Episode Sixty-Six: Black

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Next: Episode 67

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Episode Sixty-Six: Black

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It had been two days since we had gotten back to Australia. I still felt tired. Edward was still sad, but he was fine. We talked to Jasper whenever we could. We had a group chat, and each of us had our own texts. We had yet to send any fun pictures, but no one was really in the mood. Everyone was tired.  But, it was time to get back to work.  

Seth, Tyler, and Lauren were coming over for filming, so I decided to make everyone brunch before we got started. We were finally going to film the DNA video, and I was going to learn what I was made up of. For some reason, I wasn't really in a rush. What difference did it make? Everyone else was excited, though, and I enjoyed their energy.  

Lauren was at five months along and was just showing. She loved the big breakfast spread I made for everyone. I was having fun being with them again around Edward's dining room table. I could tell he missed his LA friends too. Seth and Tyler had left before the new relationship with Jasper started. 

I wondered if they would be able to hide their feelings for each other once he moved here. I kind of doubted it. Seth and Tyler were both too smart, and they were around too much not to. That would be interesting to see them try. They caught on with us quickly.  

Once Edward was done eating, he kissed my cheek and pulled me out of my thoughts. “Alright, I’m going to finish setting up and make sure I have everything printed out that we need.”

Seth was still eating. He had a piece of sausage hanging out of his mouth. “I’m not done. This really good.”

“Take your time.” My boyfriend waved him off, getting up from the table. “We’ve got all day.” This was going to be the only video we were making that day. We kind of figured we would end up taking the rest of the time to look up our individual ancestry information. Perhaps there would be interesting material to make more videos about our research. We would plan, and maybe film, that afterward.

"Are you excited, Bella?" Lauren asked, snacking on her fourth slice of vegan bacon that I got for her. She had also eaten a massive serving of hash browns drenched in ketchup, several roasted tomatoes, a pile of grilled mushrooms, and two bowls of mixed melons.  

I shrugged a little. “It doesn’t really change anything.”

“No, but it’s cool,” Tyler said, sipping on his coffee. 

"It is," I agreed. I yawned softly, pushing my hair away from my face. It was eleven in the morning, but I was still somewhat jet lagged. I was ready for a nap. 

“Alright. I’m done,” Seth finally mumbled, pushing away from the table. “Let’s go set up the equipment,” he said to his buddy. 

I carried some of the dirty dishes into the kitchen, Lauren helping me. She kept snacking on fruit as we went. 

“Are you okay?” She asked me worriedly. 

“Oh, yeah! I’m just tired from traveling.”

“When are you heading out again?”

"I was supposed to fly home the tenth, but that's not going to happen." I smiled at her and sighed. "I'm probably going to back to New York in late April or May to go get my stuff. Me and Eddie need to figure some stuff out first though," I commented. "How are you feeling, by the way?" I didn't want to talk about me anymore.  

“Great… but I need to pee,” she said suddenly, her eyes getting wider, and then rushed off to the bathroom. I laughed a little bit to myself. 

I was almost done putting things away when Edward came back into the kitchen. He looked gray, his skin pallid and slightly moist as if he had broken out in a cold sweat. 

“What’s wrong?”  I said instantly, rushing over to him. I was just hoping he wasn’t getting sick again. 

"Um…" He trailed off, unsure of how to start. "Nothing is wrong. I just-" Edward stopped and took a deep breath. "Bella, if I say that there is something I need to tell you, but I think you would want to wait until we get through today… would you trust me?" 

“Yes, of course,” I said curiously. “Seriously though… Nothing’s wrong? Is Jasper okay?”

He shook his head and swallowed slowly. "Nothing is wrong. He's fine." Edward sighed and looked up to the ceiling. "It's just… if I tell you now, I know nothing will get done. And that's fine if you want me to tell you now, but I think it'll be easier if-"  

I stopped him. "It's okay. I trust you. Don't worry. You're covering your ass. I have been advised, and I agree with your judgment. I'd like to get this over with," I told him honestly. I put my hand on his cheek. "It's okay, I promise." 

“Okay. Yeah. Let’s get this over with,” he agreed. He sucked in a breath through his nose and let it out slowly through his mouth. Edward was trying to breathe through his anxiety that he was still obviously feeling. 

It was clear from the beginning that he was not enjoying making the video. I wouldn’t have known when I first met him, but I could see his tells. Certain kinds of fidgeting. The way he spoke. We did Edward’s first, him wanting to get it out of the way. I would be going last. 

Edward was a mix of Scottish, Irish, English, French, and German. He was, amazingly, 98.8 percent white. Seth taunted him, telling him that he was descended from snow people and not Africa like the rest of us. The phrase Eddie is part yeti was muttered. 

Seth was a mixture of Chinese, Korean, and a little Japanese with the rest being a mix of European. Tyler was mainly English, but he had a good portion of Iberian and Native American, too. Lauren was pretty much European also, but she had a surprising dose of Middle Eastern and North African she had no idea about.   

Finally, it was my turn. 

I could see the strain on Edward's face behind the camera as I sat down. He was sitting too, and he had several papers in his fidgeting hands. He was having trouble keeping his actor's mask in place. I could see it slipping slowly. I knew I had to make up for it.  

“So, I hope everyone brought their money. I imagine there is some sort of bet on what I am,” I said sarcastically, resting my chin on my knuckles. They liked their bets. 

“I still say Latino of some sort,” Tyler replied. “I got ten on it.”

“Asian!” Seth shouted with a laugh. “We’re like half the planet. It’s good odds.”

 "So, what am I?" I asked my boyfriend with a smile. Edward tried to return it, but it was small. He swallowed heavily again before he began to read the results.  

"You are 48.8 percent Native American, mostly coming from the Pacific Northwest of America," he began, looking up at me to see my reaction through his thick eyelashes. "30.2 French-German. 10 percent English. 3.5 West African, 3.2 Ashkenazi Jew, and the rest is unidentifiable.".  

I laughed loudly. "What? Really? Wow, okay. Um, I think I just heard a little Jewish woman in Queens squeal," I told him in a giggle. "Esther is going to be so happy. So… my dad was probably mostly Native American. I bet I have some on both sides," I said thoughtfully. "You were right, though!" 

He nodded his head slowly. “So, how does it make you feel?”

"I know nothing about Native American culture, to be honest. That's going to change now, for sure. I wish there were a way to figure out who exactly, you know? Like which nation or peoples?" I thought out loud. "I wish they taught more about it in school." 

“Would you mind giving Bella and I some privacy?” Edward asked, turning off the cameras with the remote in his hand. 

"Yeah, sure." Lauren pulled Tyler out when she saw his grave expression, Seth following quickly behind. They took their laptops so they could mess around with their results. It came with more information than what we were going over in the video.  

“Baby, you’re being ominous. That’s my job,” I teased him, still sitting behind the desk. He was sitting in the chair beside the cameras, looking over a paper in his hands. He was having trouble looking at me. 

“Um… So, I got an email this morning from the DNA site,” he began slowly, licking his lips. “I did the full service, including connecting family members. And it linked one of your relatives. I didn’t know because I didn’t open the emails until just now, so it would be a surprise for me, too.”

“Oh!” I said in shock. Oh, that’s why he thought I would get emotional.  “Well, that’s cool. On my mother’s side?” He shook his head slowly. “My father’s side? I don’t suppose it’s my father,” I said sarcastically. He shook his head again. “Never that easy,” I smirked a little. “Okay, so… Do have an auntie or a cousin or something?” I asked him. 

A tear slipped over Edward's cheek. Sarcasm was done. I got up quickly and went over to him, wrapping my arms around his neck.  

“I’m sorry, I’m a mess right now. Um, you received an email from your family. It’s actually several people.”

“Oh, I have several people?” I said softly, rubbing his cheek to smooth away the teardrops. “Why don’t you read me this letter? It must be something if you’re already in tears.”

"Yeah. Okay." He wiped his cheek, but his voice was a little rough. Edward cleared his throat before he began, "dear Ms. Swan, it was always our father's greatest wish that he would be able to one day write this message. He's gone now, but I promised him that I would never stop searching for you. I always knew I had an older half-sister that my father never met, but I never actually thought I would get this chance to actually talk to you. Our father-" he stopped, his hand over his mouth as he cried heavily for a moment before pulling himself together. "Our father searched for you for years, and even as he was dying of cancer, it was his greatest hope that he would one day get to meet you. He-" my boyfriend stopped, covering his eyes with his hand.  

I leaned my forehead against his. I was crying though I don't remember when I started exactly. Edward closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "He didn't know your name. Just Swan. He wanted to marry your mother, but when they found out she was pregnant, your grandfather actually shot him. In the leg. Upper thigh." 

Shot. Him. My grandfather. My grandfather shot my father.

His words sunk in slowly. 

“Oh, of course! He shot him,” I laughed through my tears. “It says that?” I asked him. He nodded slowly. “What else does it say?”

“You’re Quileute. Your brother and all of your cousins live on a reservation in Washington State.”

“My brother,” I cried out the word. “Does it have his name?”

"Jacob. Your father's name was William Black, but he went by Billy, apparently." He lifted the paper. "You also have twin sisters. Their names are Rachel and Rebecca. Jacob is twenty-seven, and your sisters are twenty-five." 

“Oh, god. You definitely made the right choice in waiting to tell me,” I laughed as I cried rivers, snot coming from my nose. “Oh, my god,” I sobbed, leaning my head against his shoulder. He held me tightly. “My father was looking for me. He wanted me. Oh, god. He wanted me,” I repeated over and over again as I cried into his shoulder. 

"He went to school in Houston. He and your mother were dating. When… when he was hurt, he went home, to Washington, to heal, and when he came back to find you, your grandparents had moved and he couldn't." 

“It was stupidly easy to disappear in Houston the eighties. Houston was actually known for it. People just up and disappearing forever. Did he call the police?” I whined, hating my random crime knowledge at that moment. “I didn’t know.”

"I know, love… He- He didn't want your grandfather to get arrested," he whispered. "According to the letter. Jacob gives an account of what his father told him because he's not sure what you know, and he wants to compare notes." 

“Oh, well, I’ll just have to email him back and tell him I know nothing,” I laughed bitterly. “Not a goddamn thing.”

“He sent his phone number,” Edward informed me quietly. “If you want to call him.”

I nodded slowly, pulling back from him. He tugged a tissue from his pocket and began to wipe my cheeks. He was prepared. 

"My father's name is Billy Black," I said, almost emotionlessly.  

“Yes, it is.”

“That’s not what I expected to learn today,” I whispered. 

“Me either,” he breathed, wiping his own face with the tissue. 

“Bella Black would have been a really dope name,” I said with a little laugh, using my long sleeve to wipe my smudged eyes. 

“Yeah, it would have been,” Edward said with a soft chuckle. “Here,” he gave me the letter to read. He had told me most of the important information from the sheet. Jacob’s number was on the bottom. 

“Can you dial for me? I’m shaking,” I told him quietly. He nodded at me and pulled out the phone in his pocket. Quickly he typed out the number and put it on speaker with his own trembling finger. It rang and rang until it reached the voice mailbox. 

“Hi, you’ve reached Jacob Black. Please leave a message after the beep,” my half brother’s voice said. It was very deep. 

I took a deep breath as it dinged. "Um, hi. My name is Bella Swan, and I was… I just wanted to let you know- Let you know that I got your email," I tried to hold in my tears. I could barely talk. "I hope that uh- That we can talk soon. You can reach me back at this number. I'll also write you an email with more contact information in a little bit. Okay. Um, I hope that you're having a good day. Bye." 

I pressed the red end bottom. 

"Are you okay?" Edward asked. I shook my head slowly. "Okay. Once I somehow stop the tears, I'll tell everyone that we need to have some real privacy." 

"I have so many people to talk to and so many things I should do, but all I want to do is lay down and be held." 

“Then we’ll do that. That’s fine, love. There is nothing you need to do right now,”  he promised. “We can-” 

The phone rang. It was still sitting on my lap as I sat on Edward's. We both looked at it, and I knew it was the number we had just dialed. With a shaking finger, I answered it and put it on the speaker again.  

“Hi,” I breathed out. 

“Bella?” The deep male voice said quickly. 

“Yeah.” 

“Oh, my god,” he began to cry. “I found you. Oh, my god, I really found you.”

I began to cry harder, both hands going over my mouth. There was snot running violently from my nose. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were looking for me. I didn’t know anything.”

“Nothing?” He questioned. 

“I didn’t… I didn’t even have a name. I didn’t know his name. I just found out that I’m half Native American like twenty minutes ago. Literally. And, I thought I was like… Mexican,” I laughed through tears. “Being from Texas and all. I’m so sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?” He laughed, still tearful too. “You didn’t know.”

“I’m sorry that my grandfather shot our father. What- what happened?”

"He put a twenty-two bullet in his leg, told him if he came back, he would aim higher next time. It put him in a wheelchair for the rest of his life," Jacob said in a quiet voice.  

“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?” I shouted. “That racist piece of shit! Why the hell didn’t he call the damn cops on that fucking lunatic? What the hell!”

I heard the voice on the other side of the phone sigh heavily. “He didn’t want to do that to your mom.”

“He should have called for my mom.” I shook my head. “How did he get away with it? You can’t exactly hide a gunshot wound.”

“Said it was a hunting accident,” he sighed again. ”He said your mom was terrified of your grandparents. He was scared they would hurt her if he did.” 

“Oh, I can see why. I’m… I’m so sorry,” I cried again. “That son of a bitch died when I was five. Painfully, too. Goddamnit!" I put my hand on my forehead. My head hurt so much, and I was a little dizzy.  

“What about your mom?” He asked next. 

“She died when I was five, too. My grandma at fifteen. I don’t have any other family living on my mother’s side.”

“I’m sorry,” my half-brother answered. “My mom is gone, too.”

“Was…” Was he a good father was what I wanted to ask, but couldn’t. “What did our father do? Tell me about him,” I asked instead. 

“He was a historian. He went to Sam Houston University,” he answered. 

“That’s a decent school.” I took in a deep breath. “My, um… My late husband was an anthropologist who focused on the medieval European period. Mainly focusing on weapons. He wrote a few textbooks for history courses, actually. I can imagine already they would have enjoyed talking to one another.”

“You’re probably right,” he agreed warmly. “What do you do? What about you?”

“I’m a photographer... “ I looked at Edward and smiled at him. “But, I just started working with my partner. He works in the entertainment industry.”

"That's cool! That's really cool," he sniffled. "I'm a mechanic, but I do some woodworking on the side. Are you still in Texas?" 

“No. Right now I’m actually in Los Angeles. I’ve been living in New York City, though. I’m in the process of moving to LA permanently. Tell me about you.”

“Um,” he took in a deep breath. “I don’t know,” Jacob chuckled. “I can’t honestly think of anything. This shouldn’t be so hard.”

“Are you kidding? This is terrifying,” I laughed. “My entire world changed today. I can barely think right now.”

“Mine too,” he told me quickly. “When I saw your name… God, Dad would be so happy right now. All he ever wanted to do was tell you that he loved you.”

I let out a violent sob, putting my hand over my mouth. Edward held me close, kissing my cheek. 

“That’s all I ever wanted. He loved me, though? Really?”

“He talked about you all the time. He would,” Jacob was crying again too, sniffling loudly into the phone. “He would talk about how he would bring you home one day so that you could see where you’re from and what you’re made up of. God, I haven’t even told the girls yet. Our sisters. I didn’t- I didn’t want to get their hopes up if you didn’t call.”

“I have to tell my sisters, too. My adopted sisters. They’re even twins, too,” I said with a small smile. “They’re going to be so happy.”

"Ours, too," he promised. "Holy shit! I have a sister!" Jacob shouted, but it wasn't at me. I heard, yeah, two of them, in the background and I laughed. “No! I found her! I found my older sister!” 

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!” The other male voice shouted. “Wait?! Are you on the phone with her now! HEY COUSIN!”

Jacob laughed, the sound of rubbing echoing in the speaker as he tried to obviously wipe away tears. "Shut up, idiot. That's your cousin, Quil. He's a dumbass. I'm sorry." 

I was shaking with silent tears, my hand over my mouth. “It’s okay,” I tried to say lightly. “How many cousins do we have?”

“A fuckton.”

I laughed loudly, “well, that’s cool. I didn’t have any growing up.”

“Now you have too many,” Quil shouted at the phone. I guess he put me on speaker, too. 

“I don’t think that’s possible,” I said truthfully. “I can’t wait to meet y’all.”

“We can’t wait to meet you, too,” my brother replied quickly. 

"Let me know, and we'll arrange a visit for as soon as possible," Edward told me softly. He was still crying for me, but not hard like I was. He had little tears streaming down his face. We both must have been splotchy.  

“Who’s that?” Quil asked. 

“The man I’m going to marry,” I answered, smoothing my hand over Edward’s cheek. He smiled at me brilliantly. “He’s the one that arranged the DNA test, actually.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much. What’s your name?” My half-brother said quickly. 

“Edward Cullen,” he replied as he pushed his cheek in my palm. “And it is, absolutely, my pleasure.”

“I know that name,” Quil sort of whispered. I laughed. I wasn’t surprised. Then I realized something. My family might actually already know me. They might have known my face. I almost felt sick. What did they think of me?

“Do you like YouTube?” I tried to ask lightly. 

“Yeah,” Quil said slowly. “Wait… Eddie Cullen! Dude! Dude! Dude!” He began to shout. 

“Ow! Stop fucking hitting me!” Jacob shouted at our cousin. “What is wrong with you?”

“What’s her name?” Quil demanded. 

“Bella,” I answered for him. 

“SHE’S THE ONE FROM THE VIDEO!” He shouted again. Both Edward and I started laughing a little. I leaned my head back, taking in a deep breath. There were a lot of videos. “The wings. That funny as fuck video I showed you with the spicy chicken wings challenge with the tiny chick.”

“What?” Jacob asked in confusion. It wasn’t directed at us. “Wait. For real?”

"Yeah. I'd be the tiny chick," I said with a quiet laugh. "Those wings were excellent." 

“You’re insane,” Edward laughed, hugging his arms around me tightly. He pushed his head into my neck for a second.  

“You’re fucking hilarious,” Quil told me abruptly. “Jake’s wife loves your cooking videos, too.”

“Aw, you’re married!” I said excitedly. “That’s great!”

“She’s going to flip when she hears this,” Jacob said excitedly. “Really, though? That’s you in the videos?”

“Yeah, it is.”

"I've been watching you for months." There was a pause, and then he laughed, "I've been watching my sister for fucking months." 

“I guess I know what we’re doing tonight. Family YouTube night,” Quil said animatedly, speaking to my brother. “I’ve got to get to work. I look forward to speaking to you again soon, Bella!”

“Me too!” I said brightly. 

“I actually need to go back to work, too. I’m just on my lunch break,” Jake said quietly. “Can I call you back tonight?”

“Please do,” I said eagerly. “Thank you for calling and emailing me. I don’t know if I could explain all that you’ve given me today. I never thought I’d know my father’s name.”

“I didn’t think I’d ever know yours.”

“Isabella Marie Swan. It’s very nice to meet you,” I laughed, wiping more snot from my cheek. It was disgusting. I felt on the edge of being hysterical.

"Jacob Wolfe Black. But, you can call me Jake," he chuckled. "Alright, Bella. I will call you this evening. Nine, okay?" 

“That’s perfect. Have a good day at work.”

“You too.”

I hung up the phone, and we sat in silence for a while.  

“So, like… What do you think? Should I just start going to therapy five days a week for a while?” I said sarcastically. 

“Twice a week is probably good.” He smiled weakly. 

“There are still people out there,” I pointed out to my boyfriend. “I can’t go out there.”

“Shit. Yeah. I know. Okay.” Edward took a deep breath and patted my thigh, signaling that he wanted me to stand. I did so and went to his couch, laying down on it. 

My phone was in the kitchen. I didn’t want to bring it to his office while he was filming. I needed to tell Alice and Rose. Mrs. Lettie, too. Esther, even. I didn’t know if I could yet. My heart was beating wildly in my chest. 

Edward leaned over and kissed my forehead before going into the living room to talk to our friends, shutting the door behind him. 

I began to wildly cry as soon as the door shut, both hands covering my eyes, and I violently shook with my tears. I wasn’t sure how long he was gone for, but I felt him scoop me up. Quickly I pressed my face into his chest, letting him take me wherever he wanted. Edward gently laid me in the middle of our bed then crawled in beside me.   

He let me sob until I had nothing else left in my body, hugging me close to him. After maybe thirty minutes of just silent cuddling, I finally spoke. 

“Can you get me my phone?” I asked my sweet boyfriend quietly. My voice was rough. 

“Yeah.” He quickly produced it from his pocket, handing it to me. I put it on the bed in between us. 

“Thank you for taking such good care of me. Thank you for doing this for me,” I said almost desperately, quickly kissing him. He shook his head.  

“I didn’t do anything, Bella.”

“Yes, you did. This is more than what I was feeling in New York, by so much. Don’t you understand that you’ve literally given me everything I’ve ever wanted? You love me, unconditionally and extravagantly. You’ve given me a chance at a successful career in a field I dreamed about being in for decades. And I was already so excited because you’re giving me this huge wonderful family with your grandparents, sisters, and nieces when we get married. Then to top it off, you give me the name of the only person I desperately wanted to know the name of. My father. He looked for me. He loved me,” I wept again. “And, he didn’t even know me. And… You’ve given it all to me.”

I was moving back towards hysterical again and needed to calm down. 

"I love you," Edward whispered, crying again himself. My poor sweet, sensitive man. I pulled his face to mine and kissed him for several minutes until we stopped crying.  

Laying with my head on his chest, I brought my phone up to text Alice. She had already sent a message inquiring about the results. Demetri, too. Everyone was, of course, insanely curious about my origin story. Everyone loves a good mystery. I decided to start with Alice. She could tell everyone else for me. 

"I'm Native American, and my Father's name is Billy Black. " 

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