Imperfectpictures

6/5/2019

Episode Forty-nine: Terrible Question

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Episode Forty-Nine: Terrible Questions

The next day was Saturday. Edward invited some of his friends over for pizza and beer after I prompted him to spend more time with them. I didn't want him to miss out on any more time with his friends than he already had.

I was feeling a lot better and was enjoying being outside in the warm night with them, talking and laughing as we relaxed on the back deck. I lounged on an outdoor couch with Edward, my body leaning against his side. Jasper sat on the other side of me, his arms spread out comfortably over the back of the couch with his foot resting on his knee.

In all, there was Edward, Jasper, Lucy and her boyfriend Marcus, James, Kelly, and Felix as well. Lucy had brought a new drinking card game with her, and the boys had gotten a bottle of tequila to play with it.

“I hate tequila,” I complained in a pout to Edward.

“You shouldn't drink anyway,” he said protectively, looking at the bottle.

“Okay,” I laughed. “Why? I'm fine now, Dad.”

“Oh, okay,” he laughed at my biting tone. “I see.”

“Yeah, you do,” I said sarcastically, bobbing my head as I did. “After your mother, I deserve a damn drink. Or, twelve.”

Jasper laughed, “what would you like instead?” He offered to go inside to the bar, standing up.

“Mm, whiskey,” I replied with a smile. “Thank you.”

“Why don't you like tequila?” Kelly asked, her feet resting in her boyfriend's lap as she nursed her third beer. Lucy was quickly setting up the game on the coffee table in front of us.

"I sneezed it out my nose when I was like sixteen and ever since I've not been a fan," I admitted to them. Her eyes got wide, and she clapped her hand over her face, making me laugh. "I literally burned my nose hairs out. Oh, god, it was so bad."

“Good god.” Edward made an amused but pained face.

Jasper came back with the bottle and put in on the coffee table in front of me. When he sat back down, he propped my feet up on his lap since they had taken up his spot. He merely lifted them and plopped them back down before getting comfortable again.

"Alright," Lucy started, holding her hand up, "so this game is called Terrible Questions. We go around taking turns. You pick a person and then you pick a card. The card will have some random question on it. It might be an easy, normal question, or it might be a really embarrassing question. You can choose not to answer any question by taking a shot. Everyone starts with five shots. You're out when you're out of shots," she explained, reading off the instructions. "So, I guess it's possible to gang up on someone and try to get them out of the game or whatever. Also, if the group thinks you're lying, it can be taken to a vote, and if you lose the vote, you have to take a shot. So, be honest."

"Are you worried about what you'll learn about Tony?" Felix asked me jokingly. He had an extremely deep voice to go along with his fantastic height. He was comfortingly rubbing his girlfriend's back as she leaned into him.

“Oh, no the opposite,” I smirked, glancing up at my boyfriend who caught my eye with a smile. “My skeletons are so much more interesting.” He winked down at me, making me giggle. He was already a little warm and drunk, his entire body comfortably relaxed.

“I'll go first. We'll go clockwise. So, Marcus, you'll be next. Jasper, I pick you,” Lucy pointed at her friend with an evil smirk on her face.

“Oh, Lu... you're so mean,” he teased, placing his hand on his heart like he was hurt. “Bring it, bitch.”

She picked up a card and looked at him in disappointment that it wasn’t more interesting. “Oh, it's an easy one. What's your favorite song?”

“Oh, um,” he hummed as he looked at me, thinking. Jasper smacked his lips dramatically as he tried to make a decision. He was being a showoff for me. “Pretty Pimpin by Kurt Vile,” he said when it finally popped into his head.

“I like that song,” I said with a little smile. “Then I woke up this morning and didn't recognize the man in the mirror. Then I laughed and said silly me, that's just me,” Jasper grinned and nodded his head as I sang out my favorite parts of the song. He began to wiggle dance in his seat to my singing. “But he was sporting all my clothes. I gotta say, pretty pimpin.”

“Yes,” he grinned at me happily. “I listen to it every morning when I shower.”

“It's in my shower mix, too,” I told him. He high fived me, making me laugh loudly. “I wanna see the rest of your list now.”

“We'll compare later.” He tapped his bottle of beer to mine.

Marcus smiled wickedly as he pointed at Jasper when it was his turn.

“Oh, I think they've chosen a target already,” Edward teased his best friend with a smirk.

“It's fine because I'm shameless.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

“What is your favorite kind of porn?” Marcus read the card with a laugh. Lucy took it from him to look at it, also laughing. That's the kind of question she wanted.

“Amateur type shit. Seriously, you'll have to do better than that. I will pull up my favorite video right now,” Jasper told them all, pointing his beer at them.

Kelly was next. “Bella.” She picked the card from the top of the pile. “When is the last time you cried?”

That wasn't an embarrassing question. “I had a good cry in the shower when I came home from the hospital because I was cramping so bad.” I pouted out my bottom lip. “But then Eddie gave me weed, chocolate, and snuggles and I felt better.”

“Fucking cramps,” Kelly agreed, understanding my pain completely.

“Wait, you smoke weed now, Tony?” James asked him, making a little face like he was impressed. “Jasper finally talked you into it?”

“My therapist recommended it for my insomnia. It helps,” he replied to him, boredom tinting his voice. He wasn't going to be teased by them about that.

Felix pointed at Edward. “You.” He whipped a card from the top of the pile. “Have you ever broken the law?”

“Uhhhh...” he drew out as he thought about it, “Well, yes. I suppose I’ve traveled with drugs. Weed. Not that anyone really cares about that.” He shook his head. “I don't think anything else though.”

It was Jasper's turn. He tapped my foot and reached for a card. “Ms. Bella, what is a disgusting smell that you like?”

"Cigarette smoke," I said in a little sigh as I thought about it. "Or, maybe cigars. A cigar shop is the best. I used to get them all the time for my father in law, and I would spend so much time in the humidor."

“Do you smoke?” He questioned me curiously.

"I smoked on and off from about fourteen until about maybe twenty-three. I still occasionally have one because some of my friends smoke. Alice quit two years ago, but she was a heavier smoker than me. I'd have one every couple of days, and then I'd go out and party and have five in a night. You know, maybe a pack a month. If that."

“I wish I could quit all the way,” Jasper complained to me. “I'm down to one a day. Work is too stressful to quit right now,” he sighed.

“Yeah, I can understand that. Well, don't feel bad about it. You'll quit when you're ready. We all need our vices. Kelly,” I pointed at her. Jasper got a card for me so I could read it to her. “Has your current partner ever embarrassed you and if so, how?”

She picked up her shot and threw it back, smiling at Felix wildly as she did. She earned giggles from the group.

“Jasper,” Edward smiled over to his best friend. He lifted up the top card and burst into laughter at the question. “I know this one. What is the dumbest thing you've done drunk?”

"Oh shit," Jasper began to laugh. "Remember when we were in the dorms, and the whole lot of us stripped nude and ran bare ass through the quad to the girls? Then the girls chased us back. That was the first time I saw tits in person. Bless," he said fondly with a laugh, taking a drink of his beer. "We were like... Sixteen, maybe?"

“Lucky girls,” I teased them, pushing his thigh with my foot. “It was probably a good thing my school didn't have dorms because there were enough pregnancies already.”

We went around again, and this time Kelly picked Edward. She was already down two shots, and it showed on her light pink cheeks. "Oo, this is a good one. Who is your celebrity pass?"

“Oh no!” Lucy laughed, “Bella, is this going to get him in trouble since he's an actual celebrity?”

“No, of course not,” I laughed at her reaction, “I don't care who he fucks.”

“Really?” Felix asked me in surprise, not believing me.

Edward looked at me curiously, with a small smirk on his face. “Well, yeah,” I said as I looked at my lover. “So, I look at it this way... Sex is a biological impulse. You can't control who you have those feelings for sometimes. Sometimes he's going to have them for someone else. So will I. The difference is that he loves me. He wants to come home to me. He wants to tell me about his day, and he wants to wake up beside me. Having sex with someone else is not going to change the love he feels for me. It's like having a best friend and then hanging out with another friend. Just because you have fun with one doesn't mean you don't enjoy spending time with the other. I mean, I hope he talks to me about it somewhere in the process, before or right after, but I know he respects me enough that it won't be a problem.” He stroked the back of my neck during my little soapbox rant. I decided to lighten my answer a little. “But, I need you to know if you ever get a chance you have to bang Jennifer Lawrence's brains out for both of us.”

Edward threw his head back in laughter, “yes, ma'am.”

“What celebrity would you want to bang?” I teased my boyfriend. “Besides Jennifer.”

“Mm, Rihanna,” he answered, still amused and smiling from my last comments.

“Oh, good choice.” I nodded my head approval. He chuckled. “Ohhhh... You like tiny tattooed chicks with a little tan. Okay, that makes sense.” I nodded again, making him look away in a shy way while still smiling himself. I hit that nail right on the head. “Good to know.”

“We can schedule that next tattoo whenever you want, love.” He grinned at me happily.

Jasper picked me again. “Alright baby, what is your favorite song to fuck to?”
I laughed, “I have like a whole big list that I like. Hm...” I laid my head back against Edward as I thought about it. “This song called Keep Lying is probably my favorite right now. I found it just recently. Or, a song called So Good. Overall is probably Sextape by the Deftones. I guess it depends on the sex.”

“I don't know any of those,” Jasper admitted.

I glanced back at Edward who was obviously trying to think if he had heard any of those particular songs. I laughed to myself. “Yes, we've had sex to them.”

“I don't know any of the names,” he admitted with a slightly embarrassed shrug.

“You'll know them when you hear them. I'll refresh your memory later,” I whispered the last part as he leaned in and pressed a kiss to my mouth lightly. I picked a card. “So, sweetheart, who in this room would you consider the sluttiest?”

“Jasper,” Edward said instantly. Jasper slapped the back of his friend's head with the hand that was resting behind his head on the sofa.

“Eh, fuck you.” he flipped him off jokingly.

“James,” my boyfriend pointed to one of his other friends, still amused with himself. “What is the last thing you texted?”

James decided to just drink instead of answering when he saw what he had put. He just shook his head. “Nope, not going to do it.”

Three or four rounds later Kelly, Lucy, and James were all out, and Felix and Marcus had a shot left each. Jasper and I both had all of ours left, and Edward had only drunk one shot. He refused to answer a question about how much he masturbated. He gave me an evil look as I cackled beside him, starting to feel drunk off of my own beers.

“I don't understand why you can't answer that question, honey,” I smirked at him.

“I'm sure you don't,” he replied back sarcastically.

Marcus picked me next, “a scale of one to ten, how attractive is the person to the right of you?”

I looked at Jasper who smiled widely at me, playfully. He batted his eyelashes at me, putting his hand under his chin as he hammed it up beside me. “I think he's a solid eight. I haven't seen the whole package, so I reserve the last two points until I can make a better judgment.”

“Aw,” he patted my foot that was still on my lap, “you're such a sweet little dove.”

“Why do you call me dove?” I questioned curiously.

“Because you're a pretty bird, obviously,” he said back smoothly. I rolled my eyes. He knew I didn’t believe him. “My grandpa used to call all the ladies that,” he said a bit more honestly. “I like it.”

“Me too.”

Jasper slapped Edward surprisingly on the back of the head before leaning down to pick up his card for his turn. “What is your favorite food?”

"Mm, that chicken in the cheese sauce that you make," he said, his lips were close to my ear as he rested his head on my shoulder. "With the potatoes and toast. With lots of wine. Those fucking potatoes though, in the sauce. Mm.”

“I'll make it for you again soon,” I promised him, nuzzling his cheek.

Marcus got out on a question about boogers. Felix picked me again. “At what age did you lose your virginity?”

"Oh," I thought about taking a shot, but I was pretty shameless. I would have to talk to my boyfriend about it at some point. It's definitely something I had thought about. "I can actually tell you an exact date but I won't because it makes me feel terrible because my boyfriend was literally a toddler, but I lost my virginity the day after my thirteenth birthday.”

“Oh, no no no,” Edward said, sitting up a little bit to look at me in worry. “Surely not. I would rip the testicles off of any boy that tried to touch Ruby or Chloe at that age. Or, Claire for that matter. And she’s not even related to me.”

I touched his cheek, smiling at him a little. “And, that's because you're going to make an amazing father.”

“Thirteen is so young,” Jasper said a bit sadly for me.

"I had been doing other things before that, honestly. I was dating someone who was working at my church. It was the only place I went. He was like seventeen. So, fun fact, never leave your kids alone at church. There is so much fucking going on in there," I said in a joking tone, but I actually meant it.

“Have you had sex in a church?” Jasper asked, playfully scandalized.

“Sugar, I lost my virginity on the roof of a Catholic church in the rain. Might have been downright romantic if it hadn't smelled like tar,” I thickened my accent as I made a little face. “Not ideal. It wasn't exactly memorable or good for me. The more interesting question would be to ask when the first time you had good sex was.”

“Oh, that is a better question,” Jasper agreed with me. “Do you remember that though?”

"Hm," I leaned my head back against Edward. "I dated this really great guy in high school named Chris." I smiled as I remembered him. He was one of my favorite boyfriends. I still wondered how he was doing sometimes. "He was so sweet. We dated off and on for ages. He went off to college, and that ended though. But this is when we were using dial-up, so ages ago. Last time I talked to him, he was working for Lockheed Martin designing computer systems for military planes. He's one of the few people I dated in high school I wouldn't be totally horrified to have a conversation with right now. I wonder if he's still crazy short. He was like five foot two at eighteen."

“Five-two is so short,” Lucy made a face. “Too short for me.”

“It's fine. It's probably because God just decided to put those inches somewhere else,” I told her over my beer, making my eyes wide. I earned the laugh I was aiming for. “He would be high on my top five of most well-endowed men I have ever been with.”

“Is Tony on that list?” Kelly wiggled her shoulders at me, earning a laugh from my boyfriend. His arm went around my waist, burying his face in my hair from behind.

“Oh boy, is he,” I laughed, getting the giggles as I felt him laugh in my hair. He squeezed my side, making me squeak and laugh harder.

“It's okay for you to start taking those shots now,” Edward joked with me.

“First, liquor won't help. And baby, do you want me to lie and say you're not the biggest because I can if that's what you want,” I teased him. He pinched more of my fat on my stomach, making me cackle at his discomfort. I tilted my head back all the way so that Edward could press a kiss to my mouth. He held my face with one of his big hands.

“You are so bad for my inflated ego,” he said when he pulled away, bemusement evident on his face.

“Good,” I smirked.

“Bella,” Jasper called on me as he picked up one of the little white cards. “Worst habit?”

“Chewing my nails,” I reached for a card and pushed on Jasper's knee with my foot. “Favorite show.”

“Game of Thrones.”

It was Edward's turn. He got Felix out on whether or not he's ever peed in a pool. “You do realize that answers the question, right?” Edward asked him as he finished his final shot. He threw his hands up in the air, just giving up.

“Come on,” James complained. “This is going to go on forever. Jasper will say anything out loud. He has no fucking filter. And Tony has just gotten lucky so far.”

“That means Bella is the wild card,” Felix commented.

“Wild as in she's just as shameless as him?” Edward looked over at his best friend and smirked.

“Well excuse me, cowboy. I'm pretty sure you like that about me.” I stuck my tongue out at him.

“Jasper, have you ever cheated on a partner,” Edward asked his friend, ignoring my words and making me snicker happily. Yeah, I knew what he liked.

“Nope,” he popped the p with his lips.

“Let's gang up on him,” I told my boyfriend.

“Okay, Bella. I see how it's going to be,” he said as he picked up a card and pointed to me. “Who in this room would you kiss if you could? Besides the obvious.”

“Mm,” I pretended to think about it. “Lucy. She’s adorable.”

“Oh, bullshit,” Edward laughed loudly. I turned to look at him seriously. “Nope. I call bullshit. You're lying.”

“Oo, am I?” I replied loudly back, turning to look at him fully.

“Yes, you are. You know you are. Take a fucking shot.” He pointed down at my untouched whiskey, way too amused with what was happening right then. My cheeks were turning red.

I rolled my eyes and reached for the shot glass, downing it quickly. He smiled in triumph as he poured my next shot of whiskey.

“Oh, who do you want to kiss, dove?” Jasper asked curiously, looking at me. He put his face very close to mine, making a funny expression as he did. I gave him a peck on the nose. “Awwww.”

“I shouldn't have said anything to you,” I complained when I looked back to my boyfriend.

“Well, you did,” he chuckled.

"Wait, is it actually me?" Jasper asked. I took another shot, making Edward throw his head back in laughter. I decided to take another shot since they were choosing to tease me.
“Oh look, Jasper. You win,” I said sarcastically. “And if you two are going to wrestle around like idiots on top of each other like that, I'm sorry, I'm going to have those thoughts whether I want them or not.”

“I know,” Kelly agreed drunkenly before laughing. She fanned her face with her hand. “Yes, please.”

“Right?” I motioned my hand toward her. “It's not fair to do that to my hormones. Don't stop though.”

Edward took his shot and leaned his head back against the couch as he laughed. He was clearly starting to get embarrassed by the thing he started. I watched as he rolled his options around in his mouth, his tongue playing with his teeth. “What was your request before? Shirtless?” He was going to go with sassy. He was several drinks ahead of me.

“You can do it in the nude if you're taking requests. I'll go get the olive oil for you,” I said dryly to him, earning a loud laugh from Jasper. “We can go old school Greek up in here.”

“And get covered in sand? No, thank you.” Edward made a little face, making me laugh. He smiled at our playfulness and brought my mouth to his in a quick kiss. “Funny girl.”

“That's code for 'what a pain in my ass,' I told the group with a smirk.

“Only a little sometimes,” he teased me further, kissing my cheek. “Why don't we try a less embarrassing game? Mario Kart?”

We moved inside, and everyone refreshed their beers and drinks. With each passing game, they were getting louder and louder, throwing insults at each other as they did. Edward sat at my feet again against the couch, my legs dangling over one of his shoulders. Jasper was beside me at the end of the sofa, playing aggressively and with his whole body. Edward was stock still beside his fingers. They had two very different play styles.

Kelly and Felix went home after a while, leaving Lucy, Marcus, James, and Jasper. Lucy was watching the four boys play while she leaned heavily against her boyfriend on the loveseat. James was the loudest of the bunch, screaming whenever he started to lose. It was very much grating on my nerves. And then he said something too far.

“You stupid fucking queer,” James shouted at Jasper as he threw a blue shell at him and knocked him back into the last place in the stupid game. I could feel Jasper stiffen angrily beside me. I didn't look at him.

“Excuse me, James,” I called to him to get his attention in the sweetest voice I could muster. “I realize you are Edward's friend, so I'll ask this nicely the first time... Please don't use that word as an insult.”

"What?" He said, confused. The race was still going, and he wasn't looking at me.

“Queer. Don't use it as a slur.”

“I'm just fucking around, I don't mean it,” James told me as the race ended. He came in third, much to his annoyance. “It's not like there is anyone gay here anyway.”

"Oh? Are you sure about that?" I asked him, starting to get angrier. I leaned forward, my hands clasped tightly in my lap as I stared at him. "Are you totally sure no one in this room considers themselves gay? One hundred percent sure?"

Edward put his controller down in his lap, leaning his head against my knee that was on his shoulder, “I'll give you a hint,” he said in a fake loud whisper. “It's her, dumbass,” he deadpanned.

"No, she's not. She's dating you." James rolled his eyes at us, taking a drink of his beer. He was acting as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. I opened my mouth to answer, but Jasper beat me to it.

"That's not how that works!" Jasper snarled beside me, nearly shouting it.

"I'm pretty sure that's exactly how that works. She's fucking a man right now; therefore she is straight." He made a face like we were the ones being stupid assholes and he was the normal one. I had heard this argument before.

"Hey-" Edward started to say, but Jasper's anger bubbled over before he could say anything else.

“Jesus Christ, James. You're such an ass! You need to apologize to her,” he actually shouted at him, pointing at him with a clenched fist and single finger directed like a dagger towards him.

“What the fuck is your problem?” James demanded.

“My fucking problem is you. You're being a disgusting bigot. You're not fucking funny. That's not how that works. You can be in a relationship with one sex and still be attracted to the other. It's not that fucking complicated. You're just being a douche. I don't even know why the fuck I hang around you anymore,” he yelled. “You used a slur in her place, you insulted her several times... fucking apologize to Bella!” Jasper demanded, his chest heaving as he finished. He was actually bristling, the hair on his arms standing straight up.

“Christ, I was just joking around. Whatever. Sorry,” the other man snapped, throwing his controller to the side. He didn't look at either of us as he mumbled the words.

“Go fuck yourself with that,” Jasper growled. “That's not an apology.”

“You know, it's getting late. I think I'm going to go.” James stood suddenly from his seat and marched towards the front door. “Jasper, can I talk to you outside for a tick, mate?”

“No,” Jasper said quietly. “I don't think I want to talk to you again.”

It was the second time I had heard that phrase used on the trip. Both times made me feel sad, but I knew that it was probably for the best. At least in this case.

“Fine, whatever,” James snapped again as he slammed the door behind him.

“Sorry,” Jasper muttered quietly, looking down at his hands in his lap that were shaking just a little bit.

“No, you were defending me. I'm sorry I started that,” I told him quickly.

“You didn't do anything wrong,” Edward promptly said to me. He turned to look at his friend, lightly touching a comforting hand on his knee from his spot on the floor. “Hey, man. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I think I'm going to go out and have a smoke real quick,” he mumbled before hopping up from his spot and rushing outside before anyone could say anything to him. The sliding glass door slammed shut behind him, the glass making a little wobbling sound.

Lucy picked up the box for her game. “And on that dramatic note, I think we'll go. Tony, do you have Jasper?”

"Yeah, I'll talk to him." He began to stand, but I stopped him.

"Actually... can I? He was defending me," I asked him. Edward nodded, shifting so that he was sitting on the couch beside me. "I'll be back in a bit," I promised.

Jasper was sitting alone about ten feet away from the lapping water in the sand, his knees drawn up and his head nearly hung between them. He glanced back when he heard me, sniffling and wiping his nose as he did.

“Filthy habit,” he motioned to his hand that held a freshly lit cigarette.

“May I have one?” I asked.

He picked up the pack that was sitting on the sand between his legs and offered me one from it. I sat down beside him and took the long white cigarette from the box. I brought it to my lips, and he lit it for me, cupping the fire from the wind. I wrapped one of my arms around his while quietly enjoying my first cigarette in about a year. My head was on his shoulder, drawing the sharp smoke into my lungs and kissing it out into the wind.

“Fuck him,” Jasper said suddenly in the darkness.

"I can see why you didn't want to come out," I told him quietly. "So, yeah. Fuck him. If you can't be yourself around him, he's not your friend anyway."

“I've just known him for so long,” he complained sadly. “But...” He shook his head. “Yeah. I think I'm done with him.” Jasper wiped a hand across his eyes. “I don't need that in my life. That shit is toxic.”

"It is," I agreed with him, pressing my temple against the arm I was hugging. As I looked out onto the water, I told him, "Eddie would never make you feel bad about being yourself. He loves you so much."

“I know,” he whispered, taking a drag from his cigarette. The cherry glowed hot red in the darkness, the smoke curling from his lips as he swallowed back some of his emotions. He sighed and looked over at me. “I'm glad he's got you. You're good for him.”

“Yeah?” I rested my hand on top of his, lightly rubbing the pads of my finger soothingly over it.

“Yeah.” Jasper looked back out at the ocean again. “Sorry about the wrestling thing.”

“Please don't stop on account of me,” I said with a smirk, making him chuckle. “I think he likes it, too.”

“I know I do,” he smirked back, taking a drag and raising his eyebrows at me as he did. I giggled, making him actually laugh as well. He leaned his head against the top of mine. “I'm glad it was you that came out here.”

“Me too.”

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