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​Life has not always been good to Bella Swan. Born mixed race in the deep south, orphaned as a child, and made a widow at a young age, she uses her photography not only as a way to make money but as a way to grow and heal after serious trauma. Luckily she has wonderful friends by her side to help her, too. She’s not unhappy, but she’s barely scraping by. 

Everything changes though when she’s offered a job taking pictures of up and coming Australian actor, Edward Cullen, for a full week. 

Eddie seems almost picture perfect. Kind, handsome, intelligent, rich. But, we are always more than what we appear in a snapshot.

A Sexy Serial Soap opera

Rated M for Mature, intended for an adult audience. Reader Discretion is advised.





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9/30/2019

Episode Ninety-four: A Fish Called Wanda

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Episode Ninety-four: A Fish Called Wanda 


“So, pick anything,” Tyler said when we got back to his place after eating our somewhat spicy wings. We didn’t go crazy. He had the container of VHS tapes ready and waiting for us on the table. “I’m going to make some popcorn. Would you like some as well?”

“Yes, please,” I answered distractedly as I looked at our selection. There were at least fifty movies in the big cardboard box. There was everything from horror to kids’ films. Some of them I had never heard of, some of them I owned on VHS back in the day as well. The whole thing made me smile.  

Tyler went off to go prepare the snacks while I pulled some out onto the wooden table beside it, trying to see what was on the bottom. A few moments later, he popped his head out of the doorway. “I’ve got Whoppers, Junior Mints, and M&Ms if you want some chocolate to go with it. I like to mix it myself.” 

I smiled to myself. “Juniors Mints! I haven’t had them in ages. I love them in popcorn. That would be great.” I wasn’t sure when was the last time that I had sat down to watch a movie at home with popcorn. Alice and I had gone to the movies in Port Angeles and just saw some dumb chick flick that I couldn’t even remember the name of now. 

“Soda?” He asked next. I nodded in response when he peeked out again. “I think we’ve got orange and grape right now.”

“I’ll take an orange.” I picked one to look at the back of the box. “Wow, so many choices. So, can it be a movie that I’ve seen before? Does it matter?” I questioned as I picked up an old Disney movie in the white shell. It had a very distinct eighties’ plastic smell. 

“Nah, whatever you want. I haven’t seen anything in it yet,” he answered loudly from the kitchen.  

I finally pulled a tape from the pile. It was a comedy that I had seen before, but it had been so long that I couldn’t remember anything about it other than I enjoyed it. I wanted something on the funnier side. It was named ‘A Fish Called Wanda.’ 

“This one.” I lifted up my choice. 

Tyler traded my drink for the movie, nodding his head at my decision. He flipped it over to read the back for himself. “Huh, John Cleese. Nice. Do you like Monty Python?”

“Love it,” I smiled in response. I had watched them all with Aiden. Even the show. 

“We should do one with you and Eddie as my guests. We could do the Holy Grail. That would be so much fun,” he said cheerfully, walking back into the kitchen to get our snacks. 

“I can’t wait,” I giggled as I tried to imagine it. “I wonder if he’s seen it. We haven’t watched many movies together.” 

He sat the bowls onto the table, a box of candy on top of each. “I’m going to get on his nerves quoting it no matter what,” he mumbled under his breath, going to stand beside the 4k television to stick it into the VHS player that was hilariously hooked up to his very modern system. 

Tyler had his camera out, ready to film our reactions and then after we would talk about it together. We sat on the couch with all the remotes that he needed. 

“Alright, kiddo. I’ll do a quick intro, and then we’ll get started,” he directed.

“Got it, boss.” I winked at him and grinned.  

We laughed the entire time it was playing. When it was over, we were both excited to get started with our review.  

“I want to start by thanking Bella,” he began to the camera very seriously, “for picking out some of the weirdest shit that I’ve ever seen. I fucking loved it, but what the actual hell did I just watch?” 

I laughed loudly. “That’s a perfect summary of this Oscar-winning movie. What the fuck?”

"Yup! End of the video! That's it. That's all we need. Bye, guys!" He joked, waving at the camera. I laughed again. "No, so who's your favorite character in this? Like, I have a hard time even narrowing it down. Though Kevin Kline did win an Oscar for best supporting actor for a reason."

“It’s one of those movies where everyone is so interesting, but I have always been a fan of Micheal Palin. There was another movie that this cast did, called Fierce Creatures, and he plays the sort of the opposite of this role. He’s just got such great comedic timing.”

“We are the Knights who say Ni,” Tyler whispered, doing a perfect impression. I burst into giggles.  

We went on for probably an hour about the movie until we heard the front door close. Tyler wrapped up for real then. We went on for way too long, and he was going to have to edit a lot because we screwed around so much. 

"Can we order pizza?" Lauren called loudly as she walked down the hall, she couldn't see us yet. She didn't even say hello. "Can we order from that place with the good vegan Chicago style? You can get you a meat and cheese one. I'll do mine with-" She stopped when she saw me on the couch. "Bella! I forgot you were here! Do you want pizza? You might actually like the kind I get," she chirped very enthusiastically.  

"I don't get a hug. I don't get a greeting," Tyler complained, standing up to kiss his wife. She ignored him, cuddling his waist as he pressed one to her temple. He went off to the kitchen to put the popcorn bowls away. "Yeah, we can get pizza. Whatever you want. Just order it, and I'll add mine." 

“Bella, what do you want?” She said as she plopped down on the couch beside me. Lauren laid her head on my shoulder. “This place has all the veggies and good vegan cheese.” 

I shrugged my other shoulder. “Whatever you want. I’m not super hungry. I’ll try whatever you’re getting.”

“We should get bigger ones, so she can take some home to Eddie,” Lauren added thoughtfully. “Is there anything he would like?”

“The better question is what doesn’t he like,” Tyler teased from the kitchen. He came out, leaning against the doorway with the bowl as he dried it off with a towel after washing it. “We should get a large meat-lovers. I know he likes those.”

“I do too, actually. Especially Chicago style,” I agreed. “Yeah, he’d like that. I am putting money towards this meal, though. You’ve fed me enough lately.”

Three hours later after discussing what time Tyler and Seth would be over to film cooking videos, I came home with a whole pizza’s worth of pie for Edward to have when he got in from work. It was a little after nine in the evening. I got a message just after I put it away. I leaned against the island as I read it. 

“I’m sorry, but filming is going to really late tonight. We’re trying to make up for the missed time. Don’t wait up for me.”

“It’s okay. I’m sorry that you’re going to be working so late. I know you’re tired.” We had stayed up too late in the night, making love. I enjoyed it, but I got to sleep in a lot more than he did. 

“I took a nap in the afternoon after lunch. It could be worse. Sarah says hello and wants to go to dinner with us sometime soon, btw.”

“Sounds great,” I typed back. 

My phone flashed right away in my hand. He mustn’t have been that busy. “Did you have fun today?” 

“I did, but I miss you, and I’m drained,” I answered. I hadn’t done that much, but I had spent the day eating, and it was making me sleepy. 

“I miss you, too. Sorry, back to work now. Get some rest. Love you. Sweet dreams.”

“Okay, love you too. There is pizza in the fridge for you when you get home if you’re hungry.”

“Oh, good. I’ve already eaten that food you packed for me for dinner, but I’m still hungry.” Then he sent a bunch of hearts and pizzas. I giggled a little. “Oh, and Tasha requests the mac and cheese recipe. Okay, going for real this time... Goodnight.”

I made myself a glass of wine and took one of Edward's joints to have by the pool. The weather was beautiful, just starting to get warm. It was going to be hot enough to swim before even Easter. California did have some great weather.  

My phone buzzed once more in my pocket, and I half expected it to be Edward. Maybe he was between takes again, or magically he had gotten off earlier than expected. But it was Jasper, just getting off from work. I answered the call with a smile.  

“So, I’m home alone. Wanna come over and make out?” I teased instead of saying hello. 

"Fuck, yes. I'll be over in twenty to twenty-four hours," he joked back instantly.  

I took a hit, giving a little laugh. “I will buy your ticket right now if you’ll just come,” I said very seriously, softly. 

Jasper sighed. “What’s wrong?”

I clicked my tongue, shaking my head. "Oh, nothing. I just… I miss you. And Edward. And us. I’m stupidly lonely for some reason. I think I don't know how to be by myself anymore. And I'm kind of mad at myself because of it." 

“Neither do I. It’s the worst.”

Biting my bottom lip, I sighed. “Don’t isolate yourself, okay? Go out with your friends more. Go see Edward’s sisters. It makes him feel better. He’s worried about you,” I informed him gently. “It makes me feel better, too.”

He exhaled slowly. “I’ve been better lately. Don’t worry about me, dove. Tell me what you’re doing right now.” He didn’t want to talk about it anymore. 

“I’m outside smoking and drinking all alone. Kind of sad.”

Chuckling, his voice was light. “Oh, then we’re both sad because that’s what I’m doing too.” 

I giggled as I leaned back in my chair, pulling my feet underneath me as I got more comfortable. “I guess that makes me feel a little better. Anyway… I talked about you to someone today.”

“Oh, really?”

“Mmhmm,” I hummed. “Tyler says he likes you.”

“He’s a good bloke. Tony’s found him a pair of first-rate mates, it seems.”

I nodded my head in agreement. Edward was very lucky when it came to friends. "Yeah. I think so, too.”

“I like working with them.” 

“Me too. Even Lauren. That’s Tyler’s wife. She’s about to have a baby, and I'm…” I paused for a second to take a breath. “I'm so fucking jealous," I laughed a little bitterly. " I don’t know why. I shouldn't be. I'm not ready to pop one out yet. And thinking about you or Edward with Ava doesn't help either. I’ve been editing those pictures lately." 

"I got to watch her for a bit,” Jasper said excitedly. “Irina was in a real bind the other day and didn't know who else to call. She's a darling, so I don't mind. She's trying to talk now. Just babbling. It's adorable," he said cheerfully then chuckled. “We went to the park.”  

I smiled to myself, taking another hit. “I know. Edward told me.” I stopped for a moment to think about what we were talking about earlier in the day. “I told Tyler that I think you’d make a good father.”

"Do you really think so?" He asked in a hushed tone. It was almost nervous. I found it very sweet. 

"Without a doubt. I've seen it in person. I think that was my favorite day. When we were all together with the baby at the mall. Even if you were torturing me. Seeing you two on the couch together with her was..." I trailed off and sighed. I took a sip of my wine, tapping my ashes out into the tray.  

“Mine too,” he chuckled for a moment, then there was a little pause. "I'm so scared of being like my father. I don't know if I'd want to even bring children into this world. I wouldn't-” He stopped again. “I wouldn't be sad if it happened. On accident, I mean. But I don't know if it's something that I see myself going after like Tony." 

“What happens when we’re ready for kids?” I questioned a little apprehensively. I knew it was something that we would have to talk about.  

Jasper sighed, thinking about the answer. “The moment you say that you’re ready, Tony is going to do everything in his power to make that happen. And when it does, because he always gets what he wants, you two will be amazing parents. And… well, they’ll have a very loving and protective uncle.”

I looked at the joint in my hand. “I’m scared that it’ll frighten you away,” I admitted to him and maybe myself. “I want you, but I want to have his babies, too. I really do.”

“Dove, I knew that going in. It’s what he wants more than anything, to make a family with you. If I weren’t at least okay with it, he wouldn’t have let this go on for as long as it has.”

“I guess that’s true.”

“I know that you’re not in a rush. We’ll worry about that later.” 

Gazing out at LA, I swallowed back some of my building emotions. “I want you to be a part of that family we make. I want to piece one together with you and Edward. It just felt… right, when we were together. I’ve never been that happy before.”

“Tony is… he is my family already. Not a brother, obviously, but always more than my best friend,” he replied before sighing almost wistfully. “For a long time, I wasn’t able to picture my future. But now… now I see it with you and him. I see,” he chuckled softly, “fantastic Christmases and relaxing summer holidays. Days filled with joy and nights filled with… security and comfort. I see... Home, happiness, hope. And, goddamn, I want those things so badly. So, if Tony and you want kids, I’ll be there for that. I’ll be in the damn delivery room if you want me to be.” 

I laughed. “I don’t even want to be in there for that. I wouldn’t do that to you,” I teased, making him chuckle again. “You know, Edward said last night that you and I needed each other, to distract each other from our thoughts. I think he might be right,” I stated a little more seriously. “I always feel better when I’m talking to you.”  

“Oh, for sure. But let’s not tell him,” he joked sweetly. “He already thinks he’s always right. We need to keep his ego in check.”  

I smiled to myself, taking another a little sip of my wine. “Not too much, not too little?”

“Exactly.”  


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9/27/2019

Episode Ninety-three: Waking up Alone

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Episode Ninety-three: Waking up alone


I had promised Edward in the days before that I would go to the set with him, even if I told him I didn’t want to do it all the time. When I woke up alone, I felt guilty instantly. It was sunny outside, just after ten in the morning. I grimaced, pressing my hand to my face. The brightness hurt my eyes and my soul just a little.

I reached over to the nightstand beside the bed and picked up the cell phone so that I could quickly text him. “Why didn’t you wake me up?” I asked. “I’m sorry. I said I would go with you today. I wanted to.” It made me feel so callus for making him feel like I didn’t want to go. I hadn’t realized what I said.

Edward answered just a moment later. “You were too asleep. I didn’t want to bother you. You don’t have to come.” I frowned at his words. I closed my eyes, angry at myself. 

“I just can’t all day, every day, like I know you’d prefer. I was just grouchy yesterday. This isn’t what I wanted to happen. I’m sorry.” My heart began to speed up in my chest, and I was on the verge of tears again. I hated how much I was crying lately. 

The phone rang just a few seconds later. Shaking just a little, I brought it to my ear. “Would you stop apologizing?” He chuckled warmly instead of saying hello. “I’m not upset. You were just too cute to wake up, and we went to bed so late. Love, it’s fine. I promise. I understand what you meant.”

Trying to calm my overreaction down, I took a deep breath, I let it out through my nose. “I’ll get a car and come up there if you want me to still. I’d like to.” 

"Mm, actually it wouldn't have been a good day to come anyway. It’s boring as fuck right now. We're having some sort of electrical problem. So, I'm in the trailer, goofing around, and playing on my Switch," he explained nonchalantly.  

“Oh,” I said quietly. “What are you playing?” I didn’t know what else to say or ask. 

"It's a building game I just bought, but I don't think I like it. I'm shite at it," he mumbled in annoyance. "I'm probably going to lunch with Sarah in a little while if that's alright." 

I clicked my tongue, shaking my head as I pushed my hair out of my eyes. “You don’t have to ask me. It sounds like fun. I really do like her.”

There were a couple of clicks of silence. “Mm, I just wanna check, you know? It just feels like a good idea. I’ve never gone out without you before. I mean, besides Seth, Tyler, and Lauren and I don’t think they count,” he replied smartly. “And yeah. I like her, too,” he agreed, and then he chuckled for a moment. “She’s already figured me out.”

“What do you mean?”

Edward hummed for a moment. “We were talking about you this morning. She joked about her gaydar and how she was worried about it being off because she thought I was gay the first time we met. Before we even spoke.”

I rolled over onto my side, looking out onto the mountains. Smirking to myself, I stretched my arms out above my head as I got more comfortable. “Oh, Well, you’re not gay, so it’s not as finely tuned as it could be,” I answered. “Did you tell her?”

“No…” He trailed off. There was another pause, this one a little longer. “What am I, though?” 

“Bisexual. Pan, maybe. I don’t know. Maybe queer, like me,” I replied with a small shrug. 

“I don’t know,” he softly spoke. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately.”

I laughed lightly. “I can only imagine.”

He sighed heavily as if it weighed him down. “Why don’t I know? Why did it take so long to even get to this point? There are certainly more things about men that I find attractive lately, but not anyone that I would want to be with besides Jasper. I tried to think if I would want to be with someone who was a different gender than those standard two, and I just don’t know. I can’t think about anybody but you and him. You fill my head and... it’s enough.”

I smiled at his sweetness. “Do you really need a label?” I questioned gently. 

“I like them. They help,” he breathed anxiously. I wished I was with him so that I could have given him some sort of comfort. It made me feel worse for not going with him, even if he said otherwise. 

“So, you’re bi for now. Sexuality is fluid. In two years, you could consider yourself pansexual. Or something else.”

“Why do you like the term queer? It was an insult for so long. It still is to some.”

I had thought about this a million times. “Because I am. I am the definition of queer. There is nothing about me that is just like anyone else. I’ve always been wildly unique, and I don’t want to be like anyone else. I want to be queer,” I stated without hesitation.  

 There was another pause on the other side of the phone. I wished I could see his expression. “You know, I think I want to be, too,” he finally responded. 

“You don’t have to do that. Not for me.”

Edward laughed once. "Don't you think everything you just said applies to me too? There is nothing about me that is like anyone else, Bella. I am unique, and I've never wanted to be like anyone else. I've always just wanted to be me, but I've never known how to be comfortable in my own skin until you showed me how," he said, his voice serious. "Or at least started to. I have a feeling it is a process." 

"Probably." I took in a shaky deep breath. "I guess that's true.” I didn’t know how to help him with his feelings. “Do you think you'll ever come out? To the press or your family?" 

He hummed softly, and I could hear his chair creak as he adjusted in it. "I guess that I've sort of have already to my sisters. They're full of questions, and they're trying to be sneaky about them. I doubt I'll ever tell them the exact details. I don't know." 

“I wish we could come out to them about Jasper at least. I don’t know if it would bother them, really. I think they really love him, too.”

“They actually do. I don’t know. I think Irina would be okay. Tanya, too. I don’t know about Carmen. She’s the most conservative of the bunch. I mean, she’s nothing like my mother.”

“She just wants you to be happy. They all do. Except for your mother,” I clarified quickly. “Carmen would come around.”

“I know. They’re all delighted that he’s moving in with us. The girls have been worried about him. They kept inviting him to things before, and he was declining in the past. But he’s gone to lunch with Tanya and Liam, and he watched Ava for a couple of hours the other day when Irina had an emergency. She took him to dinner to say thank you. Talked to Sasha on the phone.” 

I smiled as I thought about him with the baby. I had a pang of longing. Everyone my age was having children. “I love all the pictures of him with the girls. They all just look at him like he’s magical,” I giggled. 

“Maybe he is,” he mumbled under his breath, making me laugh a little louder. “So, what are you going to do today?”

I shrugged. Honestly, I was a little depressed for reasons I couldn’t fully explain. I didn’t know if I wanted to do anything at all. “I don’t know. There is always more editing to do.”

“Why don’t you go out and do something fun?” Edward countered. 

I flopped down onto my back again. “Like what?”

“Shopping?” He offered right away. I actually barked out a loud laugh. It almost sounded mean. 

“Fun for me. Not fun for you,” I scolded playfully. He laughed a little. “I don’t know,” I repeated. “I haven’t gotten out of bed yet.”

“So jealous. Of the bed. I want you to lay on me instead,” he teased flirtatiously. Then he sighed. “Seems I am being summoned finally. I’ll text you later when I can.”

“Okay. Break a leg and have fun at lunch. I love you.”
​
I laid in bed for a few minutes, just sort of staring up at the ceiling. My cell phone was laying on my chest. I wanted the mattress to swallow me up. When the tiny electronic vibrated, it made me jump. 

It was an unexpected call from Tyler. I wasn’t even positive he had ever talked to me on the phone before, besides on text. “Hello?” I said slowly, a little unsure. I kind of expected him to have accidentally butt-dialed me, and I was about to hear him in the car or something.  

“Hey! I wanted to reach out and let you know that we got the pictures. We love them so much. Lauren cried,” he started right away in a happy rush. It actually surprised me. 

“How unusual,” I teased very lightly as I put my hand on my heart.  

He chuckled. “Thank you so much. I can’t tell you what they mean to us.”

“I’m glad you like them.”

Tyler cleared his throat softly like he was nervous for some reason. "So, I'm all by my lonesome today, and I understand that so are you. I was wondering if I could take you out to lunch to say thank you for the pictures-" 

“You don’t have to do that!” I laughed, almost in embarrassment. It felt like too much. “Lauren bought me breakfast and lunch. Though going out to eat sounds fun. I don’t mind buying my own food.”

“Please! Those pictures would have cost us hundreds if you charged us as you should have. And that was Lauren saying thank you for going shopping and doing her makeup, all that girly shit. I want to say thank you to you in my own way. The better way. With beer and wings.”

I laughed again. “Ooo, beer and wings,” I replied dryly, making him chuckle once more warmly. “Sure, sounds great.”

“Great! Next question. Would you like to make a video with me today?”

I was a little surprised by his offer. “What kind of video?”

“I’m going to do one of my VHS reviews. Old shit that I’ve found at swap meets or whatever, and we rip it apart. I’ll let you pick the movie. I’ve got a whole box. There will be popcorn and snacks. It’s a good time,” he explained. 

I only had to think about it for a minute. He was going to help me with all of my videos, it was only fair that I returned the favor. His was probably much easier, too. “Sounds like fun. I need to get ready. Is one good? Do you want to meet somewhere?” I asked, sitting up in bed as I thought about what I needed to do to get ready. Shower, do my hair and makeup, get dressed… 

“Nah, I’ll pick you up. No need to waste money on an Uber. I’ll see you then. Wings really good?” Tyler inquired just to make sure.

“Mm, yes,” I hummed.  

“Alright, kiddo. See you soon,” he concluded before hanging up. 

After staring at my phone in surprise for a moment, I texted Edward that I was going to spend the day with Tyler and that we would be filming for the channel. He quickly replied, telling me that to have fun and that he couldn’t wait to see what we shot together. 

I hastily got ready, doing my makeup and hair since he wanted to make a video too. It was also probably smart to pack another shirt, just in case the wings were too messy. I wanted to be as professional as possible. 

When he pulled up, I went outside to meet him. Tyler actually hurriedly got out so that he could open the car door for me. He swept his arm out and did a bow as he ushered me inside. 

“Wow, you’re a gentleman,” I praised warmly. 

“Got a set a good example for the kids,” he chuckled once he got back inside. “Gotta get in the habit now.”

“You’re going to be a great father. Really,” I smiled. “Your kids are going to be so lucky to have you. I would have been over the moon to have a fun dad like you.” 

He reached over and squeezed my hand for just a second. “You’re a sweet kid. Please don’t make me cry. Being around Lauren has made me too emotional.”

“I can tell,” I giggled, thinking about his reaction at the beach. “I feel like all the men that I’ve met in the past year would all make really great fathers, actually. You. Seth. Eddie. Jasper. Jake.”

"Yeah. Maybe not Seth," he joked. "I like Jasper," he added, nodding his head in agreement. "I know Eddie is pleased about him coming to Los Angeles. Are you okay with him living with you two?" 

“Yes, I can’t wait for him to come,” I insisted excitedly. “I love him. He’s so wonderful to be around. And I like watching them together. They make each other so happy.”

Tyler nodded thoughtfully. “You know, I like your attitude. Sometimes women in relationships aren’t very supportive of their partner’s friendships, but you’re very cool. You’re like Lauren in that way. She’s always entertained my bromance with Seth, probably more than she should.”

I laughed at his funny words. “Um, well, in a healthy relationship, you just want what’s best for your partner. Part of that is having strong friendships. But I connected with Jasper too, in my own way. He’s my friend now. And he’s miserable in Sydney. It would be better for him to get out of there and better for Edward to be around his best friend.” I paused for a second. “Seth really is a nice guy. I can understand why you value your bromance so much,” I teased a little. He laughed, pulling in front of the restaurant in a parking space. 

“Honestly, it’s the longest and healthiest relationship that I’ve ever had. We’ve known each other for like fifteen years. Anyway,” he chuckled. “So, wanna share something spicy? Unlike your little bitch of a boyfriend, I enjoy the heat.” 

Swatting him hard, I laughed again. “Don’t call your boss a bitch.”

He opened his mouth as if he was shocked. “You’ve called him a bitch!”

“Yeah!” I said as I got out of the car to follow him inside. “He’s not my boss, either. And I haven’t called him one since we started dating.” 

Tyler just chuckled meanly. 

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9/23/2019

Episode Ninety-two: Distractions

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Episode Ninety-two: Distractions


That afternoon when I was alone once more, I worked on the pictures of Lauren and Tyler again. My conversation with Zafrina nagged at me, though. Edward was busy filming, and it seemed like a bad time to whine to him about being so busy making money that he forgets to tell me all the ways that he does. Even if it was annoyingly a big deal. I had made a grand speech on the plane home from Sydney that he didn't have to tell me anything that he didn't want to, and I felt that I had backed myself into a bit of a corner with it as well. I didn't know how to talk to him about it, or if I ever could. And I wasn't going to pout to Jasper either because that felt like a bad idea. I couldn’t run to one boyfriend when I was mad at the other.  

But still, I wanted someone to talk to. So, I decided to call Alice instead. 

"So, my boyfriend made multiple viral Super Bowl commercials, and I didn't know about it," I began right away instead of saying hello.

“What the actual fuck? Really?” I heard clicking in the background. She was by a computer apparently. 

“I’m shocked you didn’t know,” I mumbled. 

Alice scoffed softly. “I only watch the shit you’re in, sweetie,” she answered truthfully. “No offense to him, but I’ve got shit to do.”

I sighed a little to myself as I picked at the end of my shorts. I was sitting outside in the sunshine. If anything, I hoped it would brighten my attitude.

“Huh, that’s wild,” she said almost to herself, obviously distracted by searching for the commercials to watch. 

"I'm annoyed, and I don't know why." 

There was some more clicking and then a slight pause. “Does he inform you if everything he’s working on?” She asked curiously. It was a good question. I thought I knew the answer, but I was wrong.  

"As much as he can,” I replied quietly. “I don’t know. I thought so. But it was around when I was sick, though." I drew my feet underneath me. Just thinking about it made me anxious again.  

"Oh, well, that explains that. He was a mess when you were sick. Eddie had more important things on his mind than funny chips ads," Alice stopped then giggled, obviously watching one of them. "Between that and your new fam, he probably just forgot." 

I bit my thumbnail nail, absently. “That’s a big thing to forget.”

"Does he even care about football?" She questioned next rather unexpectedly. I hadn’t thought about that at all. But surely he understood how big of a deal the Super Bowl was in America. It had to, at least, be explained to him. He had Google like everyone else.  

"Um, no. He's not really a sports guy. I mean, he did wrestling, and he likes surfing. He enjoys running and weighs. But he's not into teams or anything that I've ever noticed. I guess he would have mentioned it if he were," I mumbled in reply, looking out onto the beautiful landscape. "Being Australian, why the fuck would he even care about American football? It's probably just another day at work. And he records so much shit. He probably has loads of stuff that I don't know about yet." 

“Oh, for sure. He didn’t keep it from you on purpose.”

“This compared to Disney? It’s nothing,” I added. 

“Exactly!”

“I know that he didn’t do it on purpose. He would never keep something he felt was important from me. I just feel… sorta, dumb? I guess. I don’t know. I don’t even know who I’m mad at. Me or him, but I don’t think I should be pissed at him.”

Alice hummed quietly for a second. “You were blindsided. That’s all. I don’t think it’s anything to start a fight over,” she agreed. 

"I don't either. I just don't know what my feelings are so that I can discuss them with him rationally.”

“That’s understandable. How did you find out?”

“He's at work right now. I had a meeting with our manager this morning, Zafrina. Alone, for the first time.”

“Oh, I like her name,” she commented offhandedly. 

“Me too,” I replied with a tiny laugh. “You know, it's probably a good thing that I never made it when I was twenty. I'd be a wreck right now. Seriously, one Buzzfeed article that wouldn't pass a sixth-grade journalism class and it was all crazy sweet, and I'm already questioning my sanity. Like… what is this reality? Did I go in the wrong timeline or something?" I demanded as my anxiety grew in my chest, burning. It felt like I was going to have heartburn soon. 

“What?!” She exclaimed loudly, typing loudly again. “You should have started with that! Shit!” There was only a second of clicking. “There you are! On the front page! And it’s trending, too!” My best friend laughed in amusement. “Demetri is going to be so proud!”

I hadn’t even thought about it. Well, that was a positive at least. “You’re right! I need to show him.”

"I’ll send it to him. Oh, my god! You look incredible, though. Wow. Look at you! Those shoes are crazy," she told me as she continued to look at the page. “Aw, Bells!” 

“Those shoes are well over two thousand a pair. They should be praised. Edward insisted on them on when he saw how much I liked them before I noticed the price,” I laughed a little at the memory. “They’re just so pretty and shiny. I turned right into a teenage girl again.” 

“Whoa! Two thousand? Are you fucking serious?”

“Two thousand five hundred, plus, you know, tax,” I clarified. 

Alice seemed stunned for a moment. She loved sneakers and had a fun collection of them. The most she had ever spent was around three hundred, and she felt guilty about that. “That’s so much. Are they comfortable?”

“No,” I scoffed. That was absurd, and she should have known the answer. They were high heels. “I’m going to wear them at least two thousand times though, so I’ll probably get used to them.”

She giggled for a moment. “Wear them around the house while you bake. Out to the grocery store,” she joked. “To get the mail.” 

“Five dollar t-shirt, twenty dollar jeans, two thousand dollar heels, just so that I can go get a pint of ice cream and some tampons.” She snorted at my words. “Maybe sleep in them.”

“Eh, Eddie has the money,” she teased. “If you had to pay for them, you’d be on the corner wearing them.”

I cackled, leaning my head back against the lounger. “I know that’s right. Try to find me a pole somewhere first. They’d be glued to my fucking feet then.” She barked a loud, chortling laugh. “Get them dollar bills, y’all,” I continued snickering. 

“Aw, damn,” she giggled playfully. “I miss you!”

Taking a deep breath, I replied, “me too.” 

It was the first time that I really felt lonely in LA. I was all alone in a home that didn't feel like my own. The main benefit of this anxiety was that I finished the maternity shoot pictures and sent the edited and unedited ones to them to look over. I wrote a short email letting them know if there was anything that they wanted to be done differently, I would be happy to do anything that they liked. I would make their favorites into canvases for them for their party.

It was well after midnight when Edward finally got done shooting for the day. He would have to be back in the morning by seven for another full day of filming. The house felt uncomfortable and too quiet.

I decided to go to bed at around ten, tired of my own brain. I laid with the lights off, but I couldn’t relax or fall asleep without him. He didn’t text that he was on his way home, probably worried he would wake me up. When he got to the house, he quickly undressed and climbed into bed with me so that he could spoon me from behind. He gingerly ran his hand over my shoulder. And then I felt him go rigid behind me. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked instantly. 

I shook my head and whispered back, “nothing.”

"You're as stiff as a board, and you're lying in the dark. Obviously wide awake. Plus, you would have greeted me when I came in if you were in a good mood. So, you're either upset with me, or things with Zafrina really didn't go well." Edward was too smart and observant for his own good.  

“I’m not mad at you.” 

He kissed the back of my shoulder once. “Okay,” he said slowly. “Then what happened with Zafrina? Did she say something to upset you?”

"I'm displeased with myself. That's all. It's nothing to worry about," I countered, but I could hear the pillow shift as he shook his head. "Seriously, don't worry about it." I just wanted to go to sleep now that he was home. 

"No. You're mad at me then. Why?" He pushed. I gave a short laugh and sighed. He was being persistent.  

“I told you that I wasn’t.”

Edward shook his head again. “You haven’t kissed me yet,” he pointed out. I rolled over and looked him in the face in the dark. With both of my hands on his cheeks, I gave him a quick kiss on the lips. His eyes moved over my face. 

“No. Tell me,” he insisted, unsatisfied.

I looked down at his chest, looking at his tattoo. It was beautiful and fresh, the design still perfect since it was new and everything had healed beautifully. My fingers traced over it, taking a breath as I considered my thoughts. 

“I can’t keep up with you,” I admitted in a tiny voice. 

“What do you mean?”

"I can't even keep up with what's going on with your career, and I'm supposed to not only be your girlfriend but be your partner on just one tiny aspect of your work. And just that seems like it will be a full-time job once we get going with all these plans that you have. And I have to learn from Zafrina that you went viral over Super Bowl commercials. That's a big fucking deal." 

He made a little face in confusion. “Okay, so it was a lot of money, but I don’t see why it’s a big deal? I go viral all the time, love. God, that sounds cocky, but you know what I mean.”

I shook my head. This wasn’t even close to the same thing. "They talk about those things for years. And it didn't go nuts with your fans. People who never knew your name before are going to go look you up, just to see what else you've done. You're going to get so much more attention now. Millions, maybe even billions, of people now have heard your voice, and they loved it. You're going to get so much work from it and I just-" I stopped, not knowing how to finish. Panic was building in my chest, my heart thumping too hard.  

“What?”

I shook my head once more, looking away. He pressed his lips to my forehead after he sighed heavily. "I don't know. I don't know why I'm upset." 

“You don’t have to keep up with my stuff. That’s not your job,” Edward answered gently. “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you.”

I pressed my face into his neck for a moment, taking a deep breath. “You don’t have to tell me everything. It just makes me feel like a terrible girlfriend for not keeping up on my own. Especially when you’ve been so wonderful to me with everything that’s been going on with the hospital and my family. But it annoys me that you just couldn’t go, ‘hey, look!’ Just real quick in passing. Like it wasn’t even a conversation, and I don’t know what else I’m missing. And I don’t want to complain either, not when you’re literally killing it out there. What a stupid thing to whine about, because obviously, this isn’t important to you at all.” I closed my eyes as my throat tightened. 

“Okay,” he said again, nodding his head. "It is important. It's just that I do so much other shit. And it was while we were in Sydney, and I didn't want to think about work anymore.” Edward pulled me back so that he could look into my face. “You're not a terrible girlfriend by a long shot."

I shook my head, swallow back my emotions. “No,” was all I could get out. 

“It’s more than just that, isn’t it?”  

“I want you all to myself,” I complained into his skin, feeling like I was blubbering like a child. “I was so lonesome today. And as much as I love you, I don’t want to just watch you work all the time. I do realize that you would love that, but I don’t think I can be that still. I like working and being helpful. And I need to be doing something, too. At least, I need to have an excuse as to why I’m not keeping up with you to some degree because I’ve just been sitting on my ass.”

He quickly grabbed my shoulder. “Stop! You haven’t. Bella, we’ve talked about that already. That’s totally fair. Sweetheart, in New Orleans, when we spoke about you moving in, you said you wouldn’t always put your career ahead of mine. I fully expect and respect that.”

“But I’m not even working right now! I’m just mooching off of you and living in your house.” I began to cry. 

"Bella!" He spoke my name almost angrily. "You have been working, and besides, shit has been going on-" 

I shook my head again quickly. “I can’t keep using that excuse. And what work have I been doing, hm? We’ve barely even filmed anything new-”

“All of your music, all of your pictures. The charity stuff. Meeting today with Zafrina was work. The event was work. Getting prepared for that was work, love. You add new stuff to your store all the time, too. You didn’t charge them, but the photo-shoot was too. What did you do today? Edit? Bella, your life doesn’t come before my career ever. I never expected you to ‘keep up with me’ and I don’t know why you’d want to,” he stated as he brushed my hair behind my ear, soothingly running his fingers over my cheek. 

“Because I love you!”

He laid his forehead on mine. “Yeah! I know! That’s why there is a prepacked lunch for me to take to the set that’s enough for two people with a note that you love me taped to the top in the fridge even though you’re annoyed with me right now,” he answered with a little smile. “I didn’t ask you to even try. Please don’t let this upset you.”

“I was trying to ignore it,” I mumbled. 

“Yeah, don’t do that either. We can talk about anything. At any time. You could have called me and chewed me out if you wanted.”

I laughed. “I wouldn’t have. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Neither did you.” His big hand cupped my cheek. “I’m sorry that you were lonely today.” His thumb moved over my skin lightly as he leaned in to kiss my forehead again. “One of my fears has been that you would hate how much I worked and how often you were by yourself because of it. When Jasper finally agreed to come, that helped relieve it a little. Knowing that he would be here to spend time with you. You could take care of each other. Though, I think you’d be doing most of the nurturing.”

“I shouldn’t need a babysitter, though. I can’t even handle a single day. What is wrong with me?”

“Nothing!” He shook his head. Edward looked away, thinking for a moment. “When was the last time you were completely alone, Bella, for any amount of time?” He asked in curiosity. “More than just a couple of hours. Before this week?”

I had to think about it for a moment. “Washington.”

He shook his head again. “And before then?” He had a point he was trying to walk me to. He really would have been a good therapist. 

“I don’t know,” I admitted softly. “New Orleans, I guess.”

"Exactly. Love, you haven't been alone with your thoughts in months. Washington was emotional, and you had been around tons of people for days, plus you really weren’t alone that long. Christ, think about all that’s happened! New Orleans was the start of this chaos. You were starting to get sick, but you were high on your anti-anxiety medication still. I didn’t realize until much later.”

I snorted quietly. “Yeah.”  

“You hate being alone as much as I do. Admit it.” I shrugged then nodded. “We're the unhappiest when we're left with our own thoughts for too long. So, no, you don't need a babysitter. You need a distraction, or the melancholy will set it. Just like me. That’s why you need Alice and a million tasks to keep you busy." 

“Jasper is more than a distraction,” I breathed. 

Edward nodded in agreement. “Yes, he is. He’s much more, but he can be a million wonderful things at once. And so can you and so can I. It’s not a bad thing.”

“I suppose so.”

“We just want your happiness, just like we know you want ours. It’s okay. It’s not a bad thing,” he repeated. 

I pressed my face to his chest, breathing in his scent deeply. It was delicious. His hand went to the back of my head, rubbing it gently. “Do you want to distract me right now?” 

“Are you trying to use sex to end this conversation?” Edward smirked knowingly when he pulled back to look at me. 

“Yes.”

"Oh, okay. Just checking." He nodded gravely before rolling me over onto my back, straddling my waist. I giggled, smiling with a sigh as his hands roamed across my stomach, over my ribs and over my arms that were stretched over my head. "Next time, call me. Or text me. If you're upset or lonesome, or whatever. Let me distract you because I want to." 

And then Edward did, for probably far longer than he should have.  


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9/20/2019

Episode Ninety-one: #couplegoals

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Episode Ninety-one: #couplegoals


After Edward went to the set in the morning, I couldn’t relax. It was still early in the day, the sun just making the sky purple over the mountains. Laying in our shared bed, I watched as the fiery orb lifted over the horizon. I sipped on a cup of coffee my loving boyfriend had brought me before he went to work, where he was going to pretend to be a vampire for a million dollars. My other boyfriend had sent me a pretty video he shot of the moonlight on the water, while hanging out on the beach, sometime in the night that he filmed while spending time with his friends. 

It was so surreal.

After working out, I showered and edited pictures in the kitchen while I slowly cooked lunch. I decided to do something a little different since I was craving some comfort food. I made spicy sloppy joes in the slow cooker. And I even made the slider buns to have them on. To go with it, I made jalapeno popper mac and cheese with loads of bacon mixed in and a jumbled assortment of lettuce and spinach tossed with avocado and cucumbers in a creamy sweet chili dressing. For dessert, I went for lighter. Angel food cake with homemade strawberry syrup and whipped cream. Mrs. Lettie would have very much approved of my meal choices. Most of the recipes were hers. 

Zafrina arrived precisely on time, well dressed as always. Her tight yellow dress clung to her slender body like a glove, her extra shiny hair straight as a board down her slim back. Bright neon yellow heels that were at least four inches high finished out her outfit. She looked as if she was ready to walk the red carpet herself. 

She hugged me when she came in, kissing my cheeks just lightly. She was at least a foot taller than me.  

“Bella, I want you to know that you’re very quickly becoming my favorite client,” she teased when she sat down at the dinner table with her leather briefcase. 

“Really? Even though Eddie buys you Jimmy Choo’s and Fendi?” I asked cheekily as I passed her the salad bowl. She put a large pile onto her plate, making sure to pick out extra cucumbers that had lots of dressing on them. Zafrina dug to the bottom of the bowl for even more of the dressing. 

She waved me off. “Oh, well… You’re sort of a package deal now. He makes me money and buys me the shoes. You’re going to make me even more money and feed me delicious food,” she answered with a little smirk, giving herself a serving of the cheesy pasta. She didn’t wait to try a bite, humming at the flavor. She put another scoop on her plate, sucking some of the cheese off her finger. 

I giggled softly, taking two slider buns for myself. “I honestly don’t know how I’m going to make you money.”

“Girl, seriously? With all these sponsors?” She made a face at my disbelief. 

“Because of Eddie,” I said with skepticism. “That’s not really me. I’m just his cute little sidekick.” 

She made her own sour face, rolling her eyes. “They want Eddie because of you. You make him even more appealing. Nothing is sexier to a woman than a man who is into commitment,” she insisted before taking a bite so big that it was nearly half the little sandwich after making herself two as well. “Oh, my god. This is so good.” She finished it quickly. 

“Thanks,” I giggled. “I guess that’s true. I’m just not sure I believe it yet, though.” 

“I wouldn’t have signed you otherwise.”

“I suppose,” I mumbled through my own mouthful. “How’s the spice level? I didn’t want to overdo it. I like my crazy hot.”

She gathered a large bite of noodles onto her fork, shoving it into her mouth. “It’s not bad at all. I wouldn’t mind it a little spicier, actually,” she admitted. I had made it just about as spicy as Edward would willingly handle and probably actually like. He definitely enjoyed his food hotter than the average person, but nothing close to me. 

“Me too, actually. Would you like some hot sauce? I’ve started my collection here,” I offered. She beamed at me before nodding. I briskly went to fetch several bottles for her to choose from.  

We sat and ate for a long time, just chatting. I think that she liked that we weren't focused on work. But after dessert, we could no longer ignore the business at hand. Her laptop came out, along with a leather-bound portfolio. It had ‘Eddie Cullen’ in gold lettering to one corner.  

“Sunday could not have gone any better,” Zafrina began as she opened her computer. It quickly came to life, tabs already opened for us to look at. “Between Eddie’s wins and both of your performances on the red carpet, I’m so pleased. I don’t think I’ve ever had someone with such a good first time out,” she spoke proudly, taking out a pen and a pad to take notes with as well. She was ready to work. 

“Um, really?” I questioned in surprise. “What did I do that was so special?” I thought we just talked to people, even then, I didn’t say anything interesting. Edward was the one that handled everything. It was his night.  

Zafrina sort of rolled her eyes. “Well, you two are on a lot best dress lists for the night. E!, Entertainment Tonight, Extra. Buzzfeed has you as their best-dressed couple of the night for the show.” 

She showed me each of the other articles first before she moved onto the BuzzFeed list. Then she brought up another that they just posted that morning on their website. It was titled, ‘Best-dressed, best voice, best life. Eddie Cullen and his new girlfriend are total #couplegoals’. It was short with a lot of pictures. I skimmed it quickly. It had my face over and over again.  

"I don't know if you know this, but Eddie Cullen, actor, voice actor, writer, YouTube star, and overall hottie, has a new sexy girlfriend." There was a picture of Edward alone walking a red carpet and then another of us at New Years at the party before going inside. "This lucky girl is Bella Swan, photographer, chef, and rising internet personality who just happens to be equally as smoking hot. Don't believe us. We have photographic evidence." There were a couple of stills from me on the channel. They were of me cooking in the kitchen with either steam or smoke around me. They were actually pretty good pictures. 

"Sunday night, they walked their first red carpet event as a couple at the Children's Choice Awards, and they have officially become my new #celebritycoupleobbession. Why you may ask? (Besides the fact that they are extra in love and it is super cute?)" There was a picture of us brushing our foreheads against each other and then a gif of him thanking me at the awards and me smiling up at him. "It's simple, really. It's because, besides being #couplegoals, they're also #fashiongoals. Classic, classy, and just look at those shoes!" Several pictures of us were scattered throughout with little blurbs about each, one of them was a close up of my red bedazzled Jimmy Choo heels. "Sigh. We would be totally jealous of Bella if we didn't want to be her BFF. We can't wait to see what the pair wears on the red carpet next!" The final still picture was of Edward looking down at me with a big smile on his face, his eyes focused on mine. I was beaming back at him, his arm around my waist and holding me close to his side. 

"Want to see the darling duo in action? Check out their ever-growing video library of enchanting content on Eddie's channel. Their food videos are some of our favorites in the Tasty office." There was a gif of us in the kitchen, him eating while I was laughing at the mess he was making. It was from one that we filmed around New Years. There were a bunch of links down at the bottom.  

“Holy shit…” I drew out thickly, sitting back in my seat with my mouth wide open. My head went completely empty for a moment. 

Zafrina sort of wiggled her shoulders as she leaned forward, obviously very proud. “Between this and all the attention that he’s getting for the super bowl commercials-”

“Pardon me?” I interrupted her. I didn’t mean to be rude, it just surprised me. “Super Bowl commercial?” This was the first I heard about it. 

“Yeah, he did the voice-over for several Lay’s commercials for the Super Bowl. They’ve been doing fantastically. They all went viral last month. You didn’t know?” She asked in astonishment. 

"No," I breathed out as I shook my head. "But the past few months have been hectic." 

Zafrina looked as if she instantly understood. “Mm,” she hummed as she took a sip of her lemony ice tea. “I think they aired around the time you went into the hospital. I talked to him about them while you there, I think. He wasn’t much in a chatting mood, though.”

“Oh, well, that makes sense,” I said quietly at that added detail. It did help a tiny bit, but I still felt more than a little left out of the loop. Was I really so out of touch with my own boyfriend’s career? Or pop culture in general? I just felt incredibly obtuse.   

"He wasn't allowed to say anything about it until after they aired," she continued, seeing that I was rather upset at the news. Clearly, she didn’t want to get her client in trouble. "Honestly, I don't think that he cares about any of his commercial work. Eddie said he had a meeting with Lay’s the other day and almost fell asleep during. He just did it for the money, truthfully.”

I nodded absently. “Sounds about right.” 

“You know, he got paid just over a hundred thousand for the four! Literally, a day's worth of work in a box." She shook her head a little to herself like she couldn't understand how that was even possible. Neither could I. A typical ad was around thirty seconds, meaning he got paid hundreds of dollars per second to just speak. I was going to have to watch all of those commercials. “He doesn’t care one bit.”   

I laughed a little at the absurdity of it all. "Probably not. And he does so much other stuff. I know he does tons of commercials that I haven’t watched either. I just feel stupid for not knowing, though. But I don't know the last time I turned on the television and watched a regular show. I've been so isolated lately," I admitted to her in a tiny voice. Even with my friend visiting and spending time with Lauren and Tyler. It wasn’t the same. "And I feel like I can't keep up with everything he does.”.  

"Don't even try," she chuckled lightly. "It takes me and a couple of others a lot of work to even attempt it, and he's always coming up with more ideas and tasks for us. That man is a machine." 

I bit my bottom lip at her wording. She wasn’t wrong about that. “Yeah, he is.”

Zafrina looked me over slowly, considering me for a long minute. Then she pointed one of her fingers at my chest. “You hate this stuff, just like him, huh? He acts like it’s monotonous and he doesn’t care, but it’s actually that it makes him insanely anxious. The way they speak about him, his appearance. He can’t control it.”

Thinking about it for a moment, I glanced up at her. “He was a husky boy growing up, and I think he was bullied and teased because of it. It’s why he has an actor’s mask in the first place. I can imagine people talking about his appearance, even if it’s overall mostly nice, still feels like that.”

“I can see that,” she nodded thoughtfully.

I shrugged. “He’s probably smart for avoiding it.”

“He’s doing well enough on his own, for now. Hm, well, I don’t think you were a chubby child. I don’t think that’s why you dislike it,” she said slyly. I shook my head with a slight smile. “I don’t see this becoming a regular thing with us,” she continued with a small grin, trying to be comforting. 

“Mm, no. Probably not,” I replied a bit timidly. “If that’s okay.” 

"Of course, it is! In the future, there might be things we have to go over, but I will let you know. I'll keep an eye on the media and just keep you two pointed in the right direction. Right now, though, I don't see any problems in the immediate future. Oh," Zafrina paused for a minute as she remembered something. "I wanted to let you know that you've gotten a couple more sponsorship offers. Eddie said that he wanted to wait to go over them all until he's done with his movie. Would you like to go over them before then?" 

I was a little stunned for a minute. I was already surprised by the ones we had received. “Oh! Um.” I shook my head in answer swiftly. “There’s no reason for you to go over it twice because I won’t make any decisions without him on those kinds of matters, anyway. It’s going to be us together in those. Makes more sense.”

“Okay, just checking. Honestly, I wouldn’t doubt we see more coming very soon anyway.” She put the leather folder back into her briefcase. Then she started to make herself another slider from the leftovers still on the table. She had tried each of the different hot sauces I brought out. “I want you to know that I’m going to find any excuse that I can to have as many meal meetings as possible, though.”

I giggled softly, nodding my head again. "That's fine. I enjoy cooking, and Eddie is going to be happy with the leftovers. I can send them to the set with him tomorrow with a bottle of Tums."   

“Ha,” she threw her head back with a little laugh. Taking another bite, she quickly wiped her mouth. “That boy needs to get himself a good supply because you’ve got some very interesting hot sauce deals.”

I barked out my own laugh. “Really?”

“Mmhmm,” she mumbled through her bite. “They want you to do some rating videos, some cooking videos. Maybe a challenge video with the boys. That sort of thing. Some of Eddie’s favorite things to film.”

“Yes, it is.”

She smirked a little. “They loved it when you wiped the floor with him. You’ll definitely need to do it again soon.”  


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9/16/2019

Episode Ninety: Important Calls

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Episode Ninety: Important Calls


Lauren, Tyler, and I stayed until it was well after dark, taking photos where the streetlight would allow us as we walked back to their car. We were having a lot of fun. I was really pleased with how everything turned out. I was excited to start working on editing the pictures right away. 

They dropped me off back at the house, which was still dark as well. Edward wasn't home yet from shooting. I punched in the keycode and made my way inside. I hated it being so quiet. I missed him throughout the day. Especially as I saw the loving couple look at each other with literal tears in their eyes.  

My phone rang just a moment after I stepped foot into the foyer. I moved towards the kitchen as I answered, walking to the fridge to get myself a glass of wine to drink while I edited. The call was from my brother. 

“Hello,” I said too brightly, already smiling. I was always excited to talk to him and hadn’t been expecting to do so that night. At least on the phone. We were having constant text conversations.

He chuckled at my tone. “Hey there, sis. How are you doing?”

“I am good,” I replied as I pulled out a nice white from the fridge. “Great, actually. I just got back from taking pictures for a friend,” I explained. 

Jacob made an ‘interested’ little noise in the back of his throat. “Cool! Just for fun?”

“Yeah, it’s for a party they’re having soon.” 

“Nice. So, what are you doing now? I’m not bothering you, am I?” He worriedly asked. Usually, we let each other know in a message when the other was calling. I was talking to my siblings almost entirely through chat, which actually made it easier. There was no rush to answer, and no one was put off when someone didn’t respond for ages. We were all busy people.  

"Oh, no. Not at all." I shook my head even though he couldn't see me. "I'm just waiting for Eddie to get done filming for today. I don't know when he will be, though. I literally just walked into the house.”

“Late night.”

“Yeah,” I agreed. “I've been out pretty much all day, and I'm kind of tired. So hopefully, Edward won't be too long because I'm ready for bed. What about you?" 

“Chilling outside with a smoke. Ness went to visit her mom for a few days, so I’m all alone and fending for myself,” he responded, sighing softly. “So, bored as fuck. What kind of pictures were you taking?” He continued. I giggled softly. “What kind of party?”

“Gender reveal. It was a maternity shoot. So, good practice for whenever I do Vanessa’s. We need to figure out when y’all want me to come up to do that,” I said with a little smile. I couldn’t wait to see them again. I loved talking to Jake so much. There was a connection there that I couldn’t explain, but it felt right. And nice. I adored having a brother. 

“Baby, whenever you want to come will be great. We’ll make time for you,” he swore very quickly. “You aren’t too busy though, are you? I would get it if you were.”

I scoffed, shaking my head again as I played with the bottle of wine. “For this? No, never. I want to come back already anyway. I… I didn’t get enough time, my last visit. I was too much in shock before. I’m finally feeling back to normal now, though,” I admitted to him, feeling a little sad. I shook it away. “How far along is she, exactly? I shouldn’t wait too long.”

My brother thought for a second. “Six months and three weeks.”

“So, in the next six or seven weeks sometime would be the best. I’ll probably have to come on my own this time, though,” I concluded softly as I thought about everything that was coming up in the next few months. “Eddie is so busy right now. But I want to see the girls again when I’m there. And our grandfather, too.”

He laughed a little bit. “He likes you. He respects how strong-willed you are. Gramps says you have the spirit of a real Quileute. You were born a wolf.”

“Oh,” I sort of whimpered, putting my hand over mouth to keep from squeaking. I was determined not to cry over every little thing. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he answered warmly. 

“My grandpa likes me,” I croaked, rubbing my hand over my cheek. “Aw.” I didn’t know what else to say.

Jake chuckled for a moment. “Yeah, and it’s fucking amazing because he hates everyone pretty much.” I laughed at his words. They didn’t surprise me at all. He seemed to be that kind of man. “He loves you, Bella. We all do.”

Tears stung my eyes, my nose stuffing up a little. “I love you, too,” I closed them as I breathed out the words. My phone beeped at me, interrupting the conversation and my emotional moment. “Ah, I think Eddie might be calling me.”

“I’ll let you go then,” he replied in a pout. “Have a good night!” He added more cheerfully. My brother seemed to, in general, be an optimistic person. 

"Alright, you too. Don’t get too bored. I'll text you later. I'll look at when I can come up, and we'll make plans," I promised quickly.  

“Sounds great. Bye, sis,” Jake answered jovially before hanging up. 

I swiftly switched over the call to the other line, sniffling loudly into the speaker. It was the remains of my almost tears. I was glad that I didn’t. My crying at the beach had been cathartic enough, and I didn’t need my face to be any puffier. 

“Hello?”

“Bella, what’s wrong?” Edward started, instantaneous worriedly. 

"Nothing," I laughed a little watery. Clearing my throat, I swallowed back my emotions. I continued to play with the bottle of wine, never actually making myself a glass. "I was just talking to Jake, and he said something really nice. Don't worry. I'm fine, honey. Good tears. It's been a pleasant day." 

“Oh,” he sighed in relief. “Oh, good. I shouldn’t have panicked that quickly. Crickey. I’m sorry.”

I giggled as I rubbed the heel of my palm against my eye. “It’s okay. I understand. I probably would, too.”

He chuckled. “Um, anyway, should I pick up something for dinner or do you want to go out?” He knew I had been out all day. We had frozen stuff, but I wasn’t sure how much effort I really wanted to put in.  

“Let’s just order dinner. I want to spend the rest of the night in your arms, editing. On the couch. Or the bed.”

Edward hummed loudly in pleasure at the idea. “Mm, sounds perfect. I have a script that I need to read.”

“Okay,” I responded as I looked at the bottle of wine again. “I’ll see you in a few minutes. Love you.”

“I love you too,” he reciprocated promptly, making me smile. 

I decided to skip the drink until he got home and get a shower instead. I was feeling sandy from the beach, and I didn't want to bring it into the bed with me. The tiny grains were in my hair and stuck between my toes, somehow finding its way into my shoes and socks. 

After laying out my nightgown for the evening, I warmed up the shower while I brushed my hair. I used a cleaning wipe to scrub away the remains of the light makeup that I had worn for the day. There were bright purple circles under my eyes. I hadn’t realized how tired I really was.  

The suds from my shampoo were just beginning to free themselves from my curls when the shower door opened. Edward slipped in behind me, pressing a kiss to the back of my shoulder. He pushed my hair to one side, massaging his fingers into it to help get the soap out. 

“I have missed you all day,” he sighed heavily, pulling my warm wet body to his much cooler one. It was a pleasant difference. 

Leaning my head back against his pec, I glanced back at him. “Bad day?”  

“No,” he shook his head and sighed again. “I just want to be terribly selfish and beg you to come to the set with me every day, but I don’t want you to be bored.”

“It’s not that boring, but I can’t tomorrow. I have a lunch meeting with Zafrina. Maybe later this week I can come back if you want me to,” I explained. “The day after I could. I don’t have anything planned, and I can work on my pictures some while I’m there.”   

"What sort of meeting?" He asked in curiosity. Edward switched spots with me so that I could put the conditioner in my hair out of the direct streams. The remains of his white makeup ran down his chest in little rivers, his eyes smudged black. I would have to help him clean it off better.    

"We're going to talk about the press coverage of the award show, apparently," I answered as I moved the cream through the ends of my hair with my palms. He finally began to wash his own.   

Edward made a little face. “Oh, the boring stuff.”

“I don’t know why she would want to talk to me about it,” I admitted, leaning back against the shower wall. I hadn’t seen anything about the event. But I had been busy with too many other things. Not that I watched television at all or sought out magazines to read. I just took the pictures for them. I wasn’t even on social media that much, if ever. I hadn’t been on since Sunday night before the awards, at least. 

He chuckled softly. "I do," he commented, reclining his head in the water so that it slid down his delicious back. "It's just her thing. She'd do it after everything with me if I let her. I don't think it's necessary, though. It's all very dull and tedious. And a waste of time. And I don’t give a flying fuck what other people say about me anyway." 

“She wants to talk to me about what kind of role she’s going to play. I don’t know what that’s going to be.”

Sweetly, he smiled as he ran his hand down my arm to mine so that he could hold it for a moment. “Don’t worry about that. It’s all trial and error.”

I nodded. “I know.” I squeezed his fingers in return, looking down at them as I did. “When we started dating, I didn’t realize this was even a possibility.” I looked up at him slowly. “I don’t know what I’m doing.” 

“Well, we’ll figure it out together,” he promised. “I’ll help every step of the way.”

“I know,” I repeated.  

After our shower, we dressed and ordered dinner. I worked on the bed on the new pictures. I was on my laptop between Edward's legs while he rested against the headboard and read a script for a movie he was possibly going to audition for. He wasn't sure yet. He had already read two others during the day between filming in his boredom. 

We were comfortable for five minutes when he got a phone call. I was rather hoping it was just the delivery driver calling for a code or something, but I wasn’t that lucky.  

Edward sighed heavily. “It’s a business thing. I’m going to take this in the office,” he mumbled, getting out of our snug cuddling position. I pouted a little bit as I watched him leave. 

Only a second later, my phone rang too. I smiled to myself when I heard the tune. It was the same song that played on Jasper’s phone for his morning alarm.  

“Hi, honey,” I said brightly, just happy to talk to him again. 

“Hello, dove,” he began in a deep warm voice. “How are you?”

I decided to rest against the headboard to get more comfortable. “Good. Tired. I had a nice day out taking pictures like a real photographer. What about you?”

Softly, he hummed. "Better now that I can hear your lovely voice. Is Tony still filming?" He curiously asked.

“He just got home a little while ago, but he’s on a call right now. We’re waiting for dinner,” I informed him with a small sigh in my voice.

“You okay?” 

Shaking my head to myself, I replied, “Oh yeah. I’m just exhausted, and I got so spoiled to having you both in Sydney. I miss all the attention,” I admitted. “I’m feeling a little lonely.” 

“Me too,” he quietly confessed.

“Don’t worry. We’re going to spoil you soon.”

"Oh, are you?" He said a little more lightly.  

Hugging the blanket to my stomach, I closed my eyes to take in his voice. “Yup,” I grinned. “When you get here, I want to spend a week in bed with both of you. With tons of kisses and lots of naked snuggling.”

“I can’t wait,” Edward exclaimed as he came into the room. Jasper spoke at the exact time on the other side. I laughed, biting my bottom lip. A little blush spread over my cheeks.  

“Neither can I,” I answered them both. I put the phone on speaker as Edward crawled in behind me again. He put his chin on my shoulder as he put his arm around my waist. I wiggled my ass against him, snuggling into place.  

“Hello, love,” he started in an overly cheerful voice against my exposed skin. “I miss you terribly. I want you to come to watch me on set with Bella. Please blow shit off and come here.” 

Jasper laughed at his blunt and playful attitude. “You don’t always get what you want!”

“Yeah, I do,” he muttered in return. I snorted to myself. “Bella’s bored on set. Come keep her company while I’m shooting. Do it for her.”

He gasped. “You’re a son of a bitch. That’s dirty.”

“Yeah,” our boyfriend snickered. “Come for her.”

“That’s what she said,” I laughed under my breath. Edward jokingly slapped my bare thigh, making me giggle. “I do want you to come. Come for me. For both of us,” I added as dirty as possible. I could feel him laughing silently against my back, his face in my hair. “Oh, god. That tickles,” I giggled again. “But no, really.”

“We can’t have this conversation every time,” Jasper sighed. 

“Um, yeah. We can until we get our way,” I argued sarcastically. 

“Geez, you are just like him!” He laughed. 

“Yeah! I know! It’s part of the reason you like me,” I answered back slyly.

“You are annoyingly cute. Both of you. Stop it.”

“Never!” I laughed as Edward squeezed my stomach.  

The doorbell rang. 

"Dinner!" Edward popped up off the bed. I giggled at his great mood at just talking to both of us. I couldn't wait to see how he was going to be once we were all actually together. It was hard to imagine being happier than I was.  

“Alright,” Jasper laughed again as well. “I guess I’ll let you go eat then. Sweet dreams, my darlings.”

“Okay. Text me later, okay? I miss you.”

“Of course,” he replied. “I miss you, too.” 

Only a second after we hung up, he sent me a message filled with a mixture of different colored hearts and flowers. I grinned to myself as I walked to the dining room table where Edward was starting to pull out our meal. He had already brought out the bottle of wine I played with earlier, two big glasses waiting for us.    


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9/13/2019

Episode Eighty-Nine: Maternity Shoot

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Episode Eighty-Nine: Maternity Shoot


“Oh, my god! Thank you so much for this!” Lauren gushed the day after I went to the movie studio with Edward. She hugged me tightly, pressing me to her big round belly. We were meeting for breakfast and spending the entire day together. We were going to go shopping for clothes for her maternity shoot that I would be doing that evening with her and Tyler. After, we would go get our hair and nails done to prepare. She asked me to do her makeup. 

I squeezed her back, happy to be with a friend. "You're very welcome! It's been so long since I've shot anything like this. I'm actually excited for once because it's someone I like!" I joked. 

She was just about to hit the six-month mark, and her belly was already heavily curved. Almost impressively so. We were doing the photos for her gender reveal party that they were having soon. I would be taking more once they got closer to the due date, and at the party as well. It was my gift to them. And, of course, I was going to take some of the baby once it arrived.  

We sat so that we could order our meal. It was the first time that we had been alone in this way, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. She sipped her orange juice, smiling brightly as she relaxed in the sunshine. We had a spot on a patio table in the middle of sunny Beverly Hills. It was the perfect spring day. 

“You look content,” I smiled. 

Beaming, she raised her face up towards the sun to soak more of it in. "I am. I really am. I feel like everything is perfect. I have a wonderful husband who has a great job, and we have a sweet little house that's just right for three. Everything is exactly how I always dreamed it would be," she replied, rubbing her hand over her bump. “I am so ready for this.”   

“So, do you know the sex?” I asked with a jesting smirk. 

She quickly shook her head. “No,” Lauren giggled then rolled her eyes with a sigh. “I can’t be trusted with secrets. Tyler knows and is planning everything, though. I haven’t even seen an ultrasound yet. He’s having a lot of fun being in charge. He doesn’t have any tells!”

“I bet he’s fun to play poker with,” I quipped. She rolled her eyes again more dramatically and shook her head. 

It was her turn to smirk. “He’s got terrible luck actually, so it wouldn’t matter.” 

I giggled. “Aw, me too. So anyway, I thought we should probably get you at least a couple of outfits. Do you still want to do it at the beach?” 

We had discussed it some in texts over the past few days. She only had vague ideas and wanted me to take control. That’s why I was coming along. She wanted everything to be perfect for the pictures. Edward had bragged about how good I was at Ava’s photos and how I color-coordinated her outfit. Lauren wanted me to do the exact same for her.

Quickly nodding, she took another sip of juice. “Yeah.”

"Okay. So, I thought we could do a bathing suit shoot-" 

Lauren gasped as she flushed. “Really?”. 

I laughed at her instant reaction. “Yeah, you’re super cute right now. You need to show off that baby belly. I’m thinking bikini, something neutral. Purple or lavender would be perfect. A big floppy hat. Glasses.”

“It sounds fun! I just don’t know if I’m brave enough for a bikini,” she admitted as her blush deepened. 

“You’re gorgeous!” I assured her quickly. I wasn’t lying to make her feel better, either. She was actually glowing with her happiness. It showed on her face and especially her constant bright smile. I could only hope I was as happy when I got pregnant one day. She was handling it so much better than some of my friends had. It looked as if she was made for this.  

She shook her head once more. “I’m fat!” Lauren laughed awkwardly, covering her cheeks with her hands before sighing. “I don’t know. We’ll see about the bikini, but I like everything else. We’ll get some broad shorts for Tyler. Thank you for coming. I’m kind of fashionless.”

“You’re welcome. Don’t worry! We’ll find the right one for you. You’ll see. And the dress for the sunset pictures, too. Everything is going to be perfect.” I was going to try my best to make it that way for her. 

“I’m so excited for today,” she professed, looking down at her stomach. “It’s been so long since I’ve had a fun girl’s shopping day.”

"Me too," I replied back honestly with a little sigh. It had been a long time since I had done anything out at all with a female friend. Demetri was fun, but he was intense in his shopping. I didn’t think Lauren would be like that. I thought about all the women I wanted to go out with in the future. "I told my sisters when they come to visit, we'll have to shop on Rodeo Drive together. I keep trying to think about a future where all my sisters and sisters-in-law are all together in one place, but I can't. It's so many people." 

Lauren giggled softly, taking another sip of her juice. "It's funny that you're thinking about Eddie's sisters as your sister-in-law already," she pointed out to me with a smirk. 

I flushed a little. I hadn’t realized what I said, but she was right. I had meant them, too. “It’s just a matter of time, I suppose. I like them so much. We’ve been texting in a big group chat, without Eddie,” I confessed quietly. “Just small talk mainly. I see where he got a lot of his best and worst traits from. I think he might actually be the quietest one.”

She looked at me in disbelief. I just nodded my head, making her snort softly. “Tyler said they were nice when he met them. He told me that they were all alike, too.”

"They are! They make the same faces. His grandparents, too! It's crazy! I already know what our children's side-eye is going to look like." She snorted again loudly at my words. "Our kid is going to come out with bright red hair, green eyes, and shouting ‘oi,'" I continued. She threw her head back in laughter. "And it'll swim before it walks. I swear the little ones are part fish."  

“Aw! Little Aussie Mermaids!” She cooed teasingly. “Maybe you will have a baby with one green eye and one blue, and it’ll be just slightly tan,” Lauren continued to muse. 

“With freckles,” I added. “And curly hair. His is too as it gets longer.”

“Your babies are going to be so pretty,” she sighed grinningly. 

The very thought was overwhelming. “Eddie is so ready for them,” I breathed, placing my chin on my palm. “And, I am too, almost, but it’s been less than six months. You should probably be together longer than nine months before you get knocked up on purpose.”

 “Probably,” she giggled. “I’m surprised he wants them already.”

I bit my lip for a moment. “Me too,” I admitted. “He’s so ready to be committed. He loves the very idea of it. Edward sees what his sisters have and…” I sighed a little bit as I trailed off. ”He just wants a house full of little girls, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to give him that.”

“Why not?” She asked quickly, surprised. 

Taking a deep breath, I decided to share one of my biggest fears. “I don’t know if I can even get pregnant,” I declared, shaking my head sadly. When I was younger, I was grateful for my seemingly endless mistakes to not have resulted in a child. I wasn’t mentally ready. I still wasn’t, but I was closer than I had ever been before. “I really don’t think that I can. I keep joking about my IUD with Eddie, but I probably don’t even need it.”

She made a little face, obviously not knowing what to say then sighed before waving off the sadness. “Eh, he’d be fine with adopting,” she replied brightly. 

Lauren was right, of course. I knew that. I nodded my head and smiled at her words. “Yeah, he would. I just want those red-haired babies, too. I want to give him a child that has his crooked smile and brilliant mind and watch him mold them into thoughtful and caring little humans.”

“You will. Don’t worry.” She reached for my hand and gently gave it a pat. “Don’t worry! You’ve got time. You’re both young.”

I nodded, but I didn’t feel it. “You’re right. We do,” I agreed as I picked up my coffee and took a long sip. Our waiter arrived a moment later with our food. I was happy there was something else to talk about.  

First, we went to Target. I went to it far too often, and I knew far too many of the employees’ faces for my liking. I talked my friend into buying a ruffly light lavender two-piece with a matching skirt. We also got all the accessories for a beach scene. A blanket, towels, picnic basket, umbrella, a big black floppy hat, bug-eyed glasses, and even swim toys. They all had an ice cream theme to them. The swim trunks she bought for her husband had a mixture of popsicles and ice cream cones decorating them. She even bought him a hat and sunglasses as well. Lauren really got into the spirit once we got started.  

We went to a nicer mall to get the right dress. It took a little longer to find the perfect off the shoulder navy blue maxi that dragged the ground. It was covered in hot pink roses, its skirt loose-fitting and comfortable. She had to try several, much to her dismay. She was having trouble getting them over her belly.  

Once we were done, we had lunch at the mall because Lauren was hungry again. I would deny her nothing. It was her day. She could eat as much and as often as she wanted. I wasn’t ravenous though, so I simply had a small strawberry and spinach salad with a glass of iced tea. She had a salad, a full meal made up of a variety of several side dishes, and a piece of vegan chocolate cake. 

Next was our trip to the salon. We were having our hair and nails done while we were there. She was having her short blond curls styled in a twenty’s style as well. I didn't really need my haircut, so I just got a nice blowout. I had it done just the week before with Demetri. It was still fun to be pampered. 

While I was getting a pedicure, I received a text from Zafrina. I never had before. For some reason, I began to panic. “Hi! I was hoping I would be able to touch base with you soon to discuss the media coverage of the award show.”

The anxiety prickled at the base of my neck. “Is everything okay?”

“Everything is fantastic!” She answered back quickly. “I know Eddie doesn’t care about any of this stuff, but I figured you might be interested. We should discuss what kind of role you would like me to play anyway with this sort of thing. When would be a good time for you?”

I felt instantly relieved. It was probably silly to become alarmed in the first place. I was sure if there was a real problem that she would have called me. We really hadn’t talked that much. I had let Edward take care of everything because I knew that he knew what he was doing.

“I have a photoshoot today. I’m free anytime tomorrow. If you would like, we can make it another breakfast meeting,” I replied.

“Damn. I have a breakfast meeting already. Lunch?”

It made me feel even better to know I would have something to keep me busy in the morning. “Perfect. Any requests?”

“Surprise me. Though I do enjoy spicy food.”

I smiled to myself. “I can do that.”

“I’ll have my secretary text you later with a good time. I’m in the car right now driving. See you then, Bella.”. 

Closing my eyes, I laid my head back in the chair as they continued to paint my toes matte blue, willing my nervous heart to slow down. 

"All done!" Lauren chirped when she popped out of her chair, about an hour later. "Girl, you look good!"  

“Aw, thank you.” I shook my hair out playfully with a smile to show it off while I batted my eyelashes. “Come on. Let's go get your makeup done and make you even more beautiful before Tyler gets home. We’re kind of cutting it close.”

We were, but thankfully, her husband was late. He was out filming with Seth all morning for the channel. They were working on their own stuff, and soon enough they would be helping me while Edward was busy on set. I wasn't sure how I would do without him. Seth and Tyler were going to take turns being in videos with me, so at least I wasn't alone.  

The beach wasn’t too far from their house, so we still got there in plenty of time to take pictures in the sunshine on the sand of them together before sundown. Some were sweet, others playfully. They looked so blissfully happy together. But I was most excited about the golden hour, the magical time at sunset with the perfect light. 

Lauren went off to get changed in her pretty dress and to freshen up the makeup that I had done for her with a new coat of lipstick in a different shade. It had been purple to go with her swimsuit, but we had gotten a bright pink to match the roses on the dress. She also took off her hat, which we had pinned to her hair with care as well so that it wouldn’t fly away in the wind. It still looked perfect.  

When Tyler saw her, it was hard to describe his expression. A thousand emotions went through his eyes at once. He had changed much more quickly into nicer slacks and a button-down, and we were waiting for her together. His chest swelled, and he smiled as he watched her walk towards him from the changing rooms. The wind whipped her dress around her as her bare feet crunching in the sand. She grinned back at him, holding the bottom of her skirt as she hurried towards us. 

Surprisingly, he began to cry.  

And I caught it all on film. 

I had never seen him so emotional before. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathed, covering his mouth with his big hand. His eyes all but disappeared as he sobbed softly. 

“Don’t do that!” She laughed then sniffled loudly to keep in her tears. “Don’t make me cry! I’ll ruin my makeup! Bella worked so hard on it!” 
Tyler shook his head, trying to get it under control. “I can’t help it! I’m just so lucky,” he said as he took her hand in one of his and touched her belly with the other. “I love you all so much.”

She looked up at him adoringly, her eyes glistening. "We love you, too," she promised. Then they kissed. No one else in the world mattered to them at that moment. No one else existed. Not even me. 

I might have cried a little too as I took hundreds of photos. 



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9/9/2019

Episode Eighty-eight: Hunter's Moon

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Episode Eighty-Eight: Hunter's Moon


In the morning, I made us a quick breakfast before we went together in the car the studio had provided for him. We quietly sat in the backseat, his head on my shoulder as we held hands. The driver, a young woman, opened the door for us when we arrived at the lot. 

Most of the movie was being filmed on a large sound stage. Edward had a small trailer just outside of it, a few more all in a row around his. There were two people, a makeup artist and a stylist, waiting for us just beside the camper at a picnic table. 

"Good morning, Eddie," one of them, a tall, pretty black woman, said right away when she noticed. She stood up with a big smile. The other, a short, stocky young man, looked over tiredly as he sipped his giant coffee. He was clearly not a morning person.  

"Good morning. Tasha and Joe, this is Bella, my girlfriend. She's coming to watch me today," he explained with a big smile as he opened the trailer with his key. He allowed them to go up the steps first before letting me. When I got inside, Tasha brought me into a hug.  

“So nice to meet you! We just love working with Eddie!” She gushed. 

“It’s nice to meet you, too! He is easy to work with, huh?” I winked at him when I looked back over my shoulder. He chuckled, scooting past me in the small space to go sit in his chair to start his process. 

“He is probably one of the most pleasant celebrities that I’ve worked with.”

“Wow. All this because I bought you pizza for lunch yesterday? You’re easy,” he teased, throwing off his hoodie and stretching his arms above his head. “See? This is why I buy people things.” 

"I am easy, but you're still nice," she giggled as she started to pull out her supplies while Joe helped. I sat at the dinner table that was across from them, pressed against the other side of the wall. "Oh, and you also gave me some of your breakfast, too." 

“Bella made all of that,” he sang my praises with a big smile. “I am so spoiled.”

“Good!” I laughed. “That’s exactly the kind of spoiled that I want you to be. Stay this grateful, though. It only encourages me to cook more.”

"So, how long have you two been together? You seem like an adorable couple," she asked as she started to put a stark white foundation on his face.  

It took them an hour to get him ready, and we chatted the entire time. I really enjoyed talking to Tasha. She could have held the conversation all on her own, but it was fun to keep up the constant pleasant chatter. When they were done, they left to go help someone else, but he still had another thirty minutes before he was needed on set.  

Edward was dressed in a nice tight-fitting black suit with a crisp white shirt but no tie. His hair was perfectly trimmed and combed into place. His skin was snow-white, his eyes edged in purple and dark blue. He even had the fangs. Somehow he didn’t slur when he had them. 

“How do I look?” He questioned. 

"You look like we need to go find a nice private place, so we roleplay out some of my long-running fantasies," I stated flirtatiously.  

Edward raised an eyebrow in my direction. “Oh, really? ‘Vampire’ does it for you?”

I giggled. "Obviously. Wanna come over here and bite me?" I pulled gently on the lapel of his expensive jacket.  

"Mm, yes, I do. But we shouldn't mess up all that hard work they just finished. Tonight?" He answered in a teasing voice. "Why don't we go get some coffee real quick instead, so I’m not tempted?" 

“K.” I bounced up from my spot at the table and took his hand. He smiled at my silly enthusiasm. 

There was a commissary in the next building over from the sound stage, so we walked the short distance outside in the pleasant California sun. There was a little bit of a line.  

“Why don’t you go sit down, love? I’ll fetch this for us,” he offered when he saw me yawn widely. 

"Thank you," I mumbled as I leaned my head against his shoulder for a brief moment. 

There was a small round table to one corner by the exit door that was empty. I decided to take up residence there to people watch for a few minutes. There were somewhat familiar faces, but I wasn't sure of anyone's name.  

"Hi!" A small woman in her early twenties, maybe, said from the table beside me. She was wearing blue jeans and a t-shirt with a comfortable looking bright yellow hoodie jacket. She was as short as me, but her skin was an even lighter olive tone, and her hair was straight and blue-black. "It's fun to watch, right?" 

I quickly nodded in agreement. “Totally. I am terrible with names, though. I don’t know anyone. I do know some faces, though.”

“Well, I’m Sarah!” She grinned as she introduced herself. “I know a lot of them, but I don’t know your face. What’s your name?”

“Bella,” I smiled back pleasantly. “This is my first time in one of these things.”

She nodded in understanding in return. “Oh, makes sense. You get used to it,” she promised. “So, what are you working on?” 

“Oh, I’m just visiting the set. The one they’re filming just right over here, actually. Um, Hunter’s Moon.”

Sarah instantly got excited. “Aw! Awesome! Actually, I’m working on that movie, too. You know, if you wanted… I could, you know, give you a special private tour and then maybe afterward we could get some lunch?” She asked, smiling at me as she looked me over slowly. The pretty young woman was checking me out. 

“Oh, my!” I laughed as I instantly blushed. “Like a date?” I blurted out, almost embarrassed. She nodded again with her friendly smile.  

“Oh, no. Did my gaydar go off at the wrong time?” She inquired cutely with a scrunched up nose. 

“No. It’s not wrong,” I giggled at the way she phrased it. “I am queer. Um, it’s just that I’m actually visiting my partner on set. He’s in the movie. I’m sorry. That’s really flattering, though. Thank you.”

She didn’t seem too disappointed. "Aw, that makes sense! You're gorgeous, and you seem sweet." 

I clicked my tongue, blushing brighter at her compliment. "Thanks. I don't know about that. But you are."  

Her phone beeped in her hand, and she looked at it quickly. "Oops, time for me to get on set. I hope that I didn't make you uncomfortable." 

"No, not at all! You are a beautiful young woman, and it always feels nice when someone so lovely flirts with you," I admitted quietly.  

She put both of her hands on her chest, blushing a little herself. “Aw, thank you! See, I could tell you were sweet. Well, maybe I’ll see you later.”
“Have a good day,” I called to her as she left. I kind of laughed to myself. A couple of minutes later Edward came to me with our coffee. I stood and took it from his hand. “So, I totally just got hit on.”

He wasn’t impressed. “Um, are you surprised?”

“Uh, yeah? She was like twenty and super hot.”

“Oh?” He said, his voice getting a little more high pitched. “You should have led with the ‘she’ part. That makes it more interesting.”

“I think that she was an infant was more interesting. I’m a million years old.”

Edward ignored my comment. “Did she say her name?”

“Sarah. That’s it, though. We only talked for a couple of minutes.”

“Is she still here?” He questioned, peaking around him before we walked out the door to go to the studio. He would be needed there soon. 

“No,” I laughed. “She had to get to the set.”

“Huh. Wonder if she’s an actress.”

“She didn’t say if she was or not. It didn’t seem like it to me. She wasn’t dressed up or anything. But she was an embryo, seriously.”

He took a sip of his coffee before shrugging. “She could just be baby-faced like you?” 

“No. She was definitely under twenty-five. I’m pretty sure that’s my hard limit on ages. No more than ten years. And I think my dating calendar might already be full,” I teased. “I think two is enough for me. Thanks.” 

My boyfriend snorted. “Please, you could wear six people out,” he said under his breath. I gave him a look, making him chuckle to himself. “I’m just calling you energetic. It’s not an insult. And I’m not saying you should. It’s just entertaining to see you so flustered.” He just smirked when I stuck my tongue out at him. He was doing it on purpose. 

We came onto the set, Edward leading the way while I still held his hand. We went to a quiet corner where there were mirrors and makeup chairs for touch-ups. They were in between scenes.  

I expected there to be a lot more action than there was. But it was a lot of just sitting around, waiting, makeup touch-ups, scene adjustments, camera, and light readjustment too. After a while, I brought out my tablet, a Christmas gift from Alice that I actually rarely used, so that I could work on my charity research. It was perfect for this purpose, though.  

Edward was filming scenes by himself for most of the morning, and I wasn't sure how he could be so funny all on his own. He knew every line perfectly. Whenever the director would want him to do it a different way, he could change on a dime. It was impressive. He was a far better actor than I had ever actually seen in person before, so close up anyway. I had gone to a few Broadway shows, but I could see him shining on that stage as well.  

After a few hours, they finally called cut for lunch. Apparently, two different crews were shooting on opposite sides of the big soundstage, and they started a break at the same time because a bunch of people went for the exit all at once. Edward was taking off his shirt and jacket so that it wouldn't get dirty while we ate.  

"So, what do you think we should order? We have a couple of hours if you'd rather go to lunch?" He offered as he hung them back up on a rack. There were several backups, just in case. Just then, the girl in the yellow hoodie walked by. We smiled at each other, and she looked over at Eddie.  

"Oh, that's your partner?!" She shouted in surprise. I laughed, covering my mouth as I nodded. "Hi, Eddie!" 

Edward whipped around to look at us, his eyes wide. Then he started to laugh, pointing between her and me with a grin. "Oh, I didn't even put two and two together. Sarah. Of course. Um. Yeah, so… Bella. This is Emma Sarah Jones, my co-star." 

"But my friends call me Sarah," she explained to me brightly. It's something they had it common, that they went by their middle names normally. I could tell by the way he looked at her that he liked her. "Oh, my gosh! He was talking about you all day yesterday. ‘My girl this and my girl that.’ It was so sweet. I can see why you turned me down," she lightheartedly teased. "I'm sorry that I was trying to pick up your girlfriend." 

“I get it.” He winked at me. “She’s a masterpiece. I can’t fault you your taste.”

“Oh, my. Eddie’s going to lunch today,” I mumbled to myself jokingly as I hopped down from his makeup chair finally. 

“What does that mean?” She asked in curiosity. 

My boyfriend answered for me. “She means she’d like quiet Edward to come back so that we can have a pleasant meal because she’s sick of watching Eddie already.”

I lifted my chin in the air, comically offended. “I’m not sick of him. You just need to save that energy for work. You don’t have to be a show-off all the time.” 

He scoffed. “Um, yeah? I do.”  

“You know what? Your grandmother was right about you. You are a fulltime job,” I responded dryly. 

"Um, yeah?” He repeated playfully. “Wasn't that basically the conversation we had last night?" He deadpanned before pulling me surprisingly to his side and kissing me deeply on the lips. They were going to have to fix his makeup after eating anyway. "Mm, I've wanted to do that for hours," he said to himself as he pulled away. 

“Kissing is an extra twenty dollars,” I smirked up at him in a challenging way. “Time is money. And what were you saying? You don’t give your skills away for free?”

“Twenty? That’s it? I’ll take a thousand more,” he replied before kissing me all over my face until I dissolved into giggles in his arms. He laughed at our playfulness, pushing his face into my neck for a moment to breath in my scent. “You should charge more, darling.”

I heard a soft giggle. “Oh, god. Too cute,” Sarah stated sweetly. I had forgotten she was even there. I was so wrapped up in my own little world of Edward. “He was actually explaining the term ‘pre-fiance’ to me at lunch yesterday.”

“No!” I laughed in embarrassment, “Edward, you’re telling people about that?”

He quickly nodded his head. “Um, well… just her. And Tasha. And a couple of other people.” I pouted a little. “Oh, come on! I like the term. It makes me happy. I’m sorry,” he chuckled before looking at her. “Thanks for outing me.” 

"Whoops," she giggled unapologetically. "Anyway, would you two like to join me for lunch? I was thinking about hitting a food truck down the street. It's Vietnamese. It's right by a small park, so we can sit out there while we eat." 

I looked up at Edward, who smiled down at me. I glanced in her direction. "Sure. Sounds fun." 

And it was. A lot. I loved talking to Sarah. By the time we had finished eating our meal and walked over to another food truck to get some dessert, we were entirely holding up the conversation. 

Apparently, she had been a child star and was on a television show that ran for six seasons that I had never even heard of. She had also been in more movies than Edward. She had come out at eighteen and had been an advocate for equal rights ever since. She was only twenty-two. I didn’t have the heart to tell her my age. She was so full of happy energy, chattering away with me. 

When we got back to the lot, we separated to go to their trailers so they could get freshened up. They were going to filming together that afternoon on a different set that I hadn’t seen yet. They were right beside each other. 

“I feel like I just chaperoned the cutest high school date ever,” Edward taunted in an American valley girl accent as soon as we got inside. I laughed and shoved him. “O.m.g. Totes adorable.” 

“Shut up!” I laughed, pushing him again. He was trying to make me flustered once more. “She’s too young for me! I’d never date her even if I were single. She’s just an infant! A gorgeous one, but still.”

He grabbed me up in his arms. "I think you made a new friend, though." 

“I think you have too, actually.”

“I hope so.” He squeezed me and kissed the top of my head. “She seems like a genuine person. I like her. It would be nice to have a friend in Hollywood.”

“She seems like our kind of people,” I replied. He nodded in agreement. 

Tasha and Joe knocked on the door, coming to finish getting him ready. He gave me one last long kiss before sitting back down in his chair. 

“You have a piece of rice on your shirt,” Joe laughed, picking it off and flicking it into the trash can. 

“And that’s why I took my costume off to eat,” he said back in fake indignation. 

They filmed for a lot longer this time. Several hours in a row with only short breaks. There was still a lot of quiet sitting around, though. By the time we got to the car around ten that night, I was ready to show Edward the work that I had done during the day on my tablet.  

“So,” I began as I pulled it out the device, his head on my shoulder. “Here is my research that I’ve put together for your charity of the month. I have three possible choices for each. Here are the details on each foundation and why I would like to use them that particular month. I made sure every one of them had a good track record. I also made sure to pick some more obscure ones. You don’t want to just focus on the mainstream nonprofits. I have the bat sanctuary as my top choice for October.” I grinned. “But all of this is in our file now. So, whenever you’re ready for it…” 

“Wow. That was so much quicker than I thought you’d be able to do it. And far more detailed.”

“It wasn’t hard.” 

Edward took my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Thank you. I can't wait to see what you have for me. See, this is why your time is worth so much! You accomplished more on a tablet while sitting around being bored for an afternoon than most people can in a week." 

“I’ve been working on it a little, on and off, for a couple of weeks now,” I admitted. 

He sighed very quietly then he glanced over at me, brushing his fingers over my chin. “Yeah, I know. But you’ve been a very busy girl today. Bella, love- I…” Edward paused, squeezing my hand again. “I just want you to know that I see your worth and I want you to know how much I appreciate all that you do. And I want you to see your value, too. And not just to me.”              


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9/6/2019

Episode Eighty-seven: Trust me

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Episode Eighty-seven: Trust me


It was late that night when Jasper called me again, but Edward still wasn't back from set yet. I spent most of that time cooking, cleaning, and working. I prepped some dinners for later and made him some frozen burritos to have whenever he wanted them. It wasn't enough to keep my mind busy, though. 

“Hi. How are you?” I asked Jasper worriedly. 

"Mm," he hummed quietly. "I don't know, really. Weird. Unhappy and frustrated. I did just watch Tony accept his awards again, though. So that helps." 

I brought my thumb up to my mouth, chewing on it for a second. “Wasn’t he sweet?” I insisted with a little smile. It was quiet on the other end for a long minute. 

“He said that he loved me. Out loud. To the world, Bella,” he stated, his voice almost flat. “He said that he loves both of us.”

“Are you really surprised?”

“Yes,” he laughed anxiously. “Do you really think he does?”

I didn’t have to think about it. “Of course.” I shook my head, playing with the edge of my shorts as I spoke to him. “I know he does.”

“That’s not how I meant,” he replied quietly. 

I sighed. “I know what you think that I mean. But he does. He is very much in love with you and has been for a very long time. He might not be ready for it yet. To admit it. It’s probably scary and a lot. This… this type of relationship is hard when it’s just for fun. Love is overwhelming, and you see how passionate he is.”

Jasper let out a long breath. “I wish it were easier. How does that make you feel? He’s your-”

I had to stop him right away. “He’s ours. Jasper, I want it to be all of us, together. I know it started as Eddie and Bella, but it also began with Tony and Jasper. And, you know, if anything… I’m the intruder in this relationship. You two needed me to open your eyes. But now they are.”

“Please don’t think that I want to replace you. I don’t. I swear to you-” he declared very quickly, clearly upset. 

“I know!” I laughed sadly then sighed. “I really do. I promise. You two are just so good together. But he and I are great together, too.”

“I think we’re superb together, too. You and me. And altogether,” he replied sweetly. 

"So do I. So, I know that it must be frustrating to feel like the third wheel, but you're not to me. Or to him either. You're an amazing man, and I am so glad that you have been my friend in the past month. Your comfort means so much to me." 

Jasper paused, and I could almost see his pretty smile in his tone. “Me too, dove. I mean it. And if I can’t be anything else, I want to, at least, be a good friend to you. Always.”

“You know you’re on the top of that list now, right? It’s a good one, too,” I teased. “It’s very prestigious.” 

He chuckled warmly before saying in a soft voice, "it's an honor to be on it at all. By the way, tell Tony thanks for the cookies, yeah? They were very thoughtful."  

“I will,” I promised. 

"I don't know what I did to deserve you both, but I feel fortunate right now. I am spoiled in a way I don't think I have been before. And I want you to know that I am going to give you the biggest kiss when I see you next." 

I could only smile as I imagined it. “Mm, you better. You owe us both lots of kisses right now,” I teased again. My phone beeped loudly in my ear. “Mm, it seems like Tony is calling. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

"Okay. Kiss him goodnight for me." 

"I will," I swore before I switched calls. "Hello there, handsome."  

“Mm, hello beautiful. Do I need to stop for anything on the way home?” He asked wearily. Edward was obviously exhausted from his long day and from not being able to sleep. So was I, and I knew I didn’t do nearly as much as he did. 

“No. I’m just ready to have you in my arms again.”

He sighed in relief at my answer. “Perfect. That’s exactly what I need, too.”     

We went straight into our bed almost as soon as Edward finished eating his second bowl of soup. He was drained from his long day and depressed from Jasper’s canceled vacation time. He brought a handful of cookies with him, laying against the headboard as he pouted a little bit. 

"I bet it was easy to be a moody, sarcastic vampire today," I said lightly as I laid my head on his shoulder and smiled up at him slightly. He offered me a bite of the shortbread before kissing away some of the chocolate from my cheek, wiping the rest off with his thumb.  

He nodded a little. "Ah, yes. I mastered brooding today for sure," he chuckled quietly. "Can I ask you something?" Edward questioned a little more seriously.  

“You already know the answer to that.”

“Why is giving you or him money such a big deal? I don’t understand. I have all that I could ever want. Seriously. I’m a good businessman, and I swear to you that we will all be very well taken care of for the rest of our lives… So will our kids. Our grandchildren and great-grandchildren if I do it right. If you two just let me. I want you both to just let me,” he ranted. I let him fizzle himself out. 

I sighed, thinking about my answer. “I know you do. I just don’t want to take anything I don’t deserve, though. Neither does Jasper.”

“But he does! You do too! I wouldn’t be giving it away without reason,” he stated in frustration.

Laughing, I looked away. "I don't deserve money just for dating you, honey. I love you, but that's not how that works." 

Edward quickly shook my head, displeased with my answer. “Today, I know you cooked several meals worth of food. I know you cleaned, too. People get paid to do that.”

“I live here. I’m eating it, too. People don’t get paid for feeding themselves.”

“Sweetheart, when are you going to understand that time is money? The more skills and talent you have, the more your time is worth. Your time is worth a whole fucking lot. I already pay someone to clean this place. I could pay someone to cook for us if you wanted, too. Or we could order food more. Or get a service. You could easily pimp yourself as a personal chef and make at least a hundred thousand a year. Or open your own restaurant. You have skills that are worth paying for because I see your value. And those aren’t even the things you can do for the channel. Jasper has different skills that have value to me that I am also willing to pay for. Any money that I have ever spent on you or him, gifts or otherwise, has already come back to me tenfold at least. I’m not stupid. This is an investment in our future happiness and stability.”

“I understand Jasper more than me, to be honest. For the channel at least.”

He made a face. "Even with getting signed? And after giving me access to all of your music and pictures? Do you know how many I have already used? At least a dozen bits of your songs in different things, and it's like you have the perfect thumbnail already for everything. Videos you did not star in, but you will make money off of as well because you put work into them." 

“And I’m almost ready to give you my charity research,” I informed him softly. 

Edward took a bite of his shortbread cookie and chewed for a moment, leaning his temple on the top of my head. “You don’t have to rush. I have charities lined up already for the next three months. I know that kind of research is tedious.”

"I know, but it's not hard, and I'm actually pretty good at it. I understand how nonprofits work." 

Nodding a little, he smiled proudly. “I know you are. You’re good at anything you put your mind to,” he asserted warmly. He took another bite, slowly nibbling at it before he sighed. “Bella, does he not really want to come?”

"He does," I promised. "Trust me. Jasper does so badly he's seriously considering wounding his pride to do so, but what would you do to not become your mother? The person she is?" 

“Anything, but accepting help won’t make him his father. He could never be that kind of man.”

I shrugged. "And all we can do is keep reassuring him of that, but it doesn't come easy. Jasper feels like he's failing at taking care of even just himself when in reality, he's a victim of his situation. He’s just stubborn and proud." 

“Like you?” 

Sighing, I shrugged once more. "I would have gotten myself out of my hole without you eventually. I was already close. Just a few thousand to pay off the last of our credit card debt. But the security that came from it…" I trailed off. "I don't know what I'm saying. I can just understand his hesitation, but I get your frustration because I want to help him, too." 

Edward chuckled to himself for a moment. “He doesn’t know what to do with himself when you offer him money like that. He’s touched by the gesture but so horrified by the idea of it at the same time. He’s used to me. I don’t think he was ready for your level of generosity, though. You would give your last cent to help.” 

"Well, like you said… any money I spend is going to come back to me tenfold. It just might not be in the form of cash. It might be companionship, friendship, or affection. I want my friend out of a miserable situation, and I know we can make him happier." 

He nodded for a second slowly, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, we can.” Edward grinned cheerfully, pulling back to look at me for a moment. “I know all of this is weird and different, but… that’s one of the reasons I was attracted to you in the first place. You’re a little weird and different, like me. Like him. I felt like we just fit together when we were in Sydney. In our own strange way.”

“It did,” I agreed. I let out a little light breath of my own. “I never thought when I jokingly told him that he could kiss you if he got a chance, but that I wanted to watch, that it would actually happen. Or that you would like it.”

I could see a blush rising on his cheeks. "I had been fantasizing about it for a while, but I didn't realize that I was going to like it that much." He finished his last cookie, putting it into his mouth whole. Edward swallowed before he spoke again. "I keep thinking about the things I want him to do to me now. And to him. The things I want to do with the three of us together. My mind is constantly in the gutter." 

“Ooo... Like?” I asked with a big smile. He flushed a brighter red, making me giggle. “Tell me.”

He sighed, looking away as he continued to be embarrassed. “I want you both to play with my ass. I love it when you touch and grab it. I want…”  He trailed off. 

“You want…?”

“I want to do everything,” he finally looked at me when he spoke. Edward shrugged. “I don’t know how else to say it. I loved fucking him. And he deserves to feel that, too. I’m terrified for the first time, though.”

I nodded. I could certainly understand why that might have scared him. Neither of them was small. I had been nervous as well. “We could start slowly with fingers and toys.”

“I’ve liked what we’ve done so far. I know we haven’t done much, but… Yeah, that’s what I was kind of hoping for. And maybe we could get a strap on? Before he comes,” he averted his eyes when he said the last couple of sentences.    

I laughed, nodding my head vigorously. “Yay.” 

“If you don’t want to-” he began quickly. 

"Oh, baby, do I want to. I'm about to say something that is very unlike me… I have always wanted a really good strap-on but wasn't willing to spend too much on experimenting. It might be a good idea to get a few of them to try out." 

His smile grew so wide. “Bella tries strap-ons? Wow, these rating videos are insane.” I snorted at his answer. 

“And if you don’t like it… Well, I can fuck Jasper with them. I know he’ll enjoy it,” I replied. “So, it won’t be a waste either way.” 

“Oh, fuck,” he whispered to himself. “I didn’t even think about that. That is so hot. You could take him from behind while I fuck his mouth.” 

I giggled softly, leaning over to lightly kiss his ear. “You’re assuming I’m going to be good at it.”

"I'm just assuming that my sexy partners will put on a good show like they always do and I really want to watch his face as he begs for it. Besides, hopefully, we'll have loads of time to practice." 

Gently, I traced my fingers down the bend of his arm, still playing with his ear. “Oh, you think I’ll make him beg for it?” I asked in a sultry voice. 

“Mm, yes. I do.” 

I moved onto my knees so that I could look at him with a smirk. “Think you’ll beg for it? Because I’d like to see that, too.”

He laughed, blushing as he looked up a little to the ceiling. “I can’t believe a difference a year makes. Boring prude to begging my tiny girlfriend to fuck my ass... Yes, I probably will.” 

“You weren’t a prude,” I giggled in return. “You were just… not as experienced as Jasper and me. Though, I’m starting to wonder if you two trained together on the same secret sex monk mountain.” 

Edward threw his head back in a big laugh. He raised an eyebrow in my direction. “Oh, does his oral skills match mine?”

Sitting back on my heels, I leaned my head back and forth. “You’re still the best. But…” I trailed off. Jasper gave him a good run for his money, and he knew it. “That man gives much better head than me. Just saying…”

“Honey, it’s like trying to say ice cream is better than cookies when they’re both spectacular, just different.”

“And some people like ice cream sandwiches,” I joked. 

He nodded once earnestly. “Goddamn right. Why pick if I don’t have to? We don’t have to. We can choose this.”

“Is it really possible for us to have it all? Aren’t we asking too much of the universe at this point?” I asked curiously. I could feel my anxiety start to build in the back of my mind. Too much good was happening, even with the canceled PTO. I was terrified it was going to be taken away in an instant. 

“The universe doesn’t give you a thing, Bella. You have to take it or work for it. Or beg.” He grinned at his words, rubbing his finger under my chin for a second. “I’m never going to stop demanding more. For me. For us. For you and Jasper.”

Quickly leaning forward again for a hug, I pressed my face into his neck. “Good,” I mumbled against his skin. 

“Ready for bed?” He rubbed my back gently. I nodded slowly, not moving my face. “Yeah, me too. I got the alarm set for six. Do you still want to go to the set tomorrow?” I just nodded my head once more in response to his question. “Yay,” he breathed before pressing a kiss on the top of my head. Edward reached over and flicked off the lamp before sinking into the bed beside me. We adjusted until we were completely wrapped in each other’s embrace.  


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9/2/2019

Episode Eighty-six: A shave and A haircut

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Episode Eighty-Six: A Shave and a Haircut


Edward's alarm clock song. 


I woke up with a jolt in the middle of the night, and I knew that I was alone. Rubbing my face, I took a deep breath before I looked around. I expected to have to go find Edward in his office again, but I saw him right away in the bathroom. It was only lit by the vanity lights. He was staring at his face in the mirror.  

Slowly, I sat up to watch him. After only a few seconds, he turned to look in my direction. It was just a glance, but he quickly realized I was looking back at him.  

“I’m sorry. Let me turn this off. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

I quickly shook my head. “No. It’s okay. What are you doing?”

“I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t want to smoke. I thought I’d shave, but…” he trailed off. Edward looked back into the mirror anxiously. 

“Would you like some help?” I offered. He nodded slowly and smiled at me. 

I crawled out of bed and started to gather the supplies that I would need to help him. When I had everything ready, I picked up the clippers in one hand. With the other, I ran my fingers over his chin lovingly. “I’m going to miss it. It feels so good when you kiss me.”

“I’m going to miss it, too,” Edward admitted. “It makes me look older.”

"Why would you want to look older?" I asked, shaking my head. "It is very dashing, I have to admit. Especially with how well-groomed you've kept it. You're already a mature man, though. Most of the time," I teased. “You don’t need to look older.”   

“I just want to be what you need.”

Glancing back, I looked at our shared reflection in the glass. “Mm, you don’t need a sexy beard for that, sweetheart. But don’t worry. Hair grows back.” I tugged on his chin gently then leaned down and kissed his lips deeply for a moment. “Ready?” 

He put both hands on my waist, looking up at me with a little smile. “Yup.”  

I started at his jaw, exposing the soft white skin underneath. Of course, I had to see what he looked like with a goatee. 

I took a picture with Jasper and titled it, ‘evil Edward.’ 

And then I carefully did a mustache. I shook my head and scrunched up my nose with a laugh. “Oh, no. That’s like a seventies porn stash. That’s terrible.”

Jasper definitely got a picture of that as well. Edward was having fun taking stupid selfies with me in the mirror at three in the morning. He sent the text, “hahaha your mustache is stupid.” 

“Bella agrees,” he answered back with a laugh before he put the phone down. 

Once the mustache was gone, I lathered his face with shaving cream. 

“I like how you take care of me like this,” he declared in a little voice as I began to shave him with the kit that I had bought for his birthday. It was finally going to get some real use. 

“I like it, too,” I admitted. “But it’s only fair. You take such wonderful care of me.”

He smiled a little bashfully at my words. "So, tomorrow, you'll come to watch me make a fool of myself?" 

“You’re not going to make a fool of yourself! Stop it. You are going to make me laugh though because you are a funny actor and I enjoy watching you work. And I am really excited to see you do your craft in a new way.” 
 
Sighed heavily, he looked up at me almost timidly for a moment. "You always know just what to say to make me feel better. I'm so glad you woke up," he breathed out softly. 

Eddie of the night before was gone, and my sweet apprehensive Edward was looking up at me worriedly. I wanted to take it all away.  

“Whenever you feel anxious, wake me. I am here for you. If you need me, I’m always here. No matter when. I will do whatever I can to make you feel better,” I swore as I dragged the razor delicately over his skin. 

“Thank you.”

I played with his hair for a moment with my other hand. “Don’t. You don’t have to. It’s what you do for someone you love.” I smoothed a piece away from his forehead. It was long and floppy because they were going to cut and style it in a few hours. 

When I finished shaving his face, we got into the shower together so he could wash all the stray hairs away. Once we got out, I smoothed my nice skin creams all over his fresh face. Moisturizer, my favorite rosewater spray, a serum for brightening his skin. They were all very lightly and naturally scented and were perfect for him. 

His eyes rolled up into the back of his head as I smoothed it over his cheeks. “Would it be terrible if I started using this stuff every day? That feels lovely.”

“No. We should just buy bigger ones. They’re kind of expensive, though. I splurged since, you know, people want to take my picture now for some reason,” I explained jokingly.  

He chuckled. “I don’t think the cost will be a problem. Next time you pick some up, use the card. All your beauty stuff is a work expense now. Your wardrobe, too.”

I thought about arguing with him, but he was right. It was a work expense. He was the smart one when it came to these things, so it was probably just best to listen to him until I knew well enough. "Okay," I answered. I rubbed my thumb over his temple. "It does make your skin really soft." 

Out of nowhere, he scooped me up into a passionate kiss and held me tight to his body. His skin was warm and supple under my lips. When I finally needed air, I pulled away from his mouth to peck along his jaw. 

“Does it still feel good when I kiss you without the beard?”

“God, yes,” I whimpered as his lips moved down my neck. “Edward, make love to me. Please?”

And that’s what he did until the sun started coming up as his alarm went off. The phone sang to us as we finished with soft touches and kisses. For a long moment, we laid there with our foreheads touching as we listened to it. “You know I talk too much. Honey, come put your lips on mine and shut me up…” 

“Today is going to be a great day,” I promised vehemently. “You’re going to own it. And tomorrow will be even better.”

"Every day with you is better than the last," he replied, slowly pulling away from me. "But you're right. It's going to be a fantastic day, and I am going to fucking own it," Eddie said confidently. And like that, he was back, but just for a moment.  

“Yes, you are. Now, would you like a breakfast burrito before you go to work?”

“Aw, yeah. That sounds perfect. Thank you,” he smiled at me innocently. 

I packed him a couple of extra and some fruit salad in a little Tupperware, giving him a large travel mug of coffee on his way out to the driver that was waiting for him. The studio was doing it for all of its stars in the movie. They wanted to make sure everyone showed up right on time, safely. 

“The very best part of today is going to be coming home to you tonight,” he vowed with a kiss.  

I leaned my forehead against his chest for a minute, smiling to myself as we stood in the kitchen before he left. “I’m going to make soup for dinner. So, it’ll be ready whenever you get here. Would you like me to make you something for dessert?” I grinned up at him sweetly, enjoying feeling like the doting wife for the moment. 

“Mm, cookies? But I’d love whatever you make me,” he replied as he kissed my forehead lightly. 

“How about some shortbread?” 

“Mm, yes. I’d love that.” He smiled, swatting my ass playfully with another kiss on the cheek before finally going out to the car. 

That morning I went to the grocery store to pick up things we would need for the week before coming home to start dinner and chocolate-dipped shortbread cookies. While they baked, I worked on pictures and updated my store with new photos. A lot of them were from Australia or La Push. Most of them were abstract, but those seemed to be doing the best. My nature photos were a close second.  

It was just after two in the afternoon when I got a call from Jasper. It was very much unexpected. The last I had texted him was the silly pictures in the night. He should have just been getting to work. This was not to tell me that I was something out of his dreams, though. 

“Hey,” I said quickly, already feeling anxious. I knew something was wrong. 

“Hi,” he sort of sniffled. “I’m sorry to bother you-” 

“You will never be bothering me. What’s wrong?” 

He cleared his throat, the sound thick and unpleasant. “They- The station canceled my time off. Uh, someone quit and-” 

"No!" I whined. "Fuck them! Jasper! Just… just fuck them! Come here. They're screwing you. You work your ass off for them, and they treat you like garbage." 

Jasper coughed, and I could hear him suck in another breath. “No. It’s- It’s probably better because I need the money-”

“Why?” I demanded.

There was a slight pause. “I need to pay off some loans before I go to LA. I’ve only got a couple more payments.”

“What were they for?”

“Bella-”

I didn’t like not knowing. “Please, tell me. This is a subject that bothers you, and I want to know why. Why did you need the loans? Let me help.”

He sighed, taking another needed pause to decide if he was going to actually tell me. “I needed it to bail out my dad. He’s,” he laughed humorlessly, “a real piece of shit. I’ve been better about not giving him anything, but, fuck! It’s put me in a real hole for a long time. Everything I make goes to these fucking bills because I just want to be done. And I hate it. I fucking hate him for it. I have nothing saved up. I’m just constantly almost drowning.”

I knew exactly how he felt. After Aiden died, I saw the debt he put us in with credit cards, and until I finally paid them off, I felt like I was drowning too. It wasn't until I met Edward that I had any sense of security.  

“How much more do you owe?” I asked quietly. 

“Three thousand.”

Well, it could have been a lot more. It was bad enough, but I could still help him with no problems. I didn’t even need to look at my money. “Damn. Okay. Well… let me take care of the last payments-”

"Absolutely fucking not!" 

“Why?”

“He will not get your money.”

"No, you will. And you'll pay me back whenever you can. Not that you'll need to," I countered. I didn't care if I got it back. It would be worth it.  

"No. No, no," he kind of whimpered, and I knew he was crying. "Fuck. I don't want another cent of Tony's money or yours to go to him. He's already gotten too much as it is. No. This is the smart thing. I'll get a fat check at the end. And that will help me-" 

I cut him off. "Oh, god. Literally, money means nothing to our boyfriend. You know that, right? It's just paper to him now. He could wipe his ass with twenties if he wanted to." He laughed softly. "Seriously, though." 

“Dating him and taking his money is so much worse.”

Suddenly, I felt as if I was going to cry, too. It had been building, but I held it back. “Don’t let your pride keep you away from us. I know you’re scared about how everything is going to work out, but don’t use this as an excuse. Let us help you because we care for you.”

Jasper clicked his tongue. “We’ve barely dated a month… I mean, Bella, it’s amazing, but I would never take your money.”

My eyes stung. “I trust you.”

“I know you do.”

“Don’t you trust me?” I asked in return. 

“Oh, dove. Yes. Yes, I do. I probably trust you more than I’ve ever trusted anyone before. Even Tony.” His answer was so quick that I knew it was the truth. 

I held back my tears, my throat was tight as I swallowed. “Then trust me now and let me help you. Let me do these things for you because… now I can. And I want to. If it helps you get here sooner, it’s worth every single penny. If you can’t take Tony’s, take mine. Please.”

“Damn,” he cried. “It just helps to know you exist, you know that? Thank you. But no.”

“Consider it, please,” I pleaded. “Edward misses you. I miss you.” 

There was a pause, the phone moving away from his face for just a moment as he wiped it. I could hear the muffled rumblings of a tissue. “I miss you, too.” He swallowed. “Okay. I’ll consider it, but it makes me feel like rubbish.”

“It should make you feel wanted. It’s because you’re worth it, and we want you here with us.”

He sniffled again. “Do you really?”

“Both of us, with all of our hearts. Trust me,” I breathed. 

Jasper cleared his throat once more, trying to get control of his emotions, “I do. I’m sorry. I know it probably seems like I don’t, but… Thank you for listening to me. Tony is right, you do have the wonderful ability to take away one's anxiety.”

"Maybe I should have been a therapist," I said teasingly. He chuckled a bit weakly. "I want to be there for you, just like I am with Edward. Tell me when you're feeling stressed, whenever or whatever. Never apologize for needing to vent to me. Let me help because I want to. I want you to be happy, and I know you're not. I can feel it in my soul." 

“You make me very happy. Both of you make me very happy." He sighed heavily, and I could hear him scrubbing his hand over his face roughly. "Alright, I have to get back in there. Fuck. I'm having a fit in the jeep on my cigarette break." He took several deep breaths. “I’ll talk to you later.”   

I nodded to myself, wiping a stray tear away from my cheek. “Alright. Call me, okay? When you get off.”

When I hung up the phone, I asked Edward what Jasper's favorite cookies were in a text. I could maybe make some for both of my men. I would overnight them to Jasper, possibly. He answered quickly with a list of them. Then he asked me ‘why’, wondering if I had a video idea.   

"They canceled his time off, and I think we need to send him something nice to make him feel better.” I also needed a distraction. 

"Fuck. Yeah. Okay. I'm actually just sitting around in the makeup chair right now. I'll do a little research and send him something good from a bakery in Sydney. It’ll be quicker. I’ll have them delivered to the station. Cheer him up. I assume you already tried to talk him into coming and it didn't work?”

I wiped my nose with the back of my hand. It was runny. “No, it didn’t. Fuck his father, btw,” I answered back. “Fuck him so hard.”

“Agreed. I’m sending him some cookies now. Damn.” Then he sent a whole bunch of sad face emojis. 

"It'll be okay. It's only a couple of months. And I'll work on him until then.”

“Well, if anyone’s charms could persuade him, it would be yours,” he replied quickly. 

I bit my lip, trying to ignore my feelings. “I just need to send him a tin of my chocolate chip cookies with your naked picture inside.” 

“I’ll pose for those later,” he promised with several winks and a couple of devil faces. I laughed a little to myself despite my sorrow. “Gotta go act for a minute.”

“Break a leg. You’ve got this.”

Edward sent another wink and a kissing face in return. I giggled at it, but my heart ached. I couldn’t imagine how heartbroken he was. He had to pretend for work, though. At least he was better at keeping up his mask than I was. 


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