you on my own otherwise. You had to be practically gift-wrapped for me.” Her expression became heavy again, though she was trying to fight it. “You act as if it was fate.” “Do you know how many interviews I turn down weekly now? Photoshoots? How many times I turned yours down in particular? Three times. They had been begging me for months. I only agreed because I got to look at the photographers, and you were the only one I liked. And only because I found your stuff online when I was researching everyone on the list. Because I’m picky as fuck. And they tried to talk me out of you. You were the only reason I agreed, Bella. I told them if you didn't do it, then I wouldn't do it at all. Honestly, I was just going to tell them to forget it. Zafrina pushed me. I knew nothing about you besides your pictures from your online gallery. None of which are of you, by the way. So, I had no idea what I was really in for.” Bella had fucked my filter loose, and I was just going to word vomit all over her. She didn’t seem to mind, though. “So, you're saying you unsuccessfully stalked me before,” she joked lightly. “No,” I chuckled again, shaking my head. “Just your gallery. You don't have any photos of yourself on your business stuff, and I didn't do that much research because gender didn't matter to me. I didn't see any ‘about’ page. You should change that. People have questions about you.” There were so many about her in the comments section of every single video she was in. She was overwhelmingly popular, too. They loved her wit and charming accent. She was sweet-natured and fun to watch. “Maybe,” she replied in embarrassment as she played with my hair to avoid my eyes. I swallowed and sighed. “We live on different oceans, doing very different things in very different lives. Everything had to be right to bring you to my door. If it's not fate, I'm not going to waste the gift I've been given. I don't know if I've done anything to deserve you, but I'm going to do everything in my power to be the kind of man you want in your life.” Her eyes got wide, her lips parting as she took in a quick breath. Bella quickly ducked her head against me. I tightened my arms around her, holding close. We laid there in silence for a long time before she pulled back to look into my eyes. “I don’t know why you would want to be in my life, but I am so happy that you do,” she concluded as her thumb smoothed over my cheek, pulling me into a soft, sweet kiss.  Episode Thirty: Sharp TongueThen they got down to business. I realized that this was real work. I was blown away by my girlfriend, who was just doing her job, like a boss, while holding the sleeping baby and eating at the same time. The only thing that really slowed her down was the fact that she needed help with cutting her meat. I had never seen ‘career’ Bella before, and I liked her a lot. She agreed to help lead trips in the summer and fall, one to Ireland, not too far from my Grandparents, and to Disneyland, which wasn’t far from me. I wondered if she did that on purpose. Once the work for the day was done, I had so many things that I wanted to ask. Alice was excited to tell me whatever I wanted to know. I sat pressed against my girlfriend as she held the infant and fed him. He was a pretty little thing with lots of hair. I almost wanted to ask to hold him too, but big men requesting to hold babies are usually considered creepy. Especially if you don’t know them. So, I instead played with his little fist as he ate. It wrapped tightly around my pointer finger. I wanted to figure out the best way to give money to the non-profit so that it did the most good. This was something that Bella cared about, and I wanted to show her that I wanted to help too. I had already decided to make Culture for All my charity of the month for December. It was probably the first time that I had done anything charity related to impress a woman, and I couldn’t bring myself to feel guilty about it. There were worse reasons to donate to a good cause. And then Alice turned her attention to my girlfriend after answering a question that I had about their classes and camps that they did. They were discussing doing a children’s cooking camp when the UK trip came up again. “I wish I could come with you to Ireland. I could go see my grandparents,” I started wistfully as I pulled a curl away from Bella’s temple and behind her ear so that it wouldn’t go into her eyes while she was holding the baby. She looked so good with him. “You could meet them in person.” “Well, you are more than qualified to volunteer,” her best friend said to me cheerfully. “All you have to do is fill out some paperwork and get endorsed by a qualified person-” Then Alice pointed a little finger at Bella. “Yeah, of course,” she replied as she brought the newborn up to her shoulder. It was apparent by the way she handled him that she was very experienced with babies, her time in the church daycare paying off. The boy looked up at me with a wobbly head as she patted his back firmly. He had a little milk around his mouth, so I carefully wiped it away. He smiled at me for a second, and I couldn’t help but return it. “And there you go. If you're really interested, I can put you on the list as one of the helpers. Bells can show you the website online to fill it out,” Alice helpfully answered as she smiled at me. “That's it?” I questioned in surprise. The infant belched after a good pat, looking instantly relieved as he relaxed against her shoulder. Bella’s hair fell around him like a curtain. There were just a few of us left of the group, and now it felt more like a lunch with friends. I was enjoying it. “This is an abled adults trip. Meaning it’s adults who have issues that make it harder to travel, but they’re still able to care for themselves. We're basically sheepdog trying to herd them and keep them from breaking things,” my girlfriend giggled. “Mainly themselves. You don't need any special training for that. You're just a helper.” “Would we get time to see them? My grandparents?” “They could come to anything we did. Museums. Gardens or whatever. And we can stay on our own dime after the trip is over. We just don't get our flights back paid for,” she clarified next. She wasn’t against this idea. It gave me so much hope to think that maybe the following year, the woman that I love could meet some of the people that I cared about most. “Sven and I are going to go to Saint Petersburg after the trip we're doing together,” Kebi stated, eating her dessert and waving her fork around a little as she spoke. “Sven, her husband, is Russian, and he is actually paler than you somehow,” Alice teased. I think she already liked me and I had to admit, I adored her as well. Kebi shook her head, then sighed. “He's so white. We went to Trinidad for my mother's birthday, and I think he got paler, somehow. He went to the beach for three days, and it just bleached him. My children are going to look like Casper the ghost.” I had to press my lips together to keep from laughing loudly. She reached over and took the baby from Bella, who frowned slightly. His mother was fully asleep, leaning against Alice. She sort of giggled. “You'll have one dark kid like you and one light one, and they'll have the weirdest Jamaican Russian accent from New York, and I cannot wait. And I'll be their cool aunt.” “Who gives them weed when they're sixteen,” Bella muttered under her breath. Her friend was not embarrassed at all. “I am the cool aunt.” “It won't be cool by the time they're old enough. It'll be legal everywhere, and it'll be stuffier than wine because all the old people smoke it for medicine. I use it for my insomnia, and I honestly thought my first time would be a lot cooler when I was in school. But I was extremely uncool as a teen, so nothing has changed,” I blurted out, warm from my wine. Bella actually scoffed at me, glancing in my direction. “Oh, please. You're the coolest person in this room. You have literally millions of fans who scream your name. I’ve seen them. I’ve heard them. They love you because of how cool you are. False modesty is a filthy habit.” It shouldn’t have been a turn-on for her to call me out on my bullshit, but her playful eyes and lips that were curved into a smirk was too much. I wanted her. “Be careful not to cut those pretty lips with that sharp tongue of yours,” I quipped back as I squeezed her leg under the table to show that I was teasing. She melted against me, her nose skimming over my cheek lightly before she pressed a kiss to it. Her smile was so warm and inviting. God, I was so in love with her. It made me think about the ring again. “You like it,” she flirted. My girl wasn’t wrong. “Maybe a little.” “Maybe a lot,” Alice smirked, giving us a funny look over her glass. “So, are you going back to the apartment after this? I have to go back to the office. Fucking paperwork.” Ah, what a mature way of letting us know that she wasn’t going to be home so that we could fuck if we wanted to. Yeah, I did like Alice. “I don't know. We haven't talked about it. Eddie has a hotel room, so at the very least, I'll have to get some clothes if I stay with him,” she answered, glancing back at me. Yes, please stay with me. I brought her hand up in mine. “We can do whatever you please. I'm just happy to be here. I know you have things you have to do,” I informed her, trying to be a gentleman as I kissed her hand before pressing it to my face so that I could feel the softness there. Her fingers cupped my skin. “It doesn’t matter where I sleep, though,” she told me with a smile. “I want to stay with you if that’s okay.” “Of course.” Her smile grew. “Okay. I hate to do this, but how do I wake Nicole?” Alice questioned. “Gently and not like an asshole,” Kebi joked, rocking back and forth in her seat with the baby. “So, I just don’t move then?” She inquired sarcastically. Bella snorted as she stood and walked to the other side of the table. She leaned over, gently rubbing the mother’s shoulder before kissing her temple. “Thanks for letting me play with your baby. He’s super cute. You better get him back before Kebi leaves with him,” she whispered. Nicole sat up quickly. “She can take him.” She rubbed a drowsy hand over her face. “She’ll bring him back. I’m so sleepy.” “Oh, okay!” Their friend thundered, standing up with the bundle of joy. “Let me know when you need me to start watching him!” Bella exclaimed, waving her hand. “Please, no babies at the apartment,” Alice mumbled to herself as she stood from her chair and stretched her arms over her head. “Patty is enough.” We walked out together. Bella made sure that Nicole and her newborn were in the back of a cab and on their way home before we caught our own. The sun was setting, and the streets were glowing a luminous amber. I watched Bella’s face in the changing light. It was so serious. “There is something we need to talk about. I wasn't going to bring it up, but since you're here, it kind of changes things,” she finally began. “I hope it wasn't a bad thing that I came.” I thought about what Jasper had said. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to just pop up. She was quick to bring her hand up, though, shaking her head. “No. It's great. I just... I haven't wanted to talk about it or think about it. But tomorrow is Aiden's birthday. I wasn't going to bring it up at all, but I go to the cemetery, and I usually spend the day with his family.” She seemed so small and nervous to tell me. I wish she had before. My birthday was so close to his as well. I wondered if that upset her in any way. “Oh… I'm sorry. It must be hard on those special days.” She looked away as she flushed in embarrassment. “I haven't called his mom yet. I've been feeling guilty.” “We can go to the cemetery tomorrow. Or you can go alone if you need to. I would understand either way,” I let her know. I would do whatever she needed. She smiled at me slowly, sadly. “I would like it if you came. If you're not uncomfortable with that.” “Of course I'll come.” I tugged her to me so that I could hold her to my chest, and she pressed herself against me. “Would you like to see his family as well?” She didn’t look at me. “I think I might just call this year. I don't know,” she sighed. “I should, but I don't know if it would make it harder for them. Or for me. They're great, it's just... so much. They're always...” she trailed off, flustered. “We can do whatever you need to do,” I assured her quietly, refusing to let go. “Is it going to be hard for you?” The question surprised me. I sat back a little so that I could see her face. Why was she worried about me? “How so?” Her lip quivered before she shook her head. “I love Aiden. I still love him. I will love him until the day I die. That won't ever change. No matter what I feel for you now or in the future.” “I would never ask you to deny that either. It was very unfair what happened to you. Look into my eyes. Trust me. You're not going to scare me off.” I knew what I was getting into before we started dating. I wasn’t frightened of her past. It made her into the beautiful woman that I was holding. She shook her head, clearly upset. “That's not fair to you.” “How?” I questioned as I lifted her eyes to look into mine. Then I realized that she was worried that her sadness would make me envious of him in some way. No, I wasn’t. I had her now. That’s what mattered. “No. Just... no. Don't even think about that. I'm not going to be jealous of someone who loved you so well.” “I'm going to cry in front of you tomorrow. Like, actually cry. Not overly emotional in Target crying. It's not going to be pretty. Or nice. Or sexy. Or quick.” “We'll stop to get tissues. And chocolate. And wine. And whatever else you may want or need,” I replied. “I took tomorrow off because I've been a mess in the past. I don't feel as emotional as I have been, but...” She kept shaking her head. Bella looked so embarrassed and ashamed, and I couldn’t understand why. “I have survivor's guilt. I've always struggled with it. With my mom, then my grandmother, some. I recognize it, and I understand why I feel it, but it doesn't change the fact that it's there in the background. It's one of those fun things about PTSD. You... this... right now helps, though. You're what I need. You’re what I want, Edward,” she said in a rush, looking up at me with such fear. I brought my hands to her face so that I could pull her lips to mine. Her kiss was needy, her fingers clutching at the lapel of my wool peacoat. “Whatever you need tomorrow,” I whispered into her hair. “I will do my best to give it to you.” As soon as we walked into Bella’s apartment, the cat began to meow very loudly from the top of her high tower, not far from the front door. Bella reached to pet her, but Patty rolled onto her stomach so that she couldn’t. My girlfriend smirked as she forcefully gave the kitty the bird. I chuckled, scratching her belly. She obviously liked it because she began to purr. “You slut,” she insulted the cat. “She's so fat and fluffy,” I mumbled as my fingers danced over her tummy until her tail curled around it. So I played with that instead. “That's because Alice feeds her chubby ass waffles. She begs worse than a dog.” Patty noticed the door opening, so she jumped down to follow for more pettings. “No. You don't get to go into my room. Go to your mama’s.” Bella waved her hand in front of the open door. I went inside, and she closed it swiftly. The kitty shoved her paws under the door right away in protest. It rattled violently in place as she locked it. Her room was big, probably the size of my master bedroom. There was a large comfortable looking leather sofa on one wall, and on the other, there was a small white daybed. Everything was perfectly neat, and it smelled like coffee, vanilla, and coconuts. Just like her. I breathed it in deeply. I walked to her window so that I could see the view that she loved so much. As soon as I saw the Empire State building, I smiled to myself. Bella’s arms wrapped around me from behind as she pushed her face into my shoulder. As she held me, I realized that she missed me just as much as I had her. Coming early wasn’t a mistake, but maybe the best thing that I could have done. I needed to be here for her. I felt so overwhelmed as I turned to look at her. I didn’t know what to say, so I blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “I like your room.” “Thank you. It's not as impressive as, say, a five-bedroom three-bathroom McMansion with a pool and a waterfall in Burbank. But I like it,” she teased dryly. She was playing with me. “You want different things from a home in New York,” I joked in return. “The real estate market is very different. But I'd trade my pool for that view. And to be closer to you.”  Episode Twenty-nine: UniqueIt was well after sunrise by the time I checked into my very expensive suite in the middle of Manhattan. I arranged it to be filled with flowers, wanting to make an impression on Bella. It was just after ten, and I knew that she was probably at her practice still. So, I decided to get her a little gift from the store across the street from the hotel. It was an antique jewelry store, the whole place stuffed from floor to ceiling with cases and cases stocked with dazzling pieces. “Hello, hello,” an older man called to me from behind one counter. He dusted his hands off after putting his bagel down, taking a quick sip of his coffee. “How may I help you, young man?” “I’m looking to get a gift for someone.” “Oh,” he drew out, nodding his head. “A female someone?” I glanced up at him for a moment. “Um… Yes,” I nodded my head, looking at my overwhelming choices. “Wife, girlfriend, mother, or sister?” He asked next. “Girlfriend,” I replied, stopping at the earrings. I knew that she liked pretty colored stones. Bella had left a pair of purple ones in the bathroom. “So, a girlfriend but not looking for a ring?” He waved his hand at the case beside me. I kind of chuckled. “Eh, though I may be ready for that, she’s not. But it’s only been a month.” “When you know, you know,” he remarked, but then he nodded. “But maybe something else then. Are her ears pierced?” “Yes. She’s got three in each ear.” “Well, you should get her three pairs then!” He joked. “So, what kind of girl is she? Is she a classic, or maybe a more modern woman? What’s her style?” I didn’t even have to think about it for a second. A smile came to my lips. “Unique. She’s an extraordinary woman. And modern.” “Oh, unique! Let’s see what I have for that.” He looked around for a moment before pulling out a pair of large square cut lime green stones. “These are a carat each. They’re peridot. They’re a unique gem because they only come in one color, unlike say diamonds or emeralds, which can come in a variety of shades.” I didn’t realize emeralds were any other color but green. Biting my lip, I looked over the earrings that he handed me. They were very pretty and were not unlike the ones she had left behind, simply bigger and probably much more expensive. “You know what? Yeah, I like them.” I nodded my head swiftly, smiling at him. “I’ll take them.” “Perfect! Let me ring you up!” He said excitedly, happy to make a sale so quickly. As he went to register, I began to look at the next case. It was the one with all the engagement rings. Most of them were quite similar, boring even. None of them said Bella to me when I tried to imagine putting them on her finger. I walked past it to the next one. These were more fashionable and colorful. Some were very obviously antiques. Then one made me stop. The inside was a perfect round diamond, at least two carats, maybe bigger. Wrapped around the edges were dark green emeralds, the border perfectly smooth and rounded as well. The setting was raised and twisted in leafy vines, the band a silver color. The man came back with my bag and credit card, smiling to himself as he saw me looking at the ring. He brought it out without having to be asked. “This is a very unique piece. It’s four carats in total, the diamond is two and a half, and the rest are the emeralds. It’s from the Edwardian period.” I sort of chuckled to myself. He gave me a curious look, and I shook my head. “My name is Edward. When I imagine myself proposing, I just can’t with one of those,” I admitted as I pointed my hand to the case beside us. “Now, something like this… Well, I can see this on her hand.” “Well, you said you were ready!” He encouraged, trying to make another sale. “It’s always good to be prepared.” “I think that if I proposed now, she would run for the hills,” I quipped, but it was probably true. “She would probably think that I’m nuts since I haven’t even told her that I love her yet. She’s not ready. But it’s nice to dream.” Since I had Bella’s address, I decided to head towards her place. I would wait all day if I needed to, just to see her. In the back seat of the car, I was practically jumping in place. When I got out in front of her building, I smiled when I recognized some of it from Bella’s pictures. She had so many from around her home. She was very proud of where she lived. Leaning against the solid brick wall, I took a deep breath and brought out my phone. My hand was actually shaking a little, but that might have been because it was incredibly fucking cold. So cold, in fact, my testicles were starting to painfully crawl into my body. It only rang a couple of times. “You're up early,” my girl started rather cheerfully as a way of greeting. I could hear her moving around in the background. “Not too early.” “You must have slept well,” she replied sweetly. Alice’s cat meowed. She was at home. I fist-pumped in excitement silently. It was working out perfectly. I kept my voice even. “I did indeed. So, what are you up to?” “I'm going to go to a lunch meeting for CFA in a bit.” “Oh, can I come?” I hopefully asked. Bella softly giggled. “Sure. They'd love to meet you. But you better hurry, I'm walking out the door right now. We're having Brazilian.” “That sounds great. I'm starving. Wait for me. I'll be there in a second,” I joked as I went to stand behind the front entryway. “Alright, I'll wait for you by the front door. I've got to order a car anyway. It's too cold to wait for the subway. Fucking climate change,” she mumbled under her breath. “Here, let me call you back in a second, so I can do that.” “Okay.” Now, I assumed that she would walk right outside to wait for her car, and I could surprise her then. But Bella was smart and waited inside. I could just make her out as she walked into the lobby, standing to one side of the door by a window on the opposite side of me. She couldn’t see me. Then I saw her bring her phone up to look at it and go to the door. She took a step onto the stoop, pausing to look out onto the street for her car. Bella looked stunning, even in her heavy coat. “You are right. It is too cold.” Turning, her eyes got wider with shock before she shrieked loudly. Then my girlfriend threw herself at me from the steps, wrapping both her arms and legs around me in the process. Quickly, I coiled my arms around her in support, her lips going to mine right away. “Hey, you called for an Uber?” A man in a newer car called to us, interrupting the moment. “I’m George.” Slowly, Bella slid down to her feet, her eyes looking up at me in almost wonder. I realized that she hadn’t heard him. She was too focused on me. “Yes, we are,” I replied with a smile. I ushered us to the back door to open it for her, my hand on Bella’s back. She got in, sliding in so that I could get in beside her. “You said the twenty-first!” She finally spoke again, the shock wearing off. She wasn’t unhappy, though. “I did. But... one of my meetings for Tuesday got canceled last night, so I decided to flake on what I needed to do today. It wasn't that important. That meeting was, but they rescheduled for next month. So, I decided to take a flight out last night last minute,” I explained to her quickly. “What time did you fly?” “Around ten last night. I got here around seven this morning. I went ahead and checked into my hotel, so I could get cleaned up. I didn't want to ambush you that early,” I chuckled. I felt literally giddy. “I wasn't at home anyway. I was probably already in Brooklyn. It's already been a long day for both of us. Longer for you. Oh, my God, I can't believe you're here,” she said she took both of my hands into hers and smiled. The look of wonder was still on her face, just for me. Then I realized something. “Oh, wait.” I took the box from my pocket and presented it to her. “I brought you a gift.” “Now, you really didn't need to do that.” Bella bit her lip and slowly took it from me. Then she opened it, her mouth opening up just a bit in surprise. She didn’t say anything, and it made me anxious, so I began to babble. “I'm told these are peridots and that they are an interesting gem because they only come in one color. Did you know there were green sapphires and diamonds?” I had googled it on the ride to Bella’s place from the jeweler. She nodded her head. “Sapphires and diamonds come in a bunch of colors. When I was a kid, we went digging for diamonds in Arkansas. They find brown diamonds there a lot,” she explained as she put in her new earrings right away. “I love them. Thank you.” “You're welcome. You can dig for diamonds?” I blurted out. “Yup, and it's fun because you play in the mud, then you can go to the water park afterward. They till up the soil every once in a while, and someone finds a karat or two. It's just a big mud field around the Ozarks,” she informed me, her words starting to jumble together because of her excitement. I couldn’t help but smile. “Really? That does sound like fun,” I replied as I brought her knuckles up to my mouth to lightly kiss. “You look so beautiful. I'm so happy. Is it really okay if I come along, though? I understand if not.” Her smile was huge. “Um, yes! Absolutely. There will probably be another spouse or two there. Probably a kid, too. You just have to buy your own dinner.” “Hm, I think I can handle that,” I returned. She thought of me as her spouse. I was her partner. It made my heart thump hard in my chest. As we walked into the restaurant, Bella held my arm with her whole body pressed against mine. There were a few people already there at the big table. One of them was a woman only a couple of inches taller than Bella with very long black hair and perfect brown skin. Her teeth were extra shiny white as she smiled, contrasting brightly against her dark lipstick. She was holding a very tiny pale white baby. “Hi!” Bella greeted excitedly. “Nicole, he’s beautiful!” She said to the woman who was sitting across the table. There were deep purple circles under her eyes, and she had her chin in her palm. “Thank you,” she murmured tiredly, smiling. “Who are you?” The woman with the baby asked bluntly in a thick Jamaican accent, looking me over. “Kebi Petrov, Eddie Cullen.” She waved between us. “And That’s Nicole.” The tired woman curled her fingers at me. “Oh, you’re her new man. We’ve been watching all of your videos for weeks at the office,” she stated with a laugh. “Instead of working?” Bella snorted as she sat down. She was very close to me, leaning into my side but facing her friends so that she could talk to them. “I can multitask,” she teased. My girlfriend leaned over to gaze at the baby and sort of sighed, a look of longing on her face. “He’s so perfect.” “I want to keep him,” her friend replied. “I think that Nicole might mind that,” she countered with a little smile. The woman holding the baby shrugged. “I’ll just kidnap him,” Kebi insisted very seriously. Bella rolled her eyes, then shook her head. “Okay. Who’s going to keep him while you’re working?” “I’ll hire a nanny,” she answered quickly. “Psh, when you could just let me watch him?” She responded, rubbing a finger over the baby’s stomach. “Oh, that’s probably cheaper,” the woman agreed with a smirk. “Bella!” Someone shouted from behind. There were a lot of greetings after that point. Everyone spoke warmly to my girl, hugging her as they laughed and smiled with her. Then they began to throw a million questions my way. I wasn’t nervous before, but they were making me that way. The excitement of the day had given me a confidence boost. I realized that I needed my mask and swiftly slipped it on so that I could answer anything that they wanted to know. Everything from how old I was, to my family, to my acting career. Everything was inquired about. Bella didn’t really seem to notice them, though. She was focused on playing with the baby while leaning back in my arms. “I know. Sorry, sorry, I'm late. I know. I'm... me. I don't have an excuse,” a woman with wildly curly black hair started as she hurried to the table. “Don't say you're sorry. Say, thank you for your patience,” Kebi insisted, patting the child’s back while gently bounced. My girlfriend sort of smirked as she rolled her eyes. “We lost all patience years ago.” “I know that's right,” she snorted back, fist-bumping her for the mild burn. Clearly, Alice was unamused, making a little face. “Some of us aren't anal assholes who have to be thirty minutes early to- Hey... You're new. I know you,” she said in surprise as she pointed at my face. I stood up from my chair so that I could properly greet her. She was Bella’s best friend, and I wanted to make a good impression on her. She had beautiful, very shiny, curly black hair that just went past her jaw. “Your hair is so lovely!” “Oh, thank you!” She giggled, blushing a little as she looked up at me. “A couple of my sisters have black hair right now. They get theirs from a bottle, though. Of course, they’re still lovely,” I rambled nervously with a small laugh as I sat back down. It was one of those places where the meat came to the table, but there was a big salad bar where you had to make your own plate. Everyone at the table was eager to get their food, except for Bella and Kebi. “I'll hold the baby while you go get your food,” my girl charmingly began in a sugary voice, holding her hands out a little. “No, I don't mind. You can go.” She pursed her lips and then narrowed her eyes, the sugariness going away as she bluntly stated, “I'll give him back.” Kebi made her own face. “No, you won't.” “I will. He'll start crying at some point,” she joked. They stared at each other for a long time before the woman gave in and handed her the baby. My girlfriend smiled in triumph, bringing him to her body to cuddle. “I want him back,” she pointed at Bella before standing up to get food. I knew the look on her face as she peered down at him. Every one of my sisters had it at one point. Usually, while holding one of my sweet, brand-new nieces. It was so adorable, her expression full of gentleness. Suddenly, I wanted that baby to be ours. I thought back to the ring at the jewelry shop earlier. But if it was too soon to tell her that I loved her, it was way too early to even think about bringing up the idea of babies. I pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek. “I'll go get us something to share.” She grinned, her forehead pressing against mine. “Thank you.”  Episode Twenty-eight: ImpromptuI crashed so hard the Saturday after my fight training wrapped up. My brain was half-melted, my stomach wrecked, my muscles aching, and my knees probably aged ten years from all the drops that I had to do. It was well past three in the afternoon when I woke up the first time. I had a couple of messages waiting for me. One was from my sisters with my nieces, all waving hello and blowing me kisses in a video. I loved it. The next was a picture from Jasper, his hair wet from surfing. I could see the beach and the waves behind him. It said, “wish you were here, darling.” Smirking to myself, I replied, “me too.” The last was a message from Tyler. “Hey, boss! Long-time, no see! We’re having an impromptu get together tonight. Figured you might need some home-cooked food and company. Let me know if you’re interested.” I only had to think about it for a moment. “Yeah, I’d love to. Should I bring anything?” “Nah, just yourself. It’s going to be around seven at my place.” “See you then.” I considered getting up and doing things, but I was too exhausted to even think. I set my alarm on my phone and just went back to sleep. When I woke up again, It was dark outside. I looked at my phone, and it was just past six in the evening. I cursed loudly, looking at the alarm that I thought I had set. It was for the AM and not the PM. It was an hour after I wanted to get up. “Fuck!” I complained. I hated being late. Quickly, I threw myself in the shower before getting dressed. I wanted to at least pick up some beer for the get-together. The nearest store had a good bakery as well, so I picked up a case and two different desserts. One was vegan for Lauren, and the other was regular chocolate for the rest of us. As I was standing in line, I realized that I hadn’t spoken to Bella yet. She had sent me a message late in the afternoon saying that she had missed talking to me. It made my heart swell with happiness. She couldn’t know how much I missed her. “I am counting down the seconds until I can see you again.” “I want to hear your voice,” she answered just as I was climbing into the car. I dialed her number so that I could talk to her on the drive there. “Hi,” she spoke in a sexy little breath, her southern accent evident even in the short word. “Hello, gorgeous.” “So, how many seconds?” Bella puckishly asked, a little giggle in her soft voice. I hummed for a moment. “I'm not sure, I'd have to look on my phone. It's on a countdown clock. I got an app,” I replied honestly. I looked at it way too often, especially as time marched closer. “I half expected you to spit out a random number.” “You really think I'm joking? I assure you I’m not. So, what have you been up to today, my love?” I wanted to know everything that I missed. She hummed for a minute before answering. “Gym. Practice. Shopping on Fifth Avenue. Had lunch in Times Square. Watched a tourist get in a fight with a person in a Hello Kitty costume. You know, your average day in New York. Oh, I got your birthday gift. It was a productive day, at least.” “Hello Kitty? Really?” I laughed at the very image of it. I didn’t doubt that it was the truth. New York seemed to be a strange place. “I don't want to know. Anyway, you don't have to get me anything. You're my present.” Bella actually scoffed. “Oh, okay. Well, I'll just return this big bag of Victoria's Secret sitting beside me. Such a shame.” I was such a dumbass. I walked right into that. “Let's not be too hasty now. I'm talking out of my ass. Give me presents!” She laughed very lightly. “Oh, no. Too late.” My girl was having fun screwing with me. She was a little wicked. I nodded to myself at a stoplight, looking up towards the sky. “No. Okay. It's fine. You look best in nothing at all, so that's fine,” I repeated the word with a pout. “Are you sure about that?” I could hear the challenge in her voluptuous voice. “I've got something that might make you question that. I was going to take pictures for you while wearing it, but I guess I won't now. Since, you know, no presents.” “Damn, you are so mean.” “Aw, am I?” I wanted those photos so fucking badly. My cock twitched in agreement. “I should not get hard at the mere suggestion of dirty pictures of you. Not even that dirty. Just modeling underwear,” I half complained to myself and my growing erection that was practically laughing at me. She hummed again. The sound was drawn out and flirtatious. “I've got to give you something fun to think about when I'm not there.” Bella was so smooth and in control, and I felt like a babbling twat. “Oh, you've given me plenty to think about. You know what frustrates me the most? You're too cool for that. I don't think I could get the same reaction out of you. I'm a horny idiot, and you're just... unmoved.” “Please,” she actually laughed. “I literally jumped you because I couldn't take it anymore. Or have you forgotten that already?” Oh, she had, hadn’t she? I smiled slightly to myself. “I might need some reminding. Perhaps jump me again next time you see me, yeah?” “I mean... obviously, I was planning on doing that already in my Victoria not-at-all Secrets, but you said no presents,” she spoke in the driest, funniest voice. I liked our playfulness. “Give. ME. Some fucking gifts, woman,” I reiterated jokingly as if I was angry, hissing the words through my teeth. Bella giggled sweetly. “Ask nicely.” I wanted to ask nicely, alright, but I pulled up to Tyler’s house. There were several cars already there, but I was only like five minutes late somehow. “Dammit. I want to be the pervert that I am and give you the proper begging you deserve, but I have to leave my car in a second and go in public. So, I'm going to say pretty please very quickly. Yes, I will beg. I know you were joking about pictures, but I will get on my knees. On my knees, Isabella. Just to see you in whatever you have in that damn pink bag,” I concluded as smoothly as I could manage despite wanting to whine like a child. “Okay. If you beg extra hard on your knees, I might let you take the pictures,” she answered seductively. “Extra, extra hard.” Now I was extra, extra hard. “Okay. Fuck. Dammit. That... Please. Yes. My darling,” I whimpered pathetically. Another one of Tyler’s friends pulled in beside me and was fetching things from the boot of their car. I realized that it was Andy, his brother. “I have to go. I'm going to Tyler's for dinner.” “Tell him and Lauren hello for me. And Seth, whenever you see him next,” Bella replied quietly, I could feel her sorrow, and it matched my own. I ached for her. “I will. I'll talk to you tomorrow, darling,” I swore. I would probably talk to her again that night if it wasn’t too late when I was done with dinner. Though, I didn’t want her to stay up for me. I knew that she had practice in the morning. “Have fun.” “I will,” I answered, biting my lip. “Goodnight, love.” “Goodnight.” I sighed as I leaned my head back against the seat. My phone buzzed, and it was another picture of Jasper. Smiling to myself, I decided to talk to him later as I got out of the car. Just as I was pulling the dessert from the backseat, my mobile began to ring. I was from a number that I didn’t know. “Hello?” “Hello, my name is Amber, and I’m calling on behalf of Mr. Howard at the Disney offices,” the young woman started at the end of the line. “I’m trying to reach Mr. Cullen.” “Oh, yes! How may I help you?” “Mr. Howard won’t be able to attend your meeting this week. He would like to reschedule it for next month. He apologizes for the inconvenience, a personal family emergency has come up.” My mind instantly began to whirl with possibilities. That meeting was something that I couldn’t skip out on. Otherwise, I would have come to New York the night before, right after training finished. I had some shooting planned for the next couple of days, but it was nothing that I couldn’t put off to another day. There was a possibility that I could be in New York by the following evening. “Not a problem at all!” I indicated far too excitedly. “That- that works out, actually. I can leave a bit earlier and do some traveling that I had planned. I can fly out sooner.” “Fantastic. I’ll talk to your manager to arrange a better time. I tried to contact her first, but it went straight to voicemail. Mr. Howard said that it was important and wanted me to get a hold of you as soon as possible. Will you need to rearrange your use of the personal jets?” I paused, confused by her words. “Excuse me?” “Disney’s has airplanes for their top creators to use. It’s part of your contract. You said that you were traveling. Will you need help rearranging your travel plans?” “Oh… I didn’t know that you could do that.” I was stunned. For a moment, I tried to remember that lovely little detail, but I couldn’t. “And how could I arrange that?” “I can do that for you, sir. If you like. I do it for Mr. Howard all the time. Hopefully, this will make up for any trouble canceling might have caused,” she responded pleasantly. “Hh-how fast could you arrange that?” I asked in a very high-pitched excited stutter. I cleared my throat. “I’d like to be able to leave as soon as possible.” There was only a brief pause. “I’d have to make some calls. Can I call you back at this number?” Amber helpfully inquired. “Sure!” I beamed. “Yeah. That’s- yeah! Thanks!” I could barely speak. “Oh, you’re welcome! I’ll call you back.” When she hung up. I was a little too shocked to move for a second, a smile growing on my face. When I finally got to the front door, Tyler and Andy were waiting for me. They were looking at me curiously. “So, hey!” I grinned widely. I gave Andy the beer and Tyler the desserts. “How would you like to have a few extra days off for Thanksgiving?” “I’m always for less work. What’s up?” He pondered as he looked at the two cakes. “Disney canceled on me.” I followed him inside, practically dancing in place. “And apparently they have a jet that I can use. Mr. Howard’s secretary is going to arrange something for me. She’s going to call me back with details. Lauren!” I barked way too cheerfully as I came into the kitchen. “Eddie! You’re in a good mood!” She replied as she hugged me. She was a little thing like Bella and had to bend her head back to look at me as she patted my stomach gently. I nodded. “Yes, ma’am. I am. I’m giving your old man a few extra days off and blowing this Popsicle stand early.” Gently, I squeezed her shoulder. “I brought you a vegan coconut cake thing that looks pretty alright.” “Thank you!” She patted my stomach again before going back to the stove. “So, when are you leaving?” “I-” My phone began to ring again. It was the same number as before. I quickly brought it to my ear. “Hello?” “Hi, Mr. Cullen! It’s Amber again. I wanted to let you know that the soonest possible time is ten tonight. Is that okay?” “Are you fucking serious!?” I shouted too loudly. I turned away from the crowd in the kitchen, which was all quietly staring at me. “Yeah! Um, wow! Yes! That’s perfect. Ten is great.” “Oh, good. The hanger is at LAX. I will text you your gate directions and flight information. Is that alright? Would you like me to email it to you as well?” “Yes, both would be perfect.” I was virtually vibrating. “Thank you so much for your help, Amber.” “You’re very welcome, sir. Enjoy your trip, and have a Happy Thanksgiving!” “To you as well!” I insisted before I hung up. Then I looked between Tyler and Lauren. “I am so sorry, but I’ve got to bounce early. Um, please enjoy the beer and desserts. Everything smells delicious, I’m sorry that I’m missing it.” “Oh, shut up and go see Bella,” Lauren laughed before she came over and gave me a little kiss on the cheek after jouncing up on her toes. “You are so cute right now! Have fun! Have a good birthday and a happy holiday.” “Thank you so much. You too!” “Hey! Wait! We’ve got a birthday gift for you,” Tyler exclaimed before I could leave, running off to his bedroom real quick. “You can take it with you.” He brought me a small bag. I peeked inside and laughed at what I saw. It was a whole host of cannabis oil pens. They were all different strains. There were probably ten of them. “Dude! Wow! It’s so many.” “Your joints haven’t been doing it for you lately, so I thought that maybe you could step it a bit. It might help you sleep if anything else. It’s a variety, so you can see what you like best.” “That’s,” I chuckled, “so thoughtful. Thanks. This is great. I’ll take it with me. I haven’t tried anything like these yet.” My friend threw his hand up as if to warn me. “Go slow,” he advised. “Right,” I nodded, heading for the door. “So, I’ll see you in December. Wait, shit… Can you cancel the shoots for me?” He nodded, giving me a thumbs up. “I got it. I’ll call Seth too and let him know. He’s at his parent’s tonight.” “Great! Thanks! Okay… Um, Have a nice vacation!” I called as I hurried to my car. Tyler was smirking as he waved to me. Lauren was standing behind him in the doorway, smiling. “You too, boss!” I drove like a madman back to my house. Thankfully, I already had my bags packed because I was an anxious asshole who over-planned everything. I threw them into the foyer to wait for my Uber. My phone dinged with the details not long after. She also sent me the information for when I wanted to set up to use the planes again. In less than two hours, I was heading towards the airport. There was a finely dressed host waiting for me, almost looking bored. I was literally giddy. “Mr. Cullen, we’ll take your bags. Your jet is just this way if you will follow me,” he explained as we stood in front of the large hanger. The door was already open with a couple of personal planes, buffed to a shine, just waiting to be used. We were in the air precisely at ten and heading towards New York City. When we were an hour into the flight, I called Jasper. “Hello, lovey!” I exclaimed like a fool. It was too loud, too bright. “Oh, what stupid thing are you about to do?” He jokingly asked. My best friend knew me too well. “So, guess where I am?” He scoffed at how I answered him. I could almost see him shaking his head as he smirked to himself. “Not a fucking clue, darling. Want to give me a hint?” “I’m around thirty thousand feet in the air right now,” I began before taking a sip of fine bourbon that was brought to me in a crystal glass with perfectly clear ice cubes by one of the very young and pretty flight attendants. “Are you seriously flying to New York?” “Yup! My schedule opened up, and I was able to leave earlier. The best part, though, I am on one of Disney’s personal jets, flying for free, because I am one of their top creators.” I buffed my nails on my jacket like an idiot. No one was even there to see me. I was literally showing off for myself. “I’m going to surprise Bella.” There was a slight pause. “Are you sure that’s a good idea, Tony?” “Uh, flying first class on Mickey? Yeah,” I snorted. “No, idiot. Surprising Bella. Doesn’t she have a lot going on?” “I-” I stopped and realized that I hadn’t once thought if it was going to be a good idea just to show up early. It didn’t matter how much I got to see Bella, though. I just wanted to be in the same state as her again. And I knew without a doubt that she missed me as well. I thought about what my therapist said. She was a spontaneous person. Perhaps she would like a surprise? “Yeah. It is. It’s only a couple of days early. I just… I need to see her again. I need to kiss her. I think- I think she’s going to be happy about this.” “Yeah, I think that you’re right. Why wouldn’t she be?” He stated encouragingly. “That’s exciting, though! I’m surprised that you could do it that quickly.” “Me too,” I agreed with a laugh. “I had all my shit packed and ready to go. It was too big of a chance to pass up. Especially for free. It just fell into my lap.” I took a long sip of my drink, enjoying the tingling burn down the back of my throat. “Yeah, that is too good. I don’t blame you. So, you’re going to have your first proper American Thanksgiving with your American girl in the Big Apple. It sounds like a thrilling way to celebrate being a quarter of a century old.” “It sounds… Perfect. Just perfect. Everything is going to be perfect,” I repeated it like a prayer. I finished my bourbon quickly, raising my glass to show that I wanted another to the waiting attendant. She took it with a smile. “Thanks,” I mumbled when she handed it back to me. “It will be. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you nervous like that. I shouldn’t have said anything,” he apologized quickly then sighed. “Damn, sometimes I don’t think.” “No! No, you’re fine. Don’t worry, darling,” I answered lightly. “I should have thought of that, to be honest. You’re more considerate than I am. But I don’t think that I would have done anything any differently.” “No, probably not,” he chuckled. “She’ll be overjoyed to see you, Tony. I know that I would be. Alright, I need to go. I’ve got a date tonight.” “Oh, nice! Anyone that I know?” “Nah, it’s just going to be a shag anyway.” I clicked my tongue. “Oh, don’t judge me! Some of us aren’t gift-wrapped women and have them shipped to our front door!” I laughed. “I’m not judging you. I’m worried about you. I just want you to be happy.” “I am,” he assured me. That was a lie, and we both knew it. I leaned my head back, closing my eyes. I wanted to call him out on it, but it wasn’t the right time for it. “I’ll talk to you later. Let me know how it goes.” “Yeah. Of course. I’ll send you a million pics and videos probably.” “Good. I look forward to it. Kiss your girl hello for me. Bye, darling,” he said quickly before hanging up on me. I looked at the blank screen. It was just before midnight, and the flight would be another four hours, at least. Downing the next glass, I passed it to the waiting girl. “I’d like to get some sleep.” “There is a bed in the back. Or you can recline your seat, and we can dim the lights,” she answered. “Uh, I’ll go lay down in the bedroom,” I decided slowly. The surrealism of the situation was starting to hit me. It was not something that I would have imagined myself doing a year before. In a bed that was nicer than my own, I laid on top of the covers with my shoes kicked off. Somehow, even though I slept most of the day, I fell asleep within minutes.  Episode Twenty-seven: ClayI was always a person who suffered from bouts of depression and melancholy. After I had broken up with Vicky, I was an angry, sullen mess for two weeks. My last week in Sydney and my first week in Los Angeles to be exact, but I quickly found that I was much happier without her. I felt stupid for wasting my energy on being emotional over her when she moved on with someone else before the end of those two weeks was even up. But I had never experienced this sort of hollowness before. I was there, but only a shell of myself. There was no sleep for me, and I either wanted to eat everything or nothing at all. Not that I tasted anything that I shoveled into my mouth. If I wasn’t filming, recording, or editing, I was working out. Hours and hours at a time wasted in my gym on my treadmill or lifting weights in an effort to turn off my mind. All I wanted to do was sleep. All I did was make myself ache. And what little slumber that I got was filled with vivid dreams of Bella. Or Jasper. Some were sexual, most were not. I dreamed about them together again twice more, though. I was always watching them from some corner, her in my clothes. And then she would moan my name. The name that she had never called me before. “Hello Edward,” my therapist, Clay, said with a slight smile as I came into his office a week after she left. I was only coming once a month because I was so busy, but also because I didn’t really enjoy the process. Even though I knew that I needed it. “How are you doing today?” “Um,” I began with an awkward, sad laugh. “Kind of shite, actually.” “Oh, no! What’s going on?” He asked curiously, pointing to his couch. I sat across from him, kind of lounging in the corner. I anxiously looked at my hands, rubbing my thumb across my fingers as I considered how to talk about it. “So, uh… I had this photographer that was supposed to follow me around and stay at my place,” I began. “I remember that gave you quite a bit of anxiety. Did it go badly?” He questioned, obviously reading something from his notes. “No,” I laughed again before licking my dry bottom lip. “No. It… It went- Perfect. Absolutely perfectly. Um, as it turns out, though… this photographer is the love of my life, and she lives in New York City.” “Ah,” he remarked, opening his mouth and nodding his head as he took in what I said. It was a dramatic leap, I had to admit, from how I was feeling about it last time that I spoke to him. “Does she not return your feelings?” “Actually, we’re dating now. Though, I don’t know if hers are as strong as mine. But I realize that I am kind of an intense person.” He wrote something on his tablet before looking up at me with a face that I couldn’t read. “It’s okay to feel things strongly, but it’s also good that you’re aware of them. So, what’s the problem?” “She had to go back home, of course, and I now miss her like crazy. I literally fell instantly in love with her, and I’m not that kind of person, you know? I’m not spontaneous. Nothing is instant for me. I have to plan everything, and it takes me a long time to warm up to anyone.” “Well, it’s understandable to miss someone you love. So, tell me about her,” he encouraged warmly. “What’s her name?” “Actually, it’s just the most perfect name for her. Bella. Isabella,” I drew out with a fake Italian accent. “She is so beautiful, and she cooks awesome Italian food,” I laughed as I thought about it, smiling to myself. “Is she Italian?” I shrugged. “She has no idea what she is. She’s from Texas originally. Charming accent. Here,” I pulled out my phone so that I could show him a picture of her. I actually showed him a couple of them. A normal one from one of the shoots, a picture of us from Halloween, then finally the one I had for her contact picture. She was in my arms on the couch, gold lipstick absolutely smeared everywhere about our faces. I was kissing her temple, my eyes closed as she slid her fingers just behind my ear. Her cheeks were rounded with her cherub smile, her eyes big and bright so that you could see that they were differently colored. “She is adorable, and you look very happy with her,” he commented. I nodded, smiling to myself again as I considered my emotions and how I felt with her. “I am. Happier than I’ve ever been, actually. That’s why I feel like shit now. This girl… She’s literally perfect for me. It’s like I found this missing piece that I didn’t know that I had lost. She’s everything that I need. Bella is relaxed, easy-going, cheerful, strong-willed, brave, and so damn smart and funny. She’s even great in my videos!” “You filmed a YouTube video with her?” He blurted out in surprise. We talked about my fear when it came to trying to find new people for my channel. It was different from the other stuff. This was personal. This was my daily real life. My fun and joy. I just worked so well with my friend group in Sydney. I didn’t know how to open myself up like that again. It took years to build up those relationships. “Yeah, the second day that she was here. I filmed loads with her, too. I’ve been editing them since she’s left, and I’ve almost finished,” I concluded in a bit of a pout. I had already started putting mashups of Bella from the videos that I liked but couldn’t go into the final product together. Usually of her making me laugh, or the other way around. Also, there were a few jokes of hers that I had to cut that were fucking hilarious. My favorite super-cut was of her being sarcastic and mean. It included her telling me that I was a fancy bitch at the tattoo shop, calling me a lying liar who lies, her letting me know that my man card was in her purse, and finally advising Tyler to shut up like a Looney Tune character. “So, does she like being in them as well?” “Yeah, she really seems to. She’s great at it. Actually, she’s better than great. It’s like she was made to do it. She’s really talented in her own right, too. Bella is a photographer and a musician. I keep thinking of all these fun things that she could do for the channel if she was just here and wanted to, too. And we keep coming up with all these brilliant ideas together. She spits them out so fast that it’s hard to keep up sometimes. You should see how many pages of notes I have on it,” I babbled, and he let me, though that was why I paid him. “She’s my muse, and I want her back now,” I whined like a child. He smirked a little, tilting his head to the side as he considered his next question. “So, being in a relationship hasn’t hurt your creativity or productivity any as you feared it might.” “No,” I replied quietly. One of the things that I had complained about with Victoria was how she could kill any spark with a single sour word. I was afraid that would happen in any relationship that I formed. They would insult my fun, and I would hate myself for it, even if they were the actual problem. “The opposite, in fact. I suppose that’s just further proof of how unhealthy that relationship was. Everything is so different with Bella.” “How so?” “She’s generous with her time and her energy. Her patience. She helped her friend start a non-profit organization that helps bring culture to groups of people in New York who may have trouble otherwise. Disadvantaged youth, disabled adults. Vicky was so selfish and self-centered. Bella talks to people like she’s giving you all of her attention and gives you compassionate and intelligent answers. She’s gentle and soft. Vicky was so fucking spoiled. Bella’s so grateful for everything. She had a really fucking rough life, though. It- It hurts me how much she’s gone through.” Clay tapped his stylus pen on his tablet so that it made a slight clicking noise. “What has she gone through, if you can tell me, and how does it hurt you?” “Well… It hurts because I can see how she’s suffered, and I can’t take that pain away from her. She’s an orphan. Her mother died of a drug overdose with her in the vehicle! It put her in a coma for a week, the car crash that it caused. Her grandmother raised her until she dropped dead when she was fifteen. She told me that they made lunch together after church one Sunday afternoon, her grandma said that she was going to lay down and take a nap. Died in her sleep of a heart attack. No other family in the world. She doesn’t know who her father is. Then she was assaulted when she was seventeen, dragged off behind a dumpster and forced to defend herself with a knife, almost raped. Then her husband just dies, too. Young. He was only forty. He was older than her by bit over a decade, I believe, but still too young.” “And how old is she?” “She’s just turned thirty-three. Her husband died close to four years ago,” I over-explained as I scratched my jaw. He nodded again. “I see. She’s a little older than you.” I smiled a little. “Mm, just a bit. I don’t mind it. She doesn’t look or act like it.” “Like what? She doesn’t act or look like what?” “Oh, like, I don’t know. A judgy ass middle-aged ‘let me speak to your manager’ type, you know? She’s a real free spirit.” I shrugged a little and smirked. “She’s so much like my best mate, actually. I’m still dreaming about him, by the way. I keep dreaming about them together now. Sexually,” I murmured the last word. Clay nodded briefly in understanding. “Well, that doesn’t really surprise me. Your friend is such an important part of your life. Sex in dreams is often an indication of becoming closer with someone. Or your desire to be closer,” he typed something out as he spoke, then glanced back at me expectantly. “So, I want my best friend and my new girlfriend to be close?” I sort of asked it like a question. I nodded my head. “Yeah, that makes sense, actually. I keep thinking about how I just need the two of them here, and everything would be perfect. I think that if I had them here, I could keep up with the channel in a way that I like and still do my acting without losing my mind. I feel dirty when I have them, though.” He kind of chuckled. “We can’t control our dreams, Edward.” “Oh, I know.” I shrugged again. “I just wish that it was something else that they were doing together vigorously. Like… surfing. Dancing. Fucking bowling… anything else.” “Is there a reason that sex makes you so uncomfortable?” Just thinking about it made me blush a little. “Uh, well, sex was a no-go topic in my household growing up. My mother did not tolerate it at all. She said it was undignified, and if I had questions, that’s what a teacher or doctor was for, not parents. Which, in her case, I totally agree. I’d rather talk to my local serial killer about my sex life than my mother,” I stated, thinking back to the gory research that I was doing when I had the chance. It was interesting and terrible all at the same time. “My mother and father showed zero affection to one another growing up. My eldest sister says that they weren’t always like that, so I don’t know what changed. Bella’s very openly affectionate, and she allows me to be as well. Vicky didn’t.” “Showing affection is very important in a healthy relationship.” “I agree wholeheartedly. I can’t imagine not wanting to be that way with her constantly,” I admitted to him. “Even thirty or forty years in the future. I can’t conceive of a day when I’m not going to want to hold her hand and kiss her. Cuddle her close to me while we sleep. Fuck, I’m such a dramatic bitch,” I used Jasper’s term for it. It was too accurate. He put his hand up to stop me. “No, Edward. That is a very normal and healthy thing to feel, and Bella is fortunate to have someone that is excited about those things.” “Every time we talk, I keep wanting to shout that I love her. It’s too soon. We’ve only been together for a few weeks, and I think that she’s more delicate and timid than she lets on. I feel like I’m just bursting with it. I’m thinking about doing it when I see her again.” “When will that be?” I bit my lip for a moment. “Later this month. I’m going on a vacation to New York for my birthday.” “How long will you be together then?” He typed some more. I looked up at him worriedly. “Just a month. Is that too soon?” “I think that’s a very individualized answer. I would have to know Bella to give you one. Do you think that it’s too soon?” “It might be. I should probably wait to see how the trip goes before I vomit my feelings all over her. God, I already know that I’m going to blurt it out stupidly while all I want to do is plan and make it perfect for her. Everything about her life has been so unromantic. It would be nice to give her some little moments that maybe we can tell our grandkids about.” “Those moments aren’t usually planned,” Clay replied, writing something down and glancing back at me with a little smile. “You said that she was spontaneous. Perhaps she would prefer it if you blurted it out?” He questioned me curiously. “Maybe,” I smiled, knowing that she would surprise me no matter how I did it. “So, why don’t you tell me what else you have going on right now?” Taking a deep breath, I thought about my life. “Oh, I’m starting my training for a movie next week. I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I was kind of worried because I’ve never done anything like it before, but now I’m nervous because I’m not sleeping more than usual.” “Have you considered talking to your GP about sleep aids? Is the cannabis not helping?” “Oh, it helps. I’ll get to sleep. I just won’t stay asleep for very long. No. I don’t want to try sleeping pills yet. I don’t like how those make me feel. And I do weird shit sometimes, and I’m alone now. I don’t want to drown. Or walk into the street. Fall off a cliff,” I finished dramatically, making him chuckle. “Honestly, when my girlfriend was here, it was the best sleep that I’ve probably gotten in years. She said it was because of all our fucking.” He laughed loudly at my unexpected words. “She might not be wrong. Sex is actually great for that. So, let’s go back and talk about your anxiety over your training…” We spent the next thirty minutes talking about my work worries. It was usually how we spent the sessions. By the time I left his office, I felt exhausted. I stopped for a junk food dinner before going home to edit until dawn. The Sunday morning before the training for the movie began, I drank two doses of NyQuil Severe liquid. Then I darkened the room with blackout curtains, turned the air conditioner down to sixty, put on two fans, laid under a very expensive weighted blanket that was specially made for my giant self with classical music playing on my phone despite my earplugs and an eye mask. It still took at least two hours to fall asleep. When I did, I slept until Monday morning. I quickly learned that there was nothing to be anxious about the fight training. I had more than enough athletic ability to do whatever they wanted for the scenes. The training itself was actually fun, but it was arduous. I was working out two hours a day, at least, on top of my twelve hours of instruction. We had minimal time with the stunt choreographer, so we had to cram as much in there as possible. He liked me, and we worked well together. Every night, I crawled into bed, sore and dead tired. But before I went to sleep, Bella and I texted or spoke. It was the very best part of any day. She indulged my every message with a relatively quick answer, often sending her own at times when she knew that I was busy just so that I would have something waiting for me. She would send me her thoughts, pictures, funny memes, or songs that she liked at the moment. I especially loved her varied taste in music and started making a playlist of just the ones that she suggested. When she realized how much I enjoyed it, she didn’t hold back with our communication, and it was making me feel better. By the end of that week, I was finally feeling like a real human again. I was still sad, and I missed her, but I was getting better at controlling it. That and being rested helped a lot as well. Even though I wasn’t there, I tried to spoil my sweet girlfriend. She spoke of her love of one the local diner’s breakfast food and having it delivered. It was the crack of dawn, and I was in the back of the car being driven to training when I had a thought. “Hey Alice, this is Eddie. I would like to have some breakfast delivered for Bella, and you, of course, and I was hoping that you’d be able to help me out,” I texted her best friend over Facebook messenger. I didn’t have her real phone number yet. “Sure :D,” she answered right away. “How can I be of assistance?” “Bella was talking about these strawberry Nutella waffles that she really likes?” “Gotcha! Would you like me to set up the order so that you can just pay for it? I know what you’re talking about. I’ll order what she likes,” she typed very quickly. I smiled at her helpful best friend. I already liked her. “That would be perfect.” Less than a minute later, a link popped up to a food delivery website. It had two breakfast meals ordered, one strawberry Nutella waffle with whipped cream. Extra of everything with it on the side, country ham, a bowl of fruit, and some chocolate milk. And then a triple chocolate crepe, bacon, a large fruit smoothie, and a large iced coffee. Alice was going to take advantage of my offer, and I couldn’t blame her. It was still less than twenty-five dollars with the tip and everything, though. I was surprised that it was so cheap. Bella sent me pictures of them eating their massive spread on Alice’s bed in their sleep clothes. They were both were animal themed footie pajamas. It gave me so much joy. Patty, the cat, was begging for waffles in the background. It was just after nine when I was finally able to call her. It was the second to last day of training, and I was so ready for it to be over with. “Hey there, handsome,” her voice purred warmly over the receiver. “Hi,” I breathed out. Talking to her like this made me feel like a teenager again. I enjoyed the calls, wanting to learn everything about her. Perhaps Bella was right. That we needed to have some separation from our perfect bubble to figure out our feelings. It forced me to not focus on our fantastic sex lives, at least when I was talking to her. I had learned a hundred new and fascinating things about my interesting girl. Things that endured her to me even more and made my feelings deepen. The separation only solidified my adoration. “So, I was thinking about what I’d like to teach you to cook while you’re here,” she began almost teasingly. “I want to start you off easy with some Tex-Mex since you love tacos so much.” “They won’t be as good as yours,” I complained, but I was smiling. She laughed lightly. “I’ll be there helping. They’ll be fine. And if they’re terrible, we’ll just order some pizza. Oh! You know what would be impossible, but fun? The ranking of the top five New York-style pizzas.” “That sounds fucking delicious, but I think that I’d need to research before we attempted that.” “Probably so. Just narrowing down the top ten places would be hard. God, so much pizza. We’d need a big pitcher of beer to go with it,” she continued. “Mm, what kind of beer?” I just wanted to hear her keep talking. “With pizza? I like a cold sweet lager with lots of citrus. There is a strawberry pale-ale that I really like at this bougie place in Manhattan that Demetri adores. It’s draft, and they serve it with a slice of orange. It’s really good. It’s so easy to drink.” “I like listening to you describe things so much,” I sort of smirked to myself. “What kind of pizza would you like with this strawberry ale? Make me hungry, baby. I need to eat and go to bed, but I might be too tired to bother.” She giggled at my dumbness. “What kind would I like with that? Hm. I think that I’d like one of those big proper New York pizza-rat sort of slices.” I laughed loudly and abruptly at her unexpected answer, making her giggle again in return. “Probably pepperoni.” “Mm, yum. I’m so hungry now,” I said dryly. “I know, right?” Bella teased in a silly voice. “I’ve actually been cooking a lot to prepare for Thanksgiving. I’ve been eating constantly.” We spoke for thirty minutes just about all of the food that she was planning for the big day. My girlfriend was obviously excited. Then we talked about my training. Her practice. We ended up chatting until it was near midnight my time. She was practically falling asleep on the phone but was fighting it as hard as she could. In the dream that I had about her that night, we went on a lovely picnic and ate all her delicious food before we made love under a blue sky in a white flower-filled meadow in the mountains. We laid beside each other, holding hands after as we smiled. I told her that I loved her, though I couldn’t hear myself saying the words. She replied with, “I love you too, Tony.” This episode contains all new stuff, but it goes before Episode Twenty-five of Imperfect Pictures! Episode Twenty-six: UnhappyEven if I was tired and in a piss-poor mood, I had to go filming with Seth and Tyler. They arrived at the house right on time, like always. Tyler brought me a large iced coffee with caramel and handed it to me wordlessly. “Thanks,” I smiled, taking a small sip from the straw as I went to go get my keys. I passed them to Seth. “How are you doing, boss?” He asked softly. “Mm,” I hummed in the way of an answer. “Miserable, honestly. But I guess I’ll have to get over it.” “Bella is really awesome. She’s a good kid,” Tyler stated, grinning to himself as he nodded. “I like her. So does Lauren. I think that you two are really nice together,” he said awkwardly and then smiled at me. He wasn’t great at showing his real emotions. “I can understand why you’d be sad. At least it’s so much easier than it used to be to stay in touch. When we were teenagers, we still had dial-up. And you’ve got all the money in the world to up and visit whenever you have a chance,” he rambled. “You’re right,” I smirked a little. “I'm just dramatic. You know how I am. It’ll be fine. The coffee helps. Thanks.” “I don’t know, man. Bella might be the kind of woman to be a little dramatic over,” Seth chimed in. “But just a little.” “Yeah, I think that she likes just a little drama,” Tyler smirked, obviously thinking about the baby stuff still. He shook his head a little to himself. Lauren was going to win that so fast. I wouldn’t doubt that she was knocked up by the end of next year. “It felt wrong to watch her leave yesterday,” I admitted as we walked to the car in the garage. We were doing a food video first, but my stomach was mildly upset. I had eaten so much shit the evening before. I laid out across the entire backseat, wedged in one corner. “Well, when you find the one, it’s hard-” Tyler started. “Really?” His best friend laughed, looking over at him. He made a little face that I didn’t understand. “The one? I mean, I adore Bella, but he’s not in love with her already. Right?” There was a long silence. Seth turned around to look me in the face while the car was still turned off. I raised an eyebrow at him, challenging him to ask again. But then he huffed and pulled a twenty from his wallet before handing it to Tyler. “You two are assholes! Yeah, okay. Fine. I am in love with her. Jesus. I wondered how fucking obvious I was. And stop betting on it! Or at least be sneakier about it. It’s insulting for some reason,” I snapped as I pouted with my arms over my chest. “Were you seriously betting that I was already in love with her?” “It wasn’t really a wager, in my opinion. It was a sure thing.” Tyler folded the cash and put it in his pocket. “But yeah. It’s pretty obvious.” “Really? Like that? You’re in love with her? After a couple of weeks?” “You wanted to ask her out, too. There was a good reason for that,” I sighed in reply. “It was love at first sight for me and-” I snorted. “She got to watch me looking like a tool online for literally weeks before. And she still agreed to be my girlfriend for some dumb reason. I don’t get it.” “You’re a good guy. She has a lot of excellent reasons to want to be your girlfriend,” Tyler countered, only sucking up a bit. “I’m sorry that you’re miserable right now. I’d be pretty sad without my girl, too. If you need to talk… Let me know. And don’t worry. It’s going to work out for you two, I think. She likes you too, Eddie.” “I think so, too,” I smiled a little. “I mean, I think that she’s really into me. And I hope that it’s going to work out. I want it to. I… I really do.” That night when we were eating dinner around the table, I got a text from Bella. It was really late there, past midnight, at least. I smiled when I saw it. It was a picture that she took of the moon behind the Empire State building from her apartment. The message read, “the view from my bed.” I smiled to myself. “Sending dirty pictures already?” Seth teased. I scoffed, turning a little red at his joke. “Hardly.” I showed him the photo. “From her apartment. I got the tour this morning.” “Oh, sweet…” he mumbled, looking at it. “Let’s take a picture for her.” The three of us got into the frame, very clearly eating Zankou’s chicken again. Seth sipped from his cup, and the containers were all in the frame. I decided to send her a message that she would enjoy. “We need you to tell us about murder.” “You know what I want to do? A true-crime show with her. She understands why I think that it’s interesting and doesn’t judge me for it,” Seth said, and then he smirked a little to himself before shaking his head. “You know what? I am an asshole, I’d probably already be in love with her too. The first time that she nerded out about serial killers with me, and she’s probably own me. Plus, her tits and coffee.” “You are so weird,” his friend grumbled through a bite of chicken. “I agree about the other two.” My phone buzzed again. “I bet Seth knows the story. Get some good sleep tonight.” “I think that you’re right,” I showed him the text with a chuckle. “You know, true crime is a big fucking deal right now, right?” He reminded me once again. “I know that I’m harping on it. But you should seriously look into it. And if Bella does half as well as she does at off the cuff with you… I mean, it’s something you should consider.” “Yeah, you’re right. If anything else, it’s something that she is at the very least interested in. I should learn something.” “Or not. You’re a couple. Not the same person. You don’t have to like the same things,” Tyler added quickly. He just didn’t want to do murder stuff either. “No, of course not. But Seth’s right. It is a thing. Research never hurt anyone.” I tried to sleep that night. Really, I did. I was exhausted. I smoked myself near stupid, just trying to get my mind to shut off. Bella was in bed, and I was still too sour at Jasper to talk to him again. I had been pouring out all my emotions onto him for weeks and not really giving him much back. I shouldn’t have been surprised that he was reaching his limit on my bullshit. He took it a lot more than most. I knew that sometimes, I could be too much. I hated that he felt that I bullied him, but I knew what he meant, though. Pushiness was a virtue when you were the youngest. Otherwise, you might not get the attention that you needed. It still wasn’t an excuse to be a twat. But I had yet to finish pulling my panties out, as he so kindly worded it, so I was going to give it or another day or two until I found my head. I was sure that the pictures they took of me after Bella left were shite. I already missed Jasper, though, and not being able to whine to him about missing her made it all that much worse somehow. When I laid in bed, I could do nothing but think of both of them. I shouldn’t have been surprised that I dreamed about them. Just witnessing the dream, I watched as if I was sitting somewhere in a chair across the room. I had no power in it. Jasper was lying in my bed. He was stretched out in his sleep pants, shirtless and barefoot, like I had seen him a thousand times before. His thick arms were above his head, and his face was lolled to one side, staring right through me. He was expressionless until something began to rustle at the end of the bed. He smiled slowly, looking down at the noise. Bella crawled on top of him while wearing my hoodie. She looked just as she had our last day together. They spoke to each other, not that I knew what they said. She straddled his waist, smiling as she talked to him. She was sitting up, her hands hidden in my hoodie, with the sweetest little expression on her face. Occasionally, my girlfriend would bite her lip and giggle, her hands resting on his chest while his fingers slid up her bare thighs. He was looking up at her hungrily, enjoying their closeness. He peered up at her as if he was in love with her. She was clearly enjoying his attention because she leaned down to kiss him on the lips. My hoodie came off, revealing her nude body underneath. Jasper had his hands in her hair, kissing her in return. Forcefully, he shoved her onto her back. She laughed, drawing him closer with her thick thighs around his waist. Her tiny fingers danced along his jaw and over his ear then slid down his neck. My girl’s eyes never flicked in my direction, not that I was actually there. She rolled her face to the side so that I could see her expression, though, her eyes closed in pleasure as he kissed her neck and shoulder. I had seen him make out a hundred times and walked in on him fucking dozens more, so I had a fair idea of how it would look and sound. In my dreams, he never had his stupid mustache that I hated. I could imagine his freshly shaven skin against hers, warm from the shower. The scent of his aftershave filled my nose in the dream and actually made my mouth practically water with desire. “Tony,” dream Bella moaned my name. I had never heard her say it, but I know that is how it would sound. He moved down her breasts, his plush pink lips kissing between them to her stomach. “Tony,” she whimpered again as her fingers twisted into his blond curls in that way she did when she liked what was being done to her. Her shoulders arched toward his mouth, wanting more. Then her eyes focused on me, wide and her gaze sharp. “Tony.” I shot right up in bed, sitting up surprisingly violently. My heart was pounding in my chest. Shoving both palms into my eyes, I bent my knees as I tried to catch my breath. My fingers tangled into my hair, pulling it. Looking down at the erection that stretched my sleep shorts still after a few minutes, I sighed. I had said that the idea of seeing Bella with another person would turn me on, and I was right. I hadn’t expected it to be with Jasper, though. The dream was probably hotter than it should have been for me. Especially after the one that I had about him a few days before that I kept thinking about. My skin flushed even though I was alone, embarrassed by my own thoughts. It was like watching very specialized porn almost. It wasn’t real, but I still felt guilty. Giving up, I decided to take a hot shower and just edit until I was blind. When I tried to go to sleep again, it was after the sun had come up. I attempted to rest, but my body wouldn’t relax, and I couldn’t stop thinking about Bella. Or Jasper. Or the dream. I gave in and sent one of them a text with a picture of me in the bed, looking worse for wear. I titled the picture 'sleeping is for suckers.' “You don't have to work today. Go back to bed,” Bella answered right away, making me smile. “I tried.” “Did you get any sleep?” “Only a couple of hours. I edited all last night. I'm probably just going to get up and edit all day anyway. Are you having a good day, at least?” “It's been alright. I've been describing our sex in great detail over waffles,” she replied. I actually laughed out loud. Knowing Bella, it was probably true. “lol, sounds fun. Should I be worried?” I asked in return. “She’s just disappointed I don't have pictures.” The idea of Bella being naughty in photos was… so hot. It made my erection come back angrily even though I did something about it in the shower earlier in the morning. “Next time,” I suggested with three winks. “I look forward to it,” she indicated with her own wink. “Me too,” I said out loud. Quietly, I sighed to myself. Looking down at my shorts, I mumbled, “I’d tell you to go fuck yourself, but that’s what you want.” I threw my sheets off of me with a huff and decided to go work out instead. That day, I worked until my eyes were sore and literally twitching. I ordered a pizza for dinner and ate all of it myself with a few beers. Afterward, I sat by the pool with a joint, exhausted and aching. I stared at my phone for a long minute. Finally, I gave in again. “Hello?” Jasper answered after the third or fourth ring. He sounded breathless. “Hey. Do you have a minute?” “Of course, darling. Yeah, just give me a sec,” he mumbled, moving the phone away from his face, and then I heard him hurry off to somewhere more private. I heard a door close in the background. “Okay.” “So, pick my underwear out of my vagina? Bruh, that’s a little harsh.” There was a moment of silence. “Yeah, it was. I’m sorry. I’m… just- I’m honestly jealous. I miss you so goddamn much, and she gets to spend all this time with you.” “I can-” “And I know you can. But I have a career here.” “You hate that place!” “I hate the assholes that I work with, not the job. But I have other things here. My other friends. My family-” “Your father treats you like rubbish. Your Mum has moved away. Your grandparents have passed. Fuck him. I hate how he abuses you,” I growled in annoyance, too drunk to keep it in. “You could at least get a better job at a news station here if you really want that to be your career.” “I couldn’t afford it, and I won’t take a loan, Tony.” “Okay. Well, we’ll figure something else out. No Loans. You could just stay at my place for free then until you get on your feet. I don’t have a house payment anyway. And then once you were stable, you could start paying for the utilities. You know, like before.” He laughed. “I love you. Thank you for being my friend.” “Even if I’m a bully? Yes, I know that I am. I just- I just want you to be happy too, and I know that you’re not.” “It’s not your responsibility to make me happy.” “I want to try,” I answered. “I can at least help if you let me!” Jasper sighed. “Yeah. I know. You know, we have to grow up, right? We’ve got to do some of this shit on our own. What do you suppose Bella is going to think of you begging your best friend to come live with you because you don’t want to be alone?” “She lives with her best friend actually and would one hundred percent understand,” I said with confidence. “I got to see her. The roommate. She’s cute, too. Pale and petite. She had pretty blue eyes. She reminds me of the anime girls that you used to draw with the chubby cheeks and tiny noses back in school.” “Oh, what’s her name?” “Alice. Doctor Mary Alice Brandon.” He chuckled softly. “Doing some online stalking now that you’re alone?” I laughed as well. “Yeah, but she actually told me that part.” “Your girl likes to be around smart people, it seems.”. “She’s too sharp. I think that she’d get bored,” I commented with a sigh. “She went to NYU, by the way. She has a degree in music. She plays a bunch of instruments and has a beautiful voice, too. I heard her sing on Halloween.” “You do like your artistic types,” he teased. I nodded my head, looking down at my drink. “I do. I like creative people. I’ll admit it. Everything would be so boring if there weren’t artists. I want so badly to be one of those people.” “Stop. You know that you are. So, how are you doing? Really?” Biting my lip, I leaned my head back as I considered it. “I’m not currently throwing a tantrum, but I’m not exactly happy. I miss her already. I think she does too.” “I’m sure that she does.” “It still feels like a mistake to let her leave. It feels… wrong.” My friend sighed, thinking about what he wanted to say. “Well, if it is, you two will figure out a way to fix it, I think. But it wasn’t a mistake,” he stated quietly. “Just don’t stress out so much. She seems like an easy-going person. Maybe take a cue from her.” “Probably not unwise,” I agreed as I looked up towards the Los Angeles skyline. “I am truly sorry if I have bullied you, recently or in the past. I know that I am a pushy motherfucker sometimes when it comes to things that I want. It’s just another thing that feels wrong. But we will figure it out. And I will try to be better at respecting your decisions, even if I don’t understand them or like them.” “I wonder how long I could let you go on for if I just let you talk,” he mocked with a light laugh. “A while probably,” I chuckled in return awkwardly. “I mean it, though. I am sorry.” “Apology accepted. But you’re still kind of a cunt.” “Yeah,” I laughed more genuinely. “Good. We’re on the same page then.” He scoffed at my answer. “So, I haven’t slept in days. I’m going to try and probably fail. But I’m starting to hear colors and shit, so…” “Man, suck it up and take the meds.” “And sleepwalk into the pool? Nah. It’s fine. I’ll get to sleep eventually. I’ll talk to you later. Have a good day at work, hm? Text me later. I’ll send you some shit when I wake up.” “Alright. I look forward to seeing it. Goodnight, Tony.” “Night, mate,” I sighed as I hung up. I took a picture of the moon behind the mountains from the loveseat, no clouds or stars in sight. I sent it to Bella. “Goodnight, darling.” |
